But... that is a face-punchin

Ah, alcohol, the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Give me



any day.

From TFA: Edward Trevor Aldridge, 47, pleaded guilty in Christchurch District Court to assault and Judge Raoul Neave told him: "This sort of behaviour would be immature in teenagers or small children. This is exactly the sort of behaviour that makes people afraid to go to town."

That's odd. When I go to town I'm less worried about being punched in the face than I am someone else breaching urinal etiquette.

Submitter: Stare at my junk while I'm standing at the urinal? That's a face-punchin'. No, wait, it's two

Damn right it is!

Should have just peed on him.

FTA: "When (the victim) spoke to the defendant he was effectively smirking. The defendant was outraged.


So, what, if the guy had been gazing in open admiration, all wide-eyed and, like, in awe, then it would have been okay?

a face-punch does seem to be an over-reaction given the circumstances. maybe he should have just pissed on his face.

FTFA - "When (the victim) spoke to the defendant he was effectively smirking. The defendant was outraged."


Seems to me like the defendant was very insecure about his manhood, and I guess the victim was smirking because his johnson was that much bigger.

flumpth: a face-punch does seem to be an over-reaction given the circumstances. maybe he should have just pissed on his face.

Nah, probably would have liked hat.

Just turn your hips towards him. Give him a good look while you soak his loafers.

The rules are fairly simple:

No eye contact
Don't use a urinal if it's next to a urinal that somebody else is using unless it is strictly necessary to do so
Never, under any circumstances, speak - not even to a good friend

Cornered Beef: flumpth: a face-punch does seem to be an over-reaction given the circumstances. maybe he should have just pissed on his face.

Nah, probably would have liked hat.



Free Hat!

No talking at the urinals.

Mens Room Rules:

Do not talk to me while I am on the john.
Do not have a conversation with me while I am at the urinal (a "hello" or "good morning" will do, just don't tell me about your damn day)
While at the unrinal, if possible, never go to the urinal next to mine, always try to leave an open urinal between us. If that is not possible, than you can use the one next to me (also, use the stall if that is open as well).
If the room is empty, never go to the middle urinal, always go to the side ones (try to keep only one urinal next to you, not one on each side).
Always face forward at the urinal,or down if you want to, just don't look around if other people are in there.

/add your own if needed...
//restroom is relaxaition time, don't bother me while I am in there.

This is just a variation of the "God that water's cold" routine.

Then again, sometimes when I'm shaking it off I do hit the urinal, causing a clang, that does draw stares.

"Suede!"

"Asparagus."

-- Wolf

12.fl.oz.: No talking at the urinals.

Yes that's rule #1, rule #2 is that if there are 20 empty urinals, don't use the one right next to the one someone else is using.

They should put up a sign in the bathroom with these rules.

Jesus christ, this kind of idiotic redneckism would be funny if it didn't lead to so many assaults and murders. Grow up, child-men. If another man sees your penis, you will not magically turn into a homosexual.

I'm not sure WHAT happened since the guy was drunk and he ALREADY had 300hrs of service to do, the extra 50 is not going to bother him.

Just say NO, or "I WILL punch you unless you leave now"

All I ask is that I be allowed to kill the people who want to have conversations while taking a leak. We're not chicks, we're not Republicans. The restroom is not a social place.

Pee time is me time. STFU.

I don't mind if someone looks over at me when I'm at the urinal. If it weren't mine I would be astonished by how huge it is myself.

citizen905: All I ask is that I be allowed to kill the people who want to have conversations while taking a leak. We're not chicks, we're not Republicans. The restroom is not a social place.

Pee time is me time. STFU.

George Michael unavailable for comment.

"Police prosecutor Sergeant Graham Butcher said the victim went gone to the Rock Pool bar with friends on December 16."

The victim went gone? What does that mean in English?

Burr: Mens Room Rules:

Do not talk to me while I am on the john.
Do not have a conversation with me while I am at the urinal (a "hello" or "good morning" will do, just don't tell me about your damn day)
While at the unrinal, if possible, never go to the urinal next to mine, always try to leave an open urinal between us. If that is not possible, than you can use the one next to me (also, use the stall if that is open as well).
If the room is empty, never go to the middle urinal, always go to the side ones (try to keep only one urinal next to you, not one on each side).
Always face forward at the urinal,or down if you want to, just don't look around if other people are in there.

/add your own if needed...
//restroom is relaxaition time, don't bother me while I am in there.

Don't laugh if someone has to let out a little gas, sometimes its necessary.

Reminds me back in the day my brother and I would go drinking and when we would pick a random guy and then either he or I would follow "the victim" into the bathroom, park right next to him and in mid-stream look over and say "Nice C*ck!"

/Yes for us it was a pocket full of awesome because we felt dirty breaking the unwritten rules of the john.
//no I was never face-punched
///yes I had to fend off at least two guys wanting to give me their number...

/threadjack - on/

This term "junk" - who came up with that? Must have had a very small opinion of his own, erm, "junk".

/threadjack - off/

ya'll might want to go ahead and roll out that internet toughguy pic now. You're gonna need it. . .

Inbredpoet: Reminds me back in the day my brother and I would go drinking and when we would pick a random guy and then either he or I would follow "the victim" into the bathroom, park right next to him and in mid-stream look over and say "Nice C*ck!"

/Yes for us it was a pocket full of awesome because we felt dirty breaking the unwritten rules of the john.
//no I was never face-punched
///yes I had to fend off at least two guys wanting to give me their number...

Or look at the guy next to you and say "nice watch". Even funnier when they're not wearing a watch.

No Such Agency: Jesus christ, this kind of idiotic redneckism would be funny if it didn't lead to so many assaults and murders. Grow up, child-men. If another man sees your penis, you will not magically turn into a homosexual.

Well seeing the penis per se isn't the crime, it's when the glance is pre-meditated that we have a problem.

No Such Agency: If another man sees your penis, you will not magically turn into a homosexual.

What if you rub it and make a wish?

If you look at another guy's penis expect to be punched. What is so hard to understand about that?

Reminds me a bit of this:

Bash.org

hard2bnice: Inbredpoet: Reminds me back in the day my brother and I would go drinking and when we would pick a random guy and then either he or I would follow "the victim" into the bathroom, park right next to him and in mid-stream look over and say "Nice C*ck!"

/Yes for us it was a pocket full of awesome because we felt dirty breaking the unwritten rules of the john.
//no I was never face-punched
///yes I had to fend off at least two guys wanting to give me their number...

Or look at the guy next to you and say "nice watch". Even funnier when they're not wearing a watch.

OMG We were so dumb! That would have been so much better!
Now I'm mad because I have to wait til tonight for the bars to fill up...

Inbredpoet: Now I'm mad because I have to wait til tonight for the bars to fill up...

Those long winter nights must just fly by...

Hell, I remember the old Atalanta Fulton co. stadium. You had to pee in a trough. Sometimes you were shoulder to shoulder with another guy. Look straight ahead ....SAY NOTHING.

So what if the glance is premeditated?

My favorite was to walk up while a friend was peeing in a crowded restroom, use the urinal next to his, and say (just a little too loudly), "my god! that thing's huge!" then look to see who tried to look.

Also good promotion for your friends when in gay bars.

SamTana: Inbredpoet: Now I'm mad because I have to wait til tonight for the bars to fill up...

Those long winter nights must just fly by...

What is this winter you speak of?
/Nashvegas

SamTana: No Such Agency: If another man sees your penis, you will not magically turn into a homosexual.

What if you rub it and make a wish?

I've always thought the story of Aladdin's lamp is phallic. Look at "I Dream of Jeannie". The show is a total sex fantasy.

Inbredpoet: SamTana: Inbredpoet: Now I'm mad because I have to wait til tonight for the bars to fill up...

Those long winter nights must just fly by...

What is this winter you speak of?
/Nashvegas

No wonder you like to gamble...

Get your hands off my junk! (new window)

SamTana: Inbredpoet: SamTana: Inbredpoet: Now I'm mad because I have to wait til tonight for the bars to fill up...

Those long winter nights must just fly by...

What is this winter you speak of?
/Nashvegas

No wonder you like to gamble...

Yes...that's it...
/Nashville
//it never occured to me that it could be taken another way...

Oh, sorry, the use of "vagas" rather than "ville" achieved its purpose of failing to communicate what you were actually talking about.

/ Where do you come from?
// New Angeles!

added rule: Don't eat the urinal mint.

The rule is that you look forward, or down at your own if circumstances require, in silence. That's it. That's all.

Conversation can begin or continue once your respective pants, underwear (if in use), zipper (or button-fly), and belt (if in use) are back to pre-pee positions.

thisispete: There's one exception to this - if you're on the john and have run out of toilet paper, it's acceptable to ask your neighbour for some to be passed under the partition.

No foot tapping, though.

no I don't have a square to spare, I can't spare a square

ah3133:
No Such Agency: Jesus christ, this kind of idiotic redneckism would be funny if it didn't lead to so many assaults and murders. Grow up, child-men. If another man sees your penis, you will not magically turn into a homosexual.

Well seeing the penis per se isn't the crime, it's when the glance is pre-meditated that we have a problem.

OK: If another man looks at your penis, you will not magically turn into a homosexual, either.

No Such Agency: ah3133:
No Such Agency: Jesus christ, this kind of idiotic redneckism would be funny if it didn't lead to so many assaults and murders. Grow up, child-men. If another man sees your penis, you will not magically turn into a homosexual.

Well seeing the penis per se isn't the crime, it's when the glance is pre-meditated that we have a problem.

OK: If another man looks at your penis, you will not magically turn into a homosexual, either.

That's better, now you've established criminal intent.