Ow My Balls
6) Gentle Giants rescue.

I love Gentle Giant! Free Hand was an incredible LP.

I dunnno... may favourites [and the only ones I have] are:
1. Their debut album [actually pretty damn good for a debut]
2. Playing the Fool: Live [great rockin live versions]
3. Three Friends [actually isn't as bad as some say --- it's like their Islands or Lizard album]
4. Interview [i don't like it that much... never really got into it or played it very much]

That being said, they're EXCELLENT musicians, and have a few great singers in it [lead singer has some great pipes]... cool acapella (spelling?) bits in some songs too.

but seriously why the hell did i read that

Between the dolphin orgies and the disappearing car door video, I can't really say I feel disappointed.

Also the abstinence one was funny too, please don't throw anything at me.

ArchAngel: No, sorry, booze is not on this stupid list. It's obvious the writer of the article and the submitter have never had a real adult beverage. Absinthe does not count. It is a gay, hippie bullshiat wannabe that should remain in gay, hippie Europe.

But Whiskipedia!

ArchAngel: No, sorry, booze is not on this stupid list. It's obvious the writer of the article and the submitter have never had a real adult beverage. Absinthe does not count. It is a gay, hippie hipster bullshiat wannabe that should remain in gay, hippie hipster Europe.

FTFY

An entire Mark Morford article that didn't mention dildos?

Mr. Xhin: Remember those horrible times in the 1990's when our biggest worries were blowjobs and what to do with a huge budget surplus?

Truly horrible times those were...

/sigh!
//Farking republican traitors.

Don't forget slaughtered Serbians. Great job, Rock Star Clinton! Can't wait for your wife to continue the bullshiat...10 bucks says she has a box of Cubans on her desk too...

I'm happy about boobies and beer.

Bith Set Me Up: Ennuipoet: FTA:10) Dolphins love sex. Frequent, kinky, aggressive, even violent. Homosexual, bisexual, incestuous, you name it. Sometimes with other species. Sometimes gang-rape style. Sometimes in frothy orgies. Sometimes (sort of) with humans. Yes, dolphins.

So, swimming along and all of the sudden I'm being gang raped by dolphins and this is supposed to make me happy? I know this is from the Gate, but seriously...

/Do Not Want Dolphin Rape



Unavailable for comment

/obscure?

Good episode...heh, always makes me chuckle.

Robobuu: Here's a nice summary:

1) Fark Bush.
2) The GOP is bad.
3) Random celeb shiat.
4) The GOP is boring.
5) OMG Google!
6) ... Dogs?
7) O'Reilly sucks.
8) Indirectly fark the GOP.
9) Yay, more free liberal media!
10) Bestiality!
11) Let's look smart.
12) Let's attack some nutbag IDers.
13) OMG! Bottled water NOOOO!
14) Old people.
15) fark the GOP.
16) Organic, nomnomnom.
17-25) Let's get lazy!
26) fark Bush!
27) Haha, the GOP is wrong.
28) Everything sucks, and it's the GOP's fault.
29) OMG NO MOAR BUshiathanks very much Robobuu for the summary. After reading #1 I decided not to test my gag reflex any further.

sombreradoraloca

Yeah I fell into that trap... one of the many reasons I hate the internet

WTF... for those of you without the Fark Decoder Ring, this is how my post should read, detached from Robobu's post.

Thanks very much Robobuu for the summary. After reading #1 I decided not to test my gag reflex any further.

Wow, it's great that abstinence education is a failure. Yippee!!! With greater access to birth control than ever before, our country is seeing more and more illegitimate children being born and more widespread suffering due to STDs. Wasn't that supposed to be the nightmare scenario for when we RESTRICTED that kind of shiat?!

Don't believe the lies, people. Commitment to abstinence is the ONLY way out of this quagmire. Everything else keeps making us lazier, sicker, and less responsible. It's the ONLY WAY. Every other solution has made things WORSE.

lettergetter: Don't forget slaughtered Serbians.

Yeah, what's up with not letting people do some ethnic cleansing?

You don't really want to compare the foreign policies of the Clinton administration with those of the current one, do you?

Tits and booze are high on my agenda.

Chach: Wow, it's great that abstinence education is a failure. Yippee!!! With greater access to birth control than ever before, our country is seeing more and more illegitimate children being born and more widespread suffering due to STDs. Wasn't that supposed to be the nightmare scenario for when we RESTRICTED that kind of shiat?!

Don't believe the lies, people. Commitment to abstinence is the ONLY way out of this quagmire. Everything else keeps making us lazier, sicker, and less responsible. It's the ONLY WAY. Every other solution has made things WORSE.

Abstinence works. Abstinence education has so far failed to keep teens abstinent. Abstinence-only education has kept teens dumber about birth control. Those are the facts. Live with them.

NYTimes OP ed pages (new window)

Here ya go Republican Farkers. This will help with your vapors.

Conservos are always telling us lefties to cheer up and quit whining, aren't they? Then when we cheer up and quit whining they get all moody about it. It's like the U.S. is on its period.

Sure are a lot of folks who can't help but set up a soap box in the center ring of a three ring circus.

Welcome back my friends to the show that never ends...
come inside, come inside.

/ The land of Fark is covered by a circus tent
// That makes it a FUN place to visit!
/// We GOTZ LOTZ O' CLOWNZ

#30. Following all the rules.

/NO WAY!
//Better not be obscure
///Hic-a-doo-lah!

cold beer...warm p**** and a place to s*** that gots a door on it. I mean...you don't want th' dog lookin' atcha !

#2 was a prank/joke. Way to go SFC factcheckers.

elpepe55: #2 was a prank/joke. Way to go SFC factcheckers.

Came here to post that. Shocked that this thread got to 70 posts before someone pointed that out.

Wow. What an utter douche.

Women and minorities appear to be galvanized by Hillary Clinton's presidential run. Youth and college-educated voters appear to be galvanized by Barack Obama's. No one at all is truly, deeply galvanized by Mitt Romney or John McCain or crazy little Mike Huckabee, and everyone is generally repulsed by the fetid little tyrant that is Rudy Giuliani. All of this, remarkably, seems just about exactly as it should be.

Eh, anyone voting for either of the first two because they're "one of us!" should really re-examine the purpose behind voting and being an educated citizen.

No one's being "galvanized" by Romney or McCain because, well, the first one's kind of a pill and the second one still has bruises from '00 on top of the fact that he's not getting any younger.

I do appreciate all the candidates (current leaders at least) having an IQ greater than 80 this year.

Onager: I do appreciate all the candidates (current leaders at least) having an IQ greater than 80 this year.

Collectively?

This makes me happy.

25) Abstinence education is, of course, a dismal failure.

Oh boy am I glad this didn't work. I mean, who would actually have the nerve to think that abstinence has benefits!?! If only every idealistic idea would fail, this world would be a better place...

I would love to post something smart. I am not smart so I can't. I can only state that this was the dumbest thing I have ever read. So, therefore, I am now smarter, or dumber or whatever. I hate you all.

That was a happy list? That must be one bitter little man to label that a happy list. Way too much political nonsense, too much dwelling on superficialities in general. Thank goodness he's on the opposite side of the continent from me, at least.

Oh, my God...I can't stand this guy. It's like he makes lists of random words from the thesaurus then furiously crams them into his columns wherever he can, ticking them off as he goes along.

He's finds himself way too witty.

I wonder how many people (SF subscribers, or readers here) who "hate" the NRA, actually know what the NRA is all about. You know, like pushing for increased penalties for crimes committed with guns, pushing for instant background checks, that sort of thing.

Stopped reading after #1

when are journalists going to offer real news stories? that aren't just political hack garbage.

/not a republican
//sick of politics

Reads like an article out of Mother Jones.

I thought this was a list of things to be happy about. It just seemed like a long whiny diatribe to me. This guy is probably the biggest pussy on the planet.

Please excuse me, I need to go eat a black gay fetus named Hillary.

/Thanks for reminding me to renew my NRA membership...
//Suck it S.F.

awwww...did the mean columnist hurt a lot of republican feelings? Poor babies!

Sammy Jenkins, did you have anything of substance to say, or did you just want to make noise?

referring to the candidate who is Mormon as a "bizarre robotic nutball" is hate speech reminiscent of what they said of jfk.

so you don't like bush. i don't either. but he's just a symptom. i don't see harry reid, the senator from the mob, accomlishing d1ck.

we got a year of lameness ahead of us and then it'll be 8 years of the pathologically lying hillary to contend with. everything will be daisies then, i tell you what.

Robobuu
1) Fark Bush.
2) The GOP is bad.
3) Random celeb shiat.
4) The GOP is boring.
5) OMG Google!
6) ... Dogs?
7) O'Reilly sucks.
8) Indirectly fark the GOP.
9) Yay, more free liberal media!
10) Bestiality!
11) Let's look smart.
12) Let's attack some nutbag IDers.
13) OMG! Bottled water NOOOO!
14) Old people.
15) fark the GOP.
16) Organic, nomnomnom.
17-25) Let's get lazy!
26) fark Bush!
27) Haha, the GOP is wrong.
28) Everything sucks, and it's the GOP's fault.
29) OMG NO MOAR BUSH!


X

Why was this a link?

You need something to balance out the effects of the right-wing asshattery that is Little Green Footballs, the Free Republic and Cox and Forkum.

It's the leftwing, anti-gun, homo commie pinko treehugging hippies vs. Gawdfearin', Coors Light drinkin', NASCAR watchin', grit eatin', anti-abortion/pro-death penalty, home-schooled, trailer-dwellin', Bush-lovin', Clinton-hatin', war-mongerin', pro "family" libertarians!

srg59: Please excuse me, I need to go eat a black gay fetus named Hillary.

/Thanks for reminding me to renew my NRA membership...
//Suck it S.F.

He's a lefty. I doubt he cares much about your fetii dinner.

BigGrrr: WTF? Stop greenlighting whining libtard happy lists.
You don't like it?
Get the fark out of Fark!


FTFY, and Goodbye
Don't let the screen door hit ya where the good Lord split ya.

Zaphod B.

Dude, it's been long supposed that Fark is unbiased. Usually when one ridiculously leftist article is posted, a ridiculously right-wing one follows (and vice-versa). I agree with BigGrrr, however, that Fark should just avoid green-lighting absolute crap like this

There's no whining like republican whining.

food
farking
booze
internets
sleep
luxury pajamas
my big tv

that's all i need in life to keep me happy

oh yeah and i want a little dog

29 things? pffft

Software2 had it right.
Had the list just been political I would have dismissed it.

I still remember when I was a little kid and "pop-up" headlights were new and exciting. At the age of five, I *knew* that they'd look stupid if one was stuck in the "up" position all the time. Years later, I had just that problem. Thanks for enabling me to have a door that won't go up, even though it's raining out.

That proved the list was written by a moron.

Third_Uncle_Eno: Ow My Balls
6) Gentle Giants rescue.

I love Gentle Giant! Free Hand was an incredible LP.

I dunnno... may favourites [and the only ones I have] are:
1. Their debut album [actually pretty damn good for a debut]
2. Playing the Fool: Live [great rockin live versions]
3. Three Friends [actually isn't as bad as some say --- it's like their Islands or Lizard album]
4. Interview [i don't like it that much... never really got into it or played it very much]

That being said, they're EXCELLENT musicians, and have a few great singers in it [lead singer has some great pipes]... cool acapella (spelling?) bits in some songs too.

I only have Free Hand. I've had the opportunity to pay retail for CD remakes of the others, but I only buy old records now. I've seen them do a few other numbers on YouTube and would have to agree about their musicianship.