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(Rocky Mountain News)   The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a recipe for making beer that could be used at home   (rockymountainnews.com) divider line 150
    More: Asinine  
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14765 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Dec 2007 at 4:12 AM (6 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2007-12-29 11:22:28 PM
Gee....I wonder what'll happen when someone explains the concept of the internet to texas lawmakers?
 
2007-12-29 11:25:01 PM
Ingredients:

* 4 1/2lbs. american 2 row
* 1/8 lb. aromatic
* 1/8 lb. victory
* 1/4 lb. gambrinus honey malt
* 1/4 lb. crystal 80
* 1/2 oz. perle (60 min.)
* 1/4 oz. bullion (20 min.)
* 1 oz.hal. hersbuckler (steeped for 5 min.)
* 1/2 oz bramblings (dry hopped)
* 1 tsp. irish moss (15 min.)
* Wyeast 1056 Starter
* 1 tsp polyclar
* 2 1/2 tbs. corn sugar

Brewing Instructions:

Mash all grains.Glutamine rest at 95f. for 5 min.Raise to 122f.(protien rest) for 30 min.Raise to 155f. for 30 min. or untill iodine test comes out negative for starches.Raise to 170f. for 10 min.Sparge with 165f. water till you accumulate 4 gallons.Boil for 60 min. adding hops and irish moss at designated times.Cool to 75-80f and pitch yeast.Ferment and add corn sugar at bottleing time.
Fermentation:

* primary: 3 days at 70f.( No this is not a missprint 3 days)
* Secondary: 1 week @ 70F with Polyclar

* O.G.-1.060
* F.G.-1.010
* Alcohol-Approx.6%
 
2007-12-29 11:26:04 PM
Weaver95: Gee....I wonder what'll happen when someone explains the concept of the internet to texas lawmakers?

its too bad Molly Ivins died earlier this year, i would have loved to see her take on this.
 
2007-12-29 11:31:49 PM
But, I have a paper due on home brewing in space!
i227.photobucket.com
 
2007-12-29 11:51:30 PM
I call shenanigans.
 
2007-12-30 12:05:43 AM
This is not true. I saw a set at a bookstore last week.
 
2007-12-30 12:14:13 AM
SilentStrider: Weaver95: Gee....I wonder what'll happen when someone explains the concept of the internet to texas lawmakers?

its too bad Molly Ivins died earlier this year, i would have loved to see her take on this.


a treasure she was, but i grew up in texas with a Britannica. The author is making stuff up.
 
2007-12-30 12:24:15 AM
If you decide to send your youngster on a semester abroad to absorb some foreign common sense, don't imagine he'll get a taste of wine in Bordeaux or beer at the Hoffbrau Haus. The Drug Free Schools and Campuses Act prohibits Americans under 21 from conforming to the drinking laws and customs of their host countries.

Sense is dead.
 
2007-12-30 12:47:30 AM
Uhm. This isn't true at all. Britannica is in every public school I ever attended in Texas. The 'detour around dry counties' is complete nonsense as well. Not only that, but many people brew beer at home, and it's 100% legal. There are lots of stores that sell all of the supplies and grains.

/former bartender in Dallas... ...Austin... College Station...
 
2007-12-30 01:13:33 AM
xtex: The 'detour around dry counties' is complete nonsense as well.

Um, wrong:

Alcoholic Beverages in Dry Areas
[Section 101.31 AB Code]
Generally, no person in a dry area may manufacture, distill, brew, sell, import into the state, export from the state, transport, distribute, warehouse, store, solicit or take orders for, or possess with intent to sell an alcoholic beverage.
 
2007-12-30 01:14:36 AM
Rocky Mountain News - 'nough said.
they wouldn't know a fact if it bit 'em in the arse.
 
2007-12-30 01:21:14 AM
dahmers love zombie: xtex: The 'detour around dry counties' is complete nonsense as well.

Um, wrong:

Alcoholic Beverages in Dry Areas
[Section 101.31 AB Code]
Generally, no person in a dry area may manufacture, distill, brew, sell, import into the state, export from the state, transport, distribute, warehouse, store, solicit or take orders for, or possess with intent to sell an alcoholic beverage.


Annnnnd, I'm the one who is wrong. I was dumb enough to believe the Texas Alcohol Beverage Law Enforcement Training Guide, and used it as my source. Amusingly, though they tell cops that it's illegal to transport alcohol through a dry area, the statutes in fact say the exact opposite. My apologies, xtex.
 
2007-12-30 01:25:41 AM
Thanks to whiskeyinthejar, Fark is now illegal in the state of Texas.
 
2007-12-30 01:36:03 AM
Considering how quickly the information changes, why would you buy the Encyclopedia Britannica anyway?

I'm sure it's outdated by the time it even goes to press.
 
2007-12-30 02:42:04 AM
AntiNorm: Thanks to whiskeyinthejar, Fark is now illegal in the state of Texas.

The whole damn state of Texas should be kicked out of the union. They're the source of a massive amount of sheer stupidity; and the main reason (due to electoral votes) that the country has been hijacked by the religious right.
 
2007-12-30 02:50:21 AM
TheCid: AntiNorm: Thanks to whiskeyinthejar, Fark is now illegal in the state of Texas.

The whole damn state of Texas should be kicked out of the union. They're the source of a massive amount of sheer stupidity; and the main reason (due to electoral votes) that the country has been hijacked by the religious right. is stuck in a clusterfark in Iraq


Here FTFY
 
2007-12-30 03:46:32 AM
considering that delivery drivers carrying anything alcoholic must detour around the state's dry counties.

Actually every county in TX is automatically dry, it is the cities within them which must put to a vote and pass laws allowing alcohol sales. Also I own Encyclopedia Britannica. This article is either A. dumb satire, B. a crock of shiat, or C. the typical thing that someone from CO would believe.
 
2007-12-30 03:54:28 AM
AntiNorm: Thanks to whiskeyinthejar, Fark is now illegal in the state of Texas.

My work is done here!

/flies to the next crisis.
 
2007-12-30 04:18:30 AM
Thanks, Subby - I've been wondering what I could hate Texas for this week.
 
2007-12-30 04:22:57 AM
Those are some ridiculous laws.

I noticed that the "Illegal to get fish drunk" is up again. I looked that up and what I initially figured is right. Tha's illegal because alcohol paralyzes fish, causing them to float up to the surface where they can be collected. It's a less noisy, less dangerous alternative to dynamite. They had a problem with people dropping loads of alcohol into areas of lakes so they passed this law.

At least it has a reason.
 
2007-12-30 04:26:06 AM
Weaver95: Gee....I wonder what'll happen when someone explains the concept of the internet to texas lawmakers?

I was wondering that myself. What's stopping anyone from getting a beer recipe online or even from a library book for that matter? Out of curiousity I found sites for some of Texas' public libraries & the two I checked (Houston & San Antonio) had books on beer making.
 
2007-12-30 04:27:23 AM
While we're on the subject, can anyone explain to me the reason for the law that nobody can actually be seen taking a sip of beer in a beer commercial?
 
2007-12-30 04:27:59 AM
Wow - talk about complete and utter bullshiat - whoever wrote this article must take their facts from those funny emails their friend at work forwards them.

/soooo sick of people spreading bullshiat misinformation like this!
 
2007-12-30 04:30:01 AM
RagingLeonard: This is not true. I saw a set at a bookstore last week.

Trying to tell me that it's impossible that whomever carried it wasn't aware of that law?
 
2007-12-30 04:30:21 AM
I call Shenanigans. There are brewery suppliers based out of Dallas.

The item used to be that the EB was illegal in CANADA or AUSTRALIA for having brewing instructions.
 
2007-12-30 04:31:28 AM
whiskeyinthejar: Ingredients:

* 4 1/2lbs. american 2 row
* 1/8 lb. aromatic
* 1/8 lb. victory
* 1/4 lb. gambrinus honey malt
* 1/4 lb. crystal 80
* 1/2 oz. perle (60 min.)
* 1/4 oz. bullion (20 min.)
* 1 oz.hal. hersbuckler (steeped for 5 min.)
* 1/2 oz bramblings (dry hopped)
* 1 tsp. irish moss (15 min.)
* Wyeast 1056 Starter
* 1 tsp polyclar
* 2 1/2 tbs. corn sugar

Brewing Instructions:

Mash all grains.Glutamine rest at 95f. for 5 min.Raise to 122f.(protien rest) for 30 min.Raise to 155f. for 30 min. or untill iodine test comes out negative for starches.Raise to 170f. for 10 min.Sparge with 165f. water till you accumulate 4 gallons.Boil for 60 min. adding hops and irish moss at designated times.Cool to 75-80f and pitch yeast.Ferment and add corn sugar at bottleing time.
Fermentation:

* primary: 3 days at 70f.( No this is not a missprint 3 days)
* Secondary: 1 week @ 70F with Polyclar

* O.G.-1.060
* F.G.-1.010
* Alcohol-Approx.6%


What beer doesn't have a little victory in it?

/And yes, win is a perfectly good substitute.
//And yes, a beer is not a Coor's, Busch, or any of that other crap, especially Blatz!
 
2007-12-30 04:35:53 AM
dahmers love zombie: If you decide to send your youngster on a semester abroad to absorb some foreign common sense, don't imagine he'll get a taste of wine in Bordeaux or beer at the Hoffbrau Haus. The Drug Free Schools and Campuses Act prohibits Americans under 21 from conforming to the drinking laws and customs of their host countries.

Sense is dead.


Agreed. This sounds like a law on the books that's never enforced, but it makes you wonder why it's there in the first place. I wonder what idiot pushed this legislation in the first place.
 
2007-12-30 04:40:38 AM
Well, there's a lot of laws that should be repealed, no?

/ *stomach turned, reading the cat torture story on the sidebar*
 
2007-12-30 04:45:18 AM
starsrift: Well, there's a lot of laws that should be repealed, no?

I've always thought that there should be a law in place that states that every law needs to be reviewed periodically, say every 20 years or so. There are so many laws still in place solely because they've been there forever, which is an awful reason to exist.
 
2007-12-30 04:45:55 AM
dahmers love zombie: xtex: The 'detour around dry counties' is complete nonsense as well.

Um, wrong:

Alcoholic Beverages in Dry Areas
[Section 101.31 AB Code]
Generally, no person in a dry area may manufacture, distill, brew, sell, import into the state, export from the state, transport, distribute, warehouse, store, solicit or take orders for, or possess with intent to sell an alcoholic beverage.


It's legal if you have a permit. From The Texas Alcoholic Beverage Code

CHAPTER 41. CARRIER PERMIT

Sec. 41.01. AUTHORIZED ACTIVITIES. (a) The holder of a carrier permit may transport liquor into and out of this state and between points within the state.
(b) The holder may transport liquor from one wet area to another wet area across a dry area if that course of transportation is necessary or convenient.

Sec. 41.02. FEE. The annual state fee for a carrier permit is $30.
 
2007-12-30 04:47:00 AM
America home of the braves stupid laws... ROTFL
 
2007-12-30 04:47:39 AM
Weaver95: Gee....I wonder what'll happen when someone explains the concept of the internet to texas lawmakers?

OMG...if we've been drinking in another state, and are looking at web pages from a server in Texas, or looking at any web pages where the packets traversed a network in Texas, are we breaking the law? Maybe just reading a story about Texas is cause for suspicion?

er...I wasn't here...
 
2007-12-30 04:51:53 AM
Matty:

Liquor advertisers created a "Code of Conduct" a long time ago. Since ads can be seen by the underage community, they feel by someone enjoying a beer would give the young lad ideas that beer (or any alcohol) tastes good. It's probably what saved them from getting banned from television like Tobacco ads were. My understanding is that this Code is a voluntary one, but if a company were to stray from it, they probably would be banned from TV by the networks. There have been risque commercials that have already been pulled.
 
2007-12-30 04:51:59 AM
Baby ... bathwater ... OUT! BOTH OF YOU! NOW!
 
2007-12-30 04:52:56 AM
Good thing the founding fathers created this free place so we could make up all these rules too follow.

/Huh?

//Land of the free! (To follow the farking rules!)
//Home of the brave! (Ancesters.)
 
2007-12-30 04:53:37 AM
As someone who lives in Texas, I'm really getting a kick ..... yeah.

Anyway, it wouldn't surprise me in the least if there is someplace within Texas that banned the Britannica, but given that a friend and I just brewed two batches of beer in the last month with supplies we bought in Dallas (including instructions!), I'd have to say it's more than unlikely that it's banned state wide.

Also, their "after midnight" / "all day Monday" thing is a crock. You can't sell beer before 7AM on Monday, at least according to TABC.

/TABC's full of it half the time tho
 
2007-12-30 04:57:48 AM
img.photobucket.com

Someone call for the Bookmobile?
 
2007-12-30 05:04:58 AM
randomstranger: starsrift: Well, there's a lot of laws that should be repealed, no?

I've always thought that there should be a law in place that states that every law needs to be reviewed periodically, say every 20 years or so. There are so many laws still in place solely because they've been there forever, which is an awful reason to exist.


There's also a lot of laws that should remain in place. Bringing them up for review to open them up for significant change could be a bad thing - again, no politician wants to appear lenient on criminals, and thus we could find something like a petty theft penalty slowly evolving from a fine or minute quantity of jailtime to life in prison.

Furthermore, what happens to the person who was charged just a day or two before a law comes up for change, and has a drastically different sentence? Current precedent would indicate that law at the time of the charge would hold sway, but is that ethical?

While my hypothetical is an obvious strawman of extremes, I think calling all laws up for periodic review would be, in the end, too problematic to warrant implementation.


The fact is, copyright law does come up for review every twenty years or so, as Disney, and others, seek to extend it.
 
2007-12-30 05:05:57 AM
starsrift: The fact is, copyright law does come up for review every twenty years or so, as Disney, and others, seek to extend it.

EYE YAM CROSSIN DE STREAMS!
 
2007-12-30 05:06:21 AM
Of course you realize, er...nevermind, most of you don't: You gave in and believed the article 100%, and the subby who is clearly an idiot for being sensational rather than rational. Fark members need an Ironic tag on them just for posting some of the stupidity found in this thread.

The "entire" must be that 1 tiny bit, some of you, like the author of the article (and the subby), seem to believe the *whole* (ah-ha, whole/complete sounds very near "entire", especially when mis-used in the context of the author and subby) Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas.

I assure you it is not. We've always had the Encyclopedia Britannica in my school libraries, public libraries, and sold on TV like everywhere else.

Maybe some of you should try to...I dunno...take a cue from the theme of Fark.com and realize that sensational headlines, and sensational generalizations make for "great" journalism, but really have little basis in fact.

Subby- maybe try some of that reading comprehension "thing" some time. Or grow a couple of brain cells.

Idiots.
 
2007-12-30 05:08:25 AM
Two things I wish every Texan to have plenty of: alcohol and ammunition.
 
2007-12-30 05:18:41 AM
If you decide to send your youngster on a semester abroad to absorb some foreign common sense, don't imagine he'll get a taste of wine in Bordeaux or beer at the Hoffbrau Haus. The Drug Free Schools and Campuses Act prohibits Americans under 21 from conforming to the drinking laws and customs of their host countries.

What a shame that Hollaway girl didn't know about this very important rule.
 
2007-12-30 05:25:29 AM
"The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a recipe for making beer that could be used at home"

Thus creating opportunities to taze and execute people
 
2007-12-30 05:33:53 AM
This isn't true at all. Britannica is in every public school I ever attended in Texas. The 'detour around dry counties' is complete nonsense as well.

Perhaps it is not enforced, but there are plenty of stupid laws everywhere. It just doesn't suprise me that Texas has stupid laws to keep people stupid. Seems to go hand in hand all the way up to their representatives...
 
2007-12-30 05:37:01 AM
starsrift: There's also a lot of laws that should remain in place. Bringing them up for review to open them up for significant change could be a bad thing - again, no politician wants to appear lenient on criminals, and thus we could find something like a petty theft penalty slowly evolving from a fine or minute quantity of jailtime to life in prison.

Furthermore, what happens to the person who was charged just a day or two before a law comes up for change, and has a drastically different sentence? Current precedent would indicate that law at the time of the charge would hold sway, but is that ethical?

While my hypothetical is an obvious strawman of extremes, I think calling all laws up for periodic review would be, in the end, too problematic to warrant implementation.


The fact is, copyright law does come up for review every twenty years or so, as Disney, and others, seek to extend it.


Yeah, there is room for abuse, but there are ways around that. I think overall it would do a lot of good for our country to take a look at itself every decade or two to see how things have progressed, how things have changed, and see what we've been doing that we can tweak and do differently. Sure, it'd take a lot of time and cost money, but I think the gains outweigh the losses here. I'm also of the belief that every zip code needs its own representative in the legislature; what are we at now, 1 representative for every 800,000 people?
 
2007-12-30 05:40:49 AM
As usual with these kinds of stories, all of these are urban legends. I was suspicious of the New York saloon claim, seeing as how I go to NYC all the time and know for a fact that it isn't true, and just doing a Yahoo yellow pages search yields eighteen establishments with that word in their name.

Likewise, the headline is completely false -- there is no law in Texas banning the Encyclopedia Britannica, in whole or in part. In other words,

i86.photobucket.com
 
2007-12-30 06:05:20 AM
randomstranger: Yeah, there is room for abuse, but there are ways around that. I think overall it would do a lot of good for our country to take a look at itself every decade or two to see how things have progressed, how things have changed, and see what we've been doing that we can tweak and do differently. Sure, it'd take a lot of time and cost money, but I think the gains outweigh the losses here. I'm also of the belief that every zip code needs its own representative in the legislature; what are we at now, 1 representative for every 800,000 people?

I am interested in a serious discussion, but at the same I can't help but think WTF? How would you propose a way to "get around" politicians advocating tougher penalties on crime, so as not to be portrayed as being "weak" on crime, or lenient to criminals?

And each zip code needs a representative? If you thought the apportionment of power is pooched now, what happens when those one or two guys living in an industrial or commercial zip have their own representative, and the guy who's representing a few city blocks full of apartment buildings is representing several thousand people? And they have equal voice? Obviously, I'd like to be one of the guys living in an industrial zip.

/ No, seriously.
// How would this work?
 
2007-12-30 06:12:28 AM
Holy cow, subby (and others) have set sail on the failboat.

The ironic part of this is, no matter how stupid you think Texans are, subby, Weaver, SilentStrider, etc., how stupid do you think you look swallowing the headline?
 
2007-12-30 06:30:11 AM
Who the hell still uses encyclopedias?
 
2007-12-30 06:31:57 AM
If the friend were in Texas, he might have a long wait, anyway, considering that delivery drivers carrying anything alcoholic must detour around the state's dry counties. Could this sort of clarity of thinking have anything to do with the fact that the entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a recipe for making beer that could be used at home?

These laws are not current, even if they are still on the books. When I was 10 My Dad purchased the Encyclopedia Britannica from a store in Longview (that would be 1976), and truckers have been allowed to route over the interstates since they opened. The truck drivers, however, could NOT got more than 500 yards from the interstate in a dry county (which sometimes made fueling a little tricky) and could not drive on NON-interstate or NON-federal highways in dry counties (Our next door neighbor drove for Schlitz).
 
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