FARK.com: (3294301) Child-slapping babysitter being charged with cruelty to children, Submitter's eyes

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		Child-slapping babysitter being charged with cruelty to children, Submitter's eyes (11alive.com)		95
		More: Dumbass

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16782 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Dec 2007 at 4:22 PM | Favorite | share:

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Slugs_of_a_banana_nature		2007-12-28 02:43:29 PM

...I've known women with that face. Usually lines like, 'What the F are you gunna do about it, huh?' and, 'Yeah I thought so biatch,' come plopping out of mouths like hers. She looks about two steps away from beating the crap out of anyone standing next to her.

She'll fit in well in the "ladies" jail.

dj_bigbird		2007-12-28 02:53:29 PM

Slugs_of_a_banana_nature: ...I've known women with that face. Usually lines like, 'What the F are you gunna do about it, huh?' and, 'Yeah I thought so biatch,' come plopping out of mouths like hers. She looks about two steps away from beating the crap out of anyone standing next to her.

She'll fit in well in the "ladies" jail.

Don't forget the over-exaggerated head bobbing and pointing.

Slugs_of_a_banana_nature		2007-12-28 03:01:04 PM

Right, can't forget that...

Hands-on-hips, jabbing her finger in the air?

...Oh god. She's straight out of Jerry Springer. If you accused her of being "Fat" she'd reply with, "You wish you kuld date me! Yeah! You wish you kuld! But Iz too good for you!"

Fraggler		2007-12-28 04:21:07 PM

People still name their kids Constance?

Sir Roderick Glossop		2007-12-28 04:26:09 PM

FTA: Constance Smith, 23, of Rockmart, was charged after the parents of a 13-month-old boy reported that they had video of Smith slapping the child in the face.

They think that's bad? I've got her on video breaking James Caan's legs with a sledgehammer.

Wombatzu		2007-12-28 04:26:27 PM

is "Submitter" like your title or something?

Englebert Slaptyback		2007-12-28 04:26:44 PM

Fraggler

People still name their kids Constance?

Always have, always will.

The Onanist		2007-12-28 04:27:33 PM

Englebert Slaptyback: Fraggler

People still name their kids Constance?

Always have, always will.

It's a constant.

Mr.Poops		2007-12-28 04:27:35 PM

biatch looks like she's 33, not 23. Yeesh.

Gleemax		2007-12-28 04:27:46 PM

Anybody got any eye bleach? i'm all out.

IdBeCrazyIf		2007-12-28 04:28:22 PM

Meh..... I'd hit it.

But we'd have to have the lights out and I'm gonna need a fifth of jack

Javelin22		2007-12-28 04:28:38 PM

Sir Roderick Glossop: FTA: Constance Smith, 23, of Rockmart, was charged after the parents of a 13-month-old boy reported that they had video of Smith slapping the child in the face.

They think that's bad? I've got her on video breaking James Caan's legs with a sledgehammer.

Thread over. You win.

Allen. The end.		2007-12-28 04:28:38 PM

I barfed. And I think her knees would have two smaller versions of the same face on them. Ew.

Maynard G. Muskievote		2007-12-28 04:29:00 PM

Fraggler: People still name their kids Constance?

The Rural Juror would like a word with you.

c.j.		2007-12-28 04:29:09 PM

I had a hot baby-sitter and she slapped and spanked me

/Diddn't mind
// well in my dreams

blustacon		2007-12-28 04:29:50 PM

"Honey we need a babysitter for our precious bundle of joy, but I don't want to spend a lot of money"

"How about an inmate on work release"?

"Make the call"

tnpir		2007-12-28 04:30:11 PM

Flying Lasagna Monster		2007-12-28 04:30:42 PM

JabbaTheButt		2007-12-28 04:31:44 PM

I'd hit it doggie style.

Tape a hustler or bigggjugggs magazine on her back and GIDDYAP!!!!

Bleak_Outlook		2007-12-28 04:31:45 PM

Wait... could it be?

www.11alive.com

Mustard Man has a sister!

amplexus		2007-12-28 04:32:25 PM

Obviously hired by the mother and not the father of said child.

LordJiro		2007-12-28 04:32:46 PM

I'm trying to come up with a joke relating this to the 'Fish-slapping dance', but my mind's a blank. C'mon, Farkers, help me out!

elpepe55		2007-12-28 04:33:38 PM

kill it with fire!

dc-kid		2007-12-28 04:34:54 PM

where's the eye bleach? where's the eye bleach? where's the eye bleach? where's the MOTHER FARKING EYE BLEACH!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

The Onanist		2007-12-28 04:35:19 PM

LordJiro: I'm trying to come up with a joke relating this to the 'Fish-slapping dance', but my mind's a blank. C'mon, Farkers, help me out!

upload.wikimedia.org

MCStymie		2007-12-28 04:36:20 PM

BoyGordita		2007-12-28 04:38:35 PM

That mugshot is just begging for a Buttsecks caption.

c.j.		2007-12-28 04:39:40 PM

A hot baby-sitter/nanny
www.planetblacksburg.com

can beat me all you want

/cuz I have been a bad boy
// really naughty

JohnnyApocalypse		2007-12-28 04:42:06 PM

so, i'm guessing not many here like fat girls...

thebouleoffools		2007-12-28 04:42:47 PM

My baby sitter when I was 6 gouged my cheek with her nails when she grabbed my face in anger, so I'm really getting a kick out of these replies.

Calvin Coolidge		2007-12-28 04:44:33 PM

If she lost a significant amount of weight she'd probably be cute.

Calvin Coolidge		2007-12-28 04:45:12 PM

You know, let me revise that: not cute, but perhaps hittable after a few drinks.

rufus-t-firefly		2007-12-28 04:45:34 PM

From their comments form:

"All posts that are off-topic, racially-charged, profane, vulgar, or otherwise in violation of the Terms of Service are subject to deletion. Users who post such material are subject to being banned from the 11Alive.com forums."

Good thing Fark doesn't have that policy...those are the best threads.

domenad		2007-12-28 04:45:35 PM

You'd think the exercise of beating a kid would have stripped some of the bark off of her, at least.

some attorney		2007-12-28 04:45:37 PM

I too would hit that.

nmchico24		2007-12-28 04:46:26 PM

They actually have an entire unit dedicated to "crimes against children" ??

/dnrtfa

Sethor		2007-12-28 04:47:16 PM

Now I know where to get my rock at.

thirstyVan		2007-12-28 04:48:15 PM

I'd let her put it in her mouth

/after several hours of drinking
//heavy drinking

c.j.		2007-12-28 04:48:34 PM

nmchico24 They actually have an entire unit dedicated to "~~crimes against~~ children" ??

/dnrtfa

?NAMBLA?

scott-ty		2007-12-28 04:50:15 PM

Lets see....mmmm the baby was 13 months and she slapped his face knocked him down and pinched him... yep, I for one hope they give that Copey Dunt 18 months or so jail time. Sterilazation would/should be another consideration... nuff said

Macular Degenerate		2007-12-28 04:50:30 PM

No eye bleach, but here's a pic of Allison Stokke to cleanse the palette

img292.imageshack.us

Anagrammer		2007-12-28 04:51:47 PM

Fraggler: People still name their kids Constance?

That name peaked in the 1940s, but it was still in the top 1000 names through the 1990s, according to the Baby Name Wizard (new window).

TeddyRooseveltsMustache		2007-12-28 04:52:05 PM

It's always the fat chick.

westbound pachyderm		2007-12-28 04:54:29 PM

Wow, Kathy Bates has really let herself go.

DaBishop		2007-12-28 04:55:04 PM

She looks just like Sarah Michelle Gellar.

Only 250# heavier.

And the face is different.

RiverKing		2007-12-28 04:56:18 PM

JabbaTheButt: I'd hit it doggie style.

Tape a hustler or bigggjugggs magazine on her back and GIDDYAP!!!!

Call her another girls name and hang on! The bucking bronco!

eelcat		2007-12-28 04:57:29 PM

RiverKing		2007-12-28 04:59:22 PM

He beat her to death.

Farkie von Farkenstiel		2007-12-28 05:01:10 PM

That beeyotch is just jealous because baby fat looks cute on a 13-month old.

StampedingElephant		2007-12-28 05:01:57 PM

dj_bigbird: Slugs_of_a_banana_nature: ...I've known women with that face. Usually lines like, 'What the F are you gunna do about it, huh?' and, 'Yeah I thought so biatch,' come plopping out of mouths like hers. She looks about two steps away from beating the crap out of anyone standing next to her.

She'll fit in well in the "ladies" jail.

Don't forget the over-exaggerated head bobbing and pointing.

Don't you need a neck for head-bobbing?

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