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(Globe and Mail)   Ontario woman, stay away from me-heee. Ontario woman, momma let me be-hee. Don't come hanging around my door, don't attack my gas station with a samurai sword   (theglobeandmail.com ) divider line 101
    More: Scary  
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6574 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Dec 2007 at 9:09 AM (8 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



101 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2007-12-04 10:03:41 AM  
OMG, it took me a least half an hour to get that joke. Im img1.fark.com now.
 
2007-12-04 10:03:57 AM  
Hetfield: Who is that chick? She's pretty hot.
 
2007-12-04 10:06:53 AM  
More talented:

The "Who" or "Guess Who"?
 
2007-12-04 10:08:45 AM  
calculator13 CRAP, WRONG THREAD...

FORGET THE JOHN DENVER POST, FOR ANOTHER THREAD.

SORRY MODS


You know, FAIL yes, but strangely enough, the John Denver thing does work here though.

/ kind of musical
// same decade
/// neither was about pirates
 
2007-12-04 10:11:16 AM  
But Mr. Reynolds, with the help of the two clerks, still managed to disarm their assailant and restrain her until police arrived.
I'd say Mr. Reynold's has better kung fu than her.
 
2007-12-04 10:15:38 AM  
tanman1975: There's a headline of the year contest?

There is! I think it shows up in January sometime, when the best-voted headlines from the TF side of the fence (I think) get posted for eveyrone to vote on. Starts with categories (main, geek, politics, etc) and then once they've all been voted to winners, those winners move on to the final vote for the year's best headline.

It was tons of fun last year - there were some hilarious gems. You could probably find some of the threads with the Fark search.
 
2007-12-04 10:32:41 AM  
This sounds like a crazy person sales promo

Crazy Ontario Women - "It slices."
/slices windows/
"It dices."
/cuts a car to slivers/
"It makes julienned clerks."
/attempts to cut clerks down/

//I'll wait for the tv series.
 
2007-12-04 10:33:24 AM  
danlpoon: More talented:

The "Who" or "Guess Who"?


The Guess Who by a mile!

/BURTON CUMMINGS FTW!!!!!
 
2007-12-04 10:34:54 AM  
The Guess Who by a mile!

I'm a sucker for lounge-jazz influenced rock also.

Put me in the "Guess Who" crowd.
 
2007-12-04 10:39:47 AM  
You know who else likes Lounge Jazz Influenced Rock
Thats right!

www.jeopardyinfo.com

/He's Canadian doncha know
 
2007-12-04 10:41:24 AM  
Shaggy_C: Deep Purple is the best band EVAR!

¿Deep Purple?

did they cover this?

yes, they rock.....Smoke on the Water, Hush, but better than the Who?

Sorry, Fail.

/mandatory slashie
 
2007-12-04 10:41:37 AM  
No Such Agency: Hetfield: Who is that chick? She's pretty hot.

Ha, she's way out of your league!

img519.imageshack.us
 
2007-12-04 10:43:16 AM  
No Such Agency: Hetfield: Who is that chick? She's pretty hot.

You don't know Kelly?!
 
2007-12-04 10:43:48 AM  
Fantastic, subby, you may have cost me my job for laughing so hard, but well played! If I had been taking a sip at the time, you'd owe me a new laptop.
 
2007-12-04 10:46:14 AM  
Hetfield: No Such Agency: Hetfield: Who is that chick? She's pretty hot.

Ha, she's way out of your league!


my eyes!!!

i158.photobucket.com

I am Phil, The Prince of Insufficient Light, and I Darn you to Heck for that pic!
 
2007-12-04 10:47:41 AM  
danlpoon: More talented:

The "Who" or "Guess Who"?


Oh geez... I love them both, each in their own season. You just had to pick 2 good ones, didn't you?

/compare & contrast 'American Woman' with 'Won't Get Fooled again'
 
2007-12-04 10:50:21 AM  
All the Canadian news sites carrying this story and not one has a picture! How are we supposed to decide if she's hittable crazy or just crazy?

/loves me some crazy chicks
 
2007-12-04 10:54:17 AM  
Hetfield- LOL

Ah, the drama of young love.

/well actually, i think my current g/f would go this apeshiat crazy if I dropped her, and she's 33
 
2007-12-04 10:54:39 AM  
+1 subby. usually I don't laugh at the lyric headlines but that one was pretty good.

and where is Hetfield original post? I wanna see the hot chick.
 
2007-12-04 10:56:17 AM  
compare & contrast 'American Woman' with 'Won't Get Fooled again'


That's hard.

You just had to pick 2 good ones, didn't you?

Yeah. The Guess Who is one of those bands I heard all their songs and never knew who they were until I went looking for them. The Who was all over when I was starting to care about music.
 
2007-12-04 10:56:43 AM  
easynerd: ObscureNameHere: -1
Subby tried waaaaaay too hard for that one.

+1
Subby's effort is well noted.

And for you, ObscureNameHere, -1 for baaaaaad troll.


Hey!
In my defence: When I saw "Don't come hanging around my door,", I had Tom Petty's "Don't come around here no more" pop into my head. This inexplicably blinded me to seening the obvious "American Woman" reference. So sue me.
 
2007-12-04 10:59:03 AM  
Since this thread has been useless without pictures of young women with katana -

i7.tinypic.com

You're welcome.
 
2007-12-04 10:59:53 AM  
+1 non-TF point for headline. Brilliant.

/A keyboard. You owe me a new one.
//Mildly worried about upcoming trip to Edmonton now, though.
 
2007-12-04 11:02:44 AM  
That song, for the foreseeable future, will only conjure up images of Kevin Spacey's character stoned in the SUV in American Beauty.
 
2007-12-04 11:05:17 AM  
subby is win!
 
2007-12-04 11:05:48 AM  
danlpoon: compare & contrast 'American Woman' with 'Won't Get Fooled again'

That's hard.

You just had to pick 2 good ones, didn't you?

Yeah. The Guess Who is one of those bands I heard all their songs and never knew who they were until I went looking for them. The Who was all over when I was starting to care about music.


For mellow, Burton Cummings gets me every time. I got into The Who late as well; but as a slightly-rebellious teenager, I found it cathartic to crank the volume on 'My Generation'.

/while wearing headphones
//I hope I die before I get old
///(never did take that literally)
 
2007-12-04 11:07:00 AM  
Very nice subby. Usually I'm skeptical of musical headlines, but the two today on the main page have been very nice.
 
2007-12-04 11:10:16 AM  
I found it cathartic to crank the volume on 'My Generation'.


For me, Guess Who came after the Who, Zep, Stones and Beatles.

Is it just me or is the music from my generation more kick-ass than music today or am I just absolutely correct?
 
2007-12-04 11:11:25 AM  
this is my town! hahaha I was always wondering when itd end up on Fark!
 
2007-12-04 11:12:38 AM  
people.brandeis.edu
 
2007-12-04 11:16:06 AM  
danlpoon: Is it just me or is the music from my generation more kick-ass than music today or am I just absolutely correct?

I think that there were a lot of songs back in the day that could be enjoyed on several levels: purely for the flow and rhythm of the melodic line (or for the driving beat), and often the lyrics operated on a deeper, more political level as well.

I don't find these things all together in most modern music; it seems more shallow...

/maybe I'm just old
//those were the days, my friend
 
2007-12-04 11:17:59 AM  
Classic rock trifecta in play?
 
2007-12-04 11:23:21 AM  
maybe I'm just old

I think I was just a sucker for English guys singing American blues-rock.

I won't completely disregard modern music. I love a lot of it. technology is the big thing now. We couldn't even make music like today back then.
 
2007-12-04 11:25:33 AM  
moogoob: Milton? Makes sense. Not a lot to do in Milton.

/Ontarian
//worse, I'm a Torontonian.
///to me, every other place in Ontario has nothing to do.
////except Muskoka. All about cottage country!
//bringin' back the slashies.


hey we just finally got a movie theater about 2 years ago... but yea, theres really nothing to do (except for harassing gas station employees with samurai swords).
 
2007-12-04 11:47:11 AM  
LOVE the Guess Who, even So Long, Bannatyne. (Well, most of it.)

All of you Cummings fans, try this if you can obtain his solo "I'm Scared" 45 record. Play it on 33 on purpose, and he sounds like a soul singer. It's hilarious, especially if you've just consumed half a 5th of tequila.

/never was much of a fan of American Woman, though.
//especially the cover version from about 8 years ago or so!!!
 
2007-12-04 12:05:15 PM  
Hetfield: No Such Agency: Hetfield: Who is that chick? She's pretty hot.

Ha, she's way out of your league!


That looks like Gary Cole.
 
2007-12-04 12:08:57 PM  
danlpoon: More talented:

The "Who" or "Guess Who"?


The Who. By a mile.
 
2007-12-04 12:09:22 PM  
I laughed and directed my colleague to fark. He said he was saving it for later this afternoon, where he'll have "even more nothing to do."
 
2007-12-04 12:30:38 PM  
Kyndig: +1 Subby for the headline...the headline of the year contest this year ought to be interesting.

Came here to say that.
 
2007-12-04 12:49:31 PM  
Anyone know Burton Cummings? Or know someone who knows him? Maybe we could get him to sing the headline and then we can put it on all of our answering machines or something.
 
2007-12-04 12:50:14 PM  
DrinkDifferent: Hetfield- LOL

Ah, the drama of young love.

/well actually, i think my current g/f would go this apeshiat crazy if I dropped her, and she's 33


Fark, I know mine would! She's already told me in that post coitus glow that she'd hunt me down and dismember me.
Crazy asians!
 
2007-12-04 01:03:05 PM  
FarkofTheSea:
//As for warnings i was warned about tubgirl but i didn't listen and all i can say is "I should have listened"


Would that be 'chocolate sundae' tubgirl? If so, I'm in the same boat as you.
 
2007-12-04 01:08:58 PM  
LOL, this is actually the gas station I use every couple days :P

Yay Milton!

/got red lighted :(
 
2007-12-04 01:09:35 PM  
Therion: Since this thread has been useless without pictures of young women with katana -



You're welcome.


Except that's not a Katana, that's a Wagasashi.

/two years of Kenjutsu
 
2007-12-04 02:39:11 PM  
khyberkitsune: Therion: Since this thread has been useless without pictures of young women with katana -



You're welcome.

Except that's not a Katana, that's a Wagasashi.

/two years of Kenjutsu



there is a sword in that picture?
 
2007-12-04 04:41:16 PM  
Rapmaster2000:

And then he says... "you have the right to remain silent."

/but the guy is screaming
//cause he's on fire
///doesn't shop here


Stop, drop and roll.
 
2007-12-05 01:03:55 AM  
Moose Jaw saw a few, Moosomin too
Runnin' back to Saskatoon
Red Deer, Terrace and a Medicine Hat
Sing another prairie tune
Sing another prairie tune
 
2007-12-05 01:25:45 AM  
tatum: Guess Who won't win headline of the year.
These Eyes have seen better.
She was definitely a Wild One - she'd come Undun - and no doubt that firefighter was Shakin' All Over.
I wonder why she and her boyfriend were Hurting Each Other.
No Sugar Tonight for that crazy biatch. The whole problem could have been solved if someone had had Guns, Guns, Guns


Game, set and match.

cutestthingever.typepad.com
 
2007-12-05 04:08:13 AM  
Karma Crusade
beat me to it.
 
2007-12-05 09:00:35 PM  
No Such Agency: Hetfield: Who is that chick? She's pretty hot.

what were you talking about, before Hetfield's second pic melted my eyes.
 
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