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(Gawker)   John Fitzgerald Page: the douche that keeps on douching. Listen closely to his whine about Fark mocking him   (gawker.com) divider line 1765
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29005 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Nov 2007 at 4:54 PM (6 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2007-11-20 08:16:20 PM  
Yeah, the second thread was much better-behaved. The first one was getting out of hand.

/in a good way
 
2007-11-20 08:16:22 PM  
Helena Handbasket: Why do you all keep calling him a douche?

/wouldn't let him anywhere near my p*ssy


FTW!

/Me neither
 
2007-11-20 08:16:25 PM  
McEnroe My Childhood Nemesis: mab1823: I was at the gym 26 minutes ago, and I only managed 1150 lbs. So I'm a little nervous.

Well, I am going to the gym in 26 minutes myself. Might just bench my convertible beemer right in the parking lot instead of actually going in, saves me some time in between being famous and being famous.



Tell me mab1823 isn't saying he benched 1100+ lbs.
 
2007-11-20 08:16:44 PM  
Isn't there another word we can use instead of douche? I just kinda feel that douche isn't strong enough to describe how much of a douche this douche is. If mathmatical symbols were a part of everyday english he'd be douche^(douche) but alas, they aren't. =(
 
2007-11-20 08:17:10 PM  
///yes, maybe 3 days of work
//but oh, so worth it...
 
2007-11-20 08:17:17 PM  
iodine
www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com needs to make an exception for JFP because he doesn't have a pic of himself with a hot chick, just a mannequin.

OH YEAH?

That's from when he was staying with Jessica Alba at the Holiday Inn:

www.clusterfake.de

www.clusterfake.de
 
2007-11-20 08:17:40 PM  
JSTACAT: mab1823: L.D. Ablo: This guy is viral marketing. I can't put my finger on it yet, but he is going to be pushing something.""

// not to worry he'd profit, don't he know the public always yanks out the dirty underware first...
\\ he could always pull the crying on u-toob stunt..

ye heard it here on Fark, first hehe
he will get tired of this long before the internet cookie monster does.


img211.imageshack.us

MSM WEDGIE!!!
 
2007-11-20 08:18:03 PM  
McEnroe My Childhood Nemesis: mab1823: I wish the ORIGINAL thread was still alive...it made it to about 600 posts before it was yanked...

It lives only as an unclickable link on my MyFark.

*sigh*

Seems to go that way with the truly Epic ones doesn't it?

If I remember right, that original thread was yanked cause he was threatening some sort of legal action. But if that was the case, why did JFP Epic Thread 2.0 survive?

/interesting


It was pulled b/c people were posting his private contact information. Since then, we've been pretty careful to just link to it. Like this (new window). =)
 
2007-11-20 08:19:50 PM  
GodLovesBeer: Tell me mab1823 isn't saying he benched 1100+ lbs.

No.

Though Mab is manly enough he probably could...

This douche said his triple lift total (squat, bench, deadlift) was 1,200. That's what we are referring to.
 
2007-11-20 08:21:12 PM  
Dude has met Curly Neal!

*bows deep*
 
2007-11-20 08:21:18 PM  
GodLovesBeer: McEnroe My Childhood Nemesis: mab1823: I was at the gym 26 minutes ago, and I only managed 1150 lbs. So I'm a little nervous.

Well, I am going to the gym in 26 minutes myself. Might just bench my convertible beemer right in the parking lot instead of actually going in, saves me some time in between being famous and being famous.


Tell me mab1823 isn't saying he benched 1100+ lbs.


No, he isn't saying that.

/he keeds
 
2007-11-20 08:21:30 PM  
GodLovesBeer: McEnroe My Childhood Nemesis: mab1823: I was at the gym 26 minutes ago, and I only managed 1150 lbs. So I'm a little nervous.

Well, I am going to the gym in 26 minutes myself. Might just bench my convertible beemer right in the parking lot instead of actually going in, saves me some time in between being famous and being famous.


Tell me mab1823 isn't saying he benched 1100+ lbs.


with his member.....he said.......yep I heard it
 
2007-11-20 08:21:38 PM  
He sounds like that guy on the office that cant stop telling people he went to Cornell.

"Oooh look at me I'm an Ivy League grad!"

The guy really is clueless. Oblivious. Lacking in any introspection or self reflection.

If he ever gets how stupid he is, he will claim it was all an act. A "character" he is working on.
 
2007-11-20 08:22:01 PM  
He is ugly and fat and he is losing his hair.

So there douchebag that is why the ladies don't want you.


The goggles they do nothing.
 
2007-11-20 08:22:37 PM  
GodLovesBeer: Whatever you do, John, don't kill yourself...THAT would be a tragedy, and then people would feel real sorry for bagging on you.

img187.imageshack.us


He'd get 26 minutes of silence in memorial...
 
2007-11-20 08:23:08 PM  
Empress of Blandings Castle: It was pulled b/c people were posting his private contact information.

I must have bailed out before it got out of hand. I don't remember that part. But hey, linking to things is almost as good right? Douchie McDouche
 
2007-11-20 08:23:41 PM  
hmmm.. masters, mensa, Ivy league, 31 story,gym 4x/week, etc, etc..self loving...can't get laid!!


//state univ., under 50k/yr, one story dwelling, never seen inside of a gym, 5'10"/165, medium IQ..gets laid every weekend!!
///just sayin'
//try a personality you douche!!!
 
2007-11-20 08:24:20 PM  
holeinmybucket = he lists as his Sports Accomplishments "... Golf(hole in one)...". He clearly is NOT a golfer. Any real golfer would list their handicap (if anything). Getting a hole in one has nothing to do with anything but basic skill...
-----------------------------------------------------------------
put-put golf that is--
 
2007-11-20 08:24:58 PM  
Why are we even still giving this tool attention? He's a bad person, everybody knows it. Let's not make him famous. The attention we're giving him now (yes, even the extremely negative) is probably giving him a boner right now.
 
2007-11-20 08:25:52 PM  
mab1823: The Voice of Doom

Perfection.


See? I told you it would all work out!
 
2007-11-20 08:26:18 PM  
this is an excellent oppty to use some psychological profil science
it is possible to determine many unspoken items in the words he made already. Make a dart and fly it, then listen for shrieks...
or gasps..
i already know he's got domination issues... thats why he fried when the lady wouldnt show him more pics...

\\ going on tv is really ask'n for a taz'n. Tv land plays dirty,
Fark would be a luv note compared to what tv can do...
so i call Masochist! seasoned with the taint
 
2007-11-20 08:26:39 PM  
He says that people he's gotten roles for have taken him off of their myspace friends lists. You think maybe he means rolls? I mean, I can see that happening. Being the multi-talented creature that he is I'm sure he's also been a waiter. I bet he's served lots of rolls. Not to be confused with roles. Although I'm at a loss as to why you'd add your waiter to your myspace friends in the first place, anyways...
 
2007-11-20 08:27:11 PM  
HMS_Blinkin: Why are we even still giving this tool attention? He's a bad person, everybody knows it. Let's not make him famous. The attention we're giving him now (yes, even the extremely negative) is probably giving him a boner right now better chance at landing acting roles.

We're playing right into his hands... :)
 
2007-11-20 08:27:52 PM  
HMS_Blinkin: Why are we even still giving this tool attention? He's a bad person, everybody knows it. Let's not make him famous. The attention we're giving him now (yes, even the extremely negative) is probably giving him a boner right now.

Because it gives me a boner.

This word "famous", I do not think it means what you think it means...
 
2007-11-20 08:27:56 PM  
Sorry folks--I'm with the girls that say this guy is not a douche. There is no way on this green planet that this asshat should be anywhere near or inside a pussy.

My vote goes to shiat sandwich.
 
2007-11-20 08:28:20 PM  
Hang On Voltaire: Yep. They must have frozen his "account"

http://www.hotornot.com/r/?eid=R8GRHL&key=ALW


FTFhotornot: "based on 1225 votes"

Ya think?


/Douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche
//Douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche dutch
///Douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche
 
2007-11-20 08:28:27 PM  
i34.photobucket.com
I regret having missed so much of this beautiful thread!
/Also ashamed at the lack of my skillz
 
2007-11-20 08:29:17 PM  
HMS_Blinkin: Why are we even still giving this tool attention? He's a bad person, everybody knows it. Let's not make him famous. The attention we're giving him now (yes, even the extremely negative) is probably giving him a boner right now.

Think of the Star Wars Kid. This is teh intarwebs. (and Fark) People gain fame for some of the wildest things...

/"hole in one" what?
//he's not talking about golf!
///soylent green is people
 
2007-11-20 08:29:53 PM  
Dont feed the troll!

/That is all.
 
2007-11-20 08:30:16 PM  
Hollywood Cole:

Holy fark! That exchange was amazing. Thanks for sharing!
 
2007-11-20 08:30:22 PM  
xalres: Douche DOUC-H-E DO:UC:HE PM: Douche douche douche douche, douche douche douche; douche douche douche. Douche douche douche douche douche douche, douche douche douche douche douche douche?

Douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche.

Douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche douche! Douche douche douche douche douche douche douche, douche douche douche!!!!

\douche douche douche douche
\\DOUCHE!


DOUCHE DOUCHE DOUCHE DOUCHE douche DoUcHe douchedouchedoucheDOUCHE, DOUCHE DOUCHE.

DOUCHEDOUCHE?
 
2007-11-20 08:30:51 PM  
thepostess: Sorry folks--I'm with the girls that say this guy is not a douche. There is no way on this green planet that this asshat should be anywhere near or inside a pussy.

My vote goes to shiat sandwich.


Good point, and douchley noted.
 
2007-11-20 08:31:22 PM  
By the way, can we get a douche count?
 
2007-11-20 08:33:15 PM  
Cat Wrangler: He says that people he's gotten roles for have taken him off of their myspace friends lists. You think maybe he means rolls? I mean, I can see that happening. Being the multi-talented creature that he is I'm sure he's also been a waiter. I bet he's served lots of rolls. Not to be confused with roles. Although I'm at a loss as to why you'd add your waiter to your myspace friends in the first place, anyways...

Well, that would explain why he has that dinner roll attached to his chin.
 
2007-11-20 08:33:16 PM  
People....People....This guy is out trolling with a lot of lines.
/he's tolling
//your biting
///I say cudo's to him
////well thought out
 
2007-11-20 08:33:21 PM  
Cat Wrangler 2007-11-20 08:26:39 PM
He says that people he's gotten roles for have taken him off of their myspace friends lists..""

// AaaHa!, wound depth is at least below fat layer, into a cavity..
i17.tinypic.com
 
2007-11-20 08:37:26 PM  
AlwaysRightBoy: People....People....This guy is out trolling with a lot of lines.
/he's tolling
//your biting
///I say cudo's to him
////well thought out



Well thought out? The only possible punchline is, "Hey, I'm not really a douche! PLEASE BELIEVE ME!"
 
2007-11-20 08:38:37 PM  
westbound pachyderm: mab1823: The Voice of Doom

Perfection.

See? I told you it would all work out!


Now if we can just get it airborne...
 
2007-11-20 08:39:10 PM  
This man is the standard against which all future generations of douche bags will judge themselves - the Stradivarius of douche bagidom.
 
2007-11-20 08:39:59 PM  
AlwaysRightBoy ::

bugs always think that in the jar, when pressed between the slides, nuther story.
// normally, easy to ignore, except this specimen has such a full closet... its worth an analysis
\\some very funny smelling stuff in there...i smell carney too

put that class in social psych to use :)
 
2007-11-20 08:40:37 PM  
Shame on you people using this thread to insult people other than this Atlanta Douche.

Although he is a bigger Douche than chimpy mcflightsuit and Guliani put together.
 
2007-11-20 08:40:49 PM  
AlwaysRightBoy: People....People....This guy is out trolling with a lot of lines.
/he's tolling
//your biting
///I say cudo's to him
////well thought out


A troll is a troll
And a roll is a roll.
And if we don't feed no trolls,
Then we'll have a surplus of rolls!
 
2007-11-20 08:41:44 PM  
img257.imageshack.us
 
2007-11-20 08:42:33 PM  
mab1823: AlwaysRightBoy: People....People....This guy is out trolling with a lot of lines.
/he's tolling
//your biting
///I say cudo's to him
////well thought out


Well thought out? The only possible punchline is, "Hey, I'm not really a douche! PLEASE BELIEVE ME!"


in this day and age....all it takes is a vag shot
/he'll get enough mileage from this
 
2007-11-20 08:42:39 PM  
mab1823:

Now if we can just get it airborne...


Now, THAT is gonna take some time.
You go to flamewar with the memes you HAVE,
Not the memes you WANT.
AND YOU'LL LIKE IT! =)
 
2007-11-20 08:42:40 PM  
That was best I could do on quick notice.
 
2007-11-20 08:43:39 PM  
EMPulse_of_KC: Err, who are the chicks in the last two pictures?
 
2007-11-20 08:46:49 PM  
VCH Quote 2007-11-20 05:34:56 PM
Hey, wait....I think I know whats going on here!

It's obvious...this whole thing is fake! eHarmony.com is staging the whole thing to make Match.com look bad!


Russ1642 Quote 2007-11-20 05:35:00 PM
tricycleracer: He's probably a Nickelback fan.

Last week I drove through their home-craptastic-town of Hanna, Alberta. There's a big sign as you enter the town saying, "Home of Nickelback". They left for a reason you tards.


You're a Mean Drunk R2D2 Quote 2007-11-20 05:35:19 PM
It's all fake. It's a setup up for a viral Massengill ad campaign.


I'm having some serious deja vu here

/what a douchenozzle
 
2007-11-20 08:46:58 PM  
This douche said his triple lift total (squat, bench, deadlift) was 1,200

100lbs. 12 times?
 
2007-11-20 08:47:34 PM  
JSTACAT: AlwaysRightBoy ::

bugs always think that in the jar, when pressed between the slides, nuther story.
// normally, easy to ignore, except this specimen has such a full closet... its worth an analysis
\\some very funny smelling stuff in there...i smell carney too

put that class in social psych to use :)


very good observation.......but I lost you when I was being buttered with your nuther butter
 
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