mamoru: babsw: Try fresh squeezed Lemon.....works on all those fishy things.

Farky'd and added to my mental notebook.

/hoping like crazy that I never repeat the experience

keeping good thoughts for ya.....

im14u2c: CityHall: My girlfriend keeps telling me I should do that but the logistics always end up seeming less appealing than coming inside her.

Two words: Titty fark.

/also works for a pearl necklace

Now this is something I have to try tonight. The woman I'm with has told me many times that she wants me to blast her. I fail to see why I would want to finish in my hand though rather than inside her.

Nestea Plunge:
Ever wonder what Andrea Dworkin looks like naked?

aaannnddd...I hate you

TextWh0re: DROxINxTHExWIND

I'm not one of the clowns who thinks that a woman can not experiment sexually or have one night stands. I think that a grown woman can do whatever she pleases, so I don't say this often but...

but this biatch is a WHORE.

Why? Because she does porn?

What does it matter? She's providing a service that has a high demand.


And hell, if it wasn't for all the "whores".. guys like you would NEVER get laid.

So, you should be thankful and singing her praises.
======================================================


LOL! Guys like me.

Oh, and the answer to your question is YES. Looks like somebody has a tape or two from college floating around the internet. Well, to answer your other question, yes, when you got farked in both ears while taking one in the mouth and one in the ass it DID make you a whore.

Don't insult me for my opinion. Just do you.

Bacterial vaginosis is one of those reasons you may want to pull out.

danlpoon: When you sleep with the same woman for years you just need a little variety.

Facial, Honey? Sure. Tie me up? Why not. Crap on the neighbors Honda? Let's go.

I thank you for this comment.

workplace LOLS!

Now I'm curious. Men on this thread appear to be in agreement that BV is disgusting. And yet the stereotype is that women smell fishy.

So are there actually chicks out there who naturally smell fishy? I mean, absent a bacterial infection? This strikes me as disgusting.

DROxINxTHExWIND

I'm assuming that you believe that a woman enjoying her sexuality.. is a bad, bad, nasty thing?

Poor boy..

Sorry to tell you.. but most of us girls prefer to have enjoyable sex.. in all it's varied forms, not some fat guy banging us walrus style while in the missionary position.

give me doughnuts
If you do get it in one of her eyes, just kick her in the shin real hard and call it "Pirate Sex!"

I think they can just shut the Internet down for the rest of the year and call it good. If it wasn't so dirty, that'd go straight in my Fark profile.

/I'll probably add it later

You'dnotcare

Women should not naturally smell fishy. The fishy smell is due to the fact that there are no longer any of the necessary bacteria that keep the vagina clean.

BV sucks, and nearly all women will have it at some point or another.. especially because a lot of guys have semen that upsets the vaginal PH to the point to where the necessary bacteria can no longer thrive.

Fishy vagina is a sick vagina.

I loved David Spermidine in "Kung Fu".

Mrs. Poon II smelled like brownies fresh from the oven.

You'dnotcare: Now I'm curious. Men on this thread appear to be in agreement that BV is disgusting. And yet the stereotype is that women smell fishy.

So are there actually chicks out there who naturally smell fishy? I mean, absent a bacterial infection? This strikes me as disgusting.

Most BV occurrences are asymptomatic. What happens is the good bacteria that makes the vagina slightly acidic is not as present as the bad bacteria that can make a woman smell fishy. It can be diet related especially if you don't eat a lot of dairy which contains acidophilus. It's basically the same thing with people who have too much bad bacteria in their stomachs and not enough of the good kind. So if you encounter a woman with this you should ask her kindly to go see a doctor or at the very least go eat a lot of yogurt.

I need to go home and get a nooner after this thread.

I have only applied one facial and it was awkward, having to hand finish for what seemed an eternity as my girl waited peaking every so often to see what the hold up was and then of course ...BLAM...straight into the eye.

I tried to keep from laughing - didn't know what to do until finally she says, "Don't just sit there, Can you get me a farkin towel or something?!"

once i told an ex of mine that i wanted her vag to look like a newborns.....she called my mother and told her i was pedo

I guess she's OK with Dick Cheese!

Tat'dGreaser
mamoru: As do I. Which is why I'm always happy to go down on a woman. :D

Tell me about it, I'm irate. Not only has it been like three weeks since I've had sex it's been even longer since a woman has let me go down on her. For some reason they just wanted to rush right into the sex part, I wanted to do a little foreplay. We didn't need it but that wasn't the point, I ENJOY it.

Um, how YOU doin'? The both of you.

And to answer your question: women hear all this shiat, practically from birth, about how our vaginas are dirty and smelly and gross, is it any wonder that we get a little insecure? I LOVE receiving oral, but even I've been known to push a partner's face away when I'm feeling paranoid.

brifar: once i told an ex of mine that i wanted her vag to look like a newborns.....she called my mother and told her i was pedo

Well, you kinda are.

TextWh0re: error4829: A turn off for me is a gal with a snatch large enough to fit your arm up, like most porn queens.

/just sayin...

Vagina is lined with muscles, tiddles.... If a woman uses those muscles, they actually become more tone.. not less.

Having a baby can stretch the muscles permanently.. resulting in a loss of tone...

However, lots of sex.. does not.

So, the porn star may actually be more taut than your average chick.. because the vaginal muscles get more of a work out.



This theory does not stand up to a real world penis.

takesdeepbreathkickspuppy: When the critical moment arrives I often like to race out the back door and jack it into my neighbor's BBQ grill. This usually requires the wearing of tennis shoes or rubber boots when it is snowing.

LOL

Any guy can say he loves to give oral to the vagina, but unless he knows the territory, it's just a lot of slurping with no payoff.

You'dnotcare: Now I'm curious. Men on this thread appear to be in agreement that BV is disgusting. And yet the stereotype is that women smell fishy.

So are there actually chicks out there who naturally smell fishy? I mean, absent a bacterial infection? This strikes me as disgusting.


a friend of mine was on his way down on a girl, got close to her crotch, and stopped dead in his tracks. he said the smell was horrific.

so he stuck a finger in her, got it nice and juicy, then stood up, wiped it on her upper lip, and told her to take a farking shower.

no it isn't normal. yes it is disgusting. yes you can do mean yet hilarious things in that situation.

overlord_mike wins the thread.

charlatan brown

I said a woman that uses the muscles..

The average, American, woman doesn't know how to have good sex, and they never really learn. They don't do kegels, and they don't use those muscles during sex. They kinda think of the vagina as just a hole, and don't seem to realize that it's lined with muscles. They don't use them.
So, those muscles atrophy..

Heck, most women can't even name all the parts of their vagina..

Find a woman that works those muscles.. and she could have had sex with five hundred men, and you wouldn't know.
Heck, she could prolly internally massage you to the end.

Nestea Plunge: Any guy can say he loves to give oral to the vagina, but unless he knows the territory, it's just a lot of slurping with no payoff.

It really isn't that complicated a terrain to figure out. You just need a gal who isn't ashamed to tell you what she likes, since each gal's a little bit different.

Nestea Plunge: Any guy can say he loves to give oral to the vagina, but unless he knows the territory, it's just a lot of slurping with no payoff.

Technique can be taught. Enthusiasm can't.

DROxINxTHExWIND: I'm not one of the clowns who thinks that a woman can not experiment sexually or have one night stands. I think that a grown woman can do whatever she pleases, so I don't say this often but...

but this biatch is a WHORE.

She's not African-American Dro, so why do you care?

Just kidding, you know, because someone suggested (incorrectly) yesterday that you only comment in Afram threads.

my girl told me the other day that she wasn't sure she was getting all out of oral that she could... not due to lack of technique or enthusiasm, but just because she was always too embarassed to point me to her particular preferences.

i just told her that is something we are going to have to work on. over and over.

there is no better place in life to be a perfectionist.

I've learned to not dwell on women with sexual hang ups re: cunnilingus. They want to deny themselves the pleasure, so what, move on to the next woman. Go where your efforts are appreciated.

Tat'dGreaser-I've never been with a woman that smelled like a fish. I actually like the smell. A buddy of mine did sleep with a girl that he had to burn his sheets afterwards. It was a mistake to tell all his friends this, we're not gentle.

Tat? I take it your used to bringing tears to a woman's eyes?

/goddammit

Brightflowermaid: drink copious amounts of Red Bull so it tastes like sugar

*scribbling notes madly

Please, go on...

this thread needs more pics of the porn-chick.

techmom: You mean, coherently??

I'm not ashamed to admit that if you're nuzzling the good parts, my heels would be beating a tattoo on your back while I yodel like a coyote. If you can't understand those cues...

The cues for "oh God yes" are easy.

My point was more that if it's not quite right, you gals need to step up and tell us what you'd rather have us do. Every one of you likes it their own way, and we can't read minds. Lying there like a cold fish and then sighing and saying "let's just do it already" doesn't help anything.

Nestea Plunge: I've learned to not dwell on women with sexual hang ups re: cunnilingus. They want to deny themselves the pleasure, so what, move on to the next woman. Go where your efforts are appreciated.

I've known some very liberated women who had hangups in that area. But they more than made up for it in other areas. You could be missing out.