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(Salon)   Forget CleanFlicks. Here's a company that *adds* boobies, profanity and extreme violence to your movies   (salon.com) divider line 60
    More: Spiffy  
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17627 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Oct 2002 at 8:35 PM (11 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



60 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2002-10-01 05:05:31 PM
I know this is satire, but the dude's name is Rod Cumming for crying out loud!
 
2002-10-01 05:51:24 PM
I always wanted to see Dick Van Dyke give Mary Poppins a little chitty chitty bang bang.
 
2002-10-01 05:52:54 PM
best. idea. ever.
 
2002-10-01 06:05:59 PM
Darn Spiffy tag threw me off, took me all of ten seconds to realize this was satire. Rod Cumming indeed....
 
2002-10-01 07:59:29 PM
I can't wait to see what they do with the new VeggieTales movie.
 
2002-10-01 08:08:41 PM
In the time honored tradition of Fark, I did not read the article. But if they can offer me that, I'm in.
 
2002-10-01 08:39:35 PM
The Sound of Music - 'Special' Edition ??
 
2002-10-01 08:40:15 PM
That's a pretty sweet religion he's suffering through...
 
2002-10-01 08:40:43 PM
 
2002-10-01 08:41:24 PM
Obvious satire. But it'd be nice if someone did this. Just like I want to see what the response would be if Satanists visited Mormons to pass out religious texts.

I like turning situations around to give the other side a taste of their own philosophies.
 
2002-10-01 08:42:00 PM
Cumming claims that God commanded him to provide this service last week as he was praying for "the greater enlargement of all"

Pun overload! Somebody call The Sun!
 
2002-10-01 08:46:26 PM
The officer pleaded with the boy to give grandmother's plum dumplings (Zwetschkenknoedel) another chance.

Ewwwww, I thought that sort of think only happened in the Nashville area. Ick.


(FOr the record my corporate overlords have moved me from Sunny Hollywood Fl, to Nashville Tn.)
 
2002-10-01 08:48:13 PM
Perhaps the movie that needs this most is "Bring it on."

Mmmm... Kirsten and Eliza...
 
2002-10-01 08:48:20 PM
shiat, posted in the wrong thread.


Ugh.
 
2002-10-01 08:48:37 PM
Um, Irascible, I believe you are in the wrong Comment Thingee. Thanks! Rock on. Down with the corporate overlords.
 
2002-10-01 08:48:39 PM
Forget tobey! What about me and kristen dunst? Now that's a good idea!
 
2002-10-01 08:49:33 PM
I need to see movies with more Zwetschkenknoedel.
 
2002-10-01 08:50:26 PM
always thought Thelma and Louise could have done with a messier ending
 
2002-10-01 08:50:43 PM
"Rod Cumming, 34, president of FilthyFlicks Ltd."

What other kind of business could you get into with a name like that?
 
2002-10-01 08:51:55 PM
CAP surrenders
 
2002-10-01 08:52:49 PM
Obvious satire. But it'd be nice if someone did this. Just like I want to see what the response would be if Satanists visited Mormons to pass out religious texts.

Would they have little magazines like The Burning Pits of Hell instead of Lighthouse? Articles such as "Making the Most of the Money You Are Embezzling" and "Everything You Wanted to Know about Beastiality." And, of course, "How to get an Account on Fark.com."

/simmering in hell with a light white wine sauce
 
2002-10-01 08:55:18 PM
if only this were real. i'd join his church.
 
2002-10-01 08:55:27 PM
Amen, Dr.Fey, amen. That movie is still almost worth killing a kitten or two over, even without some good ol' nudity and sex.
 
2002-10-01 09:04:40 PM
does this remind anyone else of that "Critic" episode, where Duke decides to change all the endings of the old movies?
 
2002-10-01 09:07:07 PM
On a related subject, it occurred to me the other day that I would like to put together a site similar to the CAP site. My site would warn viewers about films with cheesy endings where good wins through unrealistically. It would list films with old fashioned gender roles, blind subservience to authority and films where the love-at-first-sight heterosexual couple live happily ever after. That way, parents would know to discuss these issues with their kids and prepare them adequately to deal with the modern world. Having said that I don't have kids and would probably feel differently if I did.

I don't know about anyone else but I would love to see an adult version of the A-Team. That would kick ass.
 
2002-10-01 09:17:19 PM
Bring It On. Definately Bring It On.

Protect your kittens gang.
 
2002-10-01 09:22:07 PM
this is one of the greatest ideas ever. more banging of the beaver. i surrender. this is gonna kick arse.
 
2002-10-01 09:26:38 PM
Two words: Jessica Rabbit!!
 
2002-10-01 09:28:47 PM
what this is satire?
CRAP i thought it was real... :(
 
2002-10-01 09:42:37 PM
me too, I was looking for the web site address with my credit card in hand and a copy of True Romance *sobs*
 
2002-10-01 09:43:07 PM
Now HERE is what we need to put a little UUMPH into the Star Trek Franchise! How about Asia Carrera down in the transporter room? Or the holodeck? She's a geek, she'd probably be right at home...
 
2002-10-01 09:49:25 PM
damn, i was going to say something good about it but someone forgot that fark has a special tag for these, img src="http://img.fark.com/images/satire.gif">
 
2002-10-01 09:50:03 PM
i hate html
 
2002-10-01 09:52:48 PM
Dr. Fey: A guy I know once joked that he had to watch Bring It On a couple of times to be sure that he didn't just fall asleep or something and miss the part where there's boobies.
 
2002-10-01 09:53:03 PM
 
2002-10-01 09:53:11 PM
Now HERE is what we need to put a little UUMPH into the Star Trek Franchise!

MmmMmmmmm Marina Sirtis and Gates McFadden in lesbian sonic-shower action. Mmmmmm.

Jeri Ryan and Roxanne Dawson in a holodeck Greece. With grapes. And me. Mmmmmmmm.
 
2002-10-01 09:56:21 PM
Angry_Samoan: Yes.
 
2002-10-01 10:00:19 PM
I want to see Star Wars ep 2, but with Natalie Portman naked throughout the movie...
 
2002-10-01 10:10:16 PM
rofl b0rg, guess where that cucumber's going!
 
2002-10-01 10:14:25 PM
Yeah, ScudEast, the T&A team! (actually an old MST3K joke)
 
2002-10-01 10:21:43 PM
Interesting... Then, maybe i could find out exactly what a "Nudie Booth" looks like.
 
2002-10-01 10:24:41 PM
Damn... and I was so looking forward to that. That satire is so unsubtle it even took the fun out of the very idea.
 
2002-10-01 10:26:30 PM
A nudie booth? yuck... if you think it's disgusting when your foot sticks to the floor in a regular movie theater because of spilt snacks, imagine having the same experience in one of those... ewwwwww!
 
2002-10-01 10:32:39 PM
Clevershark: They have people called Jizz-Moppers come in and clean it up. Practically every guy does it on the windows, and cum leaves streaks if you don't clean it properly.
 
2002-10-01 10:56:24 PM
It even says satire in the web address. Someone put on the wrong tag. Got my hopes up for a minute.
 
2002-10-01 11:00:26 PM
Thirty-seven?!
 
2002-10-01 11:03:29 PM
That's why you need to do something rewarding with your life. I manually masturbate caged animals for artificial insemination.
 
2002-10-01 11:12:42 PM
^^^
(Clerks reference)
 
2002-10-01 11:14:56 PM
Did anyone notice that when Dante and Randal are discussing Jizz-Moppers, the customer in the store is buying Windex and Paper Towels?
 
2002-10-01 11:17:13 PM
I can just see "Remains of the Day"
Emma Thompson getting the bottom knocked out of her by Anthony Hopkins.

And then they'd have to change the title of another classic:

On Golden Fonda.
 
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