WOW this is OLD...i read this MONTHS ago.

if not a year ago!

groan

That shiat's bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

This article is clearly a slip and fall accident waiting to happen.

fatal_exception: That shiat's bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

+1 XD

schief2: Booo puns!

Hooray beer!

May I please have your pants?

/best commercial ever

Prosecutors said Chiquita also made payments to Colombia's main left-wing rebel group, the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia (Farc).

So Carl Lindner Jr. paid money to Farc? What's his Total-Farc login, I wonder?

/unless you are from Cincinnati, that might not have been funny
//well, it probably wasn't funny anyway

ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring ring

Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia (Farc)

/Fark? we has terrorists?

What an inflamatory headline... (the article) If they had put "...Colombian terrorists", nobody would bother reading it. I hate that kinda crap...

so next time the paramilitaries will ask for more money, i mean if 1.2million costs 25 million in summary judgements, then up the ante?

They must be bananas to do that ...

fatal_exception: That shiat's bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

I don't know what a Hollaback girl is. All I know is that I want her dead. - Brian Griffin

obligatory

He kind of looks like a terrorist, too.

themishkin: What an inflamatory headline... (the article) If they had put "...Colombian terrorists", nobody would bother reading it. I hate that kinda crap...

Seriously. They only kill Columbians, after all.

I'm confused: a banana company is being held responsible for arming a South American terror group, yet Oliver North continues to walk free.

/Reagan, not so much.
//Flame on!

wanted for questioning

oh my...that was extraordinarly bad...

Bananas, the Atheist's Nightmare

Chiquita holds a press conference regarding these insidious lies.

Link

Chiquita Banana's still taste better than those freakin' Del Monte banana's.

And I think the stickers have acid on them.

My sister and I would fight like ravenous dogs to get the banana with the sticker on it.

Banana company Chiquita fined find $25m for funding terrorists, will plan to a peel

/FTFY
//Sorry, pet peeve
///rotsky

NSFW (new window)

O'Doyle RULES!

gorgor: NSFW (new window)

wrong wrong wrong a thousand times WRONG.

/no more nanners on mah cornflakes after that

I knew before I clicked the link that this story would originate from the US.

Here's our side:

They're terrorists! They stole our land that we owned and chased us away with guns. I bought that land with my own money. Federal Government, won't you help me? I donated to your campaign last year.. there ought to be some strings I can pull here.

Their side:

The Americans bribe our US-backed figurehead politicians for special treatment buy all our land up cheap, don't pay the workers any decent pay, ruin our country and exploit it for cheap goods, and we're not going to take this corruption and bullshiat anymore.


Then we label them terrorists! See?

Banana company Chiquita fined $25m for funding terrorists, will plan to a peel

This could be a slippery slope.

Boy that really sucks for Chiquita. They had to chose between paying "protection" money to ACU and Farc and then get fined by the US for dealing with terrorist. Or not pay the them and face possible deadly consequences for it's employees in Columbia.

Total Kobayashi Maru

Subby -1

/Obvious tag for headline, not article.

Cerebral Ballsy: Their side:

The Americans bribe our US-backed figurehead politicians for special treatment buy all our land up cheap, don't pay the workers any decent pay, ruin our country and exploit it for cheap goods.

Profit?

BTW, that's my kneejerk reaction. I didn't RTFA.

dustygrimp: Cerebral Ballsy: Their side:

The Americans bribe our US-backed figurehead politicians for special treatment buy all our land up cheap, don't pay the workers any decent pay, ruin our country and exploit it for cheap goods.

Profit?

Well, that's how we usually do business in developing or undeveloped countries.

Cerebral Ballsy: BTW, that's my kneejerk reaction. I didn't RTFA.

And yet, you were so accurate!

/Eats Dole bananas

I didn't read the article...the headline cracked me up more than enough. Good stuff.

Cerebral Ballsy: Well, that's how we usually do business in developing or undeveloped countries.

You're OK with wars against a country's own people so some stupid fruit company can keep getting stinking rich?

Chiquitita, tell me what's wrong.

Correct me if I'm wrong/remembering incorrectly, but my Latin American history professor basically said if you didn't pay those people protection money you don't grow crops there. And they'll make sure of it.

/not that I'm condoning the action
//just interesting to me

How much will they fine Cheney for funding Fatah al-Islam?

Bootysama: Correct me if I'm wrong/remembering incorrectly, but my Latin American history professor basically said if you didn't pay those people protection money you don't grow crops there. And they'll make sure of it.

Over here we call it "taxes". The difference is our guys wear suits, but the end result is the same.

factoryconnection
I must have missed that one.
/but I'm sure that's a good thing :)

Oznog: Bootysama: Correct me if I'm wrong/remembering incorrectly, but my Latin American history professor basically said if you didn't pay those people protection money you don't grow crops there. And they'll make sure of it.

Over here we call it "taxes". The difference is our guys wear suits, but the end result is the same.

This

What is this bad-pun day??

whidbey: Cerebral Ballsy: Well, that's how we usually do business in developing or undeveloped countries.

You're OK with wars against a country's own people so some stupid fruit company can keep getting stinking rich?

Wait.. what? I never said I was OK with anything. I just said that's our usual MO, especially in Latin America.

Oznog

Over here we call it "taxes". The difference is our guys wear suits, but the end result is the same.

No, the difference is that your guys are ultimately answerable to the democratic process.

(Well, not so much if you live in the USA).

Cerebral Ballsy: I knew before I clicked the link that this story would originate from the US.

Here's our side:

They're terrorists! They stole our land that we owned and chased us away with guns. I bought that land with my own money. Federal Government, won't you help me? I donated to your campaign last year.. there ought to be some strings I can pull here.

Their side:

The Americans bribe our US-backed figurehead politicians for special treatment buy all our land up cheap, don't pay the workers any decent pay, ruin our country and exploit it for cheap goods, and we're not going to take this corruption and bullshiat anymore.

Then we label them terrorists! See?

The EU has them labeled as terrorists too.

squidloe: Banana company Chiquita fined find $25m for funding terrorists, will plan to a peel

ummm...a fine of $25 million was levied against them so the terminology was correct before you "fixed" it.

Terrorists= An army on a tight budget.

Cerebral Ballsy
Terrorists= An army on a tight budget.

or...
Terrorists = the smaller of the two fighting factions
or...
Terrorists = the side that is currently losing.

Cerebral Ballsy: Wait.. what? I never said I was OK with anything. I just said that's our usual MO, especially in Latin America.

And that doesn't outrage you?

whidbey: Cerebral Ballsy: Wait.. what? I never said I was OK with anything. I just said that's our usual MO, especially in Latin America.

And that doesn't outrage you?


Of course it does, but I'm busy here.

_{/trying to pay my rent.}

Slut

Chiquita paid Colombian terrorists? Are they sure? I didn't think that they were Moozlim Ayrabs in Colombia.

Banana company Chiquita fined find $25m for funding terrorists, will plan to a peel peal

rotskyed for accuracy

macdaddy357
Chiquita paid Colombian terrorists? Are they sure? I didn't think that they were Moozlim Ayrabs in Colombia.

Colombians were practicing terrorism before it was popular.

The USA didn't send in these guys for Chiquita?

damn bananas

Whidbey If I seem flippant, it's because we've been playing our current game for 100 years.. The game I call "Just shy of Imperialism". Before we played that game, the game was called "Colonialism", before that, "Exploration: Discovering land someone else already inhabits" and before that, "Expansionism". The powerful have been trampling on the weak forever, and it'll continue long after I die.

remember the Contra? wasn't just a videogame

/queue the dorks with their up up down down shenanigans
//had to rotsky

Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Right B A start.

Banana Split? (new window)

Bootysama said: Correct me if I'm wrong/remembering incorrectly, but my Latin American history professor basically said if you didn't pay those people protection money you don't grow crops there. And they'll make sure of it.

Osnog said: Over here we call it "taxes". The difference is our guys wear suits, but the end result is the same.

I say: When we pay protection to non-government entities, that's called Insurance.

I'd be more concerned about how much power this group (terrorist or not) has in Columbia.

gorgor, we're not gonna fall for a banana in the tail pipe.

spleef420,

You've just been ROTSKIED.

Jim, tell him what he's one.

/I love new fark cliches

squidloe: You've just been ROTSKIED

I think you mean "rotsky'd"

/boy howdy am I glad I missed the birth of this one.

I really have no problem with this at all. Just good business.

What? No Chiquita dogs?!

Cerebalballsy

See the book: Confessions of an economic hit man

Very good read talking all about that.

Cerebral Ballsy: The powerful have been trampling on the weak forever, and it'll continue long after I die.

Well, then I guess the best thing I could hope for is a war against the United States to stop us, if anything to make you think twice about condoning such evil again. IN our lifetimes.

You do realize that's what's coming?

A war against the US to get us to stop our bullsh*t.

This is a wonderful example of the naivete inherent in much of the thinking in the USA. Had they not bought off the geurillas they would have had a lot of dead employees. So the options are 1. don't pay the local militias and stock up on body bags 2. pay the geurillas and get fined by some judge.

Farking Sweet: Cerebalballsy

See the book: Confessions of an economic hit man

Very good read talking all about that.

I've read it.. it was a good book.

whidbey: Cerebral Ballsy: The powerful have been trampling on the weak forever, and it'll continue long after I die.

Well, then I guess the best thing I could hope for is a war against the United States to stop us, if anything to make you think twice about condoning such evil again. IN our lifetimes.

You do realize that's what's coming?

A war against the US to get us to stop our bullsh*t.

In their dreams. Once they go to war with us, provided they win, China will come and rape all of the Western Hemisphere. They've got millions of woman-less men ready to join their army.

It will never end. We always make sure we don't go too far so we can pretend we're the nice guys.

Cerebral Ballsy: It will never end. We always make sure we don't go too far so we can pretend we're the nice guys.

With an attitude like that, you might as well join them, CB.

Seriously.

I should clarify: It will never end means the slavery of the weak to the strong will never end.. only the players change. Players could even flip sides.. winners could become losers.. and the new winners will exploit the new losers. It will never end.. it's like the plot of "Animal Farm" just reapeats itself al throughout history and we never seem to learn to cooperate.

As for the next sentence, that was supposed to be a new paragraph.

whidbey: Cerebral Ballsy: It will never end. We always make sure we don't go too far so we can pretend we're the nice guys.

With an attitude like that, you might as well join them, CB.

Seriously.

Why? They're no better than us. They'd do the same in our position. All I can figure is this ugliness seems to be the nature of the animal.

spleef420,

Son, I was in that thread. A lot of good men and women were in that thread with me. Both usages are correct and acceptable.

/Rotsky. The other white meet.

Cerebral Ballsy: Why? They're no better than us. They'd do the same in our position. All I can figure is this ugliness seems to be the nature of the animal.

Who would? The people we're oppressing by proxy?

Like I said, what's going to eventually happen is a World War against US.

China might well lead the charge.

At any rate, your smug lack of morals or concern for injustice is despicable.

Nolondil: This is a wonderful example of the naivete inherent in much of the thinking in the USA. Had they not bought off the geurillas they would have had a lot of dead employees. So the options are 1. don't pay the local militias and stock up on body bags 2. pay the geurillas and get fined by some judge.


agreed. The company was damned if they do, damned if they don't. When people with guns show up and threaten your workeds, and the government ether can't or won't stop them, you do what you have to do to avoid bloodshed.

whidbey: Cerebral Ballsy: Why? They're no better than us. They'd do the same in our position. All I can figure is this ugliness seems to be the nature of the animal.

Who would? The people we're oppressing by proxy?

Like I said, what's going to eventually happen is a World War against US.

China might well lead the charge.

At any rate, your smug lack of morals or concern for injustice is despicable.

I don't see how you mean? I'm saying why should I join rebel forces.. they'd do the same if they were in power. Who hasn't throughout history, taken advantage of their power? I'm not saying it's right.. I'm saying power corrupts. We're in the position of being on top right now, and we do some really horrible stuff. Our politicians go on TV and lie to our public and pretend we're the nice guys and we never did anything to justify how other people treat us (i.e. we'll label anyone who stands up to us militarily as "evil").

For example, when the French did not back us going in to Iraq, they were vilified in our press. How dare they disagree with us! We're the "good guys"! Americans are quick to go to war and slow to research why a group might expend so much effort to attack us in the first place. They'd rather believe that other people "hate our freedom" than do any research into the history of our Foreign Relations and how we treat other cultures and countries.

I've studied it and studied it. I can't find a way out of the mess of greed and suppression.

As far as our forgeign relations, we take advantage of almost everyone we come across. Yet, I cannot find any other great civilations that haven't done the same... it's like the cycle of greed never ends. I see no hope for humanity... maybe for esome individual humans.. there are good people, but it seems they aren't the ones running the country.

I know I've got a dim view, but I just can't see it any other way.. I'm trying I swear. I definitely don't condone greed and corruption, I just see no end to it.

They paid many times more to the US Government than the Colombians and they didn't even get the protection.

Korovyov: Nolondil --
Somewhat more than that. Other options include --

- lobby own government to attempt to change law
- lobby own government to lean on/assist the local government to be more aggressive
- not doing business in areas heavily influenced by paramilitary extortionists

You're asking American business people to morally decide who they do business with?

That ties it!

Me and my girl will play with cucumbers from here on...

Cerebral Ballsy: I've studied it and studied it. I can't find a way out of the mess of greed and suppression.

It sure doesn't help anything by throwing up your hands and accepting it.

My take on it is that the more that people KNOW about what we've done, the more likely that the outrage will be too deafening to ignore.

As far as our forgeign relations, we take advantage of almost everyone we come across. Yet, I cannot find any other great civilations that haven't done the same... it's like the cycle of greed never ends. I see no hope for humanity... maybe for esome individual humans.. there are good people, but it seems they aren't the ones running the country.

Just keep in mind that no country previous to this one has come up with a government truly meant for the people. None.

Even the warmongers and the corporatists have to follow the Constitution. And when we the people turn a blind eye to abuse and injustice, we're only hurting ourselves.

Also keep in mind that the abusers want us to be apathetic, they WANT us to believe we can't make a difference, that we should just STFU, GBTW and pay the rent...:)

Food for thought.

A Chiquita banana makes a great meal
There are many fun things under the peal
There are vitamins and minerals in every bite
and best of all they have the taste you like!
Chiquitas are delicous, and they're very nutritious...


/Obscure?
//I think you have to be from CT or NY

GBmanNC: A Chiquita banana makes a great meal
There are many fun things under the peal
There are vitamins and minerals in every bite
and best of all they have the taste you like!
Chiquitas are delicous, and they're very nutritious...


/Obscure?
//I think you have to be from CT or NY

Yeah, because there was no such thing as "national television" back in the days of yore..

themishkin: I hate that kinda crap...

Why's that? Do you think people only care about al-Qaeda? You're wrong.
Though this story really is only a follow-up.

NuckleheadEd: GBmanNC: A Chiquita banana makes a great meal
There are many fun things under the peal
There are vitamins and minerals in every bite
and best of all they have the taste you like!
Chiquitas are delicous, and they're very nutritious...


/Obscure?
//I think you have to be from CT or NY

Yeah, because there was no such thing as "national television" back in the days of yore..

Huh? I was talking about the grocery store Stew Leonards. They have a giant banana that sings the song above the banana stand. I guess Im too young to know it was a commercial jingle.

GBmanNC: They have a giant banana that sings the song above the banana stand.

Sounds like somebody had a few too many martoonis, I'm outta my NUT, baby...

whidbey I know.. it's just a feeling of hopelessness I get sometimes.. this is probably the subject I wrap my brain around the most. What to do? My biggest fear is no one really cares at all. I battle my own parents on this topic. (Ex-military Gung Ho types). At least I've won over the majority of my siblings!

theflatline: That being said, although I am US born and bred, I am going to retitre there. hot chicks, easy life and good people.

Yeah well, you'd better hope the year you decide to retire you don't step into a bloodbath.

Cerebral Ballsy: My biggest fear is no one really cares at all. I battle my own parents on this topic. (Ex-military Gung Ho types). At least I've won over the majority of my siblings!

Small victories, man. One thing at a time. At least you've got your own head together on this.

I have tossed around the idea of activist art.

VIVA EL SNORKY!

(Joins in the collective groan)

Love the emma peel....in her youth grrrrr!

The US government has more raw power than Farc, therefore we shook down $25M while they could only steal $1.7M.

1. It's good to be on the strongest team.
2. There is no moral distinction between big gubment and organized crime.

Both grab all they can whenever they can from whomever they can.



/and Jesus wept.

FARCing bananas.

BeowulfSmith:
/unless you are from Cincinnati, that might not have been funny
//well, it probably wasn't funny anyway

i'm from cincinnati, and it was merely slightly amusing ;)

1996 called, it wants it's stories back

/get out much subby?