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(CNN)   Helmsley's cemetery won't let the biatch be buried there   (cnn.com) divider line 99
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21007 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Sep 2007 at 1:25 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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Diogenes [TotalFark]
2007-09-05 01:18:17 PM
The housekeeper, Zamfira Sfara, 48, had sued her employer in 2004 over one of those bites, but lost the case when a judge ruled Helmsley was protected from liability under the Workers Compensation Law.

Sfara's son, Remus Pop, told The New York Times this week that his mother was asking lawyers to look at going after Trouble's inheritance.

"That is the next step," Pop told the Times. "That dog got money. That money is going to be taken away from that dog."

Zamfira, Master of the Law Suit
 
nobozo
2007-09-05 01:23:53 PM
www.cinemablend.com

Trouble is welcome here.
 
unremarkable asterisk [TotalFark]
2007-09-05 01:28:35 PM
I'm selling my house. I'm willing to bury her upside down in my front yard for good luck.
 
Chiggity Chza
2007-09-05 01:29:34 PM
Good the biatch doesn't deserve to be buried. Leave her sit longer than Anna Nicole
 
k4mi
2007-09-05 01:29:51 PM
Awsome headline.

Mine was:
"Helmsley's dog finds out what it's like when the only thing people want is the biatch's money"

but you beat me to the linky!

GG sir.
 
Chiggity Chza
2007-09-05 01:31:10 PM
Helmsley's former housekeeper claims the dog bit her numerous times during her three-month job with the hotel queen, and now she wants a bite of that money.

What CNN getting fark writers? That is punny
 
Bloody William
2007-09-05 01:31:12 PM
+1

Diogenes: Zamfira, Master of the Law Suit

+2, mega combo!
 
improvius
2007-09-05 01:31:22 PM
Did anyone else read "buried" as "burned" at first glance?
 
ultraholland
2007-09-05 01:31:53 PM
Just wanted to say that I did not submit this with a funnier headline. In fact, I didn't submit a thing.
 
Kuta
2007-09-05 01:31:57 PM
Looks like a job for Ron Mexico.
 
clippedwing
2007-09-05 01:32:10 PM
Oh the troubles of the rich.
 
Snivelly
2007-09-05 01:32:34 PM
The cemetery says state law forbids animal remains to be buried in human graveyards.

Why not, are they worried about infections or something? Or is there a threat of dog zombies I don't know about?
 
offacue
2007-09-05 01:32:39 PM
Let me get this straight. The mansion is occupied by "staffers" who take care of the dog. Do they need help, I'd gladly look after the cute little puntable pup whilst living in a 28 room mansion.

/What's in the fridge?
//Where's the liquor cabinet?
//Is the pool warm?
 
sparkyumr98
2007-09-05 01:33:19 PM
Kuta: Looks like a job for Ron Mexico Remus Pop.

FTFY.
 
Caesar1313
2007-09-05 01:33:45 PM
$12 Million to a farking dog.... I would pay money to hit this women upside the head with a shovel on her last day.... Forget donating the money to the poor or some other worthy cause instead pamper my shiat-rat so my sick and twisted legacy will haunt the world of the living well beyond the expiry date of my flesh.
 
baby_hewey
2007-09-05 01:33:58 PM
improvius 2007-09-05 01:31:22 PM
Did anyone else read "buried" as "burned" at first glance?

No, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night!
 
guesser
2007-09-05 01:34:28 PM
Great headline, but I'm surprised the biatch didn't know that dogs weren't allowed.
 
SchlingFo
2007-09-05 01:34:53 PM
Chiggity Chza: Good the biatch doesn't deserve to be buried. Leave her sit longer than Anna Nicole

Who else is going to post without reading the article? ;)
 
JohnBigBootay
2007-09-05 01:35:07 PM
She resides at the left hand of Satan. But the housekeeper sounds like an even bigger piece of shiat.
 
AXESMI
2007-09-05 01:35:16 PM
Chiggity Chza Quote 2007-09-05 01:29:34 PM
Good the biatch doesn't deserve to be buried. Leave her sit longer than Anna Nicole


The Biatch they were referring to is the Dog.
 
NineInchNader
2007-09-05 01:35:44 PM
The cemetery says state law forbids animal remains to be buried in human graveyards.

Why not, are they worried about infections or something? Or is there a threat of dog zombies I don't know about?

It's about maintaining the sanctity and dignity of human remains. After all, I can't stand dogs when I can shut my doors on them. I don't even want to think about being buried next to one of the yappy fukcers for the rest of eternity.
 
Jimmy's Neutrons
2007-09-05 01:36:32 PM
offacue:

Yeah I was thinking the same thing. What a sweet gig those staffers have. Kick the pooch out of the house in the morning, party all day (and maybe clean a little). The sun gos down, you let the little dustmop in, throw some kibble at it and continue partying. Hell with the size of the estate, they don't even have to clean up the shiate from poochy.

Trouble is no trouble at all!
 
baltimoreblonde
2007-09-05 01:36:52 PM
She did leave a shiatload of money to charity. I think the foundation is 7th, on the same list as the Gates' charity. The mutt just got a little bite of it. And now it seems little poochy is likely to be out some bucks.
 
MadAsshatter
2007-09-05 01:37:13 PM
What a clusterfark of douchebaggery this is. Helmsley herself was a douche, her brother who was left $15 million won't even take care of her dog, and her money grubbing housekeeper is out for the dog's money. Nuke from orbit.
 
Cerebral Ballsy
2007-09-05 01:37:17 PM
Great headline.
 
Chiggity Chza
2007-09-05 01:37:19 PM
SchlingFo

damn it, was hoping no one would notice my tomfoolery
 
ipsofacto
2007-09-05 01:37:21 PM
Caesar1313: Forget donating the money to the poor or some other worthy cause instead pamper my shiat-rat so my sick and twisted legacy will haunt the world of the living well beyond the expiry date of my flesh.

Word.

//It's the old This.
 
HelloMyNameIs
2007-09-05 01:38:16 PM
I just came here to say biatch. Biatch, biatch, biatch.
 
SchlingFo
2007-09-05 01:39:08 PM
Chiggity Chza: damn it, was hoping no one would notice my tomfoolery

Dude, I knew it would catch at least one person :)
 
Cerebral Ballsy
2007-09-05 01:39:40 PM
MadAsshatter: What a clusterfark of douchebaggery this is. Helmsley herself was a douche, her brother who was left $15 million won't even take care of her dog, and her money grubbing housekeeper is out for the dog's money. Nuke from orbit.

If your brother won't take care of your dog after you die, you probably treated him like shiat and deserve what you get. Also; if the dog's a biter, put it down or give it to the pound.
 
Chiggity Chza
2007-09-05 01:40:04 PM
SchlingFo

The thread is still young
 
Gawdzila
2007-09-05 01:40:47 PM
It's only too bad that it's too late to disappoint that hag with the news. I think it's even funnier that her brother doesn't want to take care of the dog, and funniest that someone is going to take that dog's money away.

That's what you get for being a complete douche, but I guess her cold rotten corpse will never know the difference.
 
Chiggity Chza
2007-09-05 01:41:06 PM
Cerebral Ballsy

Or give it to a Chinese restaurant, they like dog
 
Apparent Nuisance
2007-09-05 01:41:27 PM
In that picture, she looks as if just (a little more) makeup, and she would be a dead ringer for The Joker. What happened to her cheeks? Rarely have I seen a more hideous woman.
 
sparkyumr98
2007-09-05 01:41:44 PM
ipsofacto:
Word.
//It's the old This.

RIMZ.
/It was This for about a half-hour this morning.
//Cross reference comments from the "Racism" article
 
rcain
2007-09-05 01:41:53 PM
MadAsshatter: What a clusterfark of douchebaggery this is. Helmsley herself was a douche, her brother who was left $15 million won't even take care of her dog, and her money grubbing housekeeper is out for the dog's money. Nuke from orbit.

QFT

/came here to post the same sentiments
 
MadAsshatter
2007-09-05 01:41:56 PM
Cerebral Ballsy: If your brother won't take care of your dog after you die, you probably treated him like shiat and deserve what you get. Also; if the dog's a biter, put it down or give it to the pound.

The $15 million should make up for her being a douche, he'll get over it.
 
NineInchNader
2007-09-05 01:42:43 PM
I just came here to say biatch. Biatch, biatch, biatch.

Isn't it odd that Fark will filter a perfectly cromulent word that even appears in most dictionaries, and yet I'm able to say things like "You dago, wop, ginny, honkey, cracker, spic, slant eyed hick loving commie bastard" with total impunity?

Also, why can I say wigger, but not n-to-the-igger, my nizzle?
 
NineInchNader
2007-09-05 01:43:44 PM
Oh, and... SKEET SKEET SKEET!
 
Cerebral Ballsy
2007-09-05 01:44:28 PM
Chiggity Chza: Cerebral Ballsy

Or give it to a Chinese restaurant, they like dog

I hear Michael Vick likes dogs.
 
TheSignPost [TotalFark]
2007-09-05 01:44:49 PM
Hello, she left the money to the dog precisely to cause this amount of headaches. If she had an ounce of reason left in her brain towards the end, she knew that nothing would come to pass exactly as she wrote it in the will.

She did it all to be spiteful. Mission accomplished. The son should simply take the money, hire a dogsitter and a fund administrator, and ride the whole thing out with minimum fuss. And if he is to inherit the difference when the dog dies, then he can simply allow for certain amounts to go to the troubled parties (housekeeper, other relatives) as he sees fit, and thereby save everyone a lot of stress.



/ I should be in charge of things.
 
Chiggity Chza
2007-09-05 01:45:23 PM
NineInchNader

I just posted a similar to that

I mean take for example fark, you can say kike, guido, gombah, mick, cracker, white trash but not attractive and successful African-American. Why? All equally offensive to the race, shouldn't all slurs apply to the filter? Our society is confused and scared. I just want to cry

/except i made the farking filter do all the work
 
Chiggity Chza
2007-09-05 01:47:08 PM
Cerebral Ballsy

Who is this Michael Vick character and what does he know about dogs. I bet our Asian friends like them more. They are staple in their diet.
 
packrabid04
2007-09-05 01:47:17 PM
Caesar1313: $12 Million to a farking dog.... I would pay money to hit this women upside the head with a shovel on her last day.... Forget donating the money to the poor or some other worthy cause instead pamper my shiat-rat so my sick and twisted legacy will haunt the world of the living well beyond the expiry date of my flesh.

She also donated the proceeds from her estates, estimated in the billions, to charity. I'd cut her a break on her little eccentricity here.
 
absoluteparanoia
2007-09-05 01:47:32 PM
i.l.cnn.net

GAH!!

The goggles, they do nothing!
 
beehphy
2007-09-05 01:49:00 PM
I know what to do to that dog:

www.jessebanks.com
 
awfulperson [TotalFark]
2007-09-05 01:49:25 PM
"That is the next step," Pop told the Times. "That dog got money. That money is going to be taken away from that dog."

i14.tinypic.com
 
jesusjuice007
2007-09-05 01:50:11 PM
i77.photobucket.com

... not amused
 
Torquemazda
2007-09-05 01:51:25 PM

So let me get this straight...

imagecache2.allposters.com


+


www.smh.com.au

= Remus Pop?
 
MyNameWasPicked
2007-09-05 01:51:47 PM
Cremate the dog and put the ashes in the plot, that should solve all problems. Can I have a few million?
 
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