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(Some Guy)   Gates sells MS stock to buy medical stocks. Coming soon: Blue EKG of Death   ( divider line
    More: Interesting  
•       •       •

3531 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Sep 2002 at 8:29 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

76 Comments     (+0 »)

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2002-09-06 06:20:40 PM  
Does anyone else think we're going to get a new kind of computer virus in the next version of Windows?

Talk about insider information.
2002-09-06 06:32:21 PM  
We have discovered a small 'security flaw' in your kidney transplant that could allow hackers root access to your bloodstream.
We recommend installing kidney security patch 12.
2002-09-06 07:07:51 PM  
"While you're waiting for your Heart XP(tm) to be installed, now would be a great time to fill out the registration card."
2002-09-06 08:33:29 PM  
if you dont upgrade your organ every two years does it becomes obsolete?
2002-09-06 08:34:37 PM  
Your heat have performed an illegal operation, and will be shut down.
2002-09-06 08:35:59 PM  
I can see it now...

Click through EULAs on all drugs that absolve them of all adverse affects medicine may have on your body.

Warranties on medicine that become void the moment it is taken.

And doctors trained that if a patient who is taking their drug or has their artifical organ is having potentially fatal problems they should reboot the patient.
2002-09-06 08:36:14 PM  
I can't type for shiat. Your Heart* has* performed an illegal operation and will be shut down.
2002-09-06 08:36:26 PM  
Every time you got a piercing or tattoo you'd have to call Microsoft and explain why your hardware configuration has changed, otherwise Nervous.SystemXP would quit working.
2002-09-06 08:36:53 PM  
Impotent? Just right click your balls...

I got nuthin'
2002-09-06 08:37:11 PM  
"It is now safe to turn of your pacemaker"... Oh wait...
2002-09-06 08:37:53 PM  
Fatal error!
2002-09-06 08:38:21 PM  
No organ device driver found for your gall bladder. Insert syringe with organ device driver now.
2002-09-06 08:38:48 PM  
everyon pick on mr gate who give the system to criticisize
him on
maybe confarkucis say it
2002-09-06 08:39:26 PM  
Great headline
2002-09-06 08:39:48 PM  

I knew I was right...

George Clooney and Anthony Michael Hall have SOMETHING in common!!!

Sort of...
2002-09-06 08:40:26 PM  
I'm fairly certain that a large number of medical devices already run on a windows base.
2002-09-06 08:40:35 PM  
Just looks like he's diversifying his portfolio to me. All of the stocks are way below their 52-week highs and all have good earnings. In fact, they all have better earnings that Mr. Softy.
2002-09-06 08:41:20 PM  
Damn you, Cory Doctorow, for giving him the idea!
2002-09-06 08:42:13 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-09-06 08:43:26 PM  
Your heart has caused an illegal operation error in module: Circulatory System.

2002-09-06 08:43:29 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
[image from too old to be available]
2002-09-06 08:43:50 PM  
The guy's onto something. He bought into Prozac. Just think: if we started bombing terrorist camps with Prozac bombs instead of TNT, they'd be all happied out. They'd be like, dude, we love you guys. We love America. We love pie 'n' stuff. Send Pam Anderson 'n' Kid Rock over, we think they're cool.

fark it. Bomb 'em with TNT.
2002-09-06 08:44:18 PM  
So what happens when MS BrainXP crashes?

I got nothing.
2002-09-06 08:45:14 PM  
Gives the words "defragmenting" and "system restore" a (w)hole new meaning...

And come to think of it:

Guy: Hi there, wanna drink?
Chick: Nah, we're not compatible...
Guy: *Crashes*
2002-09-06 08:48:18 PM  
Actually Homeless_need_help, you may be on to something. Imagine the prescriptions for anti-depressants that will be filled when we declare war (c'mon, you all know it's going to happen) on Iraq.
2002-09-06 08:48:35 PM  
Great ! Now doctors can be guided through brain surgery with "Stitchy" the the virtual surgeon. Woo Hoo !
2002-09-06 08:49:51 PM  
"At the same time, Gates, widely heralded as a trend-predicting savant..."

more like idiot-savant. isn't this the same assclown who thought the internet was a passing fad? isn't this the same assclown who hires 1000's of gates worshippers and spends billions of dollars and still can't create their own web browser (and has to buy IE from spyglass)? the best part is the video of that monkey bahmler jumping around on the stage sweating like niagara falls. gates got in early, realized who the competition was (unlike jobs at apple) but still continues to market a 3rd rate product based on 1980's code.


now i hope i can post this message before my computer cra
2002-09-06 08:50:06 PM  
He buys stock in Eli lilly & Co. the makers of Prozac because he knows his products will cause a record-breaking jump in Prozac sales.
2002-09-06 08:51:06 PM  
this is off the subject, but does anyone know the web address for the christian web site that reviews movies? I want to show my friend and laugh. thank you!
2002-09-06 08:51:10 PM  
2002-09-06 08:52:19 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2002-09-06 08:54:57 PM  
Going from Microsoft to Prozac? Now THAT is a man with a plan!
2002-09-06 08:55:38 PM  
I heard he was a hermaphrodite.
2002-09-06 08:55:44 PM  
Perhaps this one, Fuzzy?

Heh... Enema at the gates...
2002-09-06 08:56:07 PM  

2002-09-06 08:58:49 PM  
Um, guys, check me on this, will ya?

The article states that Gates bought 1,339,000 shares of Merck & Co.; Merck's site lists 2,249,574 outstanding common shares.

Gates bought a controlling (59%) interest in Merck?
2002-09-06 09:00:11 PM  
thanks, I don't think thats it thou, i think its like capp or caap, something like that. but thank you anyways!
2002-09-06 09:01:38 PM  
It's not like he's selling all his Microsoft...just a diversification move.

Don't worry, he's still holding a hefty stake in Microsoft with a solid $31 billion.

I think I'll go vomit not...
2002-09-06 09:03:42 PM  
2002-09-06 09:03:44 PM  
That's just the way of the big ole monopolist... buy 'em out, and if you can't: get the biggest interest.

Does the number of outstanding shares indicate anything, though? Couldn't there be a number of errrr... like, y'know, not outstanding shares? You know, private? Or sumpin?
2002-09-06 09:03:52 PM  
Once you get a MS brain, you can get AOL.

"You've got male"

Sorry ladies....
2002-09-06 09:04:35 PM  
For Christ's sake Homeless_need_help, I really, really hope you're wrong.
All jokes aside, Bill can just stay the hell away from the Medical Industry.
I don't care if he diversifys, I just don't want him to control anything. Medical
is too important.
2002-09-06 09:04:43 PM  
Merck has *WAY* more than 2 million outstanding shares. That is more like one days' trading in that stock.
2002-09-06 09:05:09 PM  
Funny that all three of those companies that he bought stock in use the same practice Microsoft does (e.g. buying out competitors and then jacking up prices - most recent case in point; Pfizer).
2002-09-06 09:05:14 PM  
You mean CAP?
2002-09-06 09:06:31 PM  
Fuzzygirl18: Cap Alert
2002-09-06 09:06:43 PM  
That 2.2 billion (thousand million) shares outstanding.
2002-09-06 09:06:50 PM  
Without knowing anything about Merck, I would assume that the outstanding shares are merely publicly available and that the majority is held privately (employee/former employee/family owned)
2002-09-06 09:07:24 PM  
I just don't want him to control anything. Medical
is too important.

Come now, the entire medical industry is already controlled by about 5 companies.

in the U.S., atleast. Expect that number to shrink once the larger firms begin to buy out the competitors or merge. Notice how ever since medicine became more of a business and has been plagued by more government involvement because of it, that prices have gone up and quality of service has gone down?
2002-09-06 09:07:28 PM  
Homeless: I didn't see where you were looking on the Merck site, but shows Merck with 2,249,574,000 outstanding shares.
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