Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Some Guy)   Georgia (non) crematorium operator says that Jesus told him to "Let the dead bury the dead" Not his fault they did it lackadaisically   ( divider line
    More: Dumbass  
•       •       •

4853 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Sep 2002 at 8:46 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

55 Comments     (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

2002-09-06 08:49:34 AM  
Okay, it's satire. Thank God.
2002-09-06 08:49:39 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Coming soon to a morgue near you.
2002-09-06 08:49:50 AM  
lacka what?
2002-09-06 08:50:03 AM  
Satire... OR IS IT!!!
2002-09-06 08:51:20 AM  
When he dies, they should just throw his body in the woods, too.

Lazy bastard.
2002-09-06 08:52:17 AM  
he was prolly too busy submitting links to FARK.
2002-09-06 08:53:14 AM  
"The Lord Jesus told us that the dead would bury the dead. Well, from the looks of things, they didn't do a very good job."
the dead are sooooo lazy
2002-09-06 08:53:28 AM  
George Romero unavailable for comment.
2002-09-06 08:55:38 AM  
That's what I say about my own job. I'm busy reading Let the work do the work.
2002-09-06 08:55:48 AM  
"Somedays you just can't get rid of a bomb!"
2002-09-06 08:55:50 AM  
God told me to hate you.
2002-09-06 08:58:05 AM  
Peter Tosh lyrics....
2002-09-06 09:00:35 AM  
Render unto death, that which is death's.
2002-09-06 09:00:35 AM  
It's alright, it's okay, there's something to live for!
Jesus told me so!
2002-09-06 09:07:11 AM  
Jesus just told me to make some eggs and toast.
2002-09-06 09:08:44 AM  
Honestly, I think the word asshat was invented for this guy. Every legitimate Christian in this country should make a pilgrimage to Georgia in order to defacate on this tool's head. I'm not even a christian, and I'm offended by this farker claiming Jesus told him to let the dead rot in his backyard.
2002-09-06 09:10:05 AM  
Hey, Andonbray!
Jesus just told me to tell you to eat your eggs and toast.
And yet, the Devil told me that I should eat your eggs and toast. What do YOU think?
2002-09-06 09:13:28 AM  
And this asshat has a preacher in his corner who says something to the effect "My opinion of the dead has slipped because of this (meaning the dead did not bury themselves) and the Lord doesn't mind because most of them are burning in sulfurous hell fire"


I truly despise people who ar convinced that some people are in Hell (which does not exist, IMHO). The only hell that exists is one that you create for yourself. I hope this (non) crematorium operator gets to meet all the folks he did not cremate in the afterlife.
2002-09-06 09:15:41 AM  
This is from back in February, at least. I was hoping to find that it was based on an actual comment by the guy, but I've had no luck finding it.

Um...based on the previous comments, how many of you actually read the whole thing???
2002-09-06 09:16:03 AM  
Shouldn't it be Georgia crematorium (non) operator
2002-09-06 09:17:03 AM  
How the fark can some people read lines like

It is unfortunate that a few lazy corpses can give everyone a bad name.

and not realise it's satire?
2002-09-06 09:17:03 AM  
I think that I have enough for everybody. How about hash browns?
2002-09-06 09:19:38 AM  
tmwes - I thought about that, but he was operating a non-functional crematorium.

You guys tell me, I'm an engineer.
2002-09-06 09:20:05 AM  
Ahhh... the satire impaired have awoken. They will burn in hell for their crimes.

Placed my order for Betty's book yesterday coincidentally.
2002-09-06 09:26:39 AM  
Whenever someone does something terrible, they always try to make it seem as if it came from a higher authority... Jesus, God. And when you think about it, most catholics believe that everything happens for a reason VIA God's "Divine Plan", so in actuality God did cause the events and merely used a meek human as a tool in his plan.

However, people only see "God" as doing his "work". You always hear people thanking God when something good happens, but when something bad happens it's not his fault.

I think this guy is farked up, but I think it's funny that he told them that Jesus had him do it. How can they say he didn't? What if he did? Are the man-made laws above the "lord's" word?

2002-09-06 09:26:45 AM  
I never thought I'd hear a Farker use a word like lackadaisically.
2002-09-06 09:30:53 AM  
I thought the dead were supposed to dig up the dead? Where else are you supposed to get more deadites?

"Welcome back to the land of the living... Now pick up a shovel and start digging!"
2002-09-06 09:33:39 AM  
On a side note, if the dead are supposed to bury the dead, who's supposed to bury the last guy? It's not like he can do it himself...
2002-09-06 09:39:41 AM  
What is with all the Landover Baptist links? Look, I think it's funny too, but enough is enough. There aren't that many gullible FARKers out there.

Or are there?
2002-09-06 09:47:51 AM  

Nice Evil Dead plug!!!
2002-09-06 09:50:04 AM  
yeah! breakfast at Andonbrays' I'll bring my own steak, but it it has to be well done!
2002-09-06 09:51:43 AM  
Seriously, folks - satire. Come on.

But on the topic: How does this asshat still walk the planet? Why hasn't someone killed him by now? You KNOW some of the families have to have guns. And family in prison, for that matter.

It's like Mike Tyson - why hasn't anyone done a Tupac on his ass yet?
2002-09-06 09:52:52 AM  
"Why is it when we talk to God it's called 'praying', but when God talks to us it's called 'schizophrenia'."

- Lilly Tomlin
2002-09-06 09:56:57 AM  

2002-09-06 09:57:48 AM  
What worries me is that some of the people on this thread are allowed to vote. It makes you wonder if democracy really is the best system.
2002-09-06 10:13:06 AM  
why would you even visit Fark if you have no understanding of sarcasm and satire?????
2002-09-06 10:13:59 AM  
adlib- why would you comment on the thread if you didn't even read the article????
2002-09-06 10:15:39 AM  

If you are referring to my post, you have mis-understood it. I know it was satire... I was merely conveying why it worked as satire.
2002-09-06 10:25:42 AM  
could somebpdy tell me wtf does "lackadaisically" mean?!?!?!?!?!??!?! ...big word farkers! they suck!
2002-09-06 10:36:09 AM  
Guasacaca, it means "lacking daisies" (ie, the daisies they're supposed to be pushing up).
2002-09-06 11:04:05 AM  
Guasacac, it means to do something half assed or being lazy about it.
2002-09-06 11:08:40 AM  
Ok Godfrey, I suppose this morgue dude suffered from lackabrainically.


2002-09-06 11:13:23 AM  
Isn't satire supposed to be witty? This is crap.
2002-09-06 11:23:31 AM  
Webster says : lacking life, spirit, or zest
2002-09-06 11:29:06 AM  

i apoligize. but it was pretty easily misinterpreted. as for the rest of you.....
2002-09-06 12:27:14 PM  
Shouldn't that be "Georgia crematorium (non)operator"?
2002-09-06 12:33:18 PM  
Why can't fark regulate the satire tag? This is possibly the definition of a satire article but it's got a dumbass tag on it so you don't even know it's total horse crap until halfway down the page... If you post something on here make sure it has the right tag attached!!!
2002-09-06 12:35:47 PM  
And I agree with CherynoblOne, the Landover Baptist stuff is played out cut those links down by about half...
2002-09-06 12:37:42 PM  
Podmore, it's hard enough getting people to realize the article's fake. We'll worry about syntax later. :)
2002-09-06 01:53:23 PM  
Good quote.. right on the mark!
Displayed 50 of 55 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.