Subby, you missed a platinum opportunity for the Hero tag.

Way to go, Bill Bollom.

I'm heading to the kitchen right now to make myself one.

"But it seems to me that the martini, a rock solid American institution, is dying, and this is a sad thing."

He sounds like my dad. Who is also from the midwest. (perhaps I should say mid-VEST this guy is a cheesehead) Eh time marches on. I've no sympathy because HE'S sad that Miss America isn't putting on her high heels for him.

I may be a youngster, but I raise my glass for this man. Awesome letter.

+1 for grate justice!!!11!!one!!one-and-three-quarters!

That left me feeling shaken & stirred.

/nice find subby

I've been trying to make this same point for quite some time now. Let me add as well that men should still carry handkerchiefs.

Add furburgers to the list.

Nothing like a healthy coiffed bush below the belt on a broad.

... but that seems to have gone the way of the Dodo

rocinante721: Add furburgers to the list.

Eh. Give me something nicely trimmed any day of the week.

Garter belts, martinis, high heels - in my mind these are classic signs of sophistication, and subtle, luxurious sex appeal.

On my second martini.

In celebration of this letter, of course.

nemoxnine Trimmed is one thing, shaved is another.

And for the record, there is no such thing as a 'shaved beaver'. Once shaved, it ceases to be a beaver.

Yeah, keep biatching gramps.

You didn't have blowjob parties and chicks with whale-tails when you were in high school.

You didn't have internet porn.

You didn't have access to 80 beers on tap at the bar down the street from your house.

Times change, and you're stuck in the past.

mmmm Martini! I know what I"m drinkin' tonight >:)

MEB
-and know what I"m wearing tonight >:P

High heels?! Those are totally in fashion right now.

Sometimes it's spiked heels (80s and now), sometimes it's wedges (now), sometimes it's chunky platforms (90s), but high heels have not disappeared.

Did someone say, "Martini"?

I miss the high heels, that's for sure. They're kinda making a comeback, but not the classic stiletto style.

//remembers the girls that wore "flats" in hs, 1990-1994.
//no heel, but still liked the pointy-toed shoes.

High heels and swimsuits.

You farking shoe fetishist, get your stupid sexual fixation with accessories out of my culture!

There is nothing stupider than high heels on a woman in a bathing suit, and who the hell wears shoes to bed?

hef?

most overrated letter-to-the-editor. Ever

Am I not supposed to wear shoes to bed?

/damn it!

All my personal favorites. Right on.

Link is suffering the Fark effect. Anyone able to digg it out of their cache and do a CTRL+V ?

I think I might get myself a martini tonight. I prefer Grey Goose vodka, three olives, and a little olive juice (mmmmm green olives).

*Dims the lights in this thread and cues up Henry Mancini's "Lujon"*

Props for HTML in the title tag.

vgt,

Here you go:

Spotlight letter: Nothing like a good martini, garter belts and high heels


Last night, like every night, I made myself a martini. I filled a glass with several cubes of ice, poured a little extra dry vermouth over the cubes, shook the glass a few times, poured out the vermouth, filled the glass with gin and added three green olives - a drink with a marvelous piney aroma and appearance.

But it seems to me that the martini, a rock solid American institution, is dying, and this is a sad thing. Oh, there are martini bars out there, but they don't serve real martinis; they are pink and blue. I find it hard to believe there is such a thing as a chocolate martini.

The martini is an honest drink, tasting exactly like what it is and nothing else. There are no fruit juices or chocolate in a martini, and it's not served in a pineapple shell. The martini is a clear, clean, cold, pure and honest drink - especially for people with established values and a liking for purity, even in their vices.

I regret the passing of this friend from our culture, just as I regret knowing that I'll never again see a pretty woman in nylons, garter belt and spiked heels. Now I read they want to do away with high heels and swimsuits in the Miss America Pageant. I suppose next it will be brown paper bags over heads and every contestant clothed in XXL potato sacks.

I want my grand daughters to have a shot at winning scholarships too, but if they look like a dump truck, they should change their appearance or enter a spelling bee.
Martinis, garter belts, bathing suits and high heels - why do good things pass away? Tonight I'm going to pour myself a martini, light up my pipe, sit in my backyard and give this matter a lot more thought.

Bill Bollom
Oshkosh

I'll drink one with you obladi6703.

Obladi - thanks!

what_now: //once bought stockings and garters for a boyfriend's birthday

I hope they fit him.

what_now-"once bought stockings and garters for a boyfriend's birthday"

Did that fit him?

I am in total agreement with this guy. I swear on everything that matters to me that I will not let these wonderful things fade from existance. I will partake in the martini on a nightly basis and never give up my spiked heels! I don't know about the whole garter thing. They're hot, but I don't think I actually own one.

/guess I need to go shopping

That read like a "Best of Craigslist" and I mean that in the most complimentary way possible. We need more people like that in this world.

I own a garter belt. Its a pain in the ass to wear, but its so hot and sexy, I want to do myself when I wear it.

Ah! You were quicker on the keyboard Xed Ping. :)

Oh, there are martini bars out there, but they don't serve real martinis; they are pink and blue.

Some of those places do serve real martinis. They just cost twice as much. Still the price is worth it if the martini is perfect and ice cold.

GIS for "martini garter belt high heel" gives this

I like to lick my nipples when I wear a garter myself.

Daffydil: Ah! You were quicker on the keyboard Xed Ping. :)

Yeah, I do that sometimes :)

I'm partial to a Manhattan, myself. If it's a Martini - make it with gin.

Bathing suits and high heels have their place but, not usually together. The Miss America thing is old and busted and should have died a respectable death about 20 years ago.

The good old days were never as good as we imagine them to be.

And stay off my lawn!!!

Have to somewhat agree...here is my take

Where have men in stylish suits (with a hat and handkerchief), doors being held open for women, men able to be sexy without being lewd, classic sincere conversation, real slow dancing (not just standing there rubbing bodies),woo'ing before do'ing......I'm sure there is more, but I slammed a finger in a door today and cant type too much.

I dunno Safe, I was thinking of Leonard Cohen, then some Screaming Blue Messiah topped off my some DK


/maybe we're going in different directions here ;)

ScarletAurora
I own a garter belt. Its a pain in the ass to wear, but its so hot and sexy, I want to do myself when I wear it.


Thanks for creating tonight's fapfest material!