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(Chick)   Lisa   (chick.com) divider line 86
    More: Weird  
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6024 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Jul 2001 at 5:28 PM (13 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



86 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2001-07-15 05:34:05 PM  
That was a quick turnaround. As usual. Chick on child molestion.

It kinda freaked me out when I went back and fark had updated.
 
2001-07-15 05:42:37 PM  
Eeeewww...!
 
2001-07-15 05:55:14 PM  
that is now the number one sickest chick tract ever. "it's okay, honey. daddy gave you vd, but he found jeebus, so it's fine now!"
 
2001-07-15 05:57:33 PM  
That's plain sick.
 
2001-07-15 06:01:20 PM  
Whatever drug Chick's on, I'll make sure to avoid it.
 
2001-07-15 06:01:23 PM  
And they all lived happily ever after...
 
2001-07-15 06:02:01 PM  
upon reflection, i guess it wasn't the dad that gave her vd. it was the neighbor. still sick as fuck, though. and not in a good way.
 
2001-07-15 06:15:35 PM  
So, its OK to molest children as long as you repent in the end -- and you won't go to jail to boot? Good message, Chick. Jesus loves sex offenders!
 
2001-07-15 06:33:22 PM  
Nazzerov- if the person molested young girls, repented and didn't go to heaven, you'd be blasting Christianity also.

It is not OK to do that, you only think that because of the "Repent and do whatever" deal that people use to drive people down to hell with them. He just repented his sins (which were Porn and that), if they were OK, why would he need to get rid of them?

Sure, the VD could give her big problems. Just another risk of having sex with strangers. Which is why you shouldn't do that (DUH!).

Child Molesting is very sick, to think some people would want to defend them (NAMBLA) is even sicker.
 
2001-07-15 06:40:57 PM  
"Having sex with strangers" is not was causes VD.
Having unprotected sex with somebody who has VD, now that is something different. The odds of getting VD are greater.
 
2001-07-15 06:42:24 PM  
"Sure, the VD could give her big problems. Just another risk of having sex with strangers. Which is why you shouldn't do that (DUH!)."

That's why you should have sex with relatives, you know where they have been.
 
2001-07-15 06:44:16 PM  
Since people lived shorter lives ( just go with me on this one, disregard the 800-year old men ), were people considered adults at an earlier age, such as 12 or 14?
What would have been the average marrying age?
 
2001-07-15 06:46:01 PM  
It's more likely that you will get a VD from sex with a stranger than from somebody you know.

VDs get thru condoms. No sex is 100% safe.

CC
 
2001-07-15 06:49:51 PM  
Cybersex and phone sex are safe!
 
2001-07-15 06:51:03 PM  
Don't forget magazines and videoes, MrMud!
 
2001-07-15 06:51:33 PM  
videos
 
2001-07-15 06:52:10 PM  
Can we all at least agree to one sensible thing C-C has said: NAMBLA is a bunch of sick fvcks.
 
2001-07-15 06:54:16 PM  
Which of course assumes that none of the people you know have VD. Do you give them a questionaire before befriending them?
This Chick tract is the best example why I don't like christianity. In the old days, you converted people by the sword. Now you try to convert them through coercive manipulation and threats.
Instead of telling people to do good things because it's just the right thing to do. You tell them to do things because God said so and if you don't you're going to hell.
Morality and ethics are possible without your religion.
 
2001-07-15 06:58:28 PM  
NAMBLA - You mean the National Assoc. of Marlon Brando Look Alikes?
What's wrong with them?
;)
 
2001-07-15 07:00:34 PM  
source

Two-thirds of all STDs occur in people 25 years of age or younger.

The moral of the story: having sex with young people causes VD. ALWAYS have sex with somebody old.
 
2001-07-15 07:02:44 PM  
If God is all-powerful and forgiving and wants everyone to get into heaven, why doesn't he just forgive us and let us in instead of sending us to hell? It doesn;t make any sense.

That's one of the main reasons i can't "get" christianity. It's stupid things like that that really bothers me.

I think Bart Simpson best described christianity when he said: "Damned if you do and damned if you don't"

Your lord and party saviour,

Buddy Jesus
 
2001-07-15 07:05:33 PM  
source
WELCOME! The North American Man/Boy Love Association (NAMBLA) was formed in 1978. It was inspired by the success of a campaign based in Boston's gay community to defend against a local witchhunt.

NAMBLA's goal is to end the extreme oppression of men and boys in mutually consensual relationships by:

building understanding and support for such relationships;
educating the general public on the benevolent nature of man/boy love;
cooperating with lesbian, gay, feminist, and other liberation movements;
supporting the liberation of persons of all ages from sexual prejudice and oppression.
Our membership is open to everyone sympathetic to man/boy love and personal freedom.



But what exactly is ageism? Simply stated, people are guilty of ageism when they:

ignore a person's ideas or contributions simply because of that contributing person's age;

fail to recognize a person's abilities due solely to his or her age;

imply that a person's behavior stems directly from his or her current age.
 
2001-07-15 07:05:47 PM  
You are all missing the point.

The thing to take away from this, is that this cartoon is waaaaaay funnier than Dilbert.
 
2001-07-15 07:09:08 PM  
Didn't anyone see the NAMBLA Southpark episode?
Go on Butters, take one for the team.

I like the statement at the end by Stan. "Hey I'm all for freedom of expression and all that other gay stuff, but dude, fark you."
 
2001-07-15 07:37:45 PM  
Buddy_Jesus: Well, obviously God is more than just all love, forgiveness, and happiness.
 
2001-07-15 07:44:37 PM  
I have a hard time with this one. On one hand I think this is the sickest shiat I've ever seen and fail to see how Jesus could make everything alright. I'd want to see the scurvy bastard and his slimeball neighbor castrated, tortured and burned at the stake. On second thought, I don't have a hard time with this one at all. I want to see the scurvy bastard and his mudderfarking slimeball neighbor castrated, tortured and burned at the stake. Oh yeah, and it should be televised. I think Jesus would approve.
 
2001-07-15 07:45:40 PM  
Christain Conservative and I endorse mutual masturbation as a safe alternative to unprotected sex.
 
2001-07-15 07:47:52 PM  
Why do Christians believe everything Jesus said and not all of the other nutjobs who claim to be the sons of God? Maybe because he was the first crazy bastard (used literally) to come around, therefore he has dibs? Or maybe it was because some man of power needed a way to subdue his people and Jesus was the most convenient fellow for the task? Hmmm!
 
2001-07-15 07:54:37 PM  
Maybe Jesus was just trying to hide from the Roman soldiers chasing him so he started preaching.

A la Life Of Brian
 
2001-07-15 07:55:03 PM  
Wait a minute, let's look at the facts.

1) Man commits horrible sins.
2) Man repents, Jesus accepts him, and his little girl apparently gets cured from VD.

In OTHER words-we can now go and have all the premarital sex we want, get dieseases, and then when we accept god, it all goes away. B[I]i[/I]tchin!
 
2001-07-15 07:55:32 PM  
Boy, that was some sloppy html.
 
2001-07-15 08:01:41 PM  
Did anyone else have to masterbate after that story. Ofcourse i had to replace the characters with ones that were a bit more familier {FAMILYier?}.
 
2001-07-15 08:41:42 PM  
i'm STILL waiting for someone to hook me up with someone who will help me H4X0R chick's festering grounds. i already have a design idea in mind. all i need is someone to break in and load the files.
 
2001-07-15 09:53:27 PM  
wierd and disturbing....I guess chick thinks all guys who watch a little porn have no jobs and diddle little kids. typical christian asshole
 
2001-07-15 09:58:45 PM  
WOW! There's actually an old song by a group named "Alice Donut" about this very Chick tract. I think it's off their tersely named "Buckets full of sickness an horror in an otherwise meaningless life" album!
 
2001-07-15 10:16:32 PM  
Ha, dug it up - it's named "Lisa's Father" and, if anyone's interested, it can be found on the gnet.
 
2001-07-15 10:16:34 PM  
Am I the only one who nearly died laughing at the "Let's pray... TEN MINUTES LATER" line near the end of the strip?
Good god, I could just see the bat-symbol zooming in and out with the annoying trumpet effect.
I guess we don't need to destroy Christianity.. They're doing it themselves.

Somebody dig up a fact, or else I'm going to create one. 95% of all Darwin Award recipients were Christians.
 
2001-07-15 10:22:46 PM  
"wierd and disturbing....I guess chick thinks all guys who watch a little porn have no jobs and diddle little kids. typical christian asshole"

Careful, you are starting to sound like what the Christians call the "typical atheist dickwad." :)

"Sure, the VD could give her big problems. Just another risk of having sex with strangers. Which is why you shouldn't do that (DUH!)."

No, a good reason not to have sex with strangers, is because God doesn't want you to. Of course, when we have all this death bed repenting going on....
 
2001-07-15 10:28:47 PM  
So let me see if I got this right. VCR rental leads to incest. Oh.

And I love the, "Hi buddy, come on in. Never mind the smell of fresh spooge in the air." I thinking CHICK'S true colors are starting to come though.
 
2001-07-15 10:33:24 PM  
Chick is slowly returning to his roots. In the next tract, he is going to kill off atleast three characters, one of which will make a death bed repent.

ULTRA VIOLENT, INCEST LACED, HARD CORE, AMERICAN TRACT PORNO... set to the key of fundamentalist.
 
2001-07-15 11:02:04 PM  
I reckon the sickest part is at the end, when they all become one happy family.
"We've got wonderful news, Lisa. Your daddy and I will never hurt you again."
"Really?"
"Really honey. We love you and Jesus does too."
(Lets all say "Aaahh, how sweet")
AS IF!
Where does Jack Chick live? On another planet called Fantasyland?
Sorry if this is all disjointed; I'm just so disgusted.
 
2001-07-15 11:23:40 PM  
Ok, I admit it.

I am guilty of this sin on a daily basis.

Only it's my nephew, not my daughther.

Please forgive me.
 
2001-07-15 11:28:26 PM  
C-C You're a sick fark.
 
2001-07-15 11:34:41 PM  
You're all going to hell.
 
2001-07-15 11:36:42 PM  
see, the fact is, I've been lying to you all for the last few months.

I am really user "RobbieFal"
Just check my past comments, you'll see what I really think.

Why am I masquerading as a Christian Conservative?
Well, I cant tell ya that!

What I CAN tell you is that I pissed off the wrong guy, though. See, I usually just spew out ridiculous comments with hopes of provoking any ol response. I dont care what the response is, i Just wanna piss people off! T

well, it appears that I was found out!!

instead of arguing with me, an astute user recognized my fraud and decided to prove it and expose it!
`
 
2001-07-15 11:41:21 PM  
In all seriousness, anyone who perpetuates the hellfire teaching should be shot. Hell is nothing more than a religious marketing ploy to scare people into the church.

Hellfire (as a burning place of torture, blah, blah) is not taught in the bible. That's a fact that any reputable biblical scholar will tell you. All it takes is research.

I hate talking about this shiate because it's fruitless. I just hope that with the advent of the internet and it's countless sources of reference, people will dig down and find the truth about some of the false teachings.

Then they can tell their idiot preachers/pastors/fathers/molesters to drop dead. Man, am I would up tonight or what?
 
2001-07-15 11:45:32 PM  
By the way, I'm really "RobbieFal". I had to pose as Bigpeeler since I was discovered not to be Christian Conservative. Demosthenes found me out, only himself to be revealed to be Nazzerov. I contacted Drew about the whole charade, but he turned out to be CHICK. Go to hell, the lot of you.
 
2001-07-16 12:12:44 AM  
'Henry, men love darkness because it hides their evil deeds'

WTF? I love darkness. I love it because I can use it to hide from the world, to withdraw and not be seen, nor heard. To live in anonymity, solitude. The darkness is the ultimate companion, always surrounding you, enveloping you.

Oh, and I'm seriously tired. need sleep. goodnight, time to hide in my darkness once again.
 
2001-07-16 12:17:41 AM  
i'm gonna barf
 
2001-07-16 12:20:06 AM  
Damnation, CC, you ruined the fun.
 
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