SchlingFo: A Chinese prostitute named Cheng.

She seized control over her husbands fleet after he died. At her peak, she commanded 400 ships and 70,000 pirates.

So, he was cool with his wife sleeping with other men for money? Or was that a commentary on the economics of marriage?

Was she at least a good lay?

A friend got me this book, pretty damn funny.




http://www.amazon.com/Pirates-Adventure-Communists-Novel/dp/0375423974

KrispyKringle
I think she was no longer a prostitute by then. I think she was kinda old for that.

KrispyKringle

Was she at least a good lay?

Don't know about that but I heard she had a nice booty.

REVSKIPPY



Ohhhh sorry you're wrong. It was the MOOPS

This is supposed to constitute proof that they didn't say aar?

The article completely lacks evidence, save for the fact that some guy from some place talked like that and played Long John Silver

/NOBODY walked the plank? Please...
//You can't make stuff like that up...

I want a really good pirate game to come out. Pirates! on computer was pritty good but it just half way went to where I want piracy to go. I want it to be first person, and to drive my ship around and burn down ports, looting my way around the caribean.

kb7rky: Dammit, st4t3x and Kid Mojo...I came in here to post those!

The more Kari the better!

for those of you who don't already know.

Say that again and I'll nail yer tits to the table!

FTFA:In the myth-confirming side, pirates were known to dress in loose clothing...


But I don't want to be a pirate!

/obligatory

Fish7044

Me and the girl were REALLY bored one weekend and we picked that up at Hollywood video. I don't remember laughing so hard at a single movie. Especially the completely unecassary addition of "Well shiver me timbers!!!" out of nowhere.

Yes atmicmask, they need a Grand Theft Skiff: Caribbean game.

for the rest of us kari byron lovers: http://www.karibyron.com/

it's her artwork... that chick must be all sorts of crazy fun in bed. she probably has bed build-offs. that'd be sweet

Freezebyte
I have the blockbuster online thing and I need something to rent so is that worth watching?

/even if the laughs are cause it sucks if it sucks enough it might be
//plus there seems to be a lot of nice tail on the front there

yes, a better terrible movie there is surely not.

But then again, there's always ninja werewolves.

YOU ARE A PIRATE!!
DO NOT LISTEN TO THIS. IT WILL HAUNT YOU FOR LIFE
http://piratelol.ytmnd.com/

Dave the Puller: The article completely lacks evidence

QFT. That is all...

/blargh!

CygnusDarius
That is the Gheyist thing since Ghey came to Gheytown. It is Gheyer than a tree full of parrots jerking off a tree full of spider monkeys.

The article was written by a complete idiot.
/go back to your AP writting class about Ray Bradbury

Uncle Karl

Oh its definently worth a rental, especially if you have open minded friends over with some drinks, but sadly must of the tits are silicon made in California and almost no bush. But hey, at least the expensive sets make it look good! Cept for the first scene, it looks like any other cheap porn. Oh and the CGI will make you WISH you were watching Tron.

/you'll get REALLY sick of the captain guy after 10 minutes
//this movie needed Asia Carerra.
///It aint porn if there is labia being shown.

Scuze me, ISN'T is the correct wording.

they're obviously in Somalia dude.

Freezebyte
If it is porn why is it in blockbuster?

/the blip from the site:
Take a sexy ride on the high seas with some swashbuckling pirates whose erotic adventures are sure to shiver your timbers as and lusty ladies Devon, Janine, and Teagan Presley do battle with all manner of scallywags in a wild ride on the haunted sea featuring skeleton warriors, Incan magic, and, of course, prurient pirates who are always up for a romp in the cabin

I am still waiting for VampirePirateNinjaZombiesWerewolfGhosts.
That would be badass.
The only thing that can stop them are MinniatureElfGnomeGiants and those are hard to find.

theorellior

What about the eye patches?

Mythbusters actually addressed this question on one of their shows. They found that eye patches actually improve night vision by 50% or more (all numbers come directly from my ass, but you get the idea). So they hypothesized that the eye patches allowed pirates to travel between the deck and the hold rapidly without having to stop and blink a dozen times.

dammit is screwed up, it should be VampirePirateNinjaZombieWerewolfGhosts
the zombie cannot be plural
now it makes sense

Uncle Karl

Because its classified as "Grade B" porn not "Grade A" that you find in the naughty stores. Basic Instinct showed more then this movie did.

Freezebyte
Oh damn, I was hoping blockbuster had started carrying porn.

/Blockbuster need to start carrying porn

Freezebyte
Actually, i think i read somewhere about that movie, it has 2 versions, one is r-rated and one is x-rated. Though i cant be sure....

muslimb_pakistani_guy

Hollywood had the X-rated version and honestly, I get better hard ons when I got to the local mall then this movie.

Freezebyte
Ummm.... ok

muslim_pakistani_guy

I'm not sure if I want to thank you or hate you for posting that link.

muslim_pakistani_guy
Thanks for the info. I will be going to the local adult store and renting the good version then.

I think when most people hear "pirate," what they actually think is "privateer."

/West Country accents FTW

Muslim

What, you think im joking?

CygnusDarius, that's not a ninja werewolf.

That's a furry.

envisages
Its awesome, right?
I've had it open for like 3 hours

Freezebyte
What? No!

Nakito
CygnusDarius, that's not a ninja werewolf.

That's a furry.

Oh shiat... Oh fark no, no...

Bakeroo

uhhh Im from the West and I sure as hell don't associate "pirate" with privateer.

That article is amazing in its ability to pack so much misinformation, convenient generalization, and half truths into such a small space.

On the same note, though, quick draw gunfights and cowboy hats were nonexistent in the old west.

/How can you prove the non-existence of pirate treasure maps?

Keels: A pirate I was meant to be! Trim the sails and roam the sea!

i don't think you understand what trimming means in relation to sailing...
i mean i guess you could use it in that context but it doesn't really work that way

You know, I don't care if a wench is busty or not, long as she got a serviceable bajoiner.

.

Cue the pirates vs. global warming temperatures in 3...2...1...