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(News.com.au)   Drunken idiot rips the head off budgie, sets his apartment on fire, tells firefighters he'll kill them if they put it out and then threatens police with garden tools before being pepper sprayed. This guy brought his 'A' game   (news.com.au) divider line 78
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6212 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 May 2007 at 2:30 PM (7 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2007-05-24 01:41:11 PM
You sold my dead bird to a blind kid?
 
2007-05-24 01:41:30 PM
He forgot to tape the head back on the bird and give it to a blind kid.
 
2007-05-24 01:42:15 PM
I sincerely hope my obituary includes the term "drunken idiot".
 
2007-05-24 02:08:23 PM
Vacuum cleaner sucks up budgie
 
2007-05-24 02:33:45 PM
Yeah, His A-ristocrats! Game.
 
2007-05-24 02:34:44 PM
Kuala Lumpur!
 
2007-05-24 02:35:00 PM
Ozzy's back on the sauce!
 
2007-05-24 02:36:31 PM
The hell is a budgie?
 
2007-05-24 02:36:37 PM
PC load letter beat me to it
 
2007-05-24 02:36:38 PM
i199.photobucket.com
 
2007-05-24 02:36:40 PM
Dr. Knockboots: He didn't even have a head!

Harry, I took care of it.....

Pretty bird, pretty bird.

AHAHA classic.

/sorry
 
2007-05-24 02:37:13 PM
Did he tell anyone he was hardcore though?
 
2007-05-24 02:37:34 PM
sounds like a typical Thursday around here...
 
2007-05-24 02:37:44 PM
Parakeet: A keet that stays with you until a real keet arrives. --George Carlin
 
2007-05-24 02:38:00 PM
Funkychuck

budgie = parakeet
 
2007-05-24 02:38:18 PM
What the hell is a budgie? A bird? Ozzy loose?
 
2007-05-24 02:39:35 PM
Crikey!

And the happy couple is still together.

Assuming his 'partner' was a woman, this just goes to show why some of us men are such asshats. Because we can be. My wife acts like that, she's out. I know my wife would kick me to the curb also, as well she should.
 
2007-05-24 02:40:12 PM
SHAAAAAROOOON!
 
2007-05-24 02:40:20 PM
Dr.Knockboots: You sold my dead bird to a blind kid?

GOD DAM IT!

Pretty bird, Pretty Bird
 
2007-05-24 02:40:44 PM
I like to have what he was drinking.. Fun times
 
2007-05-24 02:41:40 PM
TA-DAAAAA!!
 
2007-05-24 02:41:41 PM
Defence counsel John Buxton said Johnson had tried to put out the fire at one stage and had picked up the garden fork to smash windows, but the fire was too hot.

Another lame ass farkline that misses the point of the article entirely. When I couldn't get my computer to work the obvious next step was threatening to kill tech support.
 
2007-05-24 02:42:03 PM
FTFA - Johnson did not face charges relating to the budgie's death"

What? I find it hard to believe there are no laws prote...
oh, in England. That makes sense.

/tired of stupid laws.
 
2007-05-24 02:42:16 PM
AN alcoholic ripped the head off his family's budgie

What the hell is that?

/I'd have called it a chazwozzer.
 
2007-05-24 02:42:28 PM
Funkychuck

The hell is a budgie?

It is a colloquial name for a 'budgerigar'.
 
2007-05-24 02:42:41 PM
Wait... the budgie had an apartment?
 
2007-05-24 02:43:38 PM
A gardening fork???

If I were one of the firefighters, I would have laughed at him and then 'countered' with about 20,000 gallons of water, properly pressurized, of course.
 
2007-05-24 02:44:33 PM
The Aristocrats?

/Looks up thread.
//Damn you Tiamat, you stole my gag!
 
2007-05-24 02:45:09 PM
So, what year did the Bengals draft this guy?
 
2007-05-24 02:45:44 PM
I came in to make some sort of a Dumb and Dumber joke. I see that since I didn't Weeners or second, I am too late.

/well done
 
2007-05-24 02:46:05 PM
Well it's funny you should ask that, but I've just been reading a great big book about how to put your budgie down, and apparently you can either hit them with the book, or, you can shoot them just there, just above the beak.
 
2007-05-24 02:46:07 PM
good thing he wasn't black, cause he'd be dead.
 
2007-05-24 02:51:07 PM
Funkychuck
"Budgie" is Aussie slang for penis
 
2007-05-24 02:51:55 PM
and he's out on bail!
 
2007-05-24 02:52:17 PM
Damn. And the guy started off so well.

/farking can't stand farking budgies
 
2007-05-24 02:52:29 PM
Tada!?

/nothin'
 
2007-05-24 02:53:43 PM
shiatty writing
 
2007-05-24 02:55:15 PM
Am I the only one wondering what happened to the dog?

IS THE DOG OK???
 
2007-05-24 02:55:16 PM
upload.wikimedia.org

Noooooo! Not Budgie! What did they ever do to get their heads ripped off?

/if you get this joke, you're my age
//if you get this joke, you're too farking old
///they're the ones who originally wrote "Breadfan", not Metallica you youngins'
 
2007-05-24 02:56:03 PM
Why the Obvious tag?
 
2007-05-24 02:57:14 PM
Should've gone the extra mile and worn a gas mask.
 
2007-05-24 02:58:47 PM
ha-ha. submitter said 'budgie,' the bloody chav
 
2007-05-24 02:58:59 PM
What a farking lightweight.
 
2007-05-24 02:59:23 PM
mordantkitten:Why the Obvious tag?

Because the guy was drunk. Aussie drunk.
 
2007-05-24 03:03:21 PM
www.violently-happy.net

In case anyone was wondering.

/had to google it myself
 
2007-05-24 03:04:05 PM
BUDGIE was a tremendously influential hard-rock power trio.

Along with bands like SIR LORD BALTIMORE and CAPTAIN BEYOND
they are sadly pretty obscure now.(PENTAGRAM were awesome too)

Interesting,originally BUDGIE in the 60s was more a blues band like CREAM or the YARDBIRDS but when BLACK SABBATH came out they decided to follow that lead into heavier realms.

btw--I am 39 yrs ols.
 
2007-05-24 03:08:56 PM
He's got tha magic dust!
 
2007-05-24 03:14:25 PM
good thing pot's illegal.
 
2007-05-24 03:17:15 PM
Mr Nibbs said Johnson had drunk as many as 10 750ml bottles of beer before the dispute.

If I drank that much beer I've be in the ICU having my stomach pumped with nurses placing bets on my survival.

Good on ya, hardcore bird-killing Aussie drunk lunatic!
 
2007-05-24 03:18:34 PM
Thanks dcigary and craigdamage, my faith is retored!

Metallica also covered "Crash Course In Brain Surgery" from these guys

/Pagan Altar anyone?
 
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