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(Iwon)   Paris Hilton so "emotionally distraught and traumatized" over jail sentence she isn't capable of testifying in civil lawsuit, wearing panties   ( divider line
    More: Dumbass  
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20056 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 May 2007 at 2:43 PM (10 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

117 Comments     (+0 »)

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2007-05-15 03:09:37 PM
2007-05-15 03:09:40 PM  
lawman2k: What's the equivalent of "don't drop the soap" for women in jail?

Don't piss off the alpha butch?
2007-05-15 03:11:19 PM  
They discontinued the early release, she'll likely do at least 30 days.
2007-05-15 03:11:44 PM  
Four of the muslim guys plotting to attack Fort Dix had over 50 tickets between them for driving without a license. They never did any jail time, as illegal immigrants charged like that never see a jail. It's not even legal (in some states) for the cops to ask for any proof of citizenship.

Only the law abiding citizens like poor Paris go to jail.

Just sayin.
2007-05-15 03:14:55 PM  
2007-05-15 03:14:58 PM  
They discontinued the early release, she'll likely do at least 30 days.

If true, Woot!

Duckbutt59 You must be lucky enough to know nothing about her. If you did you would know there are many, many perfectly good reasons to dislike her.
2007-05-15 03:15:45 PM  
Don't drop the soap.

You might get analed.

//hoping for it
2007-05-15 03:17:28 PM  
Mumbler: serious question. If a cop pulls you over, exactly what would you show as proof of citizenship? Your pasty white skin? There are basically two primary documents that US citizens use to prove citizenship: 1: a US Passport and 2: a birth certificate (and even this is not conclusive). Most people carry neither of these around with them, and there is NO master database of US citizens.

Yes, US immigration needs reform.. it's actually perhaps the only area where GWB actually is supporting a reasoned plan, as well. But don't go into absurdities about cops who pull you over asking for citizenship - it's just not possible.
2007-05-15 03:18:11 PM  

Only the law abiding citizens like poor Paris go to jail.

Right, law abiding, that's why she's going to jail. She's SOOOOO law abiding. That's the term, law-abiding.

(insert quizzical dog)
2007-05-15 03:18:32 PM  
While I hate her as much as all of you, wishing rape on some one is just plain horrible. Some of you really need to lighten up and get some new material.
2007-05-15 03:19:31 PM  
It looks like she stole that jacket from a five year-old on the way to the court room.
2007-05-15 03:21:57 PM  
Am I the only one who wishes Paris Hilton would get shot in the farking head?

Sadly, probably not.
As if there aren't thousands upon thousands of better candidates for a bullet to the head.
2007-05-15 03:23:17 PM  
What's the equivalent of "don't drop the soap" for women in jail?

Watch out for the scissors?
2007-05-15 03:23:41 PM  
What a weak and pathetic excuse for a human being.
2007-05-15 03:26:00 PM  
They discontinued the early release, she'll likely do at least 30 days.

From the LA Times:

Sheriff's Department spokesman Steve Whitmore said Hilton's sentence could be cut nearly in half by state law allowing for credit for time served for good behavior. In addition, he said, overcrowding in the jail system could further reduce the time she spends in custody.

Overcrowding has been a major issue in the L.A. County jail system, with some inmates -- even violent ones -- serving as little as 10% of their sentences. (If that standard was applied to Hilton, she would serve less than a week in jail.)

Actress Michelle Rodriguez, who starred on "Lost," was sentenced to 60 days in jail for a probation violation last year but ended up serving less than a day in jail.
2007-05-15 03:26:37 PM  
Just out of curiosity, how many FARKers here would be "emotionally distraught and traumatized" if they were facing a jail sentence? Yeah, that's what I thought.

Carry on...
2007-05-15 03:26:41 PM  
farkingtomtom: What a weak and pathetic excuse for a human being.

Umm the Jerry Falwell thread is that way ->>>> oh you meant to post that in this thread? Very well then, carry on ;)
2007-05-15 03:28:03 PM  
Where are you, Sunny Ray!!!
2007-05-15 03:28:51 PM  
No way she stays in jail for 45 days. One week, tops. My bets are on four days.

/"Overcrowded" grumble grumble
//Something about the war on drugs
///no justice
2007-05-15 03:29:20 PM  
Mumbler: Only the law abiding citizens like poor Paris go to jail.

if she were so goddamned "law abiding" she wouldn't be facing jail time, would she?

/just sayin'
2007-05-15 03:29:30 PM  
she was only in there 2 hours.

2007-05-15 03:30:32 PM  
lawman2k: What's the equivalent of "don't drop the soap" for women in jail?

moonphrogg: Don't piss off the alpha butch?

srhp29: Watch out for the scissors?

I was thinking something along the lines of "one way ticket to fist city" or "watch out for the knuckle sandwich." Only pithier. "Don't shave your legs?"
2007-05-15 03:32:38 PM

What's with the lazy eye?!?
2007-05-15 03:33:26 PM  
El Craulerino: They should put her in with this guy, he can show her the ropes.

Whats been happening with him lately, anyway? I miss the updates....
2007-05-15 03:33:33 PM  
I really would love to see her get phist pharked by a 350
bull dyke who rolls her own tampons.

2007-05-15 03:34:25 PM
2007-05-15 03:35:23 PM  
I'm no fan of hers in particular but I don't understand the hatred of her. As far as I know she is a relatively harmless bimbo. That's kind of an American tradition. Why on earth was Zsa Zsa Gabor ever famous? Paris is just Zsa Zsa for the 21st Century.
2007-05-15 03:36:41 PM  
I gotta tell yah, if I was a woman in the prision where Paris goes I would punch her in the face at least once.

Not for drunk driving, just for being her. She's such a spoiled, arrogant, self-centered biatch she obviously needs a punch in the face.

"Nothing personal sweety, but you've had this coming for years now........ POW"
2007-05-15 03:41:14 PM  
Falwell pushing up daisies
Hilton on her way to jail

Could this day possibly get any better?

/well Lexa Doig could force her way into my home carrying two bottles of glenfiddich and a box of condoms... but, naaaah lets not jinx it.
2007-05-15 03:43:25 PM  
Death to America It's not that bad: ( Grab a book.

That just makes it worse! How heartless to tell Paris " Rread a book!" You might as well tell Jerry Falwell to get up - it's about as likely. And probably just as impossible.

Given a choice, she'll pick the bulldyke sexual assault over reading.
2007-05-15 03:45:25 PM  
I did a poor job of adding the sarcasm when I called her "law abiding". She is not "law abiding" except perhaps that unlike many people charged with such a crime, she at least showed up in court. Many people, including the terrorists I mentioned, do not even show up at court. One of Paris' lawyers arguments was that she was not treated the same as any average person charged with the same crime - my example showed that in some ways she is right about that.

As for cops asking proof of citizenship, of course most people don't carry their passport or birth certificate. But they do have some sort of ID, the cops are allowed to ask for a driver's license. If the driver does not have one, it seems reasonable that the cops may have reason to suspect the driver is hiding something. Could be illegal status, could be that they are on the run, in any case, what happens now is that the cops ticket them, expect them to show up in court, and unlike Paris, they don't. And sometimes, those drivers they let off end up attempting an attack on Fort Dix, or the World Trade Center.
2007-05-15 03:50:06 PM  
The only topic that gets both conservatives and liberals rolling their eyes in contempt.

Paris- She is a uniter not a divider.
2007-05-15 03:50:49 PM  
How many days after she's released from jail before she gets picked up again for DUI? Do you think there are odds in Vegas on this?
2007-05-15 03:52:12 PM  

Aargh, I wish I knew where that pic was taken! I swear, I recognize at least half the girls in that photo, like maybe from high school, or perhaps college. It's driving me crazy.
2007-05-15 03:54:27 PM
2007-05-15 03:54:40 PM  
lol -

Now she's doing her act so bad *everyone* can see what she really is ... :)
2007-05-15 03:56:08 PM  
I couldn't finish reading the article due to a siezure that was induced by that god damn flashing ad in the lower left hand corner.

2007-05-15 04:02:23 PM

Hey, if she Paris sell a clothing line for dogs, she may as well roll with it.
2007-05-15 04:06:20 PM  

/fixed it for ya
2007-05-15 04:07:12 PM  
Yeah, Paris, that's how jail's supposed to work. You're supposed to not want to go there. The way to avoid going there is to, among other things, not drive twice on a suspended license.

And if this is the excuse you're using, don't get your hopes up about winning the civil case either.
2007-05-15 04:10:44 PM  
Walker Boy are you people gonna be disappointed when you see the amount of time she actually serves. Clue: Michelle Rodriguez was sentenced to 60 days in jail, she was only in there 2 hours.

rufus-t-firefly Yeah, having actual consequences for your actions for the first time in your wasteful life can be very traumatizing.

ChEv3lle Maybe she'll grow the fark up and start acting like a normal adult human being than a spoiled brat princess. Or maybe not... I'm gonna go with not.

fish500 What's the over/under on her actual serving time. I'm gonna say she does 6 days.

I'm going with: 0
2007-05-15 04:12:05 PM  
I want to be the first to say it: Prison Pron Video.

It'll happen.
The Warden.
2007-05-15 04:27:46 PM
2007-05-15 04:35:14 PM  
Yet not one of you if you will admit that you'd hit it.
2007-05-15 04:35:42 PM  
oh, someone stuff a cock, er, sock in her already.
2007-05-15 04:40:25 PM  
She needs some more massage oil.
2007-05-15 04:49:05 PM  
Mumbler: she at least showed up in court

and once again...were she so law abiding she WOULD NOT BE IN COURT in the first place. She also made the choice to disobey a judges order NOT to drive and she did anyways...and drunk at that.

she was not treated the same as any average person charged with the same crime

no shiat, she's getting preferential treatment because of who she is and the size of her bank account. any of us would be proper farked.
2007-05-15 04:51:09 PM  
That website was horrible.

Reading the article would have been such a plus if you could actually see it over the grand maul seizure inducing advertisements.

/it makes me appreciate Fark more
2007-05-15 05:05:27 PM  
I like totally would hit it. Even marry it.
2007-05-15 05:07:48 PM  

wins the thread, but

unavailable for comment
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