FARK.com: (2794860) Step 1: Rob bishop. Step 2: Profit. Step 3: Return later to pizza shop next door, try to rob old woman and beat her with her own cane. Step 4: Profit? No

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		Step 1: Rob bishop. Step 2: Profit. Step 3: Return later to pizza shop next door, try to rob old woman and beat her with her own cane. Step 4: Profit? No (wnbc.com)		44
		More: Dumbass

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4901 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 May 2007 at 1:33 PM | Favorite | share:

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44 Comments (+0 »)

Archived thread

MasterThief		2007-05-10 11:43:38 AM

"Okay Devious, don't move!"
"THE BISHOP!"

/got nothin'

marcre3363		2007-05-10 11:55:37 AM

Police identified the suspect as 26-year-old Oluwafemi Olowofela

Is that his real name? Or did the Police Chief have a donut stuffed in his mouth during the press conference?

Gosling		2007-05-10 12:38:53 PM

Well, he's going to hell. Or reincarnated as yellow snow. Or reincarnated as yellow snow in hell.

SherKhan		2007-05-10 12:41:18 PM

Olowofela rooks Queens bishop. Moves one space over, gets pwned by off-duty knight.

Satan_Himself		2007-05-10 01:35:12 PM

Aren't headlines supposed to be funny?

MooseBayou		2007-05-10 01:39:03 PM

You're supposed to choke the bishop first.

ruthless_toothless		2007-05-10 01:39:17 PM

i always thought it was 'flog' the bishop

Mad Scientist		2007-05-10 01:40:42 PM

Cumbersome Headline of the Day Award Winner!

RadThad		2007-05-10 01:41:23 PM

Well done, SherKhan.

MattyBlast		2007-05-10 01:42:34 PM

Dangit, Sherkhan, now I've got tears running down my face. Farking spleen-busting hilarious!

man hands		2007-05-10 01:42:39 PM

I'm Rob Bishop (R-Utah), and I didn't profit from this message.

Aryman		2007-05-10 01:45:41 PM

that headline left a bad taste in my mouth.

ManBearPig		2007-05-10 01:50:12 PM

What was the suspect's name? Odolwa?

img293.imageshack.us

I Have Worms		2007-05-10 01:54:28 PM

""Okay Devious, don't move!"
"THE BISHOP!"

/got nothin'"

Is it strange that that was my first thought when i read the headline too?

Death_Poot		2007-05-10 01:54:59 PM

I thought you were supposed to beat the bishop.....

darwinsmonkey		2007-05-10 01:55:00 PM

Who's Rob Bishop?

T.rex		2007-05-10 02:04:10 PM

how dare they rob Bishop!
fusionanomaly.net

nickerj1		2007-05-10 02:08:24 PM

Bishop Melvin Artis Sr. said the three men entered the church at 4:20 p.m. and one robber went through his pockets while another held a gun.

Police said it happened in Saint Albans on Tuesday at the Greater Universal Highway Deliverance Church. The three men reportedly got away with around $1,500, police said.

Anyone else wondering why the Bishop has 1500 bucks in his pockets?

foosballcoach		2007-05-10 02:12:19 PM

Beat the bishop, spare the ..... old woman? Bust this clodfarks chops, and his buddies too.

Robert1966		2007-05-10 02:16:56 PM

So today's policy is to greenlight everything, or only submissions with lousy or incomprehensible headlines?

cftc		2007-05-10 02:17:19 PM

nickerj1

Anyone else wondering why the Bishop has 1500 bucks in his pockets?

It was his rent money. It was reported all over the local news.

BethDeathstrike!		2007-05-10 02:17:36 PM

T.rex

I knew it wouldn't take long.

rodeofrog		2007-05-10 02:17:55 PM

I'd like to buy a vowel.

NautACrazyAstro		2007-05-10 02:17:59 PM

Beat her with her own cane? Musta learned that one from the Poison Clan.

twohands		2007-05-10 02:18:12 PM

Police identified the suspect as 26-year-old Oluwafemi Olowofela

For he's an Olowofela
For he's an Olowofela
For he's an Olowofela
That nobody can pronounce

cerebulon13		2007-05-10 02:29:09 PM

Was I the only one who read it as Rob Bishop...as in a guy's name?

idrow		2007-05-10 02:38:55 PM

Future article: Police identified the suspect as 26-year-old ~~Oluwafemi Olowofela~~ Urhines Kendall Icy Eight Special K.

Baron Von Supercock		2007-05-10 02:40:48 PM

My uncle is named Rob Bishop, so Im really getting a kick out of these replies

/seriously
//not about the replies

D-Liver		2007-05-10 02:55:53 PM

thats the worst headline I have ever seen on fark

wruley		2007-05-10 03:10:36 PM

Police identified the suspect as 26-year-old Oluwafemi Olowofela.

If you re-arrange the letters in his name you get:

"We foil a male fool" with "u ow" left over.

/He should have totally seen this coming!

chaotey		2007-05-10 03:27:21 PM

NY1 has footage of this winner complete with his transformation from "tough guy gangsta" to "wimpy little sissy"

dstaggs		2007-05-10 03:28:04 PM

No Jean Valjean references? Fark, you guys are retards.

RadioactiveApe		2007-05-10 03:30:25 PM

I want to rub olowofela on your vajayjay

nykkel		2007-05-10 04:15:17 PM

dstaggs
No Jean Valjean references? Fark, you guys are retards.

I came to the thread to see if anyone had made a Les Mis reference too. Guess the 'beating the bishop' remarks come more easily to mind for most Farkers, for some reason.

gnobesav		2007-05-10 04:33:15 PM

dstaggs: No Jean Valjean references? Fark, you guys are retards.

Thirded.

bottsicus		2007-05-10 04:55:46 PM

Polish the bishop?

/"roughing up the suspect" FTW

Mor Beal		2007-05-10 06:12:49 PM

FTA: Police identified the suspect as 26-year-old Oluwafemi Olowofela.

What's he doing robbing churches in NYC when with that name he could be making so much more money sending people emails in which he promises millions of dollars from a bank in Sierra Leone?

just4now88		2007-05-10 07:37:47 PM

Is that his real name? Or did the Police Chief have a donut stuffed in his mouth during the press conference?

Yes that's his real name. He's Nigerian.

FriarReb98		2007-05-10 07:49:05 PM

Not impressed. (Especially with most of the people in this thread.)

MattyBlast		2007-05-10 07:56:18 PM

Ownedluwafemi Ownedlowofela

benmecha		2007-05-10 08:11:36 PM

"O RLY?"

CzarChasm		2007-05-10 10:27:53 PM

Robbing a bishop?

tbn0.google.com

// Not impressed.

Somacandra		2007-05-10 10:44:30 PM

nykkel: I came to the thread to see if anyone had made a Les Mis reference too. Guess the 'beating the bishop' remarks come more easily to mind for most Farkers, for some reason.

You forgot I gave these also. Would you leave the best behind?