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(How Stuff Works)   How teleportation will work   (howstuffworks.com) divider line 36
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2712 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Jul 2001 at 9:40 AM (13 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2001-07-08 10:08:00 AM
Cecil Adams to the rescue again:

http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a5_198.html
 
2001-07-08 10:56:50 AM
no more of this stupid BULLSHlT!!! these how stuff works articles FARKING SUCK!
 
2001-07-08 11:18:15 AM
If we had one of these teleporters we could test it out on France and send it to the moon. All in the name of science of course.
 
2001-07-08 11:55:34 AM
Wraith and all those other farkers who rant whenever there is a new HowStuffWorks on Fark here, You should probably realize that the whoever submitts it is probably doing it to piss ou off. they get off on you flipping out about it.


Your Lord and Party Saviour,

Buddy Jesus
 
2001-07-08 12:03:32 PM
I've always had a problem with teleporting/transporting technology. What they propose is to disassemble the traveller's body, thereby killing him/her/it, transforming the information from his atoms into data, sending that information somewhere else, and reassembling a doppelganger who very closely resembles who that person used to be. This clone will believe itself to be the same person who was sent, and the real traveller will die.

And people are looking forward to this?
 
2001-07-08 12:36:34 PM
"In performing their experiment, the Caltech group was able to get around the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle, the main barrier for teleportation of objects larger than a photon."

isn't everything bigger than a photon, except a photon?

pretty dire selection of articles today ..
 
2001-07-08 12:41:44 PM
And to think this was slected over my own submission:

Fark #2 on Google Search for "Fark #1 on Google Search for Fark #1"
 
2001-07-08 12:44:56 PM
Flakeloaf: Yes, that I was I thinking. Our consciousness is not a construct of the atoms in our brains; therefore reforming them will not create the original "I". You'd have to have a way of transporting whatever consciousness is before this would have any use to humans. Though it'd be a killer way to commit suicide :P

I think their description of the HUP is a bit off. I was under the impression HUP applied to ALL subatomic particles.
 
2001-07-08 12:50:48 PM
This one cracks me up:
Molecules couldn't be even a millimeter out of place, lest the person arrive with some severe neurological or physiological defect
Uh... Millimeter? Off by about six powers of ten, at least.

A thought: "Well - there ain't gonna be no easy way, that's for sure". Look at TV: you take apart an image pixel by pixel, measure each pixel (RGB or whatever), multiplex, send, and reassemble at the other end. Repeat a couple of dozen times per second, and hey presto - magic.
Same goes for teleportation. "Yew jes' take 'em apart atum by atum, measure, multiplex, send 'n reassemble." Easy. Oh yeah - you have to do it all in a fraction of a heartbeat, else the heart won't fit back together. Hm. Maybe we freeze them first? Oh - that kills them? Oh dear. Oh well.
 
2001-07-08 01:04:25 PM
duh, simple
 
2001-07-08 01:08:30 PM
Hmmmm..... quickly transporting 1020TB of data, reassembling it all simultaneously without surrounding particles interferring and reassembling everything with velocity and movement so as not to recreate an exact corpse of the now dead person being transported.... hmmm.... absolutely believable, I don't see how we could NOT DO IT!

....except for one teensy little problem that keeps going through my head. "Honey?! HONEY! I CAN'T TELL WHAT YOU'RE SAYING! YOU'RE BREAKING UP ON ME!" *loud crackely hiss* *beep beep beep*
 
2001-07-08 01:21:06 PM
Just beam me up Scotty. For God's sake man, BEAM ME U........................................
 
2001-07-08 01:48:49 PM
My personal fave was "Scotty, beam me aboard. Ow!"

The receiving chamber would have to be evacuated before the recently-deceased victim could be copied inside it. It'd really suck to create a blood vessel around an air pocket.
 
2001-07-08 01:53:09 PM
Hey Flakeloaf - just be happy your articles are actually getting submitted. Must be nice. From now on I'm just going to have to paste the URLs into my comments.

-he who stacks pork
 
2001-07-08 01:57:27 PM
In "Timeline" by Michael Crichton they overcame the problem of transporting massive amounts of data by emplying lossy compression algorithms.

Thus an interesting plot device.
 
2001-07-08 02:10:46 PM
To quote Scott Adams:
"Teleportation will never work because it depends on trust and co-operation from your co-workers. These are the same guys who don't bother to make a fresh pot of coffee when they finish the last one off, or add papaer to the photocopier. I don't think they'll be rechecking the teleportation co-ordinates. They'll be beaming people into walls, pets and furniture"
 
2001-07-08 03:12:23 PM
Don't panic.
 
2001-07-08 03:13:32 PM
Ouch, thought that read DOUGLAS Adams...Fark really needs a post editor thingie...
 
2001-07-08 03:31:30 PM
Spacegoat, Crichton unfortunately still glazed over three very important problems with lossy compression.

rant>

1) Even being ultra generous with the compression (say 80%) you'd still be talking about a file size ranging in the hundreds of trillions of terrabytes for say an average person.

2) Having a brief history in data imaging, even the least compressed lossy compression is still losing important data (thus the term "lossy", you get compression through losing data and replacing it with a rough facsimile of it). It's just presented in such a way that you don't really notice. This is the reason places like Kinko's archive bitmap images in TIFF or BMP files instead of JPEG. No loss of quality.

3) Even if you could successfully use lossy compression without actually losing any data, the data transfer would have to be a one shot data dump from one place to the other and just losing one percent of the compressed data would result in losing (still at 80%) four times the information. Considering this information has to be so exact that if sub-atomic placement is off by less than one nanometer you have problems, you're screwed. Imagine what would happen if, say, four percent of your body's information was lost and just missing.

This is why I don't like Michael Crichton... he only knows enough about computers, math and science to really get himself into trouble if he was actually trying this stuff, like me. If you're going to be technical when you write, get it right to begin with... otherwise don't try and explain. (i.e. Gene Roddenberry who only devised the teleportation gimmic so he didn't have to figure out a way to land the damn spaceship on a low budget sci-fi soap opera.)

/rant>

Sorry, had to get that one off my chest for a few years now. France surrendered. Go back to your farking.
 
2001-07-08 03:32:44 PM
*smacking head* stupid attempt at tag workaround...
 
2001-07-08 03:33:23 PM
This is why I like my car. If something is slightly out of place, and it stops working in the middle of my trip, I can always get out and call a mechanic. No wondering if my consciousness is going to catch up with my newly-created body, or if I'm going to have to watch from afar as a clone of myself goes about my old daily life.

And if the power flickers for even a microsecond, my new body is just a heap of quivering, bloody meat? No thanks. I've seen The Fly plenty of times. Give me a bus pass.
 
2001-07-08 04:17:59 PM
"mmm thirty cents huh? and it only transports matter?"
 
2001-07-08 05:53:32 PM
And how exactly would you get the molecules vibrating exactly enough to make the person materalise at the right temperature, and keeping them together, as well as making those molecules keep moving the way they were before demateralisation?

Crap! People should realise Star Trek is not what is going to happen. If teleportation is possible it`ll happen through wormholes or stretching/compressing space so there becomes here.
 
2001-07-08 07:12:47 PM
Buddy: That kind of trolling would require the participation of Fark staff. Surely Drew isn't knowingly alienating his readers for the joy of it. I'm guessing he really likes this crap like he used to like Ananova. Complaints might be useful to getting him to stop, even if they do tickle the contributor.
 
2001-07-08 07:48:58 PM
How about "It won't work". Stupid trekkie losers
 
2001-07-08 08:52:35 PM
I believe they may be talking about quantum mechanical teleportation, where particles just disappear from one place and appear at another. This effect has been observed with photons (jump across an opaque barrier); I don't know about particles. Theoretically this effect could happen with macroscopic objects, but it is phenomenally unlikely. To quote some book that I read, "Don't bother running at the prison wall in an attempt to teleport out."

Actually, I didn't read the article. But this is what could be talking about.
 
2001-07-08 09:22:06 PM
I atualy think that if you consider it, it's bad.

You are not in control. Your gone
Your clone lives on. But your gone.

When they create a replica, it may be the same mind make up, but not the same one controlling the mind. Your gone, but your spirit lives on.
 
2001-07-08 09:28:44 PM
Replica - Fear Factory

There is no love

I am a duplication
innocently
I was conceived
so violently
There was no love
There was no love for me
There was only hatred.

I am rape (c)
I am hate
I am rape
I am hate

Every day I feel anonymouse hate (b)
Forever in the shadow of disgrace.
(c)

Filled with pain (b2)
a bruised and darkened soul
spare me from the
life that's full of misery
I don't want to live that way
I don't want to live that way

There is no love
(b)
(c)

Filled with pain
A bruised and darkened soul
spare me from the life that's filled with misery
(b2) x3
 
2001-07-09 12:09:59 AM
spare me the pathetic goth whining.
 
2001-07-09 01:27:30 AM
Just decided to say the song. Actualy, it isn't really relevant here. Ohh well, you choose to read it. Can't blame me for that.
 
2001-07-09 02:07:27 AM
Um, Fear Factory != goth ...
 
2001-07-09 02:40:46 AM
"GOTH " = code word used by trolls for anyone who wears black nail polish
 
2001-07-09 03:53:50 AM
Transactoid: Our consciousness is not a construct of the atoms in our brains

And you know this ... how?

I've read "Consciousness Explained" by Dennett and I'm currently reading "The Origin of Consciousness in the Breakdown of the Bicameral Mind" by Jaynes. Neither of them (from what I could tell) would agree with you. I know I don't.

Just my opinion.
 
2001-07-09 03:55:06 AM
Speaking of teleportation, on certain browsers, you can teleport ...

TEXT!

It's technically possible, but annoying. Therefore, it should not be done.
 
2001-07-09 02:40:06 PM
Theoretically, unless there is something beyond atoms that makes us (yes, and the smaller particles), it would be the makeup of your brain, how everything was linked.

Hmm, therefore, with a lot of research, you can make people the same. Finding ways to slightly modify the chemical makeup of your brain, and change the person. Lovely isn't it?
 
2001-07-09 02:53:35 PM
I just re-read "The Jaunt" by Steven King Sunday. It's a short story in Skeleton Crew. Right on topic. Teleportees had to be asleep for their consciousness to arrive at the same time. Interesting read.
 
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