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(Some Guy)   Man steals $1 paycheck (third item)   (citizen-times.com) divider line 61
    More: Dumbass  
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12524 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Mar 2007 at 1:14 PM (7 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2007-03-23 09:28:36 AM
I got an 82 cent check in the mail the other day, the last bits of a disbursement I took last year. Still haven't decided what to do with it.
 
2007-03-23 09:46:42 AM
Ah, the good ole Citizen-Times. They put out a free paper for Waynesville that is vastly superior than the drivel the Mountaineer prints.
 
2007-03-23 09:59:24 AM
 
2007-03-23 11:03:13 AM
I once received a check full of asterisks. Everything was, and mine was the only one like that.

Unfortunately, I had to turn it in before I could get my real check.
 
2007-03-23 11:08:54 AM
I got an international cheque for $12 and it cost me $12 to cash it.
 
2007-03-23 01:17:50 PM
So that's where my last paycheck went!
 
2007-03-23 01:18:23 PM
I got an 82 cent check in the mail the other day, the last bits of a disbursement I took last year. Still haven't decided what to do with it.

Cash it?
 
2007-03-23 01:20:06 PM
Another day, another dollar?

/obscure?
 
2007-03-23 01:21:05 PM
stebain

I once received a check full of asterisks. Everything was, and mine was the only one like that.

Asterisks are wild cards - you missed a golden opportunity!

:-)
 
2007-03-23 01:21:24 PM
very weird.
further down is the couple getting arrested for their kids missing school. why would a parent want their kid home from school 33,45 days??
that's 2-3 months worth. doesn't make sense.
 
2007-03-23 01:21:34 PM
I like how it was stolen from 'Precision Accounting'. The question is, was it Precisely One dalla?
 
2007-03-23 01:22:30 PM
*groinpunches SocrapticMethod*
 
2007-03-23 01:22:48 PM
I got an international cheque for $12 and it cost me $12 to cash it.

At least it wasn't for $11.
 
2007-03-23 01:23:52 PM
Only 999,999 more and he'll be a millionaire.
 
2007-03-23 01:24:10 PM
kimwim: very weird.
further down is the couple getting arrested for their kids missing school. why would a parent want their kid home from school 33,45 days??
that's 2-3 months worth. doesn't make sense.


It does when you look at one of the other items:

Town police arrested a man for buying alcohol for a 13- and 14-year-old and taking indecent liberties with one of the minors, warrants said

Maybe he was the school janitor?
 
2007-03-23 01:24:12 PM
Why "dumbass"? I mean, if there was a choice of $10000, $500, $7263 and $1 checks and he only got the $1, then yes, he'd be that.

But what if there were no other checks?
 
2007-03-23 01:24:41 PM
Was he drunk? Maybe he looked at it and saw a string of 1's and thought it was a check for evelenbillionty dollars.
 
2007-03-23 01:26:47 PM
The Glass Dragon: I got an 82 cent check in the mail the other day, the last bits of a disbursement I took last year. Still haven't decided what to do with it.

Cash it?


Change it?
 
2007-03-23 01:27:43 PM
I thought it was pronounced Elevendy Billion Dollars.


IXI, I can't when parents don't give a shiat about their kids' edjumacashon. it leeds two bad adulthooding.
 
2007-03-23 01:27:50 PM
2007-03-23 01:24:12 PM grundes
Why "dumbass"? I mean, if there was a choice of $10000, $500, $7263 and $1 checks and he only got the $1, then yes, he'd be that.

But what if there were no other checks?


Then he's a dumbass for stealing anything. If it's a choice between a $1 check and an additional charge on the criminal report, and no $1 check, I would gladly discard the check every time.
 
2007-03-23 01:28:09 PM
The check was worth $1.00. The check wasn't made out for $1.00. He was going to make the check out for a large amount. The police had to put a value on the BLANK check.
 
2007-03-23 01:29:40 PM
I hear that the case of aiding and abetting a breaking and entering was open and shut.

/got nothing
 
2007-03-23 01:32:34 PM
Glad I don't work at Precision Accounting
 
2007-03-23 01:34:33 PM
is that $1 before or after taxes?
 
2007-03-23 01:34:34 PM
SocrapticMethod: Another day, another dollar?

Nothing is obscure on Fark! Calvin's dad says that while shaving in a strip in which Calvin makes fun of him for having to go to work.
 
2007-03-23 01:36:04 PM
Stole his $1 paycheck, eh? Was he spending the whole work-day on Fark?
 
2007-03-23 01:36:18 PM
ToxicMunkee
Was he drunk? Maybe he looked at it and saw a string of 1's and thought it was a check for evelenbillionty dollars.

With that kind of dyslexia, he's got to be a riot in CS.

"OMG N00b!!!!1!11!1!1!one"
 
2007-03-23 01:40:06 PM
I'm getting a $50,000 check from a Nigerian prince. All I have to do is deposit it into my checking account, wire him $40,000 through Western Union, and keep $10,000 for my troubles.

He said it was 100% risk free and he was a good Christian so I know I can trust him.
 
2007-03-23 01:40:51 PM
Even better item: Mother arrested for having kids absent from school for a month school also charged for failing to appear in court. (last item)
 
2007-03-23 01:41:25 PM
woo hoo! My first approved link!
 
2007-03-23 01:43:11 PM
what were the other two items that the man stole?
 
2007-03-23 01:44:11 PM
Snarky_Chique

Stop bringing informed and intelligent analysis to the thread. What are you, new here? ;)
 
2007-03-23 01:44:52 PM
ncjason: woo hoo! My first approved link!

Bah...I hope it's a dupe. :D

Just kidding. Congrats on your de-virgination
 
2007-03-23 01:46:15 PM
taking indecent liberties with a minor

So is it ok to take decent liberties with a minor?
 
2007-03-23 01:49:08 PM
well this did happen in asheville. it was probably some dreadlocked wook who needed to buy kibble for his mangy dogs.
 
2007-03-23 01:50:52 PM
crazycooter: So is it ok to take decent liberties with a minor?

only in Social Studies class
 
2007-03-23 01:51:12 PM
What exactly is an indecent liberty? Does that mean he farked the kid?
 
2007-03-23 01:52:11 PM
It could just be a typo.
 
2007-03-23 01:53:53 PM
GE keeps sending me checks for $.01, the dividend of some GE stock that I had converted, although they obviously didn't convert quite all of it.
 
2007-03-23 01:54:06 PM
img.villagephotos.com
 
2007-03-23 01:54:44 PM
Am I really the only person to notice that half of the people listed as arrested in that column all live on the same street?
 
2007-03-23 01:55:40 PM
$300 gross
- 45 federal
- 22 state
- 36 FICA
- 12 dues
- 75 insurance
- 17 uniforms
- 35 credit union
- 57 child support
= $1 net
 
2007-03-23 02:03:57 PM
I just bet the police will have 8 x 10 glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back.
 
2007-03-23 02:06:01 PM
Most the people in that police blotter lived on Future Street. It sounds like most of them are always blotted and have no future
 
2007-03-23 02:09:23 PM
when i worked for fairmont hotels one winter, my roommate got a negative paycheck. it was an actual legal check that said she had to pay money that month.

our rent and food was deducted from the checks.. thats why it was negative, but still! who prints out negative checks!
 
2007-03-23 02:12:35 PM
I got a 15 cent check for jury duty once, that's what you get for being honest about where you live especially when the courthouse is less than a mile away. Never cashed the damn thing, still have it somewhere.
 
2007-03-23 02:45:28 PM
img241.imageshack.us

/borrowed from owlet post
//very appropriate for this thread
 
2007-03-23 02:51:30 PM
At least now he'll only have a $2,999 fine to pay - considering of course they let him keep the check.
 
2007-03-23 02:55:34 PM
Pocket Ninja - I got an 82 cent check in the mail the other day, the last bits of a disbursement I took last year. Still haven't decided what to do with it.

Endorse it and leave it as a tip.
 
2007-03-23 02:55:47 PM
Thats nothing I got note from the IRS that my taxes were done wrong in 2005 and they owe me nine cents! They still haven't sent me a check though. Maybe I should tell them to give it to charity for Iraqis whose lives are screwed up because of the war. But then I guess it would only go to Halliburton or to line someone else's pocket.
 
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