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(News.com.au)   School teachers to receive training to assist children allergic to chocolate, peanut butter, etc. Training course to run about 9.5 weeks   (news.com.au) divider line 99
    More: Spiffy  
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2321 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Feb 2007 at 6:42 AM (7 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2007-02-21 11:06:15 PM
I see what you did there
 
2007-02-21 11:12:31 PM
Benadryl and an epi-pen. Voila. Trained.

/no strawberries?
 
2007-02-21 11:19:20 PM
orrinbloquy: I don't..
 
2007-02-21 11:55:46 PM
Chariset: I don't..

Explanation
(NSFW)
 
2007-02-21 11:55:53 PM
Chariset: Have you ever seen the movie 9 1/2 Weeks?
 
2007-02-22 12:37:14 AM
Chocolate allergies? WTF!
 
2007-02-22 12:41:03 AM
Nice. +1
 
2007-02-22 12:42:05 AM
Meh. The headline is painful like requiring a joke to be explained to you. Yeah I got the connection but it was a reach.
 
2007-02-22 12:50:55 AM
Reach? Hardly.
I'm just embarrassed for the subby because he probably sat through the film.
 
2007-02-22 01:25:55 AM
img400.imageshack.us
 
2007-02-22 02:19:10 AM
School teachers to receive training to assist children with food allergies to chocolate, peanut butter, teachers having sex with them



who knows some kid might
 
2007-02-22 06:59:13 AM
well done subby, +1
 
2007-02-22 07:03:18 AM
Jiffy tag?
 
2007-02-22 07:06:55 AM
orrinbloquy:
Explanation (NSFW)

Huh. No girl ever let me blindfold her on the first date.

(Anyway I liked the food sex scene in "Hot Shots" better)
 
2007-02-22 07:09:02 AM
nice subby, +1.
Ya know, when I was a kid I don't remember any other kids having all of these crazy allergies that are around today! what gives?
 
2007-02-22 07:13:44 AM
img233.imageshack.us
 
2007-02-22 07:20:05 AM
@FiFiFoFark Its strange i'm allergic to fish and shellfish while my daughter is allergic to peanuts
 
2007-02-22 07:21:50 AM
It's very simple:

G.W. Carver High School

Peanuts all day every day! Within a week, there won't even be peanut allergies anymore.

/Kid tested, Darwin approved.
 
2007-02-22 07:22:31 AM
I think the Darwin method is the best way to deal with this.
 
2007-02-22 07:25:01 AM
"Ya know, when I was a kid I don't remember any other kids having all of these crazy allergies that are around today! what gives?"

They warned us this would happen. it's the result of Peanutbutter Cup abuse, Reeses babies!
 
2007-02-22 07:33:10 AM
FeFiFoFark: Ya know, when I was a kid I don't remember any other kids having all of these crazy allergies that are around today! what gives?

Because today's kids are so fawking sterilized it's beyond funny.

Plus people overreact to everything.

Plus schools always follow the mantra less make hundreds miserable for the sake of one.

/likes to throw peanuts at people with allergies. EAT A PEANUT YOU fark
 
2007-02-22 07:36:10 AM
glycol.wetworks.org
 
2007-02-22 07:42:46 AM
No Such Agency:

You DO realize that Hot Shots was a satire of other films and that the food sex was- oh, fark it. Either you're being a smart-ass or you'll never get it.
 
2007-02-22 07:55:54 AM
Sometimes I want to side with Chris Rock: "You think anybody in muthafarkin' Rwanda has a food allergy?"
 
2007-02-22 08:00:28 AM
I had a friend in junior high who got a headache after eating a tuna sandwich at my house so his mom declared he was allergic to tuna.
 
2007-02-22 08:03:05 AM
Kudos headline writer. Kudos.

The teachers can keep their hats on, too.
 
2007-02-22 08:05:39 AM
just one more responsibility for underpaid teachers!
 
2007-02-22 08:05:59 AM
I had this when I was a kid...growing up in rural MI, didn't care, tramped around the woods, got stung by bees, etc. No biggie.
2 years after moving to Houston while still a kid, I had to get weekly shots and keep epinephrine kit in the fridge in case I got stung. I am certain there's an industrial/environmental cause to this.
 
2007-02-22 08:06:50 AM
I say that because of all these dangerous chocolate allergies all schools need to be 'no chocolate' zones and kids that bring chocolate to school should be expelled for endangering the lives of the other kids.

/Personal responsibility has been shot in the head, buried, dug back up, raped, burned, reburied, and is still spinnng fast enough to power the eastern seaboard.
 
2007-02-22 08:08:35 AM
This would be funnier if my niece wasn't dying from food allergies.

www.faithfriendlyworld.com
 
2007-02-22 08:15:45 AM
vertigo32: I say that because of all these dangerous chocolate allergies all schools need to be 'no chocolate' zones and kids that bring chocolate to school should be expelled for endangering the lives of the other kids.

Ironically, there are some school districts that have instituted such rules.
 
2007-02-22 08:23:25 AM
red headed stranger

I know...it's pathetic. If you are so unhealthy that you can't be around common food without almost dying and you aren't smart enough to keep benadryl or an epipen handy should be darwined out. It's their parents fault for keeping the kids in a freaking clean room and not training their immune systems properly...how can that be healthy?

My opinion is that if you aren't healthy enough to be around common food, either get in a bubble or go to a private / homeschool. People have allergies to every single food out there. Corn, wheat, beef, chicken, fish, nuts, veggies, etc. Are we going to ban all food in general from schools or something? What about people who have to eat kosher and might accidentally or unknowingly ingest non-kosher foods?

Where the fark does this stop? If I was a parent I would want to be compensated for my kid not being able to eat the cheap, plentiful, and goodness that is a PBJ sandwich for lunch. Nothing is easier, faster, or cheaper then slapping one of those together...they taste pretty good, and they don't need any special care.
 
2007-02-22 08:23:42 AM
moonrock: I had this when I was a kid...growing up in rural MI, didn't care, tramped around the woods, got stung by bees, etc. No biggie.
2 years after moving to Houston while still a kid, I had to get weekly shots and keep epinephrine kit in the fridge in case I got stung. I am certain there's an industrial/environmental cause to this.


Definitely can be. Me and my sister both have respiratory issues; asthma for both of us, chemical sensitivies for me as well. No history on either side of our family.

Graduates from my high school class and the few after are running at about a 30% incidence of respiratory issues. The school was shut down and destroyed a few years after I graduated, because they discovered a mold problem so severe the cleanup would cost more than building a new school somewhere else. They'd also had "environmental" days, where they thought someone had released something into the vents, and sent everyone home.


Definitely environmental, in that case.


That said, if your allergies prevent you from functioning in the real world, then your parents can bloody well homeschool you, or put you in a private school that caters to these kinds of problems. There's no reason a school should have to be made peanut-free just for one kid. If they're so sensitive that other kids eating peanuts is an issue, then they're going to be in rather significant trouble when they graduate, and can't control the people in their workplace/on the street/etc. Better to learn to cope early.
 
2007-02-22 08:29:48 AM
Food allergies are God's way of saying "you've got bad parents".
 
2007-02-22 08:41:59 AM
1st Day of Training:

Role playing -

Timmy: Mrs. Snodgrass, I am allergic to X.
Mrs. Snodgrass: Okay Timmy, do not eat X.

----------------------------------------------
CERTIFICATE OF COMPLETION
----------------------------------------------
This certificate certifies that Mrs. Snodgrass has passed
basic food and allergy training 101.
 
2007-02-22 08:42:12 AM
Food Allergies are God's way of saying "I dont love you"
 
2007-02-22 08:53:00 AM
Meet Us at the Stick [TotalFark]
Have you ever seen the movie 9 1/2 Weeks?

am I the only person who thought that movie sucked?
 
2007-02-22 09:06:53 AM
That was really creepy subby.
 
2007-02-22 09:07:01 AM
I'm allergic to chocolate, as is my mom, as was my grandfather. My mom has the most severe reaction. Last time she had a coffee cake with some in it her throat started swelling up until she couldn't breath. My dad had to pour Benadryl down her throat to save her.

/could be worse
//I could be allergic to latex
///or beer (shiver)
 
2007-02-22 09:08:51 AM
epi-pen
I think I read somewhere that there where more medical problems resulting in death of kids in .au because of over use of epi pens than lives were saved because of their use but its 1am so I'm not about to find a real reference.
 
2007-02-22 09:12:33 AM
vertigo32

"It's their parents fault for keeping the kids in a freaking clean room and not training their immune systems properly...how can that be healthy?"

Hold up right there. My son is allergic to peanuts and this statement is far from the truth. Kid grew up like any other kid. Eating dirt. Playing with worms and bugs. Strange though the sterile white clean room wasn't anywhere around.
 
2007-02-22 09:13:19 AM
Bob Dolemite: just one more responsibility for underpaid teachers!

Underpaid my aunt fanny.
 
2007-02-22 09:18:09 AM
thogard, the adrenaline administered by these epi pens aren't like insulin; They're very safe.

While they'll definitly have an effect if you shoot them into a random person, unless there's something seriously wrong with them it won't have any lasting effect.
 
2007-02-22 09:19:16 AM
I've said this in other peanut allergy + school threads and I guess I'll say it again:

ANYONE with a severe allergy, like peanuts, needs to be responsible for THEM SELF and take the necessary precautions. Now I know some bleeding hearts are thinking, "But Bender, little kids don't know how to do that! We need to ban peanut butter from schools to protect them!"

WRONG! Who is responsible for a kid before they can be responsible for them self? Their parents. So parents need to step up and give their special needs kid special help. Maybe this means home schooling their kid until he or she is old enough to know how to take care of them self in relation to their allergy.

"But Bender, I'm too busy/lazy/don't want to home school my kid. It's the public school's responsibility to keep my kid safe!"

WRONG! It's the parent's responsibility to keep their kid safe. And do you think parents of severely handicapped (physically or mentally) children like having to do all the special needs work they do? Hell no! But that's part of the responsibility of being a parent.

So take responsibility for yourself and your children. If you or your child has special needs, it is your responsibility to take care of that. It is not the public's responsibility to change to suit your needs.

/training teachers to help in allergy situations is entirely a good thing though.
 
2007-02-22 09:30:07 AM
Honest Bender: So take responsibility for yourself and your children. If you or your child has special needs, it is your responsibility to take care of that. It is not the public's responsibility to change to suit your needs.

Just wanted to reiterate this, as an epi-pen needing soon-to-be teacher.

It's my own damn responsibility to take care of myself. Until your kids are old enough to be responsible for themselves, it's the parents' responsibility to care for them. Up to and including keeping them out of situations their allergies are affected by.

Demanding a school to not have any peanut products is just about as silly as demanding a public park have no pollens in the air. If you have sensitivities, there are some things you can't bloody do. Better to realize that early and learn how to cope.
 
2007-02-22 09:30:12 AM
Subby +1. DNRTFA - came in here just to say that!
 
2007-02-22 09:31:33 AM
These are the threads that make me hate most farkers.
 
2007-02-22 09:37:30 AM
gmstudio

These are the threads that make me hate most farkers.

Oh, please elaborate. Even better if you can actually explain your position...and if you can do it in a rational manner instead of 'but, but it's everyones responsibility to care for my kid'.

Let's say my kid has an auto-immune disorder and any exposure to the cold, flu, or any other disease might kill them. Should it be a reasonable expectation that the public school provide a clean-room environment and require that all of the other students be sterilized and screened for any diseases that may kill my kid? If a kid does come in with the sniffles, should they be expelled for not staying home?

Or should my kid stay where they belong - in the hospital or my home where I can adequately care for them?
 
2007-02-22 09:44:45 AM
gmstudio: These are the threads that make me hate most farkers.

I'm guessing you mean Farkers like me, Honest Bender, and vertigo32.

And like vertigo32 said, what, you prefer that your child be coddled and never learn to handle their issues themselves, so that when walking down the street one day, when someone eating a candy bar (with peanuts) coughs in their direction, they go into shock and die?

Right. That's the better way to go. Hell, I've got chemical sensitivities and a toxic reaction to some molds (similar reaction as peanut allergies and bee sting allergies; throat closes off, etc). Do I demand that nobody ever wear perfume? No. I farking deal with my problems my own damn self. Why should the world change to benefit you? Who made you so damn special?

We need to stop telling kids they're special. That's what's led to this attitude. They're not. Millions of em out there. They're unique, but so is every bloody grain of sand on a beach.
 
2007-02-22 09:45:06 AM
Beautiful headline.

gmstudio: These are the threads that make me hate most farkers

That's ok, we don't care much for you either.
 
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