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(Telegraph)   Injured leader of al-Qa'eda in Iraq now not injured. Bonus: He wasn't even at the fighting   (telegraph.co.uk) divider line 45
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1979 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Feb 2007 at 11:50 AM (7 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



45 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2007-02-16 11:54:06 AM
Of course not. He's being tortured right now.
 
2007-02-16 11:54:07 AM
Ooops, they did it again.

/not that innocent
 
2007-02-16 11:54:12 AM
Wake me up when they finally catch Emanuel Goldstien... err I mean Osama Bin Laden.
 
2007-02-16 11:54:30 AM
He was actually too busy shaving his cat's balls next to the swimming pool to be near any combat operations.
 
2007-02-16 11:55:21 AM
My god we cant even wound a guy in custody any more. Is there anything we can do right any more?!?!? Russia thinks were trying to take over the world? hell we cant even secure a third world nation.

/we need to stop sucking at this.
 
2007-02-16 11:55:28 AM
Guy isn't Hitler, should be easier than that.
 
2007-02-16 11:55:31 AM
Give it 2 weeks and they'll report he's been killed in some fire fight.

/And show the blown up body.
 
2007-02-16 11:56:46 AM
In fact, he doesn't even exist. Turns out howie mandell is in charge of al qaeda.
 
2007-02-16 11:58:58 AM
you know seeing how the leader of al qaeda dies every day or every month, i would seriously reconsider if i was promoted inside of al qaeda.... people dont know who you are yet call you the leader of al qaeda
 
2007-02-16 11:58:59 AM
Go Go Iraqi Intelligence!
 
2007-02-16 11:59:05 AM
"Good lord get the story out NOW! No time to make sure it's accurate, I said NOW DAMMIT gotta beat those bastards at [insert news organization here]"

/Fact checking surrenders
 
2007-02-16 11:59:24 AM
It was all fabricated to take our minds of Anna Nicole Smith.

/what war?
 
2007-02-16 11:59:34 AM
But Iran totally gave the guy some muskets or something, the unnamed source told me so.
 
2007-02-16 11:59:44 AM
Any word on his second-in-command?

/second-in-command #103 or so
 
2007-02-16 12:00:01 PM
Howie: Jihad, or NO Jihad?

I'm going with my gut here, Howie - Jihad baby!
 
2007-02-16 12:01:16 PM
Another victory for our intelligence agencies

makes you wonder about that whole cold war thing
 
2007-02-16 12:01:40 PM
topicstock.pantip.com

That's nice work boys.
 
2007-02-16 12:03:07 PM
Al-Qa'eda leader in Iraq: "There are WMD's around here somewhere. George Bush says so. He would not have sent his troops in here for no good reason. We must find them before he does."
 
2007-02-16 12:03:45 PM
Now you see him, now you don't.

Rasputin-like prestidigitation.
 
2007-02-16 12:03:55 PM
Psych! They sure had us going there.
 
2007-02-16 12:04:03 PM
Meh, I like how the Russians handle things... blowing shiat up, asking questions later. Heh, they even tell their media STFU and GBTW. God bless their commie Stalinist souls! *tears*

/Spetznaz rule
//got wood when I saw what they did to the Moscow theater Chechen terrorists
 
2007-02-16 12:04:12 PM
square
Another victory for our intelligence agencies

makes you wonder about that whole cold war thing



Story was from the Iraq Military. It was US Military intelligence that said it was bogus.

/RTFA
 
2007-02-16 12:05:50 PM
You got to be a stupid motherfarker to get fired on your day off.
 
2007-02-16 12:05:58 PM
ultraholland

Howie: Jihad, or NO Jihad?

I'm going with my gut here, Howie - Jihad baby!


Brilliant post. Thx for the guffaw.
 
2007-02-16 12:07:38 PM
...wait, I'm confused. What does this have to do with our impending war with Iran?

/ Iraq?
// Dude, that is soooooo 2003.
 
2007-02-16 12:07:55 PM
and ummmmm the guy escaped and aaaaaah he was wounded 5 no 200 times and and he was driving a truck load of WMD. Sure sure and the truck had a bumper sticker that said vote for Clinton in English and another one too that said Obama. A guy I know that works for Halliburton called me and told me He knows somebody that knows somebody that heard about the whole thing
 
2007-02-16 12:08:38 PM
Kanemano

You got to be a stupid motherfarker to get fired on your day off.

Heh. No shidt. I wasn't fired, but laid off, on my day off. Called me into the office to say goodbye. Laid off or canned, it all feels the same.

Bonus? It was my birthday.
 
2007-02-16 12:10:31 PM
WayneKerr: He was actually too busy shaving his cat's balls next to the swimming pool to be near any combat operations.

Did he have a scanner with him too?
 
2007-02-16 12:20:45 PM
Just wait for that guy to experience:

ineedattention.com
 
2007-02-16 12:26:44 PM
what happened to surge? I got about 40 cans at a hockey tournament about a year before they went public with it. loved it, but couldnt find it anywhere.
 
2007-02-16 12:31:43 PM
Military Intelligence

What a great oxymoron.
 
2007-02-16 12:35:46 PM
mathmatix

you know seeing how the leader of al qaeda dies every day or every month, i would seriously reconsider if i was promoted inside of al qaeda.... people dont know who you are yet call you the leader of al qaeda


The leader of Al Qaeda has never died (Osama), and the leader of Al Qaeda in Iraq has only died once (Zarqawi). Al Qaeda != Al Qaeda in Iraq
 
2007-02-16 12:42:37 PM
Hey, what an amazing coincidence! Everybody heard this guy was hurt and thought, "wow, Bush's surge must be working."

Now it turns out he wasn't hurt at all, but because this is not nearly as interesting news as the first, incorrect story, it won't get as much coverage and many people will go on believing that something is being accomplished.

It's a good thing the first story came from the Iraqi government and not the USA, or I would have to suspect that the Dubya administration was manipulating information to mislead the American public.
 
2007-02-16 12:47:14 PM
B-b-b-but Jessica Lynch!

B-b-b-but Pat Tillman!

/Lyingest junta ever
 
2007-02-16 12:47:32 PM
www.jimnieb.com

"Between the felafel puke in the back alley, and my night job driving taxi in Baghdad, how would I have time to get involved in the fighting?"
 
2007-02-16 12:59:27 PM
You mean the White House's intelligence is faulty? What next, there's no such thing as the Easter bunny?

Oh wait, I know. You use the intelligence that you have unknown knowns about, and not the one you wish you had known unknowns about.
 
2007-02-16 01:16:07 PM
can we still believe that we killed his aide, or are they going to withdraw that claim, too?

his aide was probably some dom deluise type character.
 
2007-02-16 01:20:17 PM
Hold on first he was injured then he wasn't even there? When did Geraldo take control of al-Qa'eda?
 
2007-02-16 01:25:55 PM
This thread fails to deliver.
 
2007-02-16 01:26:21 PM
moosebayou

I got laid off from a job I had worked for almost two years; a week before going back to school. I got my classes set up, then, BAM! Unemployment, baby! Didnt hafta work, but got paid while I was going to school. My buddy was a bartender at a cool joint. Ladies are cheap dates in college. It's chill gettin money from the state!

Step 1: Lose job.
Step 2: Go back to school.
Step 3: Profit!!
 
2007-02-16 01:26:50 PM
Subby sounds like he's happy this guy is okay.
 
2007-02-16 01:30:23 PM
They make most of these announcements so they can track the phone calls when people start going, "Hey Abdul, I heard you were wounded, what's up". Then they know where he is.
 
2007-02-16 01:44:36 PM
img166.imageshack.us
 
2007-02-16 01:52:55 PM
Wow, the replacement number two guy being groomed to replace him must feel pretty secondary right now.
 
2007-02-16 02:19:15 PM
2007-02-16 12:35:46 PM machoprogrammer

okay sorry for trying to be funny...

secondly, regardless of who they are in charge of there is always some top al qaeda official killed seemingly every day, only to be replaced a week later and have that guy that just got the job killed....

sorry i wasnt funny enough for you.
 
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