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(JS Online)   17-year-old smashes his grandfather's luxury sportscar into tree, blames "The Fast and the Furious"   ( divider line
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2938 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Jul 2001 at 12:13 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

61 Comments     (+0 »)

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2001-07-03 12:36:43 AM  
I can see this happening. Especially since it's geared more towards those that like to take a honda and spend an arm and a leg on it to get it to sound like it's going to explode half a mile down the road. I liked Gone in 60 Seconds. The actual story totally sucked, but that '67 Shelby GT 500 'Stang was just NICE. And there were plenty of REALLY nice cars in it, but hondas, except that one that got whooped by the Porsche in the beginning. I know when I got out of seeing that movie I was a bit wound up. But I didn't go wrapping my car around a tree.
2001-07-03 12:56:37 AM  
... a 17-year-old smashed his grandfather's luxury sports car into a tree, blaming the incident on the excitement of what he told police was "a dangerous movie."

Nice try, sunshine.

I have the feeling that this guy also tried out "My dog ate my homework" on all his teachers.
2001-07-03 01:03:38 AM  
Old story...


I just wish they had this stuff on when I was growing up..

Maybe I would have gotten away with all the dumb crap I did and got punished for.
2001-07-03 01:06:08 AM  
when does the movie come out where a bunch of teenagers drink gasoline and then light their burps? further proof of darwin's theory... except that, sadly, none of these dumb farks killed themselves. somebody should tell these kids about psychedelic cat piss.
2001-07-03 01:52:51 AM  
Heh, Wisconsin. This is probally the craziest thing to hit that state in years.
2001-07-03 02:11:55 AM  
Yeah this shiat is happening like everynight at my theatre. Some jackarse does a donut in the parking lot or spins out at the bottom of the mall entrance. Last Friday we had a kid to flip his mustang trying to copy the movie.

Tonight we had some whigette and his chick to spin their tires so much they set out outside smoke alarm off.

D@mn mall rats.
2001-07-03 02:19:40 AM  
I hate people with no shopping agenda.
2001-07-03 02:28:58 AM  
Man, I hate those goddamn hopped up Hondas that sound like farking bees. I HATE them. Yer little 1.8 liter 4 cyl engine? Ooooohhh it must be fast! Idiots. Then they put those huge wings on the back, because, well, the car is so fast it has to have a wing to hold it down. Morons. Then they lower 'em to improve handling, which actually just makes it worse. I'm proud to say my 20 year old BMW still pisses on these guys. Idiots. Morons. I hate those fuckers.
2001-07-03 02:32:09 AM  
Yeah. My kid just shoved spinach down his furby's mouth and broke it. He is trying to blame A.I.
2001-07-03 02:55:01 AM  
Watch it, Aggrop.

Everyone knows that the tinnier your engine, the wider your exhaust, and the more random stickers you have, the better your car.
2001-07-03 03:31:25 AM  
Torquemada It's all farkin crap. Anyone else hate those cars as much as I do? Then check a hilarious site here.

[image from too old to be available]
2001-07-03 03:40:27 AM  
"Police fault hot rod movie"

I want to farking KILL the police for even MISTAKING all those farking RICERS for hot-rods.

THIS is a hot rod:

[image from too old to be available]
2001-07-03 03:40:40 AM  
Well fark, take my word for it.
2001-07-03 03:43:36 AM  
I have a Honda Accord that sounds like a fart on a paint can lid as well. But, thankfully, I didn't do it on purpose. I have a broken exaust pipe, and got it patched...sounds EXACTLY like those retard's cars.

So, they spend hundreds to make their car sound, and actually drive, just the same as mine. I spend 30 bucks to get my broken exaust patchedcoontill I get it totally fixed), and it sounds the same.

The funny part is, they hear me comming, and think I'm one of their "type". Than they see my poopy little car, with a Darwin fish, Zappa sticker, Autobots/Decepticons stickers, local indie music station sticker, etc., and it just confuses the crap out of them.
2001-07-03 03:49:46 AM  
this is the best site for auto abominations I've found Aggrop: one-liners is the shiat you want... design doesn't exactly lead you there... fools and their money
2001-07-03 04:20:25 AM  
You Only Live Once
2001-07-03 04:53:25 AM  
Dude Dude! Thanks. I will thoroughly examine that site. It looks like it kicks ass. I was SO pissed that I didn't have my dig camera with me when I saw a BMW 318i. On the back right, the clown had added a tag that read "M5" which of course refers to the 5 series (not the 318- that's a 3 series) factory boosted, hopped up style. But any real owner knows that a BMW never has both the "M" tag AND the number "318" or whatever. It's ONE or the other. Not both. Farkin' moron. It's like the honda that says "Powered by Acura"--- here's the rub--- Acura doesn't make engines. Bwahahahaha!
2001-07-03 04:54:35 AM  
Hopefully, they will make the movie R to keep out of the theater all those under-seventeen teenagers, and thus make our streets safer.
2001-07-03 04:59:03 AM  
Puyo! Very nice. I know you have a Honda because they're economical, efficient, reliable etc. An economy car. No offense, but it's true. Not really a sports car. Still, seeing a car like yours gives me hope.
But don't get me wrong. I'm not dissing Honda. See, I have one. But it's a CBR 600 Hurricane (that's a motorcycle) and hitting 135MPH is not a problem. 0-60 in about 5 secs- (3.5 if I were a better rider). Yep, I'll put my Honda against any other Honda anytime. Cars anyway. There's plenty of fast ass bikes...
2001-07-03 05:00:04 AM  
Actually, these kids killing themselves sounds like a great idea!
2001-07-03 05:11:46 AM  
I blame Cheech and Chong for when I got busted selling weed!

Wait... I didn't get busted selling weed... I don't even smoke weed! Damn.

Can I still blame cheech and chong?
2001-07-03 05:16:00 AM  
Shouldn't this article be labeled asinine?

I hate it when people blame what they see for their own actions. I mean don't people have any common sense anymore. Wait what am I saying? I live in America, everyone here is hella stupid, which makes it easier for me to screw them over.
2001-07-03 05:38:41 AM  
Aggrop, yea, it's deffinately reliable. 191k miles on it so far, and it still runs fairly well. (btw, it's an '89)
2001-07-03 07:49:13 AM  
We should point out the obvious stupidity when we find it... This remark best fits... Read and then we'll dissect-

"Ritter said she questions whether the PG-13 rating should be upgraded to R, which would keep anyone under 17 out of the movie unless accompanied by an adult."

What would be the point of changing the rating to an "R" if, in most states, the driving age is actually 17? Have there been a rash of 13 year-olds leaving this flick and stealing these types of fart-boxes and racing them?

A side note... Honda's SUCK.
Toyota's SUCK.
Subaru's SUCK.
1967 Mustangs Rock!
1667 Impala SS's Rock!
Any Car built in america with a 300+ motor before 1972 ROCKS
2001-07-03 08:37:57 AM  
I'm messed up in the head. I blame the intolerant portions of the american society.

Now prepare to face my lawsuit, and give me money

2001-07-03 08:58:23 AM  
"It just gets kids worked up."

No, it just gets COMPLETE RETARDS WHO DESERVE TO DIE worked up.
2001-07-03 09:13:46 AM  
Frksamor... AMEN BUDDY!
2001-07-03 09:18:46 AM  

I loved that rice boy page, although I haven't been there in over a year...

Almost wish I still had "Rusty the trusty steed" - 1983 Subaru hunchback... I had a tomato can exhaust patch, duct tape floor (the floor pan was rusted through and snow/slush would get in while I drove it in Anchorage), a radio that worked better when I put my hand next to where the antenna used to be (made it look like I was waving at people as I drove down the road), and a rocking chair drivers seat that I kept from falling through the floor by screwing a piece of oak through the rocker panel.

Last time I saw the car (I gave it to a friend, well, he used to be... Heh) the rear window was gone (I don't even think they had the poly/duct tape fix on it yet), but it was still driving.

The truck I owned before that got stuck at low tide and then sat in a garage for 12 years before I got it... Nuff said..

Check this site out too...

I like the spoiler and coffee can... Sorry, haven't bothered to learn html tags yet...

Oh, one last rant... I've never seen the guy, but "Vin Diesel"? His real name must be something like "Wilbur Butquist" or something... Come on... He prolly wears nothing but "Diesel" clothes too... Oh boy, that really gives me wood.

Bye now - off to buy some soup/autoparts.
2001-07-03 09:30:03 AM  
Haha! This guy is one smart little shithead. The only stupid thing is that the courts will probably take this as a legitimate excuse.
2001-07-03 09:44:47 AM  
Oak Creek police Capt. Warren Endthoff sounds like a decent guy. Find his quote on the article somewhere.
2001-07-03 09:53:13 AM  
Watch movie. Perform an action. Blame the movie.
I'm gonna go watch "A Tale of Two Cities" then guillotine some French and blame it on the movie.
2001-07-03 09:54:15 AM  
I guess that settles it, life does imitate art.
2001-07-03 09:54:47 AM  
Pretty soon nobody will be responsible for anything. It'll be great! For any conceivable circumstance, there will be a socially acceptable excuse.

"I didn't mean to break into the house, officer. 'Entrapment' made me do it!"
"All right then, you can go. Move along, nothing to see here!"
2001-07-03 10:29:06 AM  
Just to clear the air, compact import cars can easily be tuned to rip. I read this mag where a guy took a stock Honda or Nissan or something similar, changed the turbo to a larger one, swaped heads and the thing pumped out 550 horse. Total spent? 2500 bucks in bolt on upgrades. Quarter miles in the low 10's. Now that being said most guys don't do that, they do just lower them and put exhaust tips on them and try to look "sweet" And Frksamore: go drive the 2002 Subaru WRX 5 speed before you say they suck.
Aggrop: A Hurricane? Jesus, that thing must be 6 years old! Get a new bike already. The 929 is bad ass 168 mph and agile to boot. Mine is custom painted.(read, I slid it across the pavement)
2001-07-03 10:39:03 AM  
I think we have a rice boy here, gang.
2001-07-03 10:40:59 AM  
my car is powered my briggs & straton or was it craftsman...not sure but it sounds great.
2001-07-03 11:01:14 AM  
Actualy I drive a Blazer right now, I'm just telling you you don't know dick about cars. I've built a naturlly aspirated(that means no turbos or superchargers for the automotivly challenged among us) air cooled VW motor that puts out more hp than the 4.3 liter vortech in my Blazer. That means it would have to exceed 190 hp for you guys talking out of your asses. Tell me again how imports can't make power.
2001-07-03 11:05:38 AM  
I want a BMW M5.
Best sedan ever.
2001-07-03 11:39:42 AM  

"Oak Creek police Capt. Warren Endthoff said he has witnessed no increase in stunt driving beyond the typical summertime shenanigans."

Scofflaws up to their summertime Shenanigans eh?
2001-07-03 11:51:17 AM  
Well, the Dukes of Hazard caused us to do Jump to Jump stunts on our BMX bikes. We kept pulling them further and further apart until some kid would plow into the front end of the landing ramp. Usually break a wrist/arm, serious gravel rash, etc.

Important thing is we realized at a young age that you can get hurt copying stunts from dukes of hazard. These young little rice rocket guys grew up playing Playstation Gran turismo, crash, start over, no problem.

I saw a 4 cyl mustang the other day with a GT tag on it.
2001-07-03 11:57:18 AM  
A loser, is a loser, is a loser!

Funny thing is most "kids" gte these ars bought by thier Dad or someone else, and dive to it shiat! Then they buy some junker and baby it!

I laugh at the guy I went to high shool with! He drove some fancy looking sports ar and every week something happened to it. It didn't help that hs was an ass! The bestwas when in a two month period - his battery died, and was hit twice and the second time the guy rolled it onto the lawn of the shool yard! His daddy then bought him a new car - and it was a '92 Ford Tarus! hahahahahhahaha!
2001-07-03 12:03:34 PM  
I blame Ferris Bueller's Day Off...
2001-07-03 01:31:44 PM  
BigPeeler said:
"I guess that settles it, life does imitate art."
But I say:
"Little Asian Cars that Fart ain't Art!"
2001-07-03 01:36:56 PM  
Hey, man. I like those wingtips. They're great thumbholds for playing tiddlywinks.

I drive a 1970 Scout 800A with a 392. Those ummm vehicles make great noises when you roll over them.
It's great for appeasing my road rage.
2001-07-03 01:42:55 PM  
Bah... Far as the rice boy/CID hog flaming goes - if you have enough money you can make anything go fast. Some guy made a Volvo do a 10 sec. quarter mile... I'm pretty sure there are hopped up Yugo's out there too...

Whatever floats yer boat... I personally hate the way front wheel drive feels... But I also dislike the feeling/handling of a large block rear-wheel drive car (read: most American muscle cars)...

Having said that, the new WRX is nice (my friend has one), and I imagine the Lancers and Skylines are great cars too. I've also driven an E28 M5 (1988) - awesome - like a large go-cart.

One of my favorites was a picture of a Diablo with a "Turbo" badge taken off of a Porsche... A guy with more money than brains...

Bah... Damn this slippery slope of blame... Perhaps someday in the not to distant future people will realize that the world will be a less litigous if we kill all the lawyers...

Yes, when the streets are awash in the blood of ambulance chasers only then will it be safe for ricey Bo and Luke imitaters to jump their parents cars into sandwich shops or twirl tirelessly in blody-doughnuts with McDonalds Flash-Point (tm) coffee in between their legs - being chased all the while by Rosco P. Coletrane and his dog Flash.

"I blame myself." One of my favorite quotes from a Matt Goering Life in Hell comics.
2001-07-03 02:04:55 PM  
Next comes the excuse of:

"I dunno. 'Felt like it."
2001-07-03 02:16:05 PM  
I know I'm gonna get a lot of flack for this but here goes anyways.

"American Sportscars = oxymoron"

Not that I like Japanese Cars at all. In fact, the only Japanese car that I like is the Toyota Supra Twin Turbo but that's about it...

BMW's are the best!
2001-07-03 02:40:13 PM  
Camaro SS, Corvette, Mustang GT, ..........I disagree with CaptMorgan
2001-07-03 02:56:32 PM  
Porsche, Lamborghini, Ferrari, ..........I disagree with Albert
2001-07-03 03:21:10 PM  
Purple Duck YEah, my hurricane is an '89! That's THE POINT!!! Even a 12 year old bike pisses on all new cars!~! Your bumble exhaust doesn't do shiat losers! Oh yeah, get a BMW!!! The best cars ever made, by far.
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