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(Ananova)   Naked man tries to get eaten by zoo bears   ( divider line
    More: Stupid  
•       •       •

2378 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Jul 2001 at 7:37 AM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

27 Comments     (+0 »)
2001-07-02 08:23:44 AM  
A spokesman for Berlin police said: "He's very lucky. The bears are well fed and were[n]'t hungry."

I'd say he was pretty unlucky if he wanted to be eaten.
2001-07-02 08:29:57 AM  
At least we finally know that Ananova gets its info from The Sun - it explains a lot
2001-07-02 08:51:53 AM  
further proof that bears are smarter than your average human.
2001-07-02 08:59:11 AM  
I wrote a news story like this a couple of years ago. A guy had been tripping his butt off for a couple of days and went to the zoo. He climbed into the bear pit and got mauled pretty bad. When they pulled him out he told the zoo keepers that he thought the bears motioned at him to come and join him.
2001-07-02 09:26:32 AM  
This guy must have eaten one too many squirrels (a favorite of Jerry Springer guests).
2001-07-02 09:49:20 AM  
"Come on Goldilocks, time to go home"

To what hair is he refering to on the naked man?

2001-07-02 10:26:27 AM  
JUST A THOUGHT, maybe you can piss a bear off, let's say, if you go up to it a smack it a couple of times. Maybe strap some meat to your body, cover your self in honey, you know shiat like that.

lazy-ass suicide attempt.
2001-07-02 10:31:22 AM  
OR maybe he was just that fugly !
2001-07-02 11:01:55 AM  
That's harsh. Even the friggin bear disses him! I guess that's why he wanted to kill himself.
2001-07-02 11:12:53 AM  
This guy will never get selected for the German team in the "Getting Eaten by a Crocodile Competition."
2001-07-02 11:51:12 AM  
Nothing's worse than a suicide chump.
2001-07-02 11:53:57 AM  
The version I heard of this story this morning was that he also rubbed tuna fish all over his body to make himself more appetizing. That must be a downer to a depressed person. Can't even get a bear to eat you.
2001-07-02 12:22:13 PM  
Yet one more reason why Germany will never rule the world.
2001-07-02 12:24:09 PM  
Was the man a fan of David Hasselhoffe?
2001-07-02 01:45:27 PM  
if youre going to kill yourself, wouldn't you consider less painful and drawn out alternatives to being mauled and eaten? there's a reason we don't see many blender-suicides.
2001-07-02 02:49:14 PM  
Personally, I think if you are stupid enough to off yourself you should at least do something that would help out the rest of us.
Like running into a skinhead gathering with a couple of swords and call them a bunch of corksukkin pantywaists and then take out as many as you can while you go down swinging.
2001-07-02 03:26:07 PM  
Maybe next time he should try wearing clothes. Maybe the bears were taken aback by his bareness?
2001-07-02 03:30:15 PM  
"Psst. Hey you. Yeah, you. Come on in here. *waves* Come on. The water's great. We're just sunning and swimming. We won't hurt ya. Just hop that fence. Come play with us. That's it..."

PSA: Do not go to the zoo on hallucinogens
2001-07-02 03:33:15 PM  
LOL!!! IM Me...
2001-07-02 03:46:06 PM  
2001-07-02 04:56:33 PM  
Would have been a better story if it were 'Naked man tries to get eaten by Pooh Bears'
2001-07-02 05:29:03 PM  
He should have tried to take a crap in the tiger cage. They don't like that much...
2001-07-02 07:45:01 PM  
Madpiper, I remember that story, that was crazy.

Flux, LOL blender suicides.... nasty.
2001-07-02 08:09:08 PM  
wait? so what happened next? did he just calmly leave the zoo? cuz, it doesnt seem like a suicidal person would just up and leave when the police got know?

2001-07-02 08:27:16 PM  
And who says Germans don't have a sense of humor?
2001-07-02 09:52:36 PM  
The little bear sleeps in his little bear skin
He sleeps very well I am told
Last night I slept in my little bare skin
And I caught a heck of a cold.
2001-07-03 12:05:48 AM  
FOOL! Get between the mother and her cub! FOOL!
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