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(thisislondon)   Rejoice! Jesus has returned. Except this time he's black, he worships the devil and he eats little girls   ( thisislondon.co.uk) divider line
    More: Sick  
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20340 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Feb 2007 at 10:03 AM (10 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



281 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2007-02-09 09:41:15 AM  
Ok. That one I didn't expect. Sure a salt stain makes perfect sense. But this...wow...He works in mysterious cannibalistic Satanic ways.
 
2007-02-09 09:53:01 AM  
Sounds like the start of a bad B-movie.
 
2007-02-09 10:05:04 AM  
So, nothing's changed?
Not news.
 
2007-02-09 10:05:31 AM  
Good ol' Jesus. Nice to see he hasn't changed.
 
2007-02-09 10:05:46 AM  
Blasphemer! Raptor Jesus does not approve.
 
2007-02-09 10:06:16 AM  
i guess he got tired of having people always eating on him
 
2007-02-09 10:06:50 AM  
safeinsane If I were president I would give you a million dollars to never become a history teacher ever.
 
2007-02-09 10:06:55 AM  
Whaaa???

/Jeebus Christ on a Cracker!
 
2007-02-09 10:07:07 AM  
Makes you wonder what the second coming really is, doesn'y it?
 
2007-02-09 10:07:32 AM  
I'm pretty sure I put an exclamation point in there. Who the hell is Rejoice Jesus?
 
2007-02-09 10:07:37 AM  
Steven Tari, started his cult last year after he was expelled from a Bible college for stealing from fellow students.

Isn't that what organized religion is all about?
 
2007-02-09 10:07:40 AM  
I thought he was black the first time around.
 
2007-02-09 10:07:58 AM  
Hope he doesn't get them belly button ring things caught in his throat.

/ Chew each piece 20 times before swallowing.

// I hate my mother in Law
/// Then try the salad
 
2007-02-09 10:08:24 AM  
Five-year olds?

/Don't mess with the Jesus.
 
2007-02-09 10:08:31 AM  
In Soviet England, Jesus eats YOU!
 
2007-02-09 10:08:41 AM  
Ut oh, we got the anti-Christian trifecta in play. First the Gideons, now the "Black Jesus". All we need is Pat Robertson to say something stupid.
 
2007-02-09 10:08:44 AM  
At least he's taking girls.
 
2007-02-09 10:09:04 AM  
img.photobucket.com
 
2007-02-09 10:09:14 AM  
(ok, so they're not soviet...but it sounds better with the cliche) ;)
 
2007-02-09 10:09:25 AM  
He ate her liver with a bottle of kianti and a side of farva beans.
 
2007-02-09 10:10:00 AM  
mormo: I thought he was black the first time around.

Are there black jews?

/Cue the Sammy Davis Jr. pics!
 
2007-02-09 10:10:03 AM  
IXI Jim IXI

I'll never get tired of that!
 
2007-02-09 10:10:08 AM  
I really should have something to say about this, but

nah......

jebus the 3rd world countries are a mess sometimes.
 
2007-02-09 10:10:24 AM  
Neat. This is a Christian sect that I could really get into. I suppose they will be wanting money, though...
 
2007-02-09 10:10:28 AM  
Richard_M_Nixon: So, nothing's changed?
Not news.


beat me too it.
 
2007-02-09 10:10:44 AM  
Its hard to be Jesus when your 31 years old and wanted by the man.
 
2007-02-09 10:11:01 AM  
Farked? 549 clicks...
 
2007-02-09 10:11:26 AM  
A BLACK Jesus? UNHEARD OF!!!!1111
 
2007-02-09 10:11:41 AM  
kianti

Its Chianti, you gourmand you.
: )
 
2007-02-09 10:11:52 AM  
2007-02-09 10:07:32 AM Suckmykiss

I'm pretty sure I put an exclamation point in there. Who the hell is Rejoice Jesus?

All exclamation points are stripped out of headlines. I don't know why either.
 
2007-02-09 10:11:58 AM  
oasics: jebus the 3rd world countries are a mess sometimes.

Doh...I read the article quick, and thought it happened in London...
 
2007-02-09 10:12:20 AM  
Scoffs at the false Jesus...
img260.imageshack.us

/thanx for the inspiration droptone
 
2007-02-09 10:12:28 AM  
Nobody farks with the black Jesus.
 
2007-02-09 10:12:30 AM  
Gonna have to call in a favor to Orangutang Special Forces to deal with this psycho.
 
2007-02-09 10:12:53 AM  
JESUS SAVES - leftovers
 
2007-02-09 10:12:55 AM  
IXI Jim IXI - actually first time round so did I.

but if that was the case he would have had a cup of tea first.
 
2007-02-09 10:13:28 AM  
i thought jesus was supposed to be gay?
 
2007-02-09 10:13:48 AM  
 
2007-02-09 10:13:51 AM  
It's also "fava" beans.

Nice topical reference, though. This being 1991 and all.
 
2007-02-09 10:14:11 AM  
Bwhahahahaha! Sounds like your primitave Chirstian superstition came back and bit you in the ass. No, black Jesus it's not eat of your followers bodies, drink of their blood and you will live forever. It is they get to eat of your body and drink of your blood to live forever. Ya gots that whole cannibalism thing turned around.


Ut oh, we got the anti-Christian trifecta in play. First the Gideons, now the "Black Jesus". All we need is Pat Robertson to say something stupid.

Is Pat talking? Then whatever he is saying is stupid.
 
2007-02-09 10:15:13 AM  
I like to eat girls, does that make me a "cult leader"?
 
2007-02-09 10:15:35 AM  
Wooden Jesus must be pissed as all get out right now.
 
2007-02-09 10:15:43 AM  
ChairmanKaga: JESUS SAVES - leftovers

Heheheheheh

Jesus Saves--and you can save, too, by clipping these money-saving coupons!

/Jesus saves, and takes half damage.

Galen_Rasputin: primitave

You know, if you spelled that word correctly, the troll would be far more effective.
 
2007-02-09 10:16:19 AM  
Steven Rules He ate her liver with a bottle of kianti and a side of farva beans

Sometimes it's really easy to tell when someone skipped the book and watched the movie instead.
 
2007-02-09 10:16:57 AM  
www.yardwear.net

Not impressed with the children eating thing....
 
2007-02-09 10:17:07 AM  
muninsfire: Jesus Saves--and you can save, too, by clipping these money-saving coupons!

/Jesus saves, and takes half damage.


Jesus saves. Gretzky rebounds...GOOOOOOOOAAAAAAALLLLLL!
 
2007-02-09 10:17:11 AM  
wydok

All exclamation points are stripped out of headlines. I don't know why either.

LET'S SEE THEM STRIP THIS!!!!!1!11!ONE
 
2007-02-09 10:17:21 AM  
#000000 Jesus put a hex on my mom!
 
2007-02-09 10:17:38 AM  
Wow, a black Jesus....just imagine, and there was me with this image of white trash dude hanging off a cross whining.....
 
2007-02-09 10:18:20 AM  
Galen_Rasputin

Typing loudly in the jungles of Papua New Guinea is a great way to give away your position.
 
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