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(   Not News: Someone sends Bill Clinton a package. News: Post office evacuated, bomb squad brought to investigate. Fark: The package? A box of cookies   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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1785 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Jan 2007 at 2:53 AM (11 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

39 Comments     (+0 »)
2007-01-13 01:15:14 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2007-01-13 02:28:02 AM  
Considering Clinton's weight, his heart, and his unstoppable lust for sweets, might as well have sent a ticking bomb.
2007-01-13 02:56:34 AM  
GIS result for cookie bomb: [image from too old to be available]
2007-01-13 02:58:08 AM  
Best. President. Evar.
2007-01-13 02:59:04 AM  
Does this mean we'll be bombing the Keebler Elves?
2007-01-13 02:59:45 AM  
Clinton Rules.
2007-01-13 03:01:37 AM  
xanax should be pumped into the water supply..maybe americans will be less paranoid that way
2007-01-13 03:04:18 AM  
And they were farkING delicious!
2007-01-13 03:05:58 AM  
Bill Clinton is FARK's president. (Yes, that's a compliment.)
George W. Bush is FARK's president. (Yes, that's an insult.)
2007-01-13 03:07:19 AM  
Life is like a box of explosive chocolates
2007-01-13 03:07:31 AM  
imcguyver: Xanax should be pumped into the water supply..maybe americans will be less paranoid that way

Great. Now we have to be paranoided about water supplies.

/paranoided is cromulant
2007-01-13 03:10:29 AM  
AntiNorm If that's original work..

/tip O' the hat
2007-01-13 03:13:38 AM  
If that's original work..

nah, that's been floating around fark for a year or so now
2007-01-13 03:17:53 AM  
2007-01-13 03:24:14 AM  
Cookies? Sorry, but if it's not a briefcase full of poo it's not Fark.
2007-01-13 03:32:37 AM  
imcguyver: xanax should be pumped into the water supply..maybe americans will be less paranoid that way

YAY! I am intrigued by your ideas and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
2007-01-13 03:38:26 AM  
Based upon their reaction, by my calculations we need to send another 15 packages of cookies, then we can send the real bomb.

Or we could just mess with their heads and just send the bomb in package #3. Then send another 13 more packages of cookies, just to really fark their minds.
2007-01-13 03:56:47 AM  
It could have been sprinkler parts.
2007-01-13 04:16:11 AM  
No way! Nobody hates ol' Bill Clinton so much that they'd send him something that would harm him, do they? Why would anyone suspect such a thing?

2007-01-13 04:17:10 AM  
yotta: It could have been sprinkler parts.

I thought the headline was going to end: "fark: the package? it was a vibrating dildo."

we all know Bill is freaky. we all remember where he stuck those cigars before he smoked them, no?

hint: it rymes with "a Bagina"
2007-01-13 04:44:01 AM  
How about THESE cookies, sugar?
[image from too old to be available]

Don't mind if ah do...
[image from too old to be available]
2007-01-13 04:52:51 AM  
Clinton is his own grandfather?!?!
2007-01-13 04:53:18 AM  
Why does the post office and media toss it's collective cookies every time a box gets sent to a president?

Bill Clinton for Dictator of Iraq!
2007-01-13 07:15:56 AM  
How about sending a package of rolled-up cylinders of cookie dough and an alarm clock?

/The clock is for timing the baking, you see
2007-01-13 07:39:18 AM  
imcguyver: Xanax should be pumped into the water supply..maybe americans will be less paranoid that way

Just like flourine? That is why I only drink distilled water, or rainwater, and only pure-grain alcohol.
2007-01-13 08:52:36 AM  
My cousin once tried to mail Clinton a light-bulb bomb and is now in Supermax in Florence, CO until 2021.
2007-01-13 09:01:07 AM  
Considering the fact that somebody recently sent every justice on the Supreme Court poisoned cookies, I'm not at all surprised by this (especially when you have any number of "commentators" suggesting such actions).
2007-01-13 09:28:28 AM  
Of course a box of off-smelling cigars would have gone right through.
2007-01-13 09:57:59 AM  
Were they Lady Fingers? ROFLMAO

/Do they still make those Cigar Bubble Gum?
//That would have been hilarious.
2007-01-13 11:58:17 AM  
Now, if some guy tried sending Bush a bunch of pretzels, the Secret Service would probably be all over them before they got to the White House lawn. Hey, wait! Why are these suited men knocking at my front door?

2007-01-13 12:39:51 PM  
Everyone wants a day off of work. Just say a package looks suspicious and get that ball rolling!
2007-01-13 01:05:52 PM  
Bill was glad it wasn't his replacement Fleshlight.
2007-01-13 01:13:41 PM  
The 3-foot by 3-foot box had an express mail packing label but didn't have the correct address of the Clintons' Chappaqua home.

Jesus, where can I buy a box of cookies like that?!?
2007-01-13 01:15:53 PM  

/got nothin'
2007-01-13 02:48:49 PM  

thank god, I thought I was the only person who noticed that the box size seemed a little massive.
I would be suspicious if someone I didn't know sent me a box that big
2007-01-13 04:09:37 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

"Say, you gonna eat those fries?"
2007-01-13 05:36:09 PM  
The Bush legacy grows.
2007-01-13 10:41:48 PM  
The package? Cookies. The cookies? LACED WITH PEANUTS. <Dun dun DUN>
2007-01-13 11:10:35 PM  
them cookies was TEH bomb!
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