Santa's a robot, the Space-Pope is a reptile. Get it right.

It's not Christmas if there's not a few Catholic-baiting threads on Fark, now is it?

I'm not sure if I still qualify as Catholic, but the alcohol in me says:

Merry Christmas. The world's full of a-holes, but today, try to surround yourself with the people you love most in the world, and tell them all how much you love them, either with gifts or words, or preferably both. If you can help out someone less fortunate than you, you should. It's cold out.

Merry Christmas,

bkennedy

I have nothing more to say than a copypasta:

It's not Christmas if there's not a few Catholic-baiting threads on Fark, now is it?

+2, subby!

Great headline, subby.

*golf clap*

Miserable headline.

At least Robopope wasn't snorting coke with male prostitutes.

Happy Xmas.

According the photo in the article, RoboPope is in dire need of lubrication.

Mr Blackitt: Look at them, bloody Catholics, filling the bloody world up with bloody people they can't afford to bloody feed.
Mrs Blackitt: What are we dear?
Mr Blackitt: Protestant, and fiercely proud of it.
Mrs Blackitt: Hmm. Well, why do they have so many children?
Mr Blackitt: Beacuse... every time they have sexual intercourse, they have to have a baby!
Mrs Blackitt: But it's the same with us, Harry.
Mr Blackitt: What do you mean?
Mrs Blackitt: Well, we've got two children, and we've had sexual intercourse twice.
Mr Blackitt: That's not the point. We could have it any time we wanted!
Mrs Blackitt: Really?
Mr Blackitt: Oh yes, and what's more, because we don't believe in that Papist claptrap, we can take precautions.
Mrs Blackitt: What do you mean... lock the door?
Mr Blackitt: No, no. I mean, because we're members of the Protestant Reformed Church, which successfully challenged the autrocratic power of the Papacy in the mid-sixteenth century, we can wear little rubber devices to prevent issue.
Mrs Blackitt: What d'you mean?
Mr Blackitt: I mean, if I wanted, have sexual intercourse with you,...
Mrs Blackitt: Oh, yes, Harry.
Mr Blackitt: ...and, by wearing a rubber sheath over my old feller, I could insure... that, when I came off, you would not be impregnated.
Mrs Blackitt: Ooh!
Mr Blackitt: That's what being a Protestant's all about! That's why it's the church for me! That's why it's the church for anyone who respects the individual, and the individual's right to decide for him- or herself. When Martin Luther nailed his protest up to the church door in 1517, he may not have realised the full significance of what he was doing, but... 400 years later, thanks to him, my dear, I can wear whatever I want on my John Thomas.
[He sniffs.]
Mr Blackitt: And, Protestantism doesn't stop at the simple condom! Oh, no! I can wear French Ticklers if I want.
Mrs Blackitt: You what?
Mr Blackitt: French Ticklers! Black Mambos! Crocodile Ribs! Sheaths that are designed not only to protect, but also to enhance the stimulation of sexual congress.
Mrs Blackitt: Have you got one?
Mr Blackitt: Have I got one? Uh, well, no, but I can go down the road any time I want, and walk into Harry's and hold my head up high and say in a loud, steady voice, "Harry, I want you to sell me a condom. In fact, today, I think I'll have a French Tickler, for I am a Protestant."


\Sorry, only thing I can think of this Christmas
\\Merry Christmas everyone!!

/another pope thread?
//another pope pic!

RoboPope-Bum-Fingering-KidBuggering Trifecta

In Play!

Merry Christmas Farkers.

/Weeeee!

totalsecurity: RoboPope-Bum-Fingering-KidBuggering

...millennium hand and shrimp!

Bene, pass it. Don't be a bong hog.

hehh

Such a very clever headline. This Christmas morn, it's nice to be reminded that making bigoted jokes about Catholics is acceptable in mainstream society, whereas making bigoted jokes about Muslims, Jews, or virtually any other non-Christian religion is enough to end a person's career and have them blackballed from the social landscape.

Oh, wait, I know! How about if people stop making bigoted jokes about ALL religions?

Or else everyone learn that if you can dish it out, you'd better get ready to take it.

Either way is fine, but until either way is settled upon, all y'alls is big-time hypocrites.

bahr humbug. I say dish it out to all religions, they're all happy enough to dish it out to us 'non-believers', and they're all as farked up as each other.

/ oh, and Merry Christmas everybody

I think bahr is referring to how the mainstream media has ignored the Jewish and Muslim pedophile scandals, while focusing on the Catholic scandal.

I agree with BAHR.

If you can dish it out, you should be prepared to take some shiat too. Quid pro quo, kiddies.

It's late - 'hafta go to bed so we can get on with the Santa portion of our holiday observance.

And if anyone feels inclined to resent Christmas, well thats fine...it's a Monday so I suggest getting dressed in the a.m. and going to work - 'wouldn't want to offend you with a paid holiday, especially all of you folks that work for da gubamint.

Merry Christmas! :-)

Don't forget all the molesters and gropers out there in Washington D.C., plus their state government-bound ilk, roaming the hallways of higher gubamints everywhere.

I followed this link expecting to see some robopopes. Where the f are my robopopes.

Shame on submitter. On Christmas day of all days.

Funny headline, but nasty.
Give the Goyim a break today. It's their big holiday. Have some respect.

subby, I'll pray for your dumb ass at mass this morning, too.

Keep in mind why Jesus was born in a barn. (What do you think a stable is?)

Joseph was ordered by the government to take his family from their home, 70 miles to another city so they could fill out the equivallent of a 1040! You had to go to your home city to register to pay taxes. So many people were traveling, there was no hotel rooms left. So a young couple who were expecting a child had to sleep in a barn.

Raising taxes does so much good for everyone, doesnt it!

Merry Christmas!

Doing a quick count of the few posts today, which of the following is true?

1) Atheists are the overzealous ones out on their self-righteous crusade against religion.

2) Atheists are the hypocritical ones with incessant tirades against others' beliefs, while projecting their aggression onto Christians to soothe their hollow husk of morality.

3) Atheists are the most condemning, pseudo-elitist group of bastards in the modern world.

4) All of the ... well, you know already.

Hey, before you get into a hissy fit, do the count yourself. The evidence is on my side.

I never expected that when I got the TF subscription that I'd have to put up with the most rabid bunch of anti-Catholic asshat idiots this side of hillbilly-ville.

Many of you bastards are just intolerant, stereotyping jerkoffs. I've never met a priest who was a molester. Pope Benedict looks weak because John Paul II was larger than life, but Benedict's the best of our best.

And, none of you raving prejudiced whistledicks will understand a word that I just said.

YoggiSothoth

Hey, before you get into a hissy fit, do the count yourself. The evidence is on my side.

You fail at science. Your sample is too small, biased (you are gathering it off of a thread obviously designed to be a flame war) and you aren't even sure who is a true atheist and who is trolling. Your evidence with which you paint all atheists is what we call 'anecdotal evidence'.

But then again, you have a chip on your shoulder ('everyone is elitist pseudo intellectuals!') and you want to support a pre concieved notion ('teh smug atheists are teh jerks!') so you will take whatever evidence you think you have that will support it without considering the validity of it. That is some good scientific thinking there cletus.

Merry Christmas.

I wonder how many Catholic bashers in this thread kiss Muslim ass so as to not offend them. You a-holes will bash Catholics with impunity, but will bow down to Muslims and say we should be tolerant of their faith.

Hypocrites.

84Charlie

I wonder how many Catholic bashers in this thread kiss Muslim ass so as to not offend them. You a-holes will bash Catholics with impunity, but will bow down to Muslims and say we should be tolerant of their faith.

Hypocrites.

Holy crap, catholicism really does cause brain damage - all that duality in thought you guys need to do to maintain your good standing in the heirarchy that is the catholic church.

I don't like any organized religion....as if God would act through those conduits. Please - God doesn't need some guy in a big hat or a big turban 'interpretting' his messages. Organized religion is full of contradictions and outright lies and omissions - that is why the number one rule to any religion is 'do not question -it makes God very very angry - now lets repeat these songs and verses for the next 45 minutes until you go into a low level trance'

You wanna have religion go on...it is a lie - and that is provable.

Atheism: A religion devoted to its own smug sense of superiority

84Charlie: Atheism: A religion devoted to its own smug sense of superiority

You going to just keep directing snide comments into the ether, or actually address someone today, chief?

daimonasfonias-
Just like you, I do what I want.

Does the Pope shiat in the woods? Is a bear Catholic?

/nothin'
//Happy Festivus!!!

84Charlie

Atheism: A religion devoted to its own smug sense of superiority

You wrap yourself up in whatever makes you feel better. You can only make yourself feel inferior. Maybe you should reflect on why you believe what you do and then you wouldn't feel so put upon by others positions or beliefs - after all, many athiests were not born into atheist households...they often came to that conclusion through introspection.

Why do you believe what you do? Because your parents were? Did you come to religion or was it put on you like a hat?

84Charlie: Just like you, I do what I want.

All right, for reminding me of a favorite South Park episode, you get some points. Happy Holidays!

It's Christmas, and we Catholic folk should be filled with love for all of our brethren, even the ones who make tired, hackneyed jokes at out expense.

Merry Christmas all!

The point that 84Charlie is making isn't that Catholicism is superior, or even Christianity - it's that it's become cool/trendy to bash on Christianity (and especially Catholicism) while preaching tolerance for Islam, Judaism, Ramadan, Satan worship, Wicca, Paganism, etc., etc. - and then getting all in a snit when a Christian has the *audacity* to speak up and address the hypocrisy. Jesus taught tolerance and love for everyone -- not just Christians. Some people and churches have kinda strayed from that. Today, remember that you're supposed to 'love thy neighbor as you love yourself'.

Good Lord Almighty, you folks are worse than the "Evil Christians" that you're spewing your vitriol against.

Merry Christmas. Even if you're not Christian, enjoy today with your family, friends, and loved ones, and realize that Jesus's teachings were UNIVERSAL - at their core, "Don't be a jerk, help people out."

RoboPope: "You are in violation of John 3:16!"

ShutUpMonkey
I'm witcha on the 'love one another' of Jesus. He also told us to turn the other cheek when insulted for His sake. I'm runnin' outa cheeks, and I'm gettin' pissed. Unfortunately, Catholics don't have a recent tradition of killing people, setting off bombs or burning crosses when we get angry. Pity. Maybe we'd be less of a target of the asshats if we yelled and screamed 24/7 like some Muslims and various agnostics/atheists do for their accomodations.

Look its not that atheists hate other religions - its that we fear the intolerance might lead to someone deciding to kill or hurt us for not following the "true" faith. Since everyone thinks theirs is the true one, they all hate us because we reject them all.

No one is more reviled than an atheist for standing up for their beliefs. We got no allies except for other realists - only enemies on all sides.

But Jesus was born in a cave, not a manger! Subby!

/His cave DID have animals, though...
//Another theological mistranslation... :D

ttc2301

Makes you wonder, doesn't it? :P

waste301

The problem is with many atheists (not saying you're like this), is that at EVERY opportunity, some will scream about how there is no God, and I'm a fool for believing in a fairy tale, and then use scorn and derision while speaking to me. Instead of wanting a rational discourse like they claim I don't use, they're the ones that seem to get all upset.

A true Christian won't kill or hurt you for not following their faith. They'll pray for you. A true Christian won't hate you for not believing - we'll ask God and Jesus to gently try and say "Hey, man, maybe there's something more to this whole existence thing, hey?"

Just saying. :) Not trying to push a belief, but - not all Christians are like that. Fundie zealots, yeah. :) Thankfully, around where I live, they're pretty few and far between, and a lot of other Christians think they're zapped in the melon, too.

Merry Christmas - interpret for glad tidings to you and yours as you wish. :D

ttc2301

I'm witcha on the 'love one another' of Jesus. He also told us to turn the other cheek when insulted for His sake. I'm runnin' outa cheeks, and I'm gettin' pissed

Why are you so defensive though? Who insults you? Do you sometimes get challenged on your beliefs and find your answers wanting and then percieve it as an attack? What has been said to you that is pissing you off? Maybe if you were very confident in your beliefs you wouldn't feel threatened. How did you come to believe what you do? Was it a personal journey of enlightment and revelation or did your parents tell you that you were (whatever religion you are) and you never strayed from that?

Are these the kind of insults you are talking about? Because I m not insulting you - just asking about your beliefs and how they came about.

FYI - I am a firm believer in a God - not sure what it might be or if it is even conscious of our existence - but I am sure there is something we would easily percieve as a God - that is if the simple act of percieving God in all its awsomeness didn't drive one instantly mad.

Religion on the other hand takes this awesome concept of God and turns it into silly stories and figures and images we can easily comprehend. I find that to be pathetic - thinking and talking about God can enlighten us. Chanting repetively and never questioning makes us dumber.

When exactly is a small boys ass ripe?
Catholic minds want to know.
/jiggles the hook

Oh Attribution Theory.
Plenty of decent Catholic priests and wonderful Catholic people, but the Child Molesters and Radicals get all the attention. Same with Protestants. Same with Muslims.

/FARK is an equal opportunity offender
// Many Farkers probably know more nice people of said religions than loons
/// Nice people do not make for good jokes.

importedbeer: Oh Attribution Theory.
Plenty of decent Catholic priests and wonderful Catholic people, but the Child Molesters and Radicals get all the attention. Same with Protestants. Same with Muslims.

/FARK is an equal opportunity offender
// Many Farkers probably know more nice people of said religions than loons
/// Nice people do not make for good jokes.

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