Diogenes: But if you don't believe in the validity of their creed, why do you really care? Let them keep deceiving themselves, while the rest of the non-Mormon world regards the practice as silly.

We wouldn't care if their missionaries would stop annoying us

Hard to get passed the problem that your religion includes the hideously offensive belief that anyone you don't baptize into your faith is hellbound.

You cannot baptise someone posthumously.

I think we should circumcise all the Mormons...not posthumously. That'l learn em.

Wait, what the hell good is a posthumous baptism?

Pxtl: Hard to get passed the problem that your religion includes the hideously offensive belief that anyone you don't baptize into your faith is hellbound.

Almost all religions with a Judeo Christian influence (I'm speaking the more recent ones, especially cults,) are like that.

Hitler was baptised post humously through his family lines. Leave it to the Mormons to let him into heaven.

I'm confused... I thought Mormons were Nazis??

That's okay, I'm posthumously un-baptising Mormons and making them Pastafarians.

Whats the difference between a living mormon and a dead Muslim?


Six wives

Does anyone else think that the chick in the Reuters add in TFA has a perfect gap?

More importantly, what's the tune?

I'd still hit that guy from the christian underground poster. do you think he's teh ghey?

I heard they traced Weisenthal back to Abraham.

Amazing!

Awesome. They have come up with a non-solution to a problem that doesn't exist.

lurch_E_bean
Wait, what the hell good is a posthumous baptism?

I'd ask the same of any baptism. Be that as it may, Wikipedia covers the subject: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baptism_for_the_dead

Essentially, it's a way of extending grace to those who are no longer alive. From my perspective, as a relatively disinterested party, I'd say that it's a more merciful doctrine than the notion that if you don't happen to accept Jesus within the span of your lifetime, you're doomed to eternal suffering, period.

Still seems silly to me (as does most Christian doctrine).

Good job, smitty. I'll be humming that in my head all day...

pxtl
Hard to get passed the problem that your religion includes the hideously offensive belief that anyone you don't baptize into your faith is hellbound.

Mormons don't believe in "hell". Joseph Smith taught that all who die will go to a better place than this earth.

studebaker hoch: You cannot baptise someone posthumously.

lurch_E_bean: Wait, what the hell good is a posthumous baptism?

Ok - so here's how it works as I understand it (not a mormon, but live in The Land Behind the Zion Curtain).

Basically, if you're not a mormon, you go to hell. But not everyone has had the chance to get the mormon message - so members of The Church(tm) can get a "proxy baptism" for someone who has died. That way, while they are in the great waiting room in the sky, waiting for judgement day to come, they can have one last chance to "see the light" (yes, they have missionaries there too, apparently).

You know, I always thought Mormons were completely bat shiat crazy, annoying people, but I have to admit I never even knew any Mormons until just this year. I have two classmates and a professor in graduate school who are Mormon, and they are three of the nicest people I've ever known. Not one of them has ever even mentioned their religion. They don't act judgmental in any way. I suppose they could still be completely bat shiat crazy, but at least they don't go around pushing it on everyone else.

Hey, Diogenes, I bet he'd also be a bit shocked at just how many "straight" Mormons are gay.
/let's face it, in the old days with the rich old guys getting all the wimmenfolk them young guys ridin' the back forty had to do something to pass the time...

ga362: I heard they traced Weisenthal back to Abraham.

Can't petty much any Jew/Hebrew do that? I mean, really, how many people can say with some certainty that they are from a known, traceable bloodline, other than the Roayls, and 1/3 of all nationalist from Ireland?

Mixolydian Master: Whats the difference between a living mormon and a dead Muslim?

Six wives

I hate to admit it...but that one's kinda funny.

I'd rather they not 'baptise' me either.

/In return I shall make them all Discordian Popes, although I might ex-communicate them if they piss me off.

thespindrifter: Almost all religions with a Judeo Christian influence (I'm speaking the more recent ones, especially cults,) are like that.

Except, ironically, Judaism.

lawdude
sharp knees

Dil Doe: You know, I always thought Mormons were completely bat shiat crazy, annoying people, but I have to admit I never even knew any Mormons until just this year. I have two classmates and a professor in graduate school who are Mormon, and they are three of the nicest people I've ever known. Not one of them has ever even mentioned their religion. They don't act judgmental in any way. I suppose they could still be completely bat shiat crazy, but at least they don't go around pushing it on everyone else.

You're lucky - try living in Utah....

GiantRobot: In return I shall make them all Discordian Popes, although I might ex-communicate them if they piss me off.

Or if they eat hot dog buns.

Baptism at birth (or posthumously) is stupid.

Until you are old enough to make your own covenant with whatever invisible sky fairy you talk to, all other symbolism is bunk.

thespindrifter: Can't petty much any Jew/Hebrew do that?

Isn't the jury out on whether even Moses, much less Abraham, were real historical figures?

Pxtl: Hard to get passed the problem that your religion includes the hideously offensive belief that anyone you don't baptize into your faith is hellbound.

That's not a bug, it's a feature: a religion wouldn't be worth much if you didn't believe it was the right religion -- I'd be more worried about the people who try to convert me to their religion and then say "just in case."

studebaker hoch

You cannot baptise someone posthumously.

Mormom doctrine says you can. (but I agree with you)

Consider this,

You just started a new religion. How do you make sure it spreads and prospers?

1) allow poligamy (increase your pop at alarming rates)
2) baptise dead people. Count the dead as new converts. You can now claim you are the "fastest growing religion in the world!
3)Profit.

dum dum dum dum dum dum

Only Mormons go to Heaven (pops)

If anyone tries to pull crap like this, I'll haunt them and their ancestors for eternity! What sort of self-righteous, pious self-aggrandizing horsesh*t is this anyways?
"Well, we're sure he would have done it if he were alive, so we'll do him this favor by doing it after he dies. Hey, I don't hear him complaining about it, do you?'

/DIAF you pricks!
//Sorry, but this just grinds my gears!

studebaker hoch: "You cannot baptise someone posthumously"

or agaunst their will. Of all the audacity ...

God... I love South Park

Hard to get passed the problem that your religion includes the hideously offensive belief that anyone you don't baptize into your faith is hellbound.

You mean like every Christian sect except for Mormonism?

Mormonism is by far the most universalist Christian sect. The only people who go to hell are backsliders (and they have a pretty strict definition of that term) and people like Adolf Hitler. Everyone else goes to some form of heaven. Mormons go to the great heaven with Jesus, good people go to a pretty nice heaven, and bad people go to an alright heaven that still surpasses what we've got on Earth by a mile.

Rob

This must be the easiest religion to get more members. Just walk into a graveyard spray some water around and BAM you have thousands of followers.

Hey Dil Doe..

If you want to be judged by a Mormon you'll have to move to Utah.

Mormon baptism for the dead is basically based on one quote in the New Testament that Joe Smith "interpreted":

1 Corinthians 15:29: "Else what shall they do which are baptized for the dead, if the dead rise not at all? Why are they then baptized for the dead?"

It's just a passing comment by Paul about some other group baptising for the dead... and how seemingly dum dum dum they are for doing it.

/oh the ironicalness of it
//saying "irony" causes thread-jack

Lay off the Mormons. Sure, they're weird, but they aren't agressive, don't do terrorism, don't threaten others for dissing them, etc.

elchip: Isn't the jury out on whether even Moses, much less Abraham, were real historical figures?

I'm from the camp that most stories, legends, and even a few so-called tall tales have origins in historical fact, however distorted they have become over the centuries. They found the burial ground where John Henry likely was interred. King Arthur was likely a regional Chieftain. "Robin Hood" was possibly a merc. Most historical places mentioned in the Scrolls are locateable. I for one can believe that an entire race can be traced back to one man, if 1/3 of all living Irish can be DNA traced back to a 5th century Connagcht King, and my own family name goes back 700 years.

Pxtl

Hard to get passed the problem that your religion includes the hideously offensive belief that anyone you don't baptize into your faith is hellbound.

If you don't believe in religion or hell, why would you even care? Are you looking for reasons to be offended?

On any given day, any person on Earth is hellbound based on any number of religions, some of them no longer actively practiced. Again, if you don't subscribe to that newlsetter, why would you care?

If he's already in heaven, will this get him kicked out?

/is a direct descendant of Adam and Eve