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(Fox News)   When you travel home this Thanksgiving, airports will be issuing you a 1-quart clear ziploc bag into which you may place toiletries contained in 3-ounce or smaller bottles, citizen   ( foxnews.com) divider line
    More: PSA  
•       •       •

5326 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Nov 2006 at 8:54 AM (10 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



198 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2006-11-19 08:59:28 AM  
This is true. I used it to store my feces sandwich.

I hate flying.
 
2006-11-19 09:00:13 AM  
This isn't new, I was given the same kind of bag when I flew out of San Francisco over a month ago (they wouldn't let me use the larger ziploc bag that I had put my stuff in at home). It's still ridiculous, but whatever. The worst part for me was having "self-medicated," then being in the line where they make you stand in the machine that blows air all over you looking for trace amounts of whatever, then watching them open all my carry on stuff and wipe my laptop down for explosives, etc. THAT'S when the paranoia kicked in for me.
 
2006-11-19 09:01:50 AM  
Do these farking nimrods actually think this is helping in any way? 9/11 happened because of BOX CUTTERS. No one had the liquid binary explosive from Die Hard 3. They had box cutters. And they could do it again. So relax.
 
2006-11-19 09:01:57 AM  
boooooo boooooooooooo boooooooooooo
 
2006-11-19 09:02:59 AM  
Just as long as there is no breast milk.

/never understood the reason why mothers had to drink their milk?
//I heard milk can cause explosive diarrhea but that is it
 
2006-11-19 09:03:56 AM  
Just remember, it has to be a 3 oz container or less, not a larger container with just less than 3 oz of liquid in it. I saw some lady dragged out of the line and beaten for this two weeks ago.
 
2006-11-19 09:04:23 AM  
Oh, and I want a transporter dammit. That would solve all this security shiat (probably wouldn't actually, it would be just as big a pain with screening, but at least it would be cooler).
 
2006-11-19 09:04:37 AM  
I thought this liquid explosive thing had been debunked?
 
2006-11-19 09:04:51 AM  
Remember those two guys that were plotting to blow up planes en route to the US using liquid explosives? Remember when they couldn't even be taken to trial due to lack of evidence?
Remember when Newark failed 20 of 22 security tests?

Praise Science! We are safe!
 
2006-11-19 09:05:10 AM  
Do these farking nimrods actually think this is helping in any way? 9/11 happened because of BOX CUTTERS. No one had the liquid binary explosive from Die Hard 3. They had box cutters. And they could do it again. So relax.

I'm surprised no one's used ceramic knives yet. Seems like it'd be easy to get those past security - it's almost as if the parties responsible for 9/11 have accomplished what they needed to accomplish and aren't even trying anymore.

But you should still be afraid! Because it... helps... somehow. Trust us.
 
2006-11-19 09:05:23 AM  
Anyone wanna translate the following?

1-quart
ziploc

I've worked out Thanksgiving and ounce ;P
 
2006-11-19 09:05:24 AM  
It's actually 3.4 oz, or smaller, to keep with European standards.
 
2006-11-19 09:06:50 AM  
At last. I finally feel safe for the first time in six years. That's the gosh darn truth.
 
2006-11-19 09:07:33 AM  
we're winning? right?
 
2006-11-19 09:08:00 AM  
Thats why jesus traveled by boat.
 
2006-11-19 09:09:00 AM  
weave: I saw some lady dragged out of the line and beaten for this two weeks ago.

Ha ha. It's funny because it's almost true.

I wouldn't be surprised if airport security started using tasers on non-compliant passengers
 
2006-11-19 09:09:30 AM  
One last drunken sunday afternoon post; I fly a lot, and it amazes me that even with all the announcements about not bringing food or liquids or anything like that in carry-on luggage, how many idiots just didn't pay attention and end up having to throw away expensive perfumes or whatever. I saw a woman in Las Vegas pitch a fit because she couldn't bring her yogurt on the plane. Lady, it costs $.60, buy a new one. But it gave me an idea; make a new airline for idiots or just people who don't care. It would be cheap as hell to fly on, but the security would be much more lax, sort of a flying Russian Roulette. (I figure, if you aren't astute enough to notice the MYRIAD warnings about bringing stuff onto the plane, then maybe you just aren't worth saving, OR, you fly for $20 instead of $600)

/my $.02
 
2006-11-19 09:10:21 AM  
it's almost as if the parties responsible for 9/11 have accomplished what they needed to accomplish and aren't even trying anymore.

That's exactly what it is. In their wildest dreams Bin Laden and his crew couldn't imagine 9/11 working better than it did. Bush and the American people did everything they were supposed to do after 9/11. To hold another attack would be redundant.
 
2006-11-19 09:10:53 AM  
paranand: It would be cheap as hell to fly on, but the security would be much more lax, sort of a flying Russian Roulette.

I like it. For others, there could be an airline where everyone rides naked and chained to their seat. Let the free market decide.
 
2006-11-19 09:11:07 AM  
fear crest toothpaste
 
2006-11-19 09:11:11 AM  
1 qt size see thru ziploc baggy.

1 allowed per passenger.

3.4 oz or smaller size liquid, gel or creams that can fit into said baggy and allow it to be closed w/o bulging of seams.

/word
 
2006-11-19 09:11:17 AM  
It would be cheap as hell to fly on, but the security would be much more lax...

fakr, I'd fly it. Not like the expensive version is any more secure anyway.
 
2006-11-19 09:11:36 AM  
Are mp3 players still now allowed, but Sony laptop batteries are? I'm still confused on that one.

/not flying again until I can listen to music
//I really, really, REALLY hate flying if I can't tune everything out
 
2006-11-19 09:11:41 AM  
img101.imageshack.us
 
2006-11-19 09:12:39 AM  
yadda yadda.. "urging travelers to remember they can have 3-ounce bottles or less"

What prevents you from having 10, three ounce bottles in a 1 quart bag filled with the same liquid? (with 2 ounces to spare!!)

and what prevents 10 terrorists all carrying their 32 Ounces of liquid goodness to try to .... take over the plane by squeezing liquid on everyone?? or whatever the hell you do with liquids?

This is wicked stupid.
 
2006-11-19 09:12:58 AM  
When I travel home this Thanksgiving, I will be driving and can take whatever I damn well please.

/Unless the cops pull me over en route
//not that i could consume that much
/or build a bomb
///in 20 minutes
 
2006-11-19 09:13:08 AM  
Man, I can't tell you how much safer this makes me feel!

//wiping tear from eye
///still afraid of runaway parade balloons
////and slashies
 
2006-11-19 09:13:28 AM  
paranand
I would take my chances with the cheap airline. Probably because I value my freedom, and because I realize the security at the regular airlines means dick.

If you really wanted to kill a lot of people set off a bomb in the security line at a major airport. Their are hundreds of people bunched together. Plus the stampede out would kill even more people.
 
2006-11-19 09:13:55 AM  
you can bring a four pound laptop but not a bottle of shampoo
 
2006-11-19 09:14:01 AM  
I wonder if some idiot has had to put his tube of KY Jelly in the clear plastic bag.
 
2006-11-19 09:14:52 AM  
"Are mp3 players still now allowed, but Sony laptop batteries are? I'm still confused on that one."

yeah, that has never been the case.

you've been doing a lot of driving for nothing.
 
2006-11-19 09:15:41 AM  
I blame the geys...
 
2006-11-19 09:16:55 AM  
If you really were planning some sort of liquid in flight attack, couldn't you use a catheter to fill your bladder with said liquid?
Or swallow a bag of it ? Or shove the bottle up your butt?


/Must not mention near Homeland Security or the security process will get even worse.
 
2006-11-19 09:17:22 AM  
Old News....but true.

Those security personal are underqualfied and overworked, don't make their job any harder than has to be. They can't handle it. They will gladly pass their problems down to you.

They should have a seperate line for men and women b/c those women have so much useless crapola they hold up the line.
 
2006-11-19 09:17:58 AM  
This is why I fly 172's from private airports.
 
2006-11-19 09:18:14 AM  
I blame the geys...


trilux.org

Be on the lookout... oh, wait. Never mind.
 
2006-11-19 09:18:35 AM  
Always remember folks, the 9/11 hijackers didn't have a single illegal item with them. A boxcutter was perfectly legal because it me the blade length criteria. I could do the same amount of damage with a metal ink pen. Be just like an ice pick as far as the human body is concerned. The difference now is that the passengers wouldn't let it happen. Before 9/11 the passengers mostly didn't feel endangered, just inconvenienced. That is the real post 9/11 change. The security stuff is all theatrical window dressing to make the sheep feel safer.
 
2006-11-19 09:18:36 AM  
Dave Chappelle swallowed a tube of lighter fluid tied to a string in Con Air and set that indian on fire.

"Help! The Last Mohican is burnin'!"
 
2006-11-19 09:19:23 AM  
The TSA's ruling in late September followed a six-week ban of carry-on gels and liquids on all planes, ordered on Aug. 10 after an alleged plot to bomb U.S.-bound jetliners was foiled.

img144.imageshack.us
 
2006-11-19 09:21:17 AM  
Step 1. Wait in line at TSA screening thing while holding a 2-liter bottle of soda that you really like.

Step 2. Continue to wait in line until you're notified (probably by the lady checking IDs and tickets in advance, but hopefully by the goons at the scanner) that you will not be allowed to cross with that bottle.

Step 3. After being told that you can't take the bottle with you, apologize, excuse yourself, and stand next to the line, chugging soda as quickly as possible.

Step 4. Discard empty bottle and return to (hopefully short)line.

Step 5. When the same goon that notified you beforehand is within one or two feet, look him right in the face and release the largest belch of your life.

Step 6. Exclaim, while laughing, that you guess it really was explosive.

Step 7. Read about your performance art piece on Fark.
 
2006-11-19 09:21:24 AM  
www.wondermark.com
 
2006-11-19 09:23:52 AM  
So you fill at least one bottle in little ziploc baggie with pepper juice, or something that burns badly when introduced to eyeballs. When on plane, remove other items from baggie, pour burny eyeball solution into ziplog baggie and inflate with air, seal. Punch tiny hole in baggie, use pressure to create spray. Take over the food service cart by taking airline hostess hostage. Erm...
 
2006-11-19 09:25:21 AM  
So you fill at least one bottle in little ziploc baggie with pepper juice, or something that burns badly when introduced to eyeballs. When on plane, remove other items from baggie, pour burny eyeball solution into ziplog baggie and inflate with air, seal. Punch tiny hole in baggie, use pressure to create spray. Take over the food service cart by taking airline hostess hostage. Erm...

You got that from McGuyver.
 
2006-11-19 09:25:38 AM  
Had a guy next to me complain up and down that he wanted his large toothpaste to go with him and that he "didn't appreciate" it being taken away. Yeah I'm sure the TSA worker gives a crap. He kept on repeating that "didn't appreciate line"

Now I think this is idiotic, but that's the rules. Why complain to the grunts about it? Just shut up and get on the plane.
 
2006-11-19 09:26:02 AM  
gocheesego: So you fill at least one bottle in little ziploc baggie with pepper juice, or something that burns badly when introduced to eyeballs. When on plane, remove other items from baggie, pour burny eyeball solution into ziplog baggie and inflate with air, seal. Punch tiny hole in baggie, use pressure to create spray. Take over the food service cart by taking airline hostess hostage. Erm...

Have fun in Gitmo, turrist
 
2006-11-19 09:28:30 AM  
I HAVE A LIQUID!!!! AND I'M NOT AFRAID TO USE IT!!!
/guy in front of me last weekend had a 4 oz. container of blueberry jam confiscated. Phew! Just THINK of the damage he coulda caused with that!
 
2006-11-19 09:31:16 AM  
NineInchNader: Be on the lookout... oh, wait. Never mind.

I wish the grays ran the country...
 
2006-11-19 09:31:18 AM  
Well, Al Qaeda's objective was to hurt our economy w/the 9/11 attacks. How much does all the lost productivity from going through odious security cost the economy?

I absolutely hate flying, now. I won't say it's like getting my teeth pulled, but all the waiting sucks. And I strongly suspect it doesn't really do much aside from inconconveniencing all of us.
 
2006-11-19 09:31:25 AM  
And don't carry any of these gels or liquids unobscured in your pants pockets either.
 
2006-11-19 09:31:39 AM  
gocheesego: So you fill at least one bottle in little ziploc baggie with pepper juice, or something that burns badly when introduced to eyeballs. When on plane, remove other items from baggie, pour burny eyeball solution into ziplog baggie and inflate with air, seal. Punch tiny hole in baggie, use pressure to create spray. Take over the food service cart by taking airline hostess hostage. Erm...

Step three is profit!
 
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