The plot thickens!

Wow. Submitter is so going to hell.

He wants us to know that he was molested as a child! Boo hoo!

/headline makes my head asplode

submitter, your headline is the family guy of fark cliches.

<something happens> due to <insert obscure comment here and hope people laugh>

Can we please let it die already?

Finally my Amish tech shares will start their upturn

The pain....the pain... please... stop...

no more submissions for me unless they're this evil

submitter: Stocks rise on news that Mark Foley was molested by Amish school shooter

Bad headline, English. But the Amish would forgive you--somehow.

Well, if it was that traumatic (I doubt it happened) why didn't he seek help?

/Sick of B.S. excuses

I laughed...

/one ticket please
//window seat also
///Ice water concession is mine so BACKOFF!!!!

LandOfChocolate:

I don't get it either. Most cliches were at least funny at one time... and usually for only one time, but this one just blows. Hard.

too bad Foley wasn't in school that day

/too many Republitards, not enough ammo
/***JUST KIDDING*** ... [doorbell] Now who could that be? ... Wow, look at all the guns! ... But I am lying face down on the ground ... Sir Yes Sir ... ow! ... OK, I'll kneel facing the wall, but why do you wa

DIAF, submitter.

There is nothing funny about what that shooter did to that Amish community. There are 5 innocent children dead as a result of that loser. Christ, the Amish had nothing to do with that guy's problems, yet he took out his frustrastions on them because it was convenient.

Your place in hell is reserved and waiting for you.

Was it an Amish stingray ?

well done submitter.

I lol'd

/I'll take aisle
//And the chicken

How about Lotion futures?

Loreweaver:

I was gonna make a smarmy remark about self-righteousness but then checked your profile. I can understand a lack of humor when things hit - literally - a little close to home.

I wish people could quit hating bush long enough to realize that the economy is farking great right now and just enjoy it for a while.

Sorry kids, wrong thread.

/Redfaced

LandOfChocolate surrenders.

LandOfChocolate wants steak.

And now the LandOfChocolate trifecta is complete.

Comic genius.

LandOfChocolate


It was a trap.

Not news: Dog bites man. News: Man bites dog. LandOfChocolate: Dog and man bite hippo.

I see what you did there, subby...

Here comes the cliche parade
/land of chocolate

I love you guys. C'mon, group hug!

come'on. it wasn't that bad. I kinda sorta chuckled a little

Headline was absolutely PERFECT, submitter. One of the funniest fark headlines ever.

the only thing worse than a fark cliche is the group of people that cannot stop whining about their overuse.

Yes, we all get it. It's an overused fark cliche.

No, it will never die. Get over it.

If he were Amish there would be no incriminating IM or emails...

I will sponsor a Total Fark account for any currently practicing Amish who were offended by the headline.

I, for one, welcome our new LandOfChocolate overlords.

For Christ's sake, we're makin fun of dead & dying Amish School children now.

Submitter, you're not worthy to lick the sweat off my sac. drtgda

at least the Amish are spared from LOC's sillyness

I'm sorry, but anytime small children are victimized, I cannot find any humor in making jokes involving the victims and/or the perpetrator(s).

And since the shooting happened 15 minutes from my home, my outrage is magnified that people continue to make jokes about the incident.

For the record:
- The gunman was NOT Amish; the victims were.
- His victims had absolutely nothing to do with his problems. He took out his problems on them because it was convenient for him.
- He didn't just burst in and shoot people randomly like you read about in other shootings. He held the children hostage, tied them up, then shot them execution style.
- He then took the easy way out and shot himself.

/I need to go outside and vent now

Actually, it is dorks like you, FLYNAVY, that are being made fun of.

If what Foley did is an issue, then he should have been apprehended long ago. And how many is he accused of harming? Several thousands just like the terrorists?

And the Amish children. Sure, it is horrific, but more kids will die in falls and traffic accidents than in that.

Both of these incidents are all about how most people are tolerant of all sorts of crimes, such as those committed by our president that have harmed hundreds of thousands. As soon as it gets to be really picturesque, though, you go 100% obsessed. Suddenly everything is about the kid raping politico. Then suddenly everything is about a school shooter.

Never mind that the rest of your politicians are corrupt and evil, neven mind that most kids are at constant risk of violence from other kids, just focus on the scary weirdos and nothing else needs to enter the mind.

In my opinion the creeps like FLYNAVY who think these random crimes give them absolute infinite license to scream at others should all be taken out and shot. Learn some statistics or something about your society and then you will realize how far off the 'OMG scary weirdo!!1" routine is.

Try reading Culture of Fear by Barry Glassner some time if you ever care to learn the truth. Too busy focusing on the irrelevant and being manipulated? Off you go then, sheep person.

LandOfChocolate is sick and tired of fark cliches. EVERYONE PANIC!

The headline is correct, but confusing. Confusing sentences should be rewritten.

Loreweaver: DIAF, submitter.

There is nothing funny about what that shooter did to that Amish community. There are 5 innocent children dead as a result of that loser. Christ, the Amish had nothing to do with that guy's problems, yet he took out his frustrastions on them because it was convenient.

Your place in hell is reserved and waiting for you.

Lighten up Francis

Haha, I just came back into this thread.

Well done folks.

Best headline of the decade!

Submitter loses 3 points. One for keeping that ridiculous oil price cliche alive, one for referencing Mark Foley and making me go out and buy more mind bleach, and a third for trying to make a horribly tasteless joke about the tragedy that happened to those little girls.

Submitter must now roll a 1000 on a 1000-sided-die or DIAF. Or, even worse, lose his/her ability to post mind-numbingly idiotic crap on Fark.