Myth #11: Bartenders are not as whiny as waiters/waitresses.

I love bartending (side job at my neighborhood bar) because my boss lets me drink while I work.

Sounds like it was written after a particularly nasty close in a busy college bar.

And tone down the ego just a touch, sparky. Yes we who sling drinks are minor gods, but you don't have to go around boasting about how much ass you can get to everyone.

You know what I hate? This. People who work for tips biatching about how they don't get enough tips. Maybe if they didn't have such a shiatty attitude all the time, I would be more willing to give them money.

I did a brief stint as a pizza driver, and while I do think you should always tip the pizza guy (I mean, he brought you food!), I didn't get all butthurt if someone didn't tip. It's part of the job.

/Get a helmet, whiners

abdul: In college I delivered pizzas in Harrisonburg, Virginia. There's a big mennonite community there. They never tipped. Frugality or cultural thing, I don't know.

But this was offset by the scantily clad college girls who would give a bonghit as a tip.

/Of course I never kept their phone numbers after a delivery.

Wow. What a whiny biatch.

Just reading that makes me want to go to whatever bar this guy works at, whistle at him, hesitate before giving my order, then tossing the farker a seven cent tip. Then I'll offer him 100 dollars if he can explain explain what the Pollard rho method is. That should be easy money, since all bartenders are smarter than I am...

I usually tip waitresses and waitors more than bartenders. Bartenders seem to have some kind of strange superiority complex, like pouring alcohol into a little glass is more difficult than remembering a whole table of food and drink, and then carrying 5 full meals on a giant frizbee. And on top of that, you get to hear any complaints about how the food isn't up to par.

Yeah, bartenders have it so bad.

SockMonkeyHolocaust: Oh bullshiat. You pulled me at worst lager or at best a can of Colt 45. You deserve an occasional tip for fast, prompt service. Give that attitude to the asses down the way who asked for specialty drinks on a Friday at 10:00.

Olde City is teh sucks.

On drinks I tip $1 per drink.

More if you're hot

0 if you're tending to hot patrons before me and I was in line first.

Or arbitraily like $10 or $20.

Big Merl: My tips are proportional to the amount of Captain in my Coke.

So if I dip all seven inches of The Captain in your coke, what'll that get me?

"Tipping a dollar per drink is your obligation by virtue of stepping through the door and walking up to the bar."

Where are you working and what seasonal extradonaire are you offering? Get over yourself, you provide alchohol to people willing to pay.

I'm not sure that I've ever been to a bar where the bartender would get $1 per drink tip. I've been to very busy bars where if they got $1 per drink, they would be making $50 or $60 per hour extra. Sorry, they just aren't worth that much money.

So, in summary, you're the smartest, coolest, hardest partying, savvyest people on earth.

But you're working at a job you hate, for minimum wage plus tips, and, god dammit, us jerks, morons, and lightweights don't tip enough.

SockMonkeyHolocaust: The only time I drink there is during the $5 martini happy hour at Bleu Martini on Thursdays and then on over to Drinkers where they have $1 bottles of MGDs or over to the Khyber where they have the $2 PBRs.

Yeah, I'll drink Appletinis when they are $5, what of it? I got class out the ass.

That place on 2nd and Church is good, too. I forget what it's called.

Most bartenders I've talked to love their jobs. But then I don't know a lot of whiny people.

Seriously, I'm not tipping a dollar per drink either regularly. It varies per bar, night and what I order when I tip but that is excessive for your average bar.
Myth 3: You can out-drink the bartender.
In a word: no.

There's a joke in there somewhere about his "whine" and how some bars also serve "wine", and the two sound the same, and it's like, you know, funny.

Seriously, though, working in the nightlife industry (not as a bar person) I can truthfully say that I've seen far more ignorant customers than decent ones. "Hey. Yo! HEY!" is not the best way to get speedy service. Neither is spending 90 seconds waiting for your turn at the jam-packed bar, only to turn to your friend and say "Oh, what did I want to try?".

To that same end, I'm the customer, and you're the service provider. If your service sucks, fark you, you're not getting a tip. If your service is lukewarm, half-assed, and nothing short of completely average, you're getting a buck or so per drink. If you've made any effort whatsoever to provide even the slightest atmosphere or personality, there's your $5-$10 per round plus another 20% - 50% when I close my tab.

Guy like this? Probably zero.

Myth 5: Whistling to get a bartender's attention is appropriate.

If the bartender wants a dollar tip, he damn well best respond to my whistle. Honestly, it's just a way of getting attention. WTF? There's a bar full of people and I wanat I goddamn drink. I could drink at home, and the bartender would get no tip. Bartenders are in the service industry, and they should be at my beck and call, whether it be a whistle, or a hearty "Hey farkFACE, what's it take to get a drink 'round here?" And I'm a good tipper, providing I get decent service, which I do most of the time.

onecanshort: What a whiny coont.

The author is a dude. A whiney, Poli Sci grad who does weak-ass entertainment section "journalism" like restaurant descriptions for dining guides, and rating local golf courses.

What a choad.

Myth 9: Bartenders are responsible for you. Yes, it's called TIPS training. Bartenders are not supposed to serve people they recognize to be intoxicated. They really skirted the issue on this one by bringing up tipping for drinks again.

onecanshort: No wonder she's biatching about tips

OMG! It was a woman writing that? She deserves no respect at all. NONE. Stupid whiny biatch should be servicing me sexually, for free, as that is woman's place in society. C'mon, am I right folks?

SmashLimousines: Bartenders are in the service industry, and they should be at my beck and call, whether it be a whistle, or a hearty "Hey farkFACE, what's it take to get a drink 'round here?"

Bet you get a lot of short pours.

The writer of this article is guy, guys. Just like any good bar, they put a cute chick's face up front to get your attention.

A whiney biatch of a guy, but a guy.

Bartenders are not rock stars,
thank heavens he cleared that up!!
for some reason, i now want to be in a dim room with lots of neon and mirrors and loud music, sippin' a sierra

Eddie_Dean_NY: Just like any good bar submission, they put a cute chick's face up front to get your attention approved.

Writer is a whiny-ass biatch who needs to seek another line of work.

To wit: I worked a dance club in Denver four nights a week. Once figured out that I poured +/- one drink every 45 seconds for four and a half hours. Occasional dollar tips, but usually just the change from rounding up on the drink charge (e.g. $.75 on a $2.25 beer 'cause they gave me $3 and said keep the change). At a "keep the change" average of $.675 per drink (which factors in the dollar tippers and the stiffers) multiplied by an average of 720 drinks a shift, I made $476 per shift.

I found it easy to live on $2 grand a week in the late 80's, considering all my drinks were free, and at all the after parties the 'tenders were treated like gods.

Downside was the whole experience was hell on my sinuses. #~)

EnoMan, well played.

As a bartender, I can assure you all we are not all this whiny. I expect two things as a bartender: politeness, and a tip proportional to the service I provide. If I miss you for 5 minutes and it's unexcusable, don't tip me, I didn't earn it. If it's extremely busy, and i'm alone, be patient, and leave me a half decent tip, because I'm trying. This guy is a total douche who needs to get off his high horse (guess what, we're not retarded, but we're also not PhD.'s doing this for fun). Remind me to never go to this idiot's bar...

ecmoRandomNumbers: No, Princess Bartender, y

funny the assumption it was a female. the minute i started reading, instinctively i knew that the chick in the picture did NOT write the article. and then i read the by-line

Eddie_Dean_NY: EnoMan, well played.


/blush
//curtsy
///drink

floor9: There's a joke in there somewhere about his "whine"

how 'bout
his cheese was gouda, but his wine made everybody TANNIC

/stolen from yesterday

So, in summary, you're the smartest, coolest, hardest partying, savvyest people on earth.

But you're working at a job you hate, for minimum wage plus tips, and, god dammit, us jerks, morons, and lightweights don't tip enough.

thread winner

This is making me thirsty. I'll be back later to see how ugly this gets after it hits the main page...

Eddie_Dean_NY: Bet you get a lot of short pours.

It's hard being the only drunk, sarcastic MFer on TF. Everyone else is so serious. I heart you.

I hate that expression, and I don't love you, though I predict we'd be bosom buddies if not for these lonesome, hell-monsoon miles between us. I am cyber-circling your left nip with my index finger right now.

I didn't know that most bartenders had advanced degrees and were jeopardy champs.
Well, I guess that explains the medieval french poetry major.

/learn something new every day

Myth 1: Bartenders have the best job.

If you think it sucks, quit and get something better. Otherwise, suck it up and shut up.

Myth 2: Bartenders love their jobs.

See #1.

Myth 3: You can out-drink the bartender.

Oh, so you're an alcoholic with a job that allows it? See #1.

Myth 4: Bartenders need to earn tips.

Now you're complaining about your pay? Maybe stop being such a dumb biatch, and find a place that pays over minimum. I know several good bartenders who make well over minimum wage. Tips are a bonus to good bartenders, not needed to survive.

Myth 5: Whistling to get a bartender's attention is appropriate.

Ummm, duh? Usually flashing a $20 works, just like dealing with a hooker or a drug dealer.

Myth 6: Bartenders will wait for you.

If they want a tip (see also #4) they will.

Myth 7: You're smarter than the bartender.

You pour beer and make rum & cokes for a living. Do you really want to get into a discussion about group policy settings with me? If so, find a real job.

Myth 8: Bartenders remember everybody's name.

If you want a good tip, you won't ask what tab I'm on after my third $20+ order.

Myth 9: Bartenders are responsible for you.

If the service is shiatty enough I break a drink and don't care, I obviously don't care about you either. You really want your tip? Clean it up, now.

Myth 10: Bartenders want your phone number.

Yeah, that's a typical chick. Lots of chicks get too many numbers to count. So do lots of guys. You think you're special because you can pour a beer and stick a napkin under it?

1: That was an incredibly annoying read. They're whining way too much.

2: Here's how I tip: If I'm ordering beers, I tip 15% of the total bill if the service is decent/good. If the service is great, 25%.

If I'm ordering mixed drinks, I tip 75%-100% for the first drink. If the next drink is strong enough to make my eyes water, I keep the tips coming. If not, I'll tip 5% for the total bill.