If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(metroactive.com)   Top 10 bartender myths   (metroactive.com) divider line 494
    More: Interesting  
•       •       •

58543 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Aug 2006 at 5:34 AM (8 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



494 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | » | Last | Show all
 
2006-08-17 12:04:39 PM
adenosine

bonesdilligaf: the well gins (stuff you get if you dont specify) are serious garbage...

I drink a lot of gimlets. Let me tell you, they are the king of well drinks because they taste EXACTLY the same with bottom shelf or top shelf gin. The bottom shelf actually tastes a bit more complex because they tend to have a stronger juniper flavor that cuts through the Rose's lime.

like i said its just an fyi
many well brands are not bad, but most of the shiatty ones will give you a major bad head next morning as appossed to the better filtered ones...
 
2006-08-17 12:08:16 PM
adenosine I drink a lot of gimlets. Let me tell you, they are the king of well drinks because they taste EXACTLY the same with bottom shelf or top shelf gin.

That is cool, but one day you should graduate to Hendrick's on ice with a squeeze of lime.
 
2006-08-17 12:08:20 PM
DaSwankOne [TotalFark]

mr finger /musician

Let me put this in a way you will understand. The same guy that doesn't tip for good service and whistles to get the bartender's attention is usually the same guy that thinks it is still funny to yell, "Play Freebird!

heheh

they look like this guy too
imagescommerce.bcentral.com
 
2006-08-17 12:09:18 PM
I like to tip a dollar per drink right off the bat to kind of grease the skids. i went to this superdive bar in my town, i love the place: 80 cent draft Busch or Bud, 1 dollar shots (all kinds of weird stuff) and bottled beer is only 2 bucks. so i get 2 of the draft Busch's for me and my brother (total cost = 1.60, duh) and give the guy 4 bucks. to me it's worth it and maybe he'll throw down some freebie shots later or keep me from getting stabbed by a wino, right? (a distince possibility in this bar). he goes "you know these are only 80 cents each right?" I told him at the point, he just became the greatest bartender ever, by realizing that he was OVERtipped and thinkiing I was crazy.
 
2006-08-17 12:11:24 PM
My bartenders ROCK!

They're friendly as hell, put up with all sorts of shiat that I couldn't put up with, and they're always Johnny on the Spot with a refill. For such great service I tip the hell out of them.

Probably 90 percent of bartenders have college degrees or master's degrees and can most likely whoop your ass at Jeopardy.

My bartenders *are* smart but I can kick their ass at NTN any time.

/come to Muddy Waters, Deerfield Beach, FL
 
2006-08-17 12:14:21 PM
2006-08-17 12:02:16 PM DaSwankOne

You ain't telling me anything I don't already know.

I'll put it to you like this: I'm the musician, but bartenders like this (and I've seen a lot of em), are the "rock stars".

The cool ones (and there are a lot of those too) are the ones that realize that they, just like I, are providing a service like any other...in this case, we're both babysitting drunks. No ego, no glamor, and certainly no entitlement. This would be like me saying "If you don't put a $5 in the tip jar expect our next break to be 45 minutes long."
 
2006-08-17 12:15:52 PM
I've never met a bartender that I couldn't drink under the table.

/possesses an inhuman ability to drink a LOT of alcohol
//doesn't drink often though
///I can usually make about $50-$200 at Packers games on drinking bets
////Blew a .46 once, and I was still coherent
//SLASHIES!
 
2006-08-17 12:17:07 PM
mr finger
"If you don't put a $5 in the tip jar expect our next break to be 45 minutes long."

as compared to what 40 mins?
hehehe
/hates when good bands take long breaks
//wishes bad bands would stay on break
 
2006-08-17 12:18:23 PM
www.psistar.co.uk
 
2006-08-17 12:19:41 PM
As someone who is a sysadmin and was a bartender I can say that, of the 2 groups, sysadmins have more overpaid, lazy whiners in their ranks than bartenders.


/justsayin'
 
2006-08-17 12:25:53 PM
Kenyonite

I like martinis, too. But it is like she said...when people want a drink that takes a couple of minutes to make, then say it's "pretty" good...it means you've wasted precious minutes catering to one client, not several. The "perfect" drink is something I myself have never tasted, either. Rich people demand perfection, and it's added pressure to try and achieve that lofty goal.

On the Mojito side, it's just that you have to have about seven ingredients to make it like it's supposed to taste (sugar-cane stirrers included)...and even the swanky bars usually don't have those items in immediate vicinity. It takes longer to make it right, therefore taking time from you other impatient customers.

DaSwankOne

I work at a members only country club. It's a pretty good gig right now, but tonight (free martinis from 5-???) will surely change my thoughts. At least it's only once a month, but instead of a capacity Friday crowd of 160, tonight will be overflowing throughout the "fluff" side of the club with around 500-800 patrons. I'm not looking forward to that on a short staff, too. Hopefully the tips will counter the 10 hour day that awaits starting at 1pm.
 
2006-08-17 12:26:47 PM
Bartenders do want your phone number...

at least the one I'm dating now did.

:)
 
2006-08-17 12:27:49 PM
2006-08-17 12:19:41 PM Skitz
As a sysadmin by day and musician by night, I can say I work harder as a musician just loading my gear into the club than I do as a sysadmin all day, yet I get paid 10 times as much.

I work alone, so I don't whine unless it's on Fark...but I am lazy and overpaid.
 
2006-08-17 12:31:22 PM
Real rules of bartending
1.) we have an awsome job. if we didn't like it we would get another job. dealing with drunks can get old but that is the name of the game.

2.) i don't know about other bartenders but there is no way you could out drink me or the people i work with. i live in the land of alcoholics, wyoming. we party harder than any of our patrons.

3.) tips is an acronym. to insure prompt service. want stiff drinks quickly? tip well. a dollar and a little courtesy goes a long way. you don't have to drop $20's every time just a smile, a thanks, and a buck or two.

4.) don't ever whistle. that is really obnoxious.

5.) if a bartender want a tip we'll wait but no make our job a pain in the arse. know what you want and order it. it make out job easier.

6.) no you probably aren't smarter than the bartender but that is because you're hammered. but at my bar all of our tending staff is well educated.

7.) i know most of our patrons names. it's good business and it helps me keep fights from esclating.

8.) we are somewhat responsable for out patrons to an extent. we are the ones getting you obliterated so it's our job to cut you off, yank you keys, and call you a cab.

9.) if you are a smokin' hottie, yes, i would like your #. one of the best parts of working behind the bar is all the beautiful girls i see every night, but the sexiest girls i see at the bar are the ones i work with.

10.) don't ever, ever try to get in the mix while a bartender and/or bouncer is dealing with a fight, and if you swing on a bartender/bouncer prepare to get your arse beat to a pulp.

last call.) yes, we are rockstars. heven't you ever seen cocktail?
 
2006-08-17 12:32:08 PM
2006-08-17 12:26:47 PM vegasj


Bartenders do want your phone number...

at least the one I'm dating now did.

:)


Well, she did want my phone number, but you weren't supposed to know about it...
 
2006-08-17 12:36:30 PM
2006-08-17 12:31:22 PM captainstew

*Swoon

/sarcasm
 
2006-08-17 12:36:31 PM
zabbers: I like to tip a dollar per drink right off the bat to kind of grease the skids. i went to this superdive bar in my town, i love the place: 80 cent draft Busch or Bud, 1 dollar shots (all kinds of weird stuff) and bottled beer is only 2 bucks. so i get 2 of the draft Busch's for me and my brother (total cost = 1.60, duh) and give the guy 4 bucks. to me it's worth it and maybe he'll throw down some freebie shots later or keep me from getting stabbed by a wino, right? (a distince possibility in this bar). he goes "you know these are only 80 cents each right?" I told him at the point, he just became the greatest bartender ever, by realizing that he was OVERtipped and thinkiing I was crazy.

I tipped a guy two bux at this bar/club (they alowed minors in). I thought it was an OK tip because he had to get a step stool to get the liquor I wanted. I got doubles the rest of the night for free. If 2 bux gets you doubles all night, I seriously wonder about his client base.
 
2006-08-17 12:40:46 PM
Myth # 12 - Farkers are not alcoholics

The fact that this thread is so impassioned and has lasted this long proves the contrary.
 
2006-08-17 12:42:19 PM
If you order good scotch or expensive bourbon, a good tip will pay for itself when they pour longer.
 
2006-08-17 12:42:33 PM
DaSwankOne: Myth # 12 - Farkers are not alcoholics

I'm not an alky. I only drink on days that end with 'y'.
 
2006-08-17 12:43:44 PM
Myth #1 about bar patrons: We care about the wellbeing of bartenders and want to make sure they can sleep at night thinking they are so unique that they need a 'top ten list of myths'.

Actually, while we do care if you live or die, thats it. Serve us cold beer and quick. If you want to act like a douche there are several other bartenders that would want our business and would probablly do a backflip for it. (Or at least twirl around some bottles for it)
 
2006-08-17 12:45:52 PM
If you want to act like a douche there are several other bartenders that would want our business and would probablly do a backflip for it.

Or at least show some professionalism and quality.
 
2006-08-17 12:46:55 PM
Sorry, I in no way have to tip you for serving me an already overpriced drink. Ask for a raise or get another job if you need more money to live on. Don't expect extra money.
 
2006-08-17 12:49:39 PM
WELL after all this at least you could light my cigarette for me.
wait what.. no smoking

well then no tip for you...hehe
 
2006-08-17 12:54:18 PM
finiamh Sorry, I in no way have to tip you for serving me an already overpriced drink. Ask for a raise or get another job if you need more money to live on. Don't expect extra money.

Don't drink at the same place much, eh? If you do I hope for your sake that no bartenders have an extra bottle of Visine laying around.
 
2006-08-17 12:59:45 PM
captainstew: 3.) tips is an acronym. to insure prompt service. want stiff drinks quickly? tip well. a dollar and a little courtesy goes a long way. you don't have to drop $20's every time just a smile, a thanks, and a buck or two.


Now theres a bonafide myth for you.

Speaking of education, please learn the difference between insure and ensure.
 
2006-08-17 01:01:09 PM
That list did prove what they said about myth #2, this person really doesn't like thier job.

p.s. Don't tell me what to tip. I do so according to the service I get. The owner pays you to pour drinks, I supplement that if you do it well. usually it is a buck or better, but nothing is automatic, anywhere, ever.
 
2006-08-17 01:02:44 PM
Not tipping US$1 is a great way to either never get served, or else never get a heavy pour. But as usual, the boys on fark know better, don't they?

Well, I know better than to go to bars where the service staff thinks it's okay to treat me like shiat if I don't voluntarily overpay for every drink I order.

I tip generously for mixed drinks, for the first couple rounds at least. If the second one is not stronger than the first as a show of appreciation for the last tip I left you, don't expect the same gratuity for the third.
 
2006-08-17 01:04:52 PM
Err...what's a yarbel?
 
2006-08-17 01:11:55 PM
Kim Perrin is a ho...fo sho.

Myth 3: You can out-drink the bartender.
Myth 7: You're smarter than the bartender.

So by this logic, all bartenders can drink more and are smarter than the average person. Riiight.
 
2006-08-17 01:12:02 PM
Well, I'm late to this party, but OMG what a whiny piece of shiite. "We need good tips." You NEED to get a better job and stop whining. I can count the number of good bartenders I've had with 1 hand, because I've still never had a good one. Seriously, I have never once in my entire life had a good bartender. I've had good wait staff, but never good bar staff. They're always surly and short tempered (men as well as women) and I'm not very hard to please.

My favorite was when I ordered a particular brandy and the bartendress says, "are you sure? most people don't like that." WTF?!? 1. The customer is always right. 2. If I had wanted your advice I'd have asked for it you stupid beesnatch. Needless to say I counted out my tip in leftover pennies...
 
2006-08-17 01:18:09 PM
RashSuperlative

cant say as i blame you...
well, i can blame your bartender experiance on you though..
choose better places..
no seriously..
i know it is true, many people are just like you..
they never had the experiance of being waited on by a good or great bartender...
and if they did they only ordered a beer, so couldnt make a distinction...
well i hope you do one day find yourself entering a bar with a good bartender, so you can experiance the differance and appreciate it
 
2006-08-17 01:19:50 PM
ecmoRandomNumbers: Well, that was a painfully arrogant read.

No, Princess Bartender, you are NOT the end-all, be-all of professions. You are not a doctor, and you're not a martyr. And you DON'T deserve good tips on short pours.


DESERVES TO BE REPEATED

sorry honey, but nobody gives a shiat about you...so just shut up, continue to look pretty, and hurry up with that drink. if you're female, and working the bar, that truth should've been learned awhile ago.

/seriously
//if its "just work"
///then STFU and GBTW, ho.
////girls love to be bartenders for the attn, and the quasi-whore image
 
2006-08-17 01:22:51 PM
www.t-shirthumor.com
 
2006-08-17 01:29:02 PM
adenosine: I'm not an alky. I only drink on days that end with 'y'.

Good thing you're not Spanish.
 
2006-08-17 01:31:39 PM
captainstew: 3.) tips is an acronym. to insure prompt service. want stiff drinks quickly? tip well. a dollar and a little courtesy goes a long way.

Wrong-o Chuckleston. I'm tipping you because you gave me good service this time, not as a down payment on good service next time.
 
2006-08-17 01:32:24 PM
bonesdilligaf:

Well, a couple of the places I've been were pretty nice (swanky name-brand motel bars and the like). And a few uppity places in Scottsdale, AZ when I was there on business. But still no luck...

I'm sure you're right; I just need to figure out how to find these good bars =) In the meantime I prefer to drink at home anyway... less cab fare, less $$. But I would love to have an excellent bartender someday.
 
2006-08-17 01:33:11 PM
But seriously, I'm positive the bartender is in love with me.

The bartenders I've gotten to know personally (outside of the bar) were working toward their Master's degrees and all had harsh words for their job. Nonetheless, I'd take it over cleaning out port-a-johns.
 
2006-08-17 01:40:24 PM
I've got a tip for ya, don't eat yellow snow. Now get me a motherfarking coldie ya douchenozzle.
 
2006-08-17 01:40:53 PM
In San Francisco, a dollar a drink is a given and is probably taken for granted, but when I tipped that much in a pub in Roanoke VA, I was treated like a queen all night. That felt nice.

At my usual Friday hangout, I always overtip and am rewarded with free drinks every time, even though I occasionally do annoying things like ask the bartender to choose a drink for me.
 
2006-08-17 01:43:05 PM
Just my $.02 worth...

Former bartender and server, college town.

Bartenders are not entitled to anything.

Bartenders and servers (at least in Florida) are paid 1/2 minimum wage. That's right, HALF of the legal minimum wage for a job. The tips are an expected part of the occupation. Without them, for the time I was working in the restaurant/bar, I would have taken home $2.125 per hour.

When you work in a high volume bar, I can remember all of the drinks people AT the bar are drinking. The people who walk up and buy drinks and then disappear are harder to keep track of. Especially when it is a different person buying the next round.

The author needs to see a proctologist to remove whatever is stuck in their arse.

As a server, I would never write orders down for my tables, and everything came out fine. Same with my bartending days. Everyone regardless of race, sex, attractiveness, orientation, physical handicap, malicious odor was treated the same until they did something to deserve otherwise.

Killians was domestic. Yuengling was considered a microbrew, even though they bottle more Yuengling than they should to be considered a true microbrew. Same with Sam adams, Blue Moon, etc.

Whistling and shouting "hey," while not preferred, will still get you service along with an introduction so you can call me by name later on.

For me, just average service gets you 15%. You take care of me and get at least 20%. If I brought my cracker crumbling, food dropping, drink spilling kids with me it goes up to 25%.

Servers do give bartenders 1-2% of their total sales for the day, as a certain portion of the server's tip came from the bartender's service. Bartenders tip 1-2% of sales to the "expo" (person who puts your food, sides, garnish, sauces together on the plate and gets it ready for delivery to table/bar) and 1-2% of their sales to the barback who keeps glasses clean, brings up the extra liquor from the stock area, changes kegs.

It is a tough life to leave. You get paid cash nightly, rarely miss a sporting event as you usually get to watch sports while working, have the occasional drink (some establishments frown upon this), meet tons of people, and work with people who can appreciate that your evening truly does not begin until 2-3 AM.

Plus, hostesses are loose.
 
2006-08-17 01:47:37 PM
"Probably 90 percent of bartenders have college degrees or master's degrees and can most likely whoop your ass at Jeopardy"

67% of statistics are made up on the spot.
 
2006-08-17 01:58:34 PM
Bartenders will get a good tip (15-20% of the tab...or more) for the folowing:
+ being pleasant & courteous (automatic 20% tip)
+ pouring enough liquor into my mixed drink for me to taste it
+ pouring more than a thimbleful of wine into my wine glass
+ actually serving me the drink I ordered

Bartenders will NOT get a good tip for the following:
- being rude & obnoxious, or referring to me as honey/baby/sweetcheeks/darlin'/you with the tits
- charging me $8 for a tiny glass of warm, dreg-filled Merlot you decanted from a box
- serving me some fruity frou-frou "hip" drink instead of the Guinness Stout I ordered, because even though we've never met you just know I'll like the Appletini better
- charging me $2.50 for the glass of tap water I'm having as the DD
 
2006-08-17 02:04:30 PM
Myth: ALL bartenders go on Fear Factor.

Only most of them do.

http://images.google.com/images?svnum=10&hl=en&lr=&q=fear+factor+bartender
 
2006-08-17 02:10:13 PM
SockMonkeyHolocaust-

/all about teh dives and the dank


Tatoo Mom's - South St.

dirty and dank... write on the wall, spit on the floor and fark on the couch.

/seriously, don't sit on the couch
 
2006-08-17 02:40:12 PM
my junior year, i worked at a mexican place that stayed open for an hour after the bars closed. from the shiat we had to deal with, i can only imagine the hell they must put the bartenders through. my fullest sympathies. i am getting way more dick about service people farking my shiat up lately, but really, i'll wait for the bartender.
 
2006-08-17 02:48:18 PM
Yes, the author is a whiney punk. If his type is serving me when I get to the bar, I'll move to another zone or absent that, leave.

Still, I will tip $1 per drink even if its freaking club soda. If I can't afford an extra buck per drink, than I'm drinking in the back of the closet at home where the wife won't know.

I'm an early bird, so the bar generally isn't crowded. I'll be friendly & talk to the bartender if it'll make them happy, but they're under no obligation to chat me up. A tip and a friendly attitude will go a long way to long pulls & comps (which are followed by a tip equal to the price of the drink).

I go once every two or three weeks, for 45 minutes to an hour, and guess what, all the bartenders know my name, greet me with a smile, and almost never charge for that first one which is in front of me as soon as I'm set & comfortable.

I'm there for a good, relaxing time. If an extra buck per drink will ensure that, which it does, than its money well spent.

Still, the author needs to get the sand out of his vagina.
 
2006-08-17 02:57:25 PM
Might be a little late, but anyone reading this ... here's what I do and it works great. Open a tab at the beginning of the night, tip your usual 15-20% at the end, keep note of who's working, names if you ask, and who serves you good / bad. Find a good bartender that looks after ya, pours good drinks, and is actually personable. Go back to that person several times over the next month or so. If, after only tipping a typical amount that bartender still recognizes you and does his job well, hand him a $20 or more and say "hey, you always look out for me and my friends, you're a nice person and good bartender, I respect that, this is for you, not the bar, put this in your pocket and have a good night." This will make a good bartender a great one because he remembers you're a cool person. I've done this several times and from then on you get great service, well poured drinks and they remember you. do it too late and they'll be upset because you don't tip, do it too early and they'll blow it off as a drunk ... give em bout a month.
 
2006-08-17 02:59:57 PM
AudioStatic82

So you're saying that bribes are required for good service?

Fark that, I'm the paying customer!
 
2006-08-17 03:00:40 PM
on a side note, I find that guys are usually better bartenders because girls expect tips for looking good and guys are just working or enjoying themselves. If you find a girl that is actually a good bartender, she either thinks you're cute or is a nice person in general. Regardless, they deserved to be tipped well.
 
Displayed 50 of 494 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | » | Last | Show all



This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report