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(TAG! You're it!)   Schools look to ban "tag" and other fun activities. Why do U.S. schools hate kids?   ( divider line
    More: Stupid  
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11839 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jul 2006 at 11:16 AM (11 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

346 Comments     (+0 »)

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2006-07-10 11:34:46 AM  
I see the brainwashing is in full effect. Yes schools ban "tag" because of lawsuits...yes thats the reason. It isn't because the recess monitor just wants to stand and gossip with the other teachers on the edge of the playground.
2006-07-10 11:35:04 AM  
Ok, fine, you win. Ban tag, and dodgeball, and fun on the playgrounds. But please leave the lead painted swing sets for the kids to chew on.
2006-07-10 11:35:33 AM  
TwoBitFratWhore: Goddammit. I'm just not having kids.

What's the point? We're not allowed to raise them! Homeschooling is considered child abuse by some and God forbid if you don't put a helmet, elbow pads, and knee pads on your kid when they want to ride their tricycle.
2006-07-10 11:35:53 AM  
Don't forget your Prozium kids.

/stinking Liberals
2006-07-10 11:37:11 AM  
Adman12: These kids will never elect a President. Somebody would have to lose an election. Instead, I'm thinking they'll just give every candidate a participation award.


Excellent play sir.. excellent play.
2006-07-10 11:37:12 AM  
2006-07-10 11:20:58 AM SuperCrackMonkey

This is so old. I read this in the Washington Post two weeks ago. I actually read a real, paper newspaper every day. Can you believe it? They drop it off at my house and everything!

Don't they have to cross your lawn to get the newspaper to your house?

2006-07-10 11:37:33 AM  
TwoBitFratWhore: Goddammit. I'm just not having kids.

But TwoBit, how will the next generation have any gingerettes?
2006-07-10 11:37:45 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Best freaking piece of playground equipment EVAR.
2006-07-10 11:39:06 AM  
TwoBitFratWhore: Goddammit. I'm just not having kids.

See what this is doing.. now this fine peice of tail will never procreate and create even more fine peices of tail for all the little future farkers (and possibly farkettes)

Damn this world... damn it all to hell!

/cries out like Heston at the end of Planet of the Apes
2006-07-10 11:39:09 AM  
IdBeCrazyIf: *golfclap*

Excellent play sir.. excellent play.

Let me know if anyone ends up ripping that off on TV or radio.
2006-07-10 11:39:50 AM  
Kids need to fall down and get hurt in order to grown up normally. Kids get hurt, get used to it. They are made to get back up.
2006-07-10 11:40:06 AM  
I remember being 9 years old passing an afternoon throwing chucks of bricks at each other in the woods behind a friends house. We weren't trying to kill each other, just wing someone now and then.

/Good times....
2006-07-10 11:40:22 AM  
In my day, we didn't have safety precautions so we wouldn't get hurt on the playground. In my day we played tag and red rover and kill the guy with the ball and relivio, and kick the can and dodgeball. You'd get hit with a ball and say hey look at me, I've got a big red welt on my ass. We'd go home with scratched knees, bloody noses, and dirty hands. AND WE LIKED IT!!! WE LOVED IT!!!

In my day we didn't have XBox, Game Cube, and PSP. In my day we had a brown and black box that had games that had lousy graphics. The games sucked so much we went outside and ran around and didn't have big asses. AND WE LIKED IT!!! WE LOVED IT!!!

And that's the way it was, and that's the way we liked it. Flibbity floo!!!
2006-07-10 11:40:39 AM  
our playground had monkey bars over a pool of HCl, a slide with knives on either side, about 10, all the way down which would land you in a pool of iodine, we had one of those marry go round things surrounded by a moat, which was inhabited by pirranah with butter on the handle bars
2006-07-10 11:40:59 AM  
Great Caesar's Toast, Adman12, IdBeCrazyIf

Did you guys wear onions on your belt too?

/'cause that was the style at the time.
2006-07-10 11:41:27 AM  
RichMeatyTaste: I remember being 9 years old passing an afternoon throwing chucks of bricks at each other in the woods behind a friends house. We weren't trying to kill each other, just wing someone now and then.

Oh man, remember dirt clod fights?
2006-07-10 11:41:53 AM  
Slapping, hitting and pushing? Pah! Go back in time and watch my friends and I play Ninja Soccer, then tell me how violent Tag is. If you didn't come in bleeding, you were playing it wrong.
2006-07-10 11:41:56 AM  
my son interrupted and told her "Lady, it's fun going outside!"

It's past 11:30am by me, and this is the first non-depressing thing I've laid eyes on all day.

Your kid rocks.
2006-07-10 11:42:12 AM  
Dick Gozinya: Did you guys wear onions on your belt too?

Pfft! In the '70s, an onion on the belt was considered too uptight, man.
2006-07-10 11:42:54 AM  
DOH! We threw chunks of bricks as well....
2006-07-10 11:43:00 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2006-07-10 11:44:17 AM  
Chinese freeze tag, in the shower?
2006-07-10 11:44:46 AM  
tag's fun unless you were the slow fat kid like me that gets tagged all the time. kind of like the slowest wilderbeast being dragged down by a lion
2006-07-10 11:44:52 AM  
Dario, thanks, once it is even a glimmer of warm, I spend about 90% of my weekend time outside, and just about every week night. The 18month old is another otuside fanatic. I've been "lectured" by parents, and pre schools, and busybodies about the fact that both my kids have tans. it's Teh EVIL SUN. I usually just reply "You have to be farkign kidding me?!?!"
2006-07-10 11:44:53 AM  
I don't see the problem with tag so long as the kids wear thier helmets and knee/shin/elbow pads... ya know? wtf?
2006-07-10 11:45:08 AM  
Goddammit. I'm just not having kids.

You must reconsider. My future kids need a friend to help him or her beat up these fragile wussies and rule the playground.

/used to take a lot of guts to challenge and be King of the Hill
//apparently, now they just take turns standing at the top
///in alphabetical order, backwards, to be fair
2006-07-10 11:46:05 AM  
RichMeatyTaste: DOH! We threw chunks of bricks as well....

That reminds me of an old MAD magazine cartoon about a kid bragging to his father about how tough he was for throwing rocks at some other kid. The father responded by saying: "so what, we did that when I was a kid too. But our rocks were harder..."
2006-07-10 11:46:35 AM  
next will be no running and no talking.

/after that recess will be replaced by fourth meal
//no fruit or vegetables.
///water also banned.
////good luck fatties
2006-07-10 11:46:41 AM  
Did that in a construction zone when we were 13-14 for about a month nearly every day. We would throw them from the roof of the second story too. Sure it hurt when we got hit, but it was FUN.
I'm glad I'm not a kid today.
Times have changed WAY TOO MUCH since I was a kid and I'm only 21 now.
2006-07-10 11:46:48 AM  
I don't think that people realize that the generation that started this trend is already in HS and University. Profs are getting calls from parents about how 21 year old Timmy can't finish his lab report or the 19 year old Suzie's grades are too low. This trend of coddling kids has been around for the past 20 years or so.

Kids need to play a bit rough, fall down, and break a bone once in awhile. It teaches them limits and also how to be brave and not a big cry baby. Adults just have to take it upon themselves not to get litigious if Christy needs a cast.

/Bring back lawn darts!
//Long live trampolines!!
2006-07-10 11:46:48 AM  
Dirt clod fights ruled!

Public education has long sense abandoned educating kids and is now some sort of social experiment of the worst kind. Mandatory attendace at public schools wasn't about education in the first place, it came about during the depression to keep kids occupied and out of trouble.
2006-07-10 11:47:15 AM  
tag's fun unless you were the slow fat kid like me that gets tagged all the time. kind of like the slowest wilderbeast being dragged down by a lion

Now our children will not be given important lessons like this. Nor will they learn that hitting hurts. Or that fun is, uh, fun.
2006-07-10 11:47:18 AM  
The most popular game on my playground was "Smear the Queer". It was essentially tag, but you had to tackle the other person for them to become "It". No pads or any of hat shiat, little pebbles all over the ground, and plenty of large jungle-gym style stuff to tackle other kids into. Good times. Not sure about teaching hateful shiat/words, but it sure toughens you up.

/ elementray school in upstate South Carolina RRRRRROCKED!!
2006-07-10 11:47:20 AM  
Is it just me or did this riculous pussification of the education system happen really fast? When I was in elementary school (which was not that long ago ::adjusts onion-belt::), we had woodchips and pebbles on the playground; asphalt and brick on the blacktop; metal bars, swings, and other instruments of torture all over the place; and our "games" generally involved chucking hard objects at each other and had names like "smear the queer."

This all seems to have happened in less than 10 years, am I right on this? I don't even want to think what's going to happen in the next few years.
2006-07-10 11:47:35 AM  
I can't tell when this started exactly. I'm only 23 and I had plenty of playground equipment to get hurt on. A few things did happen though:

1. They banned rugby. Probably smart since no one really knew the rules, it was just full contact soccer where you could tackle people and carry the ball.
2. They took out a wobbly 20' tall slide. That was directly responsible for at least a broken leg per month. Another smart decision.
3. They removed the merry-go-round made of solid rust. They put in a new softer rubber one. (It also went soooo much faster. That was dangerous, and soooo much fun.

Most of the monkey bars and such were over sand rather than gravel -- it may have been less hard-core than some, but it probably made us braver and dumber than if we had a legitimate fear of falling.
2006-07-10 11:47:54 AM  
SuperDuper28: They do still have recess,right?
Not in this area. Two weeks ago, I went to do a presentation on rocks & minerals to a group of Grade 4 students. I asked the principal when the recess would be and she told me they no longer have recess, it's now an 'activity period' followed by a 'nutrition break'. Huh?
Also, another depressing fact regarding our schools. Out of appx. 60 fourth-graders, four could not read. I mean, at all. They couldn't even read the word 'rock' or 'blue'. It's enough to make you shake your head in despair.
2006-07-10 11:48:59 AM  
What about Smear the Queer? Or is that too offensive? They could change it to 'Catch the Alternative Lifestyle representative'

//dodgeball was fun
///when are they gonna ban football?
2006-07-10 11:49:04 AM  

yeah, always have a friend that's fatter and slower than you are. Women seem to have caught on to this idea while at social gatherings
2006-07-10 11:49:17 AM  
Banning Tag? What in the sugar frosted hell? When I was a kid, we played tackle football in the street. My blood is 7% asphalt.
2006-07-10 11:50:33 AM  
I love it that my kids can go to school and relieve their aggression by inappropriate behavior in a simple game of tag. Luckily, being 4th & 5th Graders, they've already learned that the real name for Dodgeball is "Smear the Queer". I'm happy when they come home with tales of terror on the playground. "Dad, we grabbed Elisa and made her ride the spinning thing til she puked....I some got on me, wanna smell it?"

This is completely 100% normal behavior for children. Even Dr Spock Followers now agree that his book was bullshiat.

I don't want my kids to be lemmings. Or timid, self-absorbed breast feeders. I want them to be rude, loud and proud of who they are so NO ONE will fark with them.
2006-07-10 11:51:11 AM  
Other things I used to do that would probably get my parents sued for millions of dollars include: throwing water bombs at cars, making sparkler bombs, making huge fires in the storm water drains, hitting other kids with cricket bats, fights, play fight kickboxing with full on action, brandy (tag but where you have to throw the tennis ball at them, climbing onto the roof of buildings, knick-knocking, letting other kids bike tyres down etc etc

I could go on for days.
I miss being a kid.
2006-07-10 11:51:32 AM  
Average movie, good quote: "Why do we fall? To learn how to pick ourselves up."
2006-07-10 11:51:35 AM  
Bad news- The people of this generation will be unmotivated, spineless, and fat.

Good news- You can get as many of the women as you want, their pussy male counterparts won't stop you.

Bad news- You won't want very many of 'em.
2006-07-10 11:51:47 AM  
Back in my day, I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night half an hour before I went to bed, drink a cup of sulphuric acid, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad and our Mum would kill us and dance about on our grave singing Hallelujah.

And you try and tell the young people of today that... they won't believe you.

/good times.
2006-07-10 11:52:17 AM  
This pussification started about 1980. That is the approximate date that they replaced our elementary school's pavement playground with slightly less hard pea gravel. That's right, rocks. Next, they switched to wood chips. Then to rubberized ground. Now, they won't even let you run. They can't make the environment any safer, so they have started in on making the kids safer. Rubber suits were too bulky, so they went straight to don't do it.

Tom Sawyer cries a little each time one of these stories hits the news. (Of course, he died from some cat bourne illness he got when he was swinging cats around his head by their tails.)
2006-07-10 11:53:16 AM  
I remember when i was really young staying at a child care place and I thought that, as many of did, if I believed enough I could jump out of a tree house and fly. Of course I fell and landed hard and burt myself. Not badly but enough to get well bruised. My mom had just come to pick me up and saw me right after I landed. Did she turn to the caretaker and sue? No, she picked me up by my arm popped me in the back of the head and asked me if I thought it I learned that I couldn't fly. Through snot bubble crying I said yes and I walked away shortly wiht a good lesson.

I guess Im lucky I didn't kill myself jumping that far as a kid but ah well.

/Remeber the good ole days of lick for lick. So many wonderful purple-green bruises.
2006-07-10 11:54:23 AM  
Next step? Ban music.
You might hurt the poor lil darlin's ear drums
2006-07-10 11:54:54 AM  
Behold, liberalism at it's finest!

/reason number #325 that they need to restore ideological sanity to our schools
2006-07-10 11:54:59 AM  
TwoBitFratWhore: This all seems to have happened in less than 10 years, am I right on this? I don't even want to think what's going to happen in the next few years.

Things won't necessarily keep going the way they're going. They won't ever be the way they were before, but this wussification isn't an inevitable progression.

I know lots of Gen-X parents like myself who want our kids to have the opportunity to learn from their own mistakes. Not being irresponsible, mind you, but also not being afraid of every little boo-boo and disappointment. There is a reasonable middle ground.
2006-07-10 11:55:38 AM  
So can kids still buy dart guns? What about those guns that threw those plastic discs? We used to have cool wars with those (although their accuracy sucked).
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