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(CapAlert)   Scooby Doo is doo   (capalert.com) divider line 124
    More: Obvious  
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12848 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Jun 2002 at 8:41 AM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2002-06-14 08:44:00 AM
Scooby doo can doo doo- but jimmy carter is smarter
 
2002-06-14 08:48:30 AM
Ummm...didn't we see this already?
 
2002-06-14 08:48:57 AM
Ah-roo, troo Scrooby-dooo post?

Damn those medling kids.
 
2002-06-14 08:49:09 AM

Ah, CAP. Now I know that I want to see Scooby Doo!

If it were not for Daphne's main outfit, the scoring would have been much higher. When a young woman repeatedly exposes the skin of her chest below her breast line and much of the skin of her breasts by wearing a very wide and low cut dress throughout a show, it is considered excessive.
An exposed SMG? Sign me up!
 
2002-06-14 08:49:10 AM
Daphne's head under Scooby's tail

I think she wanted a Scooby Snack
 
2002-06-14 08:49:55 AM
Boy, the religous right sure does suck. Not as bad as this movie, of course, but anyone opposed to "revealing the female form" is more of a zombie than anything cooked up in a Scooby Doo plot.
 
2002-06-14 08:50:39 AM
CAP reviewer unfavorably compares acting in "Scooby Doo" to "Ass Pirates XXIII." Then procedes to have homoerotic fantasies about Fred.

Or, you could read the far-less-interesting article.
 
2002-06-14 08:50:47 AM

Nifty, even Cappy knows the truth about Scrappy!

But Scrappy is not at all likable. For bouncing around the Mysterymobile like the adolescent on too much sugar and for urinating on Daphne's chest, Scrappy is kicked out of the Mysterymobile and left on the side of the road. Indeed, Scrappy is demonic and bitter with a hugely misshapen grotesque head of monstrous proportions and features and an attitude to match.
 
G2V
2002-06-14 08:53:20 AM
Cap Alert - At least it's not Funny school name #17


Anyway, at least they bash Scrappy. Did anyone ever like him? Da-da-dah da dah. Whatever.
 
2002-06-14 08:53:59 AM
* comic violence
* Daphne's head under Scooby's tail
* suggestive eye movement
* sculpture nudity
* suggestion of intoxication

Naked statues!?! Comic violence!?! Why don't they just sacrifice newborn babies to Beelzebub while they're at it. Oh, the horror!

Think of the children! Won't somebody think of the children?

Save us Lord from suggestive eye movements!
 
fb-
2002-06-14 08:54:21 AM
Osama bin Laden is to Islam as Cap is to Christianity.
 
2002-06-14 08:54:34 AM
Wow, Capalert and Scooby Doo. Two massive failures in one post.
 
HPZ [TotalFark]
2002-06-14 08:54:54 AM
Wouldn't a better headline be "Scooby Doo be doo?"
 
Sho
2002-06-14 08:56:07 AM
Thats sad... really, really sad.
 
HPZ [TotalFark]
2002-06-14 08:56:11 AM
Fb-- Where can I read bin Laden's review of "Mary Kate and Ashley go to Paris?"
 
2002-06-14 08:56:42 AM
"Scrappy urinating on Daphne's chest "


woah, sounds like a movie you'd download off the internet, not see in theaters.
 
2002-06-14 08:58:44 AM
"sculpture nudity"

John Ashcroft?
 
2002-06-14 08:59:41 AM
What kind of kooky god would taunt us with creamy breast skin?!?!?!
 
2002-06-14 09:00:24 AM
Those fundies sure do watch a lot of movies! Here are the rest of their reviews... http://www.capalert.com/capreports/
 
2002-06-14 09:00:47 AM

What I liked most about CAP's review of Scooby Doo:

comic violenceaction violencedemon attack violenceflatulation/burping contest (obviously one of the greater forms of blasphemy?)camera angle to force viewer on private parts (No, no, no you can't make me!)suggestion of intoxication (Obviously not a Girls Gone Wild fan)Offense to God:"skull" thememultiple demon possessions (no one can eat just one?)Gratuitous slam on Scrappy DooMost interesting to note, this guy consistently uses the "lingo" of Scooby Doo. Somehow, after years of exposure to the EVILS of television, our CAPpy writer has maintained his connection with the Almighty. Obviously he's just trying to protect the rest of us from the unspeakable evil he had to endure. Lovely.
 
2002-06-14 09:01:21 AM
"Scrappy urinating on Daphne's chest"

That SOB said that he wouldn't write Scrappy into the movie.
He said he hated the little farker and would make sure he
was no part of the film. Lying bastard.

~,~

-Hyatus
"da da da"
 
2002-06-14 09:01:33 AM
You know, I thought some farker was making a stupid joke with his talk of "Your name means Scooby poop" in another thread. But then I saw another Scooby ad.

I'm truly astounded. And embittered at the world.
 
2002-06-14 09:01:39 AM
facial piercings
punk dress
massive tattoos
suggestive eye movement
suggestion of intoxication


I don't remember the bible verse "thou shalt not have massive tattoos or piercings or move your eyes suggestively or urinate on Scooby Doo"

I find it amusing that the rating system spells out WISDOM.
 
2002-06-14 09:02:28 AM
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2002-06-14 09:03:52 AM
"doobie doobie doo...."
"Beware the Penguins"
 
2002-06-14 09:03:57 AM
On another note, I hit some crazy button on this computer machine and now all the text on fark and some other sites is bigger and more obnoxious. Anyone know what I did?!

The text in this window that I'm typing in is normal, though.
 
fb-
2002-06-14 09:04:08 AM
"Scrappy urinating on Daphne's chest"

Am I the only one that got a monster erection after reading that?
 
2002-06-14 09:05:23 AM
When a young woman repeatedly exposes the skin of her chest below her breast line and much of the skin of her breasts by wearing a very wide and low cut dress throughout a show, it is considered excessive.

We can thank the christians for upholding moral standards.

How do you spell "stupid fu©kwit fundies"?
 
2002-06-14 09:06:04 AM
Cunnelatio, if you're using Internet Explorer, click "View", "Text Size", and choose something like "Medium".
 
2002-06-14 09:06:18 AM
Fb- - Considering it's Scrappy Doo we're talkin about here....yeah, I'd say so.
 
2002-06-14 09:07:33 AM
"
Sex/Homosexuality (S):


dressing to maximize the female form and or skin exposure throughout
suggestive eye movement
camera angle to force viewer on private parts
sculpture nudity
revealing swim wear
"I can look at myself naked" "Stop touching me" with actress touching herself
inappropriate touch
crotch hit
"


"Crotch Hit" is by far my fave! HA HA!

 
2002-06-14 09:07:37 AM
They should review 'Where the boys aren't 15'
 
2002-06-14 09:07:55 AM
Yep, it's the suggestive eye movements that getme every time. Mmmm... Eye Movement...
 
2002-06-14 09:08:18 AM
Doh, I feel stupid. Thanks Stevarooni.
 
2002-06-14 09:08:50 AM
I like the review of Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back:

"at least 224 uses of the most foul of the foul words"
"at least 184 uses of the rest of the three/four letter word vocabulary"
"flatulence - repeatedly"
"Gay. Straight. It's all the same."
"'pity me because I am black' sequence "
"song of foul words"
"vulgar display re: erection (clothed)"
"self touching - repeatedly, some vulgar "
(but some gooooood)



The review is huge. Including "suggestive eye movement"
 
fb-
2002-06-14 09:08:51 AM
I suprised Cap can find the time to review all these movies, with his busy child molesting schedule and all.
 
2002-06-14 09:09:40 AM
Try Clicking View=Text Size=Medium. Should help.
 
2002-06-14 09:11:04 AM
Egads, read their review of American History X. Great movie, and the entire movie obviously went right over their heads.

They apparently take offense to 'real life' and think any movie not based on the bible is the seed of evil.
 
2002-06-14 09:13:06 AM
Any movie not based on the bible IS the seed of evil. I could tell you were a sinner when I read your name!! Don't worry, you'll pay for your sins when you are burning in Hell!!! Oh, you'll pay!!
 
2002-06-14 09:13:32 AM
He touched on suggestive eye movement in the Resident Evil movie too, except his offense to it was the tough female character who had her head bowed and was sort of looking through her eyebrows. His concern was that teeny-bopper girls would see the movie, start walking around looking through their eyebrows, and then repeatedly go down on each other.

No, really.
 
2002-06-14 09:14:42 AM
I saw Scooby on wednesday...interesting film, I enjoyed references to the pup named scooby doo cartoon.

What was the curse word hidden behind a popular whatsit?

yea...scrappy doo...who wants spoilers?

-Satchmo
 
2002-06-14 09:14:49 AM
Since so many movies are so clearly the work of Satan and all his little wizards, why don't they just opt to stop watching them?

Makes more sense than repeatedly polluting your mind just so you can tell everybody the apparently self-evident truth about how disgusting a movie is.

Or would this be considered an act of martyrdom and self-sacrifice?
 
2002-06-14 09:17:16 AM
# Sex/Homosexuality (S):
# dressing to maximize the female form and or skin exposure throughout
# suggestive eye movement
# camera angle to force viewer on private parts
# sculpture nudity
# revealing swim wear
# "I can look at myself naked" "Stop touching me" with actress touching herself
# inappropriate touch
# crotch hit


I have never been so turned on in my life.
 
2002-06-14 09:17:28 AM
Exactly, makes me wonder how they can gather such a detailed analysis (wait, that word had ANAL in it) of these movies.
 
2002-06-14 09:17:51 AM
I have to throw my 2 cents in here (no, not 'mytwocents').
I grew up watching Scooby-Doo and all the other Saturday cartoons.
(I say Saturday cause the damn cartoons used to go all freakin' day!)
Anyway, Scooby-Doo became an abomination when Scrappy came along.
(I refuse to watch anything containing the offspring of Scooby, Velma & Satan)
Furthermore, I refuse to watch or be subjected to a gay-ass live action
Scooby flick containing anyone other than Jeneanne Garofolo (sp) as Velma,
or any Velma taller than 'Daphne' for cripesakes.
Hollyweird can kiss my large, hairy, white, bulbous ass.

Ruh-oh Raggy, re ruck!
Like, I know wathcha mean 'ol buddy.
 
2002-06-14 09:23:31 AM
Ok, sorry to spoil, but I'm bored

Scrappy is the villian of the film.

Velma is farkin hot. Much hotter than Daphne. I have killed several kittens thanks to the new Velma

Scrappy doo is the devil, and the movie confirms MY suspicion, that the band Sugar Ray is evil.

-Satch
 
2002-06-14 09:27:33 AM
/nick crotch_hit
 
jph
2002-06-14 09:29:32 AM
I'm all over that scene about Daphne touching herself.
 
2002-06-14 09:30:05 AM
Ironically, this is the first review of this movie that makes me want to see it.
Also you can't help but wonder how sheltered the people are who write these reviews they they cant pick up all the drug references that everyone else seemed to notice.
 
2002-06-14 09:33:47 AM
The most amusing part about this is the bible contains all of the things they frown upon in movies. Genocide, incest, rape, slavery, torture, etc.

But it was God who killed millions in the flood, and God who destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah, and God who ordered the Israelites to slaughter entire populations, including women and children, so I guess it's OK.
 
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