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(Some Accept/Except Guy)   Jaake Gyllenhaal aangers Gulf War v2.0 veteraans, saays they did jaack squaat aaccept haang aaround their tents aand maasturbaate aan haave spaank paarties aand yaank they daamn craanks   (starpulse.com) divider line 33
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1921 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 29 Apr 2006 at 5:36 PM (8 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



33 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2006-04-29 02:34:16 PM  
Uh, do you pay attention to other links posted? Go back to the total fark homepage and count down about ten links.
 
2006-04-29 02:39:32 PM  
TerminalEchoes: Go back to the total fark homepage and count down about ten links.


LOL! Welcome to Fark.
New?
 
2006-04-29 02:48:45 PM  
this shoulda been a newsflash.
 
2006-04-29 02:51:37 PM  
Who's got that "no choking chickens/spanking monkeys. etc." image...
 
2006-04-29 03:00:07 PM  
Heroic Poser: "LOL! Welcome to Fark.
New?
"

Hahahaha as a matter of fact...yes!
 
2006-04-29 03:51:12 PM  
submitter: Jaake Gyllenhaal aangers Gulf War v2.0 veteraans, saays they did jaack squaat

No, he said Gulf War v1.0 veterans did jack squat for months. And if you'd seen the movie, read the book, or lived through that war, you'll know he's right.

Jeez, some people will get offended by anything. (Not this submitter, obviously, but another link labels him "Dumbass")
 
2006-04-29 04:24:00 PM  
No. He said, "The US soldiers were sent to the desert for 122 days and they sat in the same tent and did nothing, except a little too much masturbating."


Just a juvenile, uninformed comment from a punk kid who thinks that because he played a soldier in a movie that he knows what it's really all about. Typical twenty-something. And while we're on the subject, Little Jake was what? Ten years old during Gulf War I?

Consider the source.
 
2006-04-29 04:30:03 PM  
There's a typo in the headline; it's "except", not "aaccept".
 
2006-04-29 04:30:55 PM  
They're jealous because they can't quit him.
 
2006-04-29 04:37:48 PM  
Ghost Rider


So wait, are you saying that the majority of soldiers did more than sit around in tents and masturbate for 122 days, or are you just bashing Gyllenhaal?
 
2006-04-29 05:03:33 PM  
Whaat h2ogaate saaid.
 
2006-04-29 05:06:42 PM  
TerminalEchoes: Go back to the total fark homepage and count down about ten links.

But this one got a greeeenliiiiight... neener neener.
 
2006-04-29 06:04:20 PM  
War is 90% unbearable boredom and 10% sheer terror. A buddy of mine in the marines sits on his ass and plays Halo2, Madden, etcoontil he has a patrol. He's begged us to send him porno mags so he has something else to do.
 
2006-04-29 06:13:27 PM  
Uhh, why would he research the amount of time the troops spent masturbating? Is he preparing to open some freaky new fetish site?

Do deserts get you hot?
Do masturbating military men make you all wet and sticky?
Then don't delay, check out www.gyllenhaallovessandysoldierspermshowers.com right now!
And then shoot yourself, you sad little sickie. (With your "rifle", not your "gun.")
 
2006-04-29 06:19:41 PM  
Do masturbating military men make you all wet and sticky?
Then don't delay, check out www.gyllenhaallovessandysoldierspermshowers.com right now!


That link is broken, could you repost?
 
2006-04-29 06:34:20 PM  
h2ogate
I think that submitter was doing a play on words. The source is "(Some Accept/Except Guy)."
 
2006-04-29 06:38:00 PM  
I don't know why the hell anyone who's ever starred in a (movie/TV show/informercial) suddenly believes that they're a shrewd political analyst.

Why yes, I made a movie about the gulf war, now I know the real story.

Puhleeze. Shut your stupid mouth and get back to doing something you're more qualified to do -like snorting cocaine. I don't know who I would want running the country but it sure isn't a schmuck like Jake Gylenhaaaaaal.
 
2006-04-29 07:28:06 PM  
and he's incorrect how?
 
2006-04-29 07:47:31 PM  
For the great majority of soldiers and marines the majority of the time, this was probably true. However, to think that any war exists without supreme violence and intensly personal carnage is the height of ignorance. Gyllenhaal's personifies the extreme edge of Hollywood elitist tripe with such a declaration. I hope for his sake that this quote was utterly out of context and that he's not really this stupid.
 
2006-04-29 08:05:31 PM  
Guilty.
 
2006-04-29 09:30:10 PM  
HumbleGod: No, he said Gulf War v1.0 veterans did jack squat for months

I was going to make the same criticism, but the submitter could actually be correct. If you regard the Iran-Iraq war of the 1980s as the First Gulf War (it was commonly referred to as the "Gulf War" at the time), then the liberation of Kuwait would be Gulf War II. The current war would be Gulf War III, which makes sense because like the final parts of most trilogies, this episode sucks.
 
2006-04-29 10:38:15 PM  
That's super. I'm more interested in his hot ass sister.
 
2006-04-30 11:54:43 AM  
HumbleGod

No, he said Gulf War v1.0 veterans did jack squat for months. And if you'd seen the movie, read the book, or lived through that war, you'll know he's right.,

I'm curious how you equate the three. If you had said simply that you had lived through it, I'd accept your having agreement. To put actual experience on par with reading a book or watching a movie is rather silly; at best they can only capture a slice.

I'd recommend reading "One Bullet Away" by Nathaniel Fick for a better Gulf War II/III perspective.
 
2006-04-30 01:11:48 PM  
Jake would no doubt make a great addition to the nefarious group known as F.A.G.

/Please make Team America 2.0
 
2006-04-30 01:57:00 PM  
submitter was funny until he spelled "except" wrong...
 
2006-04-30 04:56:30 PM  
Jeez, some people need to relax. He just had a snide remark probably to some reporter. It's not like he's on a crusade saying that people involved in the Gulf War were not real soldiers and don't deserve any credit so we should erase their service to the country.
 
2006-04-30 07:43:47 PM  
Let's see him to to Iraq and say that to the soldiers over there. One less hollyweird punk would make for a good news day
 
2006-04-30 08:06:07 PM  
Jake Jill-in-hall had an Easter Island head in that movie.
 
2006-04-30 10:32:44 PM  
LondosHair: submitter was funny until he spelled "except" wrong...

He didn't spell it wrong, he used the wrong damn WORD.
 
2006-04-30 10:58:01 PM  
He's right. Next story, please.
 
2006-05-02 04:13:24 PM  
FARK YOU! Yeah, you.
/Gulf War widow
//yes, we exist

Okay, I feel better now.
 
2006-05-04 12:54:56 AM  
There are some things that may be just as true as (1=1)...okay, that was kind of lame, but you get the point...and yet there remains no value, none whatsoever, in pointing it out.

This is probably one of those things. Pointless. Some kid goes over there, and spends three months not doing anything, leave it up to the vet who actually did something to point it out just before the bar fight breaks out. As far as I'm concerned, if he was in the right place to get his ass shot off, he's a vet. And I'd think higher of Gylenhaal if he thought about it the same way.
 
2006-05-04 12:55:35 AM  
Oh and on a different subject, his sister is crazy hot.
 
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