"A Squirrel - with an olive?"

There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved...


than a dog and squirrel in the depths of an ether binge...

"That other squirrel had much bigger balls."

"Were you the one that took my nuts?"

"You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals, so lets do it like they do on the Discovery Channel."

"Is it true what they say about squirrel testicals?"

Crickey! There's a booger on that squirrel's nut!

It's bacon!!

Wait, no it's not

farking squirrel

"Hey, this isn't steak!"

Doorknob!

You said what about weiner dogs and nuts???

"Y halo thar, nutsecks?"

This tongue piercing aint working out for me.

"I'm a shy and hairy weiner."

Little did the dog know that he would meet the same fate after his death four years from now.

"Now look me in the eye and tell me you didn't tell Kavanaugh about the Armenian Money Train!"

"Blah, blah, blah, insert tired joke about huge squirrel nuts here."

I can lick my nuts too.

squirrel: you have perty eyes my dear

dog:thats right

squirrel: wanna do it?

Is that a nut your holding, or are you just glad to see me?"

"Why, I do declare, Sheriff! I wouldn't lay a paw on him!"

"I'm a hairy little weiner, and you?"

"O RLY?"

"bark bark bark"

\for teh win

"BUTTSECKS?"

Be mine, valentine!

"Pretty please? Look, I'm even giving you puppy dog eyes. No one can resist that!"

Loooook into my eyes! You are getting sleepy! Sleeeeeepy!

Dog: (looks squirrel up and down) "Daaaaaaamn!"

"You know, you can totally read my owner's home phone number on my tag. I sure hope no one posts this image to a website with a following of thousands of people."

"Farking nuts! I long for a grapefruit."

"Your dog wants nuts"

"Why wouldn't you look at me during?"

"You've got a nut, now here's something salty"

"How 'bout you let the D-O-Double-G bury deez nuts all up in dat ass Biatch!!1!"

No no, I want your other nuts.

"I work for a firm that sells nuts.

So I am really getting a kick out of most of your replies.

You are very good at making it sound like you know what you are talking about.

But trust me.... You don't.

I think you just want to make yourself sound smart, when in reality you dont know what you are talking about.

This is how bad info gets passed around.

If you dont know about the topic....Dont make yourself sound like you do.

Cuz some squirrels belive anything they hear."

Make one move and you're dead.

"I'd hit it."

"Why is Jon Levitz holding Clay Aiken's one remaining testicle for ransom?"

Dog - "My, what a pretty nut you have."

Squirrel - "All the better to T-Bag you with."

"How come I can only see 1 nut?"