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(EcoEnquirer)   Judge orders fisherman to apologize to bald eagle for violation of Endangered Species Act   ( ) divider line
    More: Stupid  
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5180 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Mar 2006 at 1:03 AM (11 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

53 Comments     (+0 »)

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2006-03-08 01:04:38 AM  
2006-03-08 01:04:46 AM  
2006-03-08 01:05:04 AM  
Werent they taken off the list?
2006-03-08 01:05:53 AM  
That stinks.
2006-03-08 01:06:57 AM  
rockforever: Werent they taken off the list?

uh, taken off of the "endangered" list yes, but they're still protected.
2006-03-08 01:07:25 AM  
and while you're at it - dress him up in a furry suit and make him apologise to the Big Bird

/not furries
//no, rly
2006-03-08 01:07:52 AM  
Ooooo.... Oder.... I see
2006-03-08 01:07:53 AM  
Headline fixed in 3... 2...

/Judge oders fisherman to apologize to bald eagle for violation of Endangered Species Act
//the original
2006-03-08 01:08:47 AM  
"The eagle had no comment."

2006-03-08 01:10:25 AM  
Well that stinks.
2006-03-08 01:10:32 AM  
That'll learn'em!
2006-03-08 01:11:19 AM  
I'll show you how to make a species endangered.

/Anyone old school enough to remember that?
//February 2002 to be precise
///I be talkin' about this and this and this.
////Good times, good times.
2006-03-08 01:11:40 AM  
Heh, guess I just read it as "Judge or fisherman to apologize to bald eagle for violation of Endangered Species Act"

Took me a minute to realize that it wasn't German, and that the submitter just can't spell today. ;)
2006-03-08 01:13:11 AM  
not *into* furries ..dammit
2006-03-08 01:13:39 AM  
Granted, it would've been oder, not oders, but that's neither here nor there... Especially considering the headline has been fixed, and it doesn't matter anymore.

/anyway, back to your regularly scheduled comments...
2006-03-08 01:19:04 AM  
Kill it and Grill it!
2006-03-08 01:20:01 AM  
That is so silly can you imagin apologising to a bird?

/// Seriously that is just weird man.
2006-03-08 01:30:27 AM  
2006-03-08 01:40:41 AM  
that specifically makes it illegal to " endangered or threatened species without a permit from the Secretary of the Department of the Interior."

"Sir, I would like to fark with some Bald Eagles"

"fill out these forms and you will get your permit in the mail within 4 to 6 weeks"
2006-03-08 01:44:07 AM  
They're endangered because they're absolutely delicious.

/Mmm, panda shanks in a red wine and rosemary sauce.
2006-03-08 01:51:59 AM  
"Mr. Williams was observed by a Fish and Wildlife Service officer trying to scare the eagle away by throwing stones at it."

Throwing stones at it? I'd crap my pants if one of those came in close. I'da shot it. Those things are huge.

/its coming right for us!
2006-03-08 01:53:06 AM  
The judge was lenient in sentencing, however, requiring only that the man apologize to the eagle.
2006-03-08 01:53:15 AM  
Maybe that eagle needed a visit from kindly Dr. Foot?
/Hold it right there, Dr. Foot
2006-03-08 01:54:22 AM  
This article is so fake. Everybody knows there are no African Americans in South Dakota.
2006-03-08 01:57:23 AM  
Meh, I think that the guy, if anything, was dooing the Eagle a favor. Would you rather the Eagle got the fishhood stuck in its throat?
2006-03-08 01:57:30 AM  
Thatguy: This article is so fake. Everybody knows there are no African Americans in South Dakota.

You owe me a new keyboard.

/because it's true
//none in montana either, from Great Falls
///"I can't deal with cold, we a tropical people"
2006-03-08 01:58:48 AM  
Not sure how that second O got into "doing"
2006-03-08 02:05:04 AM  
Wow, the people that actually cited him for the misdemeanor are total assholes.

Wouldn't that be your natural reaction if some eagle tried to steal the fish you're trying to catch? Jeez, I don't blame the guy.
2006-03-08 02:07:38 AM  
A permit to " endangered or threatened species without a permit from the Secretary of the Department of the Interior."

They have permits for that!?
2006-03-08 02:10:35 AM  
kwackers: They have permits for that!?

I was wondering the same thing.

/maybe they need to call them at three in the morning for research purposes.
2006-03-08 02:24:09 AM  
Stupid eagle.

/catch your own fish your scavenger
2006-03-08 02:25:18 AM
2006-03-08 02:35:35 AM
2006-03-08 02:43:24 AM  
I'm... GAARRRGHH AHH AHHHH MY EYE... Make it stop...
2006-03-08 03:13:00 AM  
Funny how they somehow caught the exact eagle that did it. HHhhhmmm, I'm guessing he appologized to the understudy bald eagle.
2006-03-08 03:15:14 AM  
Funny how many people think this article is real.
2006-03-08 03:20:10 AM

Actually, I could believe that South Dakota would be this wacky. I mean, they are.
2006-03-08 03:27:12 AM  
ugh, environmental satire ftl
2006-03-08 03:42:02 AM  
They're not endangered anymore so you can taunt them all you want.

Hell, I crank call them all the time now.

The REAL story, however, is the one about levitating islands in the Bermuda Triangle!

Same site, different URL. You figure it out.
2006-03-08 04:07:05 AM  
The EcoEnquirer is completly fake. That's its purpose. Check out their website about glaciers melting and turning into (with pics) of Gilligans Island.

For more fun check out the people that bring you the evils of DiHydrogen Monoxide (water) at
2006-03-08 04:22:16 AM
2006-03-08 05:22:38 AM  
That's a good way to get your eyes pecked out.
2006-03-08 05:58:20 AM  
only in America
2006-03-08 06:11:44 AM  
Ok, so Thatguy won the thread, but when the hell did bald eagles populate South Dakota?

With no remorse, I will say that I pitty all you po bastards that live in South Dakota. Seriously. Move. I'm not kidding.

/I hate North Dakota too
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2006-03-08 07:27:08 AM  
They have permits for that!?

If a protected bird decided to take up residence in your front yard and got upset when you went into your house, you could be allowed to keep living at home if you got a government permit to harrass the bird by walking too close to its nest.
2006-03-08 07:30:10 AM  
And this is why the world is going to Hell.
2006-03-08 07:51:27 AM  
I say this is a fake.
2006-03-08 07:59:23 AM  
it is fake-RTFD (Read The Farking Disclaimer)
2006-03-08 08:41:02 AM  
I say this is a fake.

Maybe they're just testing our faith?
2006-03-08 09:04:50 AM  
Karmacidal: Funny how many people think this article is real.

Including, apparently submitter/greenlighter who neglected to use the SATIRE tag.
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