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(Impact Lab)   The cat piano -- a 1650 device designed to torture cats to entertain royalty. Kinda like Siegfried & Roy   ( divider line
    More: Strange  
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36918 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Feb 2006 at 1:24 AM (11 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2006-02-21 10:48:03 PM  
Golf clap for headline.
2006-02-21 11:09:51 PM  
Right-click *save.
2006-02-21 11:39:43 PM  
Boobies at a TFer, thanks for the sponsorship, brad.

/Viva Mama Santas, or not
2006-02-21 11:39:50 PM  
Excellent! Between this and the cat juggling, my road as a carnival performer will be paved with gold.
2006-02-22 12:03:32 AM  
A conjugate to the mouse xylophone in that Monty Python sketch.
2006-02-22 12:09:50 AM  
I wonder if it could play the Meow Mix song?
2006-02-22 12:10:06 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2006-02-22 12:13:59 AM  
What a novel idea!
2006-02-22 12:53:30 AM  
they would have loved bonzai kittens!
2006-02-22 01:30:20 AM  
Monty Python either ripped this off or was ripped off.

Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. Ladies and gentlemen. I have in this box twenty-three white mice. Mice which have been painstakingly trained over the past few years, to squeak at a selected pitch. (he raises a mouse by its tail) This is E sharp... and this one is G. You get the general idea. Noe these mice are so arranged upon this rack, that when played in the correct order they will squeak 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you on the mouse organ 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Thank you.
He produces two mallets. He starts striking the mice while singing quietly 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Each downward stroke of the mallet brings a terribly squashing sound and the expiring squeak. It is quite clear that he is slaughtering the mice. The musical effect is poor. After the first few notes people are shouting 'Stop it, stop him someone, Oh my God'. He cheerfully takes a bow. He is hauled off by the floor manager.
Cut to a man holding up cards saying 'Marriage Counsellor'. The counsellor sits behind a desk. He puts down the card and says:
Counsellor Next!
2006-02-22 01:30:33 AM  
I put $300 on Paws 'N Claws. come on kitty, daddy needs a new pair of shoes!

/cats look like they're in racing stalls
//horrible joke
///i just took an ambien
2006-02-22 01:36:08 AM  
How come the piano has more keys than cats?
2006-02-22 01:36:51 AM  
This instrument will be used to compose the eventual theme song for the Boobies tag.
2006-02-22 01:37:51 AM  
It might just be my allergies talking, but I think cats are evil and should be tortured
2006-02-22 01:38:02 AM  
It doesn't campair to the horror of cat juggling.
2006-02-22 01:38:16 AM  
Greatest invention EVAR!
2006-02-22 01:39:21 AM  
Er compare.
2006-02-22 01:41:47 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

/I <3 my Rosie Posie
2006-02-22 01:42:48 AM  
Where might I purchase one of these wonderful devices?
2006-02-22 01:44:13 AM  
I hope to see one of these in my local music shop in the next few years.
2006-02-22 01:44:22 AM  
Genuis!! Imagine what he could do with electricity!!

/I don't like cats; they don't taste like chicken
2006-02-22 01:44:27 AM  
Reminds me of Baron von Munchhausen and the Castrati piano

Cut off in my prime, meine hurtz, meine hurtz!
2006-02-22 01:45:23 AM  
I hope that the ceiling masturbation-watching cat bites all of you in the neck.
2006-02-22 01:46:35 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

2006-02-22 01:46:49 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Funny? My guess - they were laughing their heads off.

The cat piano confirms Darnton's discovery that most early modern Europeans found the torture of cats funny.

that's fuct up
2006-02-22 01:48:48 AM  
Roy seems a bit small in comparison. That's a big ass kitty!
[image from too old to be available]
2006-02-22 01:48:49 AM  
Until now I thought cats were only good as self cleaning mops.
2006-02-22 01:53:14 AM  
organs in mains: How come the piano has more keys than cats?

Because there's more than one way to skin a cat.
2006-02-22 01:54:19 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2006-02-22 01:55:53 AM  
I could not imagine torturing a cat like that.....of course I have the cutest kitty in the world ;)
2006-02-22 01:59:00 AM  
Instapundit ftw.
2006-02-22 01:59:28 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
cat flute?
2006-02-22 01:59:41 AM  
I kill kittens on a daily basis.
2006-02-22 02:11:01 AM  
Loved the Google ad for the Humane Society
2006-02-22 02:12:31 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Panzercat does not tolerate that kind of crap.
2006-02-22 02:13:35 AM  
When you play the lowest note, the oil hits their anuses.
2006-02-22 02:14:45 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2006-02-22 02:15:31 AM  
Executive Monkey

Maybe it's because the melatonin is kicking in...but....

2006-02-22 02:15:49 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2006-02-22 02:22:54 AM  
I feel so bad. Moments after struggling not to laugh at this, my cat started meowing at me to let her jump in my lap.
2006-02-22 02:39:21 AM  
Ha ha, look at the cat on the far right. The oil has definitely hit his anus.

[image from too old to be available]
2006-02-22 02:42:41 AM  
What I want to know is why on Earth those cages kept those cats in. My cat would have escaped and killed every last one of those farkers.

/I honestly think my cat sneaks out at night to kill people
//All of the noisy children in the neighborhood? Gone.
2006-02-22 02:53:02 AM  
I find it disconcerting (and a teeny, tiny bit funny) that the artist's rendering of the cat piano features a cat on the far right who seems to be saying "This is not cool." with his expression.

Likewise, the third from the left, who seems to have "WTF?!?!" on his face.
2006-02-22 02:57:33 AM  
I wonder how they get the high notes on the ccat organ? Oh yeah strike a particular key real hard while the other end has a sharp needle pointing upward under the organs of a male cat that penatrating its nuts causing it to scream bloody murder.

"And now I shall commense, for the audience, the playing of a little tune from Ozzy Osbourne called 'Crazy Train'"
2006-02-22 03:05:13 AM  
strawbury78: your cat and my cat could be twins.

/I miss my cat
//not sure if the tears are from missing her or from the allergies
2006-02-22 03:06:47 AM  
The expressions on the cats in the illustration are priceless. But Tachikoma, I share your question as to how the hell you keep the cats in there. My cat can squirm out of a lot better confinement than that, and he's really easygoing, not, you know, a cat who gets tortured into singing constantly.

Might be able to make a catnip-based version of this though, a lot of cats like to meow with their mouths full of catnip toys.
2006-02-22 03:08:33 AM  
Awwwwwwww ..we just got her a month ago

I know what you mean..I'm on Allegra, Astelin, Rhinocort Aqua and Singulair. I'm a walking ad for allergy medication lol
2006-02-22 03:25:20 AM  
A king in the Baron Munchausen movie had one that tortured his prisoners...I KNEW it couldn't be an entirely original concept!

///power of the pussy??
2006-02-22 03:27:23 AM  
2006-02-22 03:53:42 AM  
Did anyone ever read the Roald Dahl story "Edward the Conqueror", about Liszt reincarnated as a cat?
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