Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Press & Journal)   Son respects mother's dying wishes to have her ashes scattered around the world... by auctioning portions of them on Ebay   ( divider line
    More: Weird  
•       •       •

10598 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Feb 2006 at 9:13 AM (11 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

96 Comments     (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

2006-02-17 07:54:01 AM  
Probably illegal ebay item.
2006-02-17 08:00:23 AM  
I think it's legal, and I think it's genuine.

The auction is here. He's not accepting money - he just wants to get people to spread her ashes in the US, Australia and New Zealand.

He's also auctioning his own soul here, if anyone particularly wants a bit of paper with weirdo's blood on it.
2006-02-17 09:16:03 AM  
What an absolutely gluttonous request.
2006-02-17 09:19:01 AM  
His mother would have wanted it that way
2006-02-17 09:19:30 AM  
One human soul.......slightly you CAN crap yourself in the afterlife.......sweet.
2006-02-17 09:19:43 AM  
Beats using horses to spread the parts to the 4 corners of the country.
2006-02-17 09:20:14 AM  
What is this obsession people have with what happens to their bodies when they die? Especially ashes, which are nothing more than carbon, indistinguishable from anything else. Often times, most of it isn't even from the person's body. Goofy shiat.
2006-02-17 09:21:09 AM  
Pregnant Chad: If that was meant as a Braveheart reference, that was the worst reference evar. If it wasn't, then you can insult me back.
2006-02-17 09:21:12 AM  
I bought someone's soul when I was in sixth grade. 10 cents. I sure wish I had kept that piece of paper.
2006-02-17 09:21:34 AM  

eBay will pull the auction, though, because they are fun-slaughtering killjoys who only exist to collect a bit of the money scammers rip off of other people.
2006-02-17 09:24:16 AM  
Isn't it illegal to ship human remains?
2006-02-17 09:25:44 AM  
I'd buy it....then

I'D HIT IT !!!
2006-02-17 09:26:27 AM  
Has anyone else mentioned this is probably illegal.
2006-02-17 09:27:30 AM  

wouldn't you get all muddy?
2006-02-17 09:29:12 AM  

Ahh yes, hopefully.
2006-02-17 09:30:42 AM  
from the soul auction:

My soul is black, as i no longer believe in god, i no longer need it and even if i did, i would not like to be re-incarnated as anything back to this miserable place

So he's at THAT part of his life. What, is this guy like 25 or something? We're all in pain, jackass, we all get knocked down. It's never going to stop. What matters is that you get back up again.

I think I prefer the old days, before the Internet, when people kept this shiat to themselves, and suffered in silence.
2006-02-17 09:31:32 AM  
When my spinster great-aunt died, her body was cremated. My mom, grandmother and cousins were debating what to do with Aunt Fanny when my uncle suggested they leave her urn on top of an Atlantic City slot machine since she loved Vegas and AC (she once crapped out so badly in Vegas she arrived home with only a dime to call my parents to pick her up at the airport; in the drive home my dad joked that he was surprised she didn't sell her plane ticket, we later found she did and hit a different niece for airfare).

/her urn ended up "falling" off the railing of the Staten Island ferry into NY Harbor, a good spot for a life long Brooklynite
2006-02-17 09:31:45 AM  
...And why should I pay for someone's ash's I have to scatter again?..
2006-02-17 09:32:49 AM

Not vaccum dessicated?
2006-02-17 09:33:44 AM  

you don't, he just put them up as 1p 'cause he has to.

To be perfectly honest, i'd just throw it into the fireplace, or use it as fertilizer. At least get some use out of her.
2006-02-17 09:34:55 AM  
Now you see, what I would have done is put the ashes in pepper grinders and distributed them to restaurants in LAX airport. What country wouldn't she visit from there?
2006-02-17 09:35:43 AM  
Auctioning off his soul? *yawn* I haven't seen that one before, nope.
2006-02-17 09:35:52 AM  
Not amused:
2006-02-17 09:36:19 AM  
Wonder if Ebay requires that the mother in question already be deceased.

This really could be the start of something big.

Poor Entwhistle...he should have thought of this.
2006-02-17 09:37:42 AM

Everything is a travesty with you, man!
2006-02-17 09:38:50 AM  
UberDave has taught me to refresh.
2006-02-17 09:41:22 AM  
therealburkazoid: I take it you've never heard of Sylvia Plath?
2006-02-17 09:42:04 AM  
somebody's gonna buy them and jerk off with them
2006-02-17 09:42:28 AM  
Perhaps the ashes could be added to a reload and Cheney could shoot it off....
2006-02-17 09:43:08 AM  
if it were illigal etc, couldnt he just sell the containers which come with free carbon dust?
2006-02-17 09:51:41 AM  
I just emailed the guy, I'll let y'all know what response (if any) I get.

One time I hired a monkey to take notes for me in class...
2006-02-17 09:51:51 AM  
redly1: somebody's gonna buy them and

Sick, sick sick! them for doing it, you for bringing it up.

But then again, if I pre-decease my biological mother, I want my ashes thrown in her face, when she least expects it. Call it spite, I call it humorous revenge. You would have to know her; some mothers deserve respect, others are evil. Guess which one I got.
2006-02-17 09:53:45 AM  
I'm proud to say that was my first thought, too
2006-02-17 09:54:18 AM  
!!!L00000K!!!! - great feedback, fast shipping!
2006-02-17 09:54:43 AM  
otakucode: I take it you've never heard of Sylvia Plath?

I have now.
2006-02-17 09:57:43 AM  
sacoo, yeah this thread needed a bit of teh funny.
2006-02-17 10:01:26 AM  
I think the idea is good, but I'm underwhelmed that the same guy is also selling his soul....
2006-02-17 10:03:20 AM
2006-02-17 10:03:57 AM  
When i die, all i request is that my coffin is actually coffin shaped (not just a box) and that i have some creepy kinda headstone that goth kids will want to take black and white pictures of. hee hee
2006-02-17 10:05:47 AM  
potato_chip_eating_geek: which come with free carbon dust?

Last time I checked, creamation burns off almost all the carbon, leaving behind a pile of ash-like salts, calcium & phosphoros deposits, and other trace elements. You're basically getting refined fertilizer. Except for all the sodium salt, I would think the "ash" would make a fabulous fertilizer for a memorial garden.
2006-02-17 10:06:40 AM  
I'm not bidding on his soul... it's a scam. Check out his taste in music: Vangelis, Don MaClean, Celtic Mysteries, Relaxing Rainforest Sounds, Navajo Healing Spirits, etc.

Listening to tripe like that, I sincerely doubt he had a soul to begin with.
2006-02-17 10:06:52 AM  
oh....good God. Call it a hunch, but i don't think that ebay was the idea she had in mind......

/Organ donor
//assuming i don't die in a fire or something
///wants to die in sleep
2006-02-17 10:07:48 AM  
I work on top of the tallest mountain for a good couple thousand miles (one of the three that can claim to be the tallest in the world), and might consider scattering ashes there for someone... mostly if it were someone who'd been there before and didn't make it back alive. But I'd probably check with the kahuna who's in charge of observances up there before committing to it.
2006-02-17 10:09:03 AM  
I might buy them ... was she a MILF?
2006-02-17 10:12:10 AM  
Butterfinger, you can't fark something made of ash.

thespindrifter, thanks for the info, what I'm trying to say is, couldnt he auction of the containers, as opposed to the remains, salts, whatever. In order to get around ebay rules?
2006-02-17 10:24:12 AM  
Sweet, but it IS just ashes.

My family just tends to be pragmatic about death and remains. When my grandfather died a few months ago and was cremated they kept asking my aunt what kind of urn she wanted. She wanted to know if there was just some kind of flimsy box she could use to get them outside. This of course made me think of the coffee can in the Big Lebowski.

My mom and I want to know why we can't just get tossed into our woods. I'd be willing to get some kind of permission for it if there was even a system for that.
2006-02-17 10:34:06 AM  
Personally, we should make cremation mandatory.

After all, once you are dead, what difference does it make? You're farking dead.

Seems like it would save a lot of time, money, effort and land.

/used to tell people that when I died, I wanted to be burried with my arse sticking up about the ground. My tombstone would simply read, 'Bikerack'
2006-02-17 10:35:19 AM  
There's nothing WEIRD about this.

This calls for a "PRACTICAL" tag.
2006-02-17 10:48:43 AM  
When I die, I will be cremated, and then put in the food that is served at the reception after my funeral. That way I will be with my friends and family forever, or at least for the next 24-48 hours.
2006-02-17 10:49:18 AM  
When my step-father used to say that he wanted his ash's spread at Wal-Mart...because he wanted to make sure my Mom would visit him everyday. So when he was diagnosed with cancer a year later he insisted that is what we do with his ash's. So after he died, we went to the local Wal-mart and did the deed. Luckily there was a nice bluff with a park like setting that overlooked the parking that's where we did it. Last year after my mom was killed, we decided to spread her ash's with his. Sounds stupid to alot of people, but my brothers and sisters and I like the fact that something they found to be a cute joke between them is something that eternally bonds them together.
Displayed 50 of 96 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.