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(KETV)   Iowa man in trouble after wife shows police his "Contract of Wifely Expectations" including "You will shave every third day," and "You will be naked within 20 minutes of the kids being in bed"   (ketv.com ) divider line
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39703 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Feb 2006 at 11:36 PM (10 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



212 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2006-02-06 07:35:14 PM  
I was going to make a potentially humorous statement about his 'contract', but after reading the following I have nothing good to say about this man.

"Frey was in court Friday ... on separate charges of downloading child pornography onto his home computer."
 
2006-02-06 07:38:12 PM  
"Good behaviour days"

Well hell, this sounds like a perfect plan to me.

How about:

You will do dishes nightly
You will bring your hot chick friends to bed with us
You will shut the hell up during football games

He forgot those I guess
 
2006-02-06 07:42:20 PM  
"I don't know how they can tie this to my client making any demands on his wife. I mean, I could have put these together. I mean, there's no names. There's names on them and everything, but anyone could have put these documents together," McGinn said.

Huh?

/what's wrong with having a contract?
 
2006-02-06 08:06:06 PM  
Oh. I thought the headline was saying she wrote it for him.

I guess that's different.
 
2006-02-06 09:24:32 PM  
Pretty pitiful power trip.

/bet he has a small penis
 
2006-02-06 09:48:01 PM  
with the exception of the child porn thing, I like this guys style. It's kind of like a punch card point system. Michael Jordan for 3, yessssssss! Thanks Marv!
 
2006-02-06 09:53:11 PM  
Lots of couples draw up fantasy contracts with each other. So, yeah, aside from the child porn thing, what's the deal?
 
2006-02-06 10:01:06 PM  
Guy amde one teeny mistake:

He shoul've moved to Saudi Arabia first
 
2006-02-06 10:24:17 PM  
Lots of couples play tie me up and play with rules and suggestions and kink. So, it's really going to be on the wife to prove she didn't voluntarily go along with this sort of stuff.

You kinda want to believe him to be a sleaze, but really, how hard could it have been for the wife to set him up and even download the child porn thinking they'd assume it was him?

/feel sleazy for suggesting it, but still...
 
2006-02-06 11:14:55 PM  
The document spells out how many points can be earned by performing certain sex acts.

We need more details
 
2006-02-06 11:40:47 PM  
RobbieFal: The document spells out how many points can be earned by performing certain sex acts.

We need more details


"Do the dishes and vacuuming while I 'jill myself off' = 50 pts"
 
2006-02-06 11:43:36 PM  
Did his lawyer look like this?

www.ecto-web.org
 
2006-02-06 11:43:55 PM  
Another case supporting Lake Iowa...

/dam the Mississippi River
//dam the Missouri River
///goodbye Iowa, hello Lake Iowa
 
2006-02-06 11:44:07 PM  
"Well she bent over when she was vacuuming and I said, 'Hell, I can watch Bonanza anytime!"
 
2006-02-06 11:45:33 PM  
i wish this were a smoking gun link. then we could truly evaluate this contract...
 
2006-02-06 11:46:39 PM  
Hero tag?

/drtfa
 
2006-02-06 11:47:28 PM  
Can I get a copy of that contract?
 
2006-02-06 11:50:03 PM  
i thought for a second that SHE had the expectations, and that she wanted him in bed naked after the kids were asleep. i was ready to applaud her

oh well

/dude's sick
 
2006-02-06 11:50:09 PM  
I have to applaud the guy. Everyone knows that women don't listen so why not write it down for their dumba*!es. God knows beating it into them is only limitedly affective.
/ashamed of my species
//maybe the porpoises would take me, they look like they know how to have a good time
 
2006-02-06 11:50:22 PM  
when will people learn

never wright it down
never video tape it
never tell anyone about it
STFU

that is all
...
 
2006-02-06 11:55:46 PM  
South Carolina BigFish

never wright it down?

wright?

Spell check is not perfect...
 
2006-02-06 11:57:02 PM  
I can't believe all of you people are agreeing with this sick abusive pervert!!! I am so glad I'm not married to any of you.
 
2006-02-06 11:57:32 PM  
BillSPreston

You are a master troll.
 
2006-02-06 11:58:27 PM  
Just one simple question....

Is that twenty minutes BEFORE or twenty minutes AFTER the kids are in bed???

Based on the child porn thing, I think it is important that we find out about this
 
2006-02-06 11:59:51 PM  
I second NickBob78

/is it too late to a "real men of genius" for this guy?

Announcer: Today we salute YOU Mr. Has a sex contract with his wife guy.

Announcer: Some men leave sex with their wife to chance, but not you, you have a notarized 47 page document explaining just how often you take the skin boat to tuna town

Background guy: All aboard!!

So crack open a cold one of oh drafter of the document that gets you derriere, you may not be romantic but we think you're brilliant!

Background guy: Happy Vaaalentine's Daaaay

Anheiser Bush, St. Louis Missori

(real quick, real dirty)
 
2006-02-06 11:59:53 PM  
WOW, is this guy messed up!

I'd like my hubby to replace the toilet paper roll when it runs out, put the seat down and the like, but to write up a written contract about it says the relationship is pretty farked up.
 
nd
2006-02-07 12:01:34 AM  
You can actually add clauses like some of these in pre-nuptial agreements.. I've heard of expectations of frequency of sex and similiar.
 
2006-02-07 12:02:10 AM  
I'm confused? Why is he in trouble? Oh..N/M, child porn. For a minute, I thought they meant the standard contract.
 
2006-02-07 12:02:40 AM  
works on contingency no money down.

works on contingency? No! Money down!
 
2006-02-07 12:02:52 AM  
Whoa. Two greenlights in a row from our local news station. Fark must be really slow if they're taking in stories from Nebraska.
 
2006-02-07 12:03:06 AM  
"Contract of Wifely Expectations."

What a concept. Wish I'd thought of it.

/"The safety word is 'banana'."
//obscure?
 
2006-02-07 12:03:17 AM  
This Million Little Pieces guy is now in some really DEEP shiat.
 
2006-02-07 12:04:56 AM  
Well, obviously, since the guy is charged with downloading child porn and the wife charges that hes tied her up to have sex with her, shes really just a scheming biatch.

She probably set up the child porn thing too on him. He obviously needs our support because hes just trying to be a man.

Finally, she should be so glad that a man finally convinced her to adhere to a contract which will finally bestow the happiness on both of them that the woman is too clueless to achieve, but that the male knows full well how to enforce.

You people disgust me, and I promise you I've done more kinky, crazy, good sex shiat than most of you will ever have in your life. You all speak like careerists or cowards, not people who know how to live live and treat your fellow human being regardless of gender or age or skin colour or sexual orientation. You want stability and noramlacy? Than stay the fark out of sitatuations of abuse; that was the sacrifice you made when you decided to become the kind of person incapable of empatizing with human beings.

Oh wait .. I forgot this was fark. My bad.
 
2006-02-07 12:05:12 AM  
Braedan wins! Hat's off!
 
2006-02-07 12:06:09 AM  
To honor and obey and to shave evey third day, till death do you part.
 
Pav
2006-02-07 12:07:20 AM  
Anal= 150 points
 
2006-02-07 12:07:28 AM  
Here are some key phrases to put this guy into context for those who haven't read the article:
kidnapping, child pornography, domestic assault causing bodily injury, sexual abuse
 
2006-02-07 12:11:14 AM  
I never came up with anything so elaborate with my GF, but I did establish the firm expectation that there would be no clothes worn in bed and she would be on the curb if she got fat. I think the key to enjoying a sexual relationship on good terms is to make your boundaries clear from the start. The really intractable problems I've seen in other couples have been due to people wanting to hook up fast and then raise their standards unilaterally. As Trump puts it, "The secret to a good marriage is negotiating killer prenuptial agreements."
 
2006-02-07 12:11:44 AM  
I will now do my Vfunct impersonation.

Damn asshole shouldnt be in america! Hes a redneck who doesnt deserve to vote.

We should have seperate states so he can live in a state where we can all get marriage contracts.

I would like a marriage contract because the US is the most dangerous thing in the world today!
 
2006-02-07 12:11:53 AM  
This man is my farkin hero.
 
2006-02-07 12:12:08 AM  
There is only one true goal in life: minimize social friction.
 
2006-02-07 12:12:30 AM  
Bush did it.

/flame on.
 
2006-02-07 12:16:23 AM  
wow. that shut everyone up, eh?
 
2006-02-07 12:16:35 AM  
As Phibb noted above, the best part is definitely the lawyer.

" I mean, there's no names. There's names on them and everything, but anyone could have put these documents together," McGinn said."

Farking hilarious.
 
2006-02-07 12:17:02 AM  
howdoibeginShe probably set up the child porn thing too on him.

Hmmm? I think you forgot this piece of the child porn sentance:

Frey was in court Friday after he turned himself in to Pottawattamie County authorities on separate charges of downloading child pornography onto his home computer.
 
2006-02-07 12:17:25 AM  
He makes her shave her legs every three days?


Oh, that is just mean

I can cruise from Halloween to Memorial Weekend without doing the legs.


:::::I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay:::::::::::::::::
 
2006-02-07 12:18:14 AM  
So what were her standards for you, ShannonKW? That you continue to be an oh-so-manly man and protect her from evildoers? Or -- more likely -- nothing, and you picked her because she had such bad self esteem that she'd put up with your demands without making any similar ones upon you?

I find it pretty funny that you'd complain about people raising standards unilaterally when what you seem to mean is that people should present themselves as abusive asses at the beginning of the relationship, rather than at the middle.
 
2006-02-07 12:19:03 AM  
KRSESQ: Not very obscure, no. Family Guy is about as "not obscure" as you can get, these days.

/The safe words are Juliet Bravo
//Now THAT is obscure
 
2006-02-07 12:19:07 AM  
Frey was in court Friday after he turned himself in to Pottawattamie County authorities on separate charges of downloading child pornography onto his home computer.


Civics 101.....you suspected of crime...police gather some evidence...judge issue warrant....you arrested....grand jury indict.....go to trial....jury convict or aquit....


when you get to the "you arrested" part, it goes much better for you if you turn yourself in, and participate willingly in the justice system. Turning yourself in is NOT an admission of guilt, it's a submission to authority.

Jackass.
 
2006-02-07 12:20:21 AM  
Okay, child porn I'm sure everyone can hold against him. And definately spousal abuse if any of it was non-consentual. But the contract? *shrug* I don't see why anyone would have a problem with that. I had a friend (her idea, mind you) sign a slave contract that pretty much gave me leave to do whatever the hell I wanted to her. Nudity, spanking, tying, pain, etc. I imagine she was disappointed that I prefer an active participant to someone who expects me to do all the work.

At any rate, I don't think such a contract is particularly uncommon or damning. Or really even noteworthy.
 
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