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(Cambridge Evening News)   Hooker bit man's penis after he couldn't pay   (cambridge-news.co.uk) divider line 142
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21726 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Jan 2006 at 4:27 PM (8 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



142 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2006-01-26 11:42:02 AM
If your hooker spends the money on drugs before even having sex with you, AND you are driving more than a hour to find a hooker.........

Well, never mind.. This guy is obviously a moron.
 
2006-01-26 11:42:07 AM
This caused what Mr O'Leary described as indescribable pain.

Nice
 
2006-01-26 11:45:34 AM
z_gringo

Looked at your profile...says you used to be rich? What does that mean. How did you make your $. What do you consider rich?
 
2006-01-26 11:48:28 AM
Man to hooker: Keep the tip.
 
2006-01-26 11:57:07 AM
Anyone else singing Tool's Hooker with a Penis?
 
2006-01-26 12:00:25 PM
smack4u: This caused what Mr O'Leary described as indescribable pain.


But it sounds like he was able to describe it...

*boggled*
 
2006-01-26 02:13:22 PM
woodpecker from mars

Anyone else singing Tool's Hooker with a Penis?

actually, yes... and Prison Sex did come to mind.

shiat, blood, and c*m on my hands...
 
2006-01-26 02:13:49 PM
Mr. O'Leary, for a "hot time in the old town" tonight, call 555-Slurpage

P.S./tip the cow.
 
2006-01-26 02:54:06 PM
At least she didn't try to repossess it...
 
2006-01-26 03:30:19 PM
British teeth are legendary -- British hooker teeth can't be good.
 
2006-01-26 03:34:52 PM
In my city, these men that don't pay or cause trouble end up in the news with a box cutter slash from the temple to the chin, quite deep.
 
2006-01-26 03:44:27 PM
"Does your hooker bite?"
"No."
**CHOMP**
"Ouch! I thought you said your hooker didn't bite."
"That's not my hooker."
 
2006-01-26 03:59:29 PM
I have to admit, I wouldn't mind seeing what they look like. Bet both of them could enter a beauty contest and win. :)
 
2006-01-26 04:29:42 PM
He should have gotten lessons on the "SKIN FLUTE"
 
2006-01-26 04:31:11 PM
Every man who read that article and felt uncomfortable, please raise your hand.
 
2006-01-26 04:32:02 PM
That article was a mouthful.
 
2006-01-26 04:32:23 PM
She only took tips.
 
2006-01-26 04:32:42 PM
snorkblaster: British teeth are legendary -- British hooker teeth can't be good.

---

A mold of the bite mark:

www.dreamstime.com
 
2006-01-26 04:32:49 PM
Q. How do you make a hormone?


A. Don't pay her.


/Got nothin'
//Cues up "Hooker With A Penis" on the computer.
 
2006-01-26 04:32:50 PM
That's bad for the business....


/didn't RTFA
//will not
 
2006-01-26 04:32:52 PM
I'm writhing in pain thinkign about it....
but anyway..yeah ew...

just ew
 
2006-01-26 04:33:07 PM
I submitted this with a funnier headline.
 
2006-01-26 04:33:08 PM
www.metrotimes.com
"And there's the Saigon whore that bit my nose penis off!"
 
2006-01-26 04:34:24 PM
woodpecker from mars

Anyone else singing Tool's Hooker with a Penis?

Actually I had King Missle's Detachable Penis in mind

Kinda ironic...
 
2006-01-26 04:35:11 PM
Tip your hooker, or it'll cost you your 'tip'. ;)
 
2006-01-26 04:35:41 PM
Why do I think that is totally awesome.. I mean worse enough the man had to pay for it..but then he couldn't pay for it so he got his pee pee bit. It makes me ROTFLMAO- because he was a broke John get it a broke JOHN.. LMAO..


//bad jokes r us
 
2006-01-26 04:35:46 PM
That's what he gets for giving a hooker the shaft
 
2006-01-26 04:35:58 PM
I'm so good in bed, hookers pay ME.
 
2006-01-26 04:36:47 PM
That's the Saigon whore that bit my nose off!

http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/1083480-dirty_work/

/obscure?
 
2006-01-26 04:36:56 PM
That musta been a heck-uva chomp.
 
2006-01-26 04:37:40 PM
FilthandsmellphiaScum EXACTLY what i was thinking...
 
2006-01-26 04:38:09 PM
"Don't matter, just don't bite it ..."

/obscure?
 
2006-01-26 04:38:20 PM
Garp's wife wanted for questioning.

www.bbc.co.uk
 
2006-01-26 04:39:38 PM
Your dog submitted this with a better headline.
 
2006-01-26 04:39:49 PM
twofedoras: /obscure?

Dirty Work? obscure?

What are you people? On dope?!

/obscurer?
 
2006-01-26 04:40:14 PM
How did this happen, did the hooker ask for payment in the middle of the act?

/DRTFA
 
2006-01-26 04:40:33 PM
That bites.
 
2006-01-26 04:41:05 PM
He said: "She bit hard. She bit very hard. This caused what Mr O'Leary described as indescribable pain."

tried to prise open Jowett's mouth with his hands while she made sounds like an animal. He pleaded with her and he begged her to let go while hitting her to try to get her off.

Mr McNiff said there was a lot of blood


major shrinkage right now
 
2006-01-26 04:41:24 PM
The headline should have been a PSA reminding everyone to remember to take your dick out of the hooker's mouth BEFORE you tell her you're out of cash.
 
2006-01-26 04:42:19 PM
Thats why you always pay afterward, not in the middle of the **act**.

\\not that I would know about paying hookers
\\\ Why no O RLY owls yet?
 
2006-01-26 04:42:19 PM
sing along with me

TOOL - Hooker with a Penis


I, met a boy, wearing Van, 501s, and a
Dope, Beastie t, nipple rings,
New tattoos that claim that he
Was OGT,
back from '92,
on the first EP.

And in between
Sips of Coke
He told me that
He thought
We were sellin' out,
Layin' down,
Suckin' up
To the man.

Well now I've got some
A-dvice for you, little buddy.
Before you point your finger
You should know that
I'm the man,

And if I'm the man,

Then you're the man, and
He's the man as well so you can
Point that fuc*in' finger up your ass.

All you know about me is what I've sold you,
Dumb fuc*.
I sold out long before you ever even heard my name.

I sold my soul to make a record,
Dip shiat,
And then you bought one.

I've got some
Advice for you, little buddy.
Before you point your finger
You should know that
I'm the man,

If I'm the fuc*in' man
Then you're the fuc*in' man as well
So you can
Point that fuc*in' finger up your ass.

All you know about me is what I've sold you,
Dumb fuc*.
I sold out long before you ever heard my name.

I sold my soul to make a record,
Dip shiat,
And you bought one.

All you read and
Wear or see and
Hear on TV
Is a product
Begging for your
Fatass dirty
Dollar

Shut up and

Buy my new record
Send more money
Fuc* you, buddy.



always wanted to look up the lyrics for that for some reason
 
2006-01-26 04:42:21 PM
". . . straight from the streets of Sussex, they are!"

"Freshen your drink, guv'nah?"
 
2006-01-26 04:44:02 PM
You'd think this kind of thing'd happen more often.
 
2006-01-26 04:44:28 PM
Geez, I hope she used a dental dam.
 
2006-01-26 04:44:29 PM
Manfred Richthofen

I was wondering that myself.

Man: *taps hooker on head* So, um, about that money
Hooker: *mumbles* Mmmmh Hmmmh?

Man: *nervously* Yeah, I'm not going to be able to pay...?
Hooker: CHOMP!
 
2006-01-26 04:44:37 PM
MmmBadEggs:
everyone knows a simpsons quote requires a "/obscure"
 
2006-01-26 04:44:58 PM
home.comcast.net

In my review of Hostel, I referenced this movie when noting how horror films have constantly had to up the ante in terms of gore in order to shock an increasingly tolerant audience.
 
2006-01-26 04:45:06 PM
Yeah, tell her you have no more money while your member is in her mouth. Dumbass!!!
 
2006-01-26 04:45:12 PM
strangeguitar wins the thread

"There is a time to laugh and a time not to laugh, and this is not one of them."
 
2006-01-26 04:45:57 PM
It's not okay to kill strippers

\\Family Guy
\\\Obsure??
\\\\thats it
 
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