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(   Restaurant patrons not amused when they glance outside to see teen displaying the vertical smile. What an ass   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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22003 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Jan 2006 at 12:17 AM (11 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

56 Comments     (+0 »)

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2006-01-18 12:19:12 AM  
Should have had the as(s)inine tag.
2006-01-18 12:19:18 AM  
i lost my appetite
2006-01-18 12:20:10 AM  
Seeing as to how its a boy, scratch the "useless without pictures" part please.
2006-01-18 12:20:28 AM  
Kudos, submitter. I LOL'd.
2006-01-18 12:20:30 AM  
Oh no, some folks got mooned and a kid got a citation for it. Stop the farkin presses.
2006-01-18 12:20:42 AM  
I thought "vertical smile" referred to the cooter. At least, Tom Robbins thinks so.
2006-01-18 12:21:33 AM  
"cracks" me up
2006-01-18 12:22:00 AM  
I think he was just telling them to order the Moons over my Hammy... Its delicious.
2006-01-18 12:23:04 AM  
Just say no to crack!
2006-01-18 12:23:52 AM  
Bonanza Jellybean: I thought "vertical smile" referred to the cooter.

No. I think you're thinking of a "front bum".
2006-01-18 12:24:51 AM  
A 16-year-old Bethlehem boy mooned diners at a restaurant in the city's downtown Friday night, police said.

...and man, Mary and Joseph were pissed at being called into the praetor's station to pick up their son.
2006-01-18 12:25:18 AM  
I thought it was supposed to be a star over Bethlehem, not a moon?
2006-01-18 12:26:30 AM  
'Vertical smile' definitely refers to a woman's, er, 'front bits'. Thus the saying 'I'd walk a mile for a vertical smile'.
2006-01-18 12:27:39 AM  

Don't this kind of immature behavior make your brown eye blue ?

2006-01-18 12:28:00 AM  
Hmmm... I saw that stupid CKY movie where the one guy sticks his vertical smile to the cafe window and craps all over it, much to the disgust of the elderly couple in the seat on the other side.

Now THAT would have been truly worthy.
2006-01-18 12:30:37 AM  
A Farewell To A Perfect Score:

Oh no, some folks got mooned and a kid got a citation for it. Stop the farkin presses

The sad part is that the judge will probably be a complete asshat and make him register as a sex offender and so ruin his entire life. Welcome to the most free country on earth...
2006-01-18 12:34:16 AM  
Sounds like the kid was bummed out about something.
2006-01-18 12:35:06 AM  
Jesus Christ! Wait until your father gets home!
2006-01-18 12:36:39 AM  
How many Lehigh Valley farkers are on here?

2006-01-18 12:38:05 AM  

Sounds like the kid was bummed out about something.

I had to crack a smile at that.
2006-01-18 12:42:15 AM  
but-but-but-but-but think of the children!

//got nuthin
2006-01-18 12:43:47 AM  
Full moon rising
2006-01-18 12:44:12 AM  
Moon Pie for dessert.
2006-01-18 12:45:18 AM

/well, it did!

//forgive me
2006-01-18 12:50:05 AM  
It's just some kid having fun at the expense of uptight jerkoffs. What's the big friggin deal?
I did a couple drive-by moonings in my day.
(By which I mean 4 years ago)
2006-01-18 12:57:57 AM  
>Golf Clap for submitter<
2006-01-18 12:58:37 AM

Male "vertical smile" makes monkey puke!

2006-01-18 01:06:00 AM  

Idiot submitter.
2006-01-18 01:14:37 AM
/Creepy old guy from link
2006-01-18 01:17:22 AM
2006-01-18 01:19:10 AM  
Lehigh Valley suburbia represented (ex).

/It's, not McCall's
//No possible reason to go to A-town
2006-01-18 01:37:36 AM  
Ham on glass. Hold the mayo.
2006-01-18 01:46:47 AM  
what what?
2006-01-18 01:55:33 AM  
"The teen was cited for disorderly conduct and released to his grandmother."

2006-01-18 02:48:34 AM  
My first thought was they were talking about the 'other' vertical smile, you know the kind the ladies' have.

I was wrong.
2006-01-18 03:09:50 AM  
Ah, disorderly conduct. For when you didn't do anything wrong, but the cops didn't like you and wanted to punish anyway,
2006-01-18 03:24:38 AM  
Consulting the authority on such matters reveals that a vertical smile is indeed a cooter and not a buttcrack.
Urban Dictionary
2006-01-18 03:34:36 AM  
Since when is an ass a "vertical smile"? I can't think of any way that makes sense.

/no lips = no smile
2006-01-18 03:37:25 AM  
if you get technical about it, it all comes down to just how far down one moons others...

should a female moon others at the right angle, what % of cooter vs. buttcrack calculation/formula can we go by???

/i'm stuck...
2006-01-18 04:02:40 AM  
oh what would we do without teenagers

Do random, stranger, preteens address you on the street as well ? Usually traveling in packs.
2006-01-18 04:35:55 AM  
I vouch for the cooter theory as well. Way back in 1968 a local band that played high school dances and the like was called The Vertical Smile. Long hair, drum solos, Doors covers, light show.
2006-01-18 06:09:00 AM  
Vertical smile is a new on me. I prefer the term "Pressed Fruit Bowl" to describe the ruination of restaurant outings in this fashion. I also like using big words in reference to asses.

/such as myself
2006-01-18 06:37:34 AM  
Say cheese!
2006-01-18 07:16:18 AM  
Displaying what?????
2006-01-18 07:25:02 AM  
The kid's lucky. That little stunt nowadays not only gets you an 'indecent exposure' charge, if convicted, your ass is on the sexual offenders list in your state. (pun intended)

Actually, it's pretty refreshing to hear the kid didn't get the book thrown at him.
2006-01-18 07:40:32 AM  
Michael Jackson unavailable for comment.
2006-01-18 08:00:07 AM  
Slow day in Bethlehem?
2006-01-18 08:25:01 AM  
Is submitter teh geh? The vertical smile is cooter, not some amoeba-brained male teenager's ass crack.
2006-01-18 08:26:39 AM  
In Texas we call the "the raw red eye". Regardless of sex. However, if a woman does it that severely needs a pube trim we call it "Willie Nelson".
2006-01-18 09:04:23 AM  
a guy doesn't have a verticle smile
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