FARK.com: (1861849) Brittany Murphy gets engaged to Bruce Willis

If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

		Brittany Murphy gets engaged to Bruce Willis (news.yahoo.com)		201
		More: Spiffy

• • •

73793 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Jan 2006 at 3:18 PM | Favorite | share:

Share this link:

URL:

http://fark.com/go/1861849

Bookmark:

Article Comments close

201 Comments (+0 »)

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Last | Show all

puskunk		2006-01-17 12:14:03 PM

So, Ashton Kutcher's ex girlfriend is marrying his wife's ex husband? That will make family get togethers lots of fun.

FarkingReading		2006-01-17 12:16:27 PM

Uh, but not really. It's a funny joke, see? Funny? Ha ha.

She's marrying some nobody. But it's not you. So don't worry about it.

Whamdangler		2006-01-17 12:17:26 PM

That woulda been really good.

TurtleGirl		2006-01-17 12:24:34 PM

that would have been better than good - that would have been glorious

St00pidN00b		2006-01-17 12:25:13 PM

Wow, she looks sorta like a vampire in that picture...

pshaw		2006-01-17 12:25:28 PM

, but only if your name is Bruce Willis.

OlafTheBent		2006-01-17 12:26:24 PM

It's better than bad, it's good.

goodgollymissholly		2006-01-17 12:26:58 PM

Anyone have the over/under on this one?

I say divorced by March 08.

Jabber		2006-01-17 12:27:34 PM

She's marrying a production assistant?? Brittany, always marry up!

limpbalzak		2006-01-17 12:30:12 PM

Wow, she looks sorta like a vampire in that picture...

I'd let her suck me...

exick		2006-01-17 12:34:31 PM

Hopefully she's marrying a time machine so she can go back to looking how she did in Clueless when she was eating regularly.

NikolaiFarkoff		2006-01-17 12:40:09 PM

Whatchu talkin' bout, submitter?

JerseyTim		2006-01-17 12:53:30 PM

Wait.. is this real life or a Sin City sequel?

puskunk		2006-01-17 12:57:21 PM

Lying headline! She's marrying a lowly P.A.!

bigpete53		2006-01-17 02:44:42 PM

Uh, am I not getting the joke here? Where did it say Bruce Willis in there?

/smack me if I'm a moran

show me		2006-01-17 02:50:48 PM

bigpete53: Uh, am I not getting the joke here? Where did it say Bruce Willis in there?

/smack me if I'm a moran

I think it is referring to the fact that Brittany Murphy used to date Ashton Kutcher, who is now dating Demi Moore, who used to be Bruce Willis' wife.

/Funny shiat, right there.

heatherscott		2006-01-17 03:15:58 PM

Well, it would be funny if it was Bruce Willis.

Jack31081		2006-01-17 03:20:33 PM

That would have been beautiful if true.

A+ for concept
F+ for veracity

you_idiot		2006-01-17 03:23:19 PM

Uncle Hank would not approve. I'll bet that guy knows nothing of propane and propane accessories!

Mugato		2006-01-17 03:24:49 PM

Britany Murphy's publicist:
"Hey, Brittany Murphy's getting married to some random guy!"

*crickets*

"She was in Sin City!"

*a tumbleweed blows by*

"She was the chubby chick in 'Clueless'!"

*somewhere in the distance, a wolf howls into the night*

brandied		2006-01-17 03:24:50 PM

I doesn't exactly SAY who she's marrying.

NewHere		2006-01-17 03:25:03 PM

Still waiting for teh funny...

trapped-in-CH		2006-01-17 03:25:04 PM

Yippie-kye-yay!

hartman5000		2006-01-17 03:25:30 PM

Is he following the "formula" as well?

That being, 1/2 your age and add 7 to get the optimum age.

No Such Agency		2006-01-17 03:25:33 PM

I'd hit it.

baycityroller72		2006-01-17 03:25:35 PM

But isn't Bruce Willis married to Bonnie Bedelia, Amanda Peet and Robin Wright Penn?

/my life is one loooong Bruce Willis movie

ga362		2006-01-17 03:25:40 PM

Check out those fantastic mortgage rates.

lordargent		2006-01-17 03:25:43 PM

Brittany Murphy?

fark your couch!

BigHeadWeb		2006-01-17 03:25:43 PM

'the fark? Didn't she used to be attractive?

TheAnvil		2006-01-17 03:25:47 PM

Uh...what was I going to say?

www.elmulticine.com

kabloink		2006-01-17 03:26:15 PM

Jabber: She's marrying a production assistant?? Brittany, always marry up!

But Britney Spears marriage has turned out ok. Of course, I can't figure out who married down in that marriage.

Mugato		2006-01-17 03:26:25 PM

While we're on the subject, does anyone else find the fingercuff action between Bruce, Ashton and Demi to be a little weird?

adragontattoo		2006-01-17 03:26:45 PM

she may be Batshiat crazy but I would still marry her in a heart beat...

In fact I would marry her moreso for being batshiat crazy!

bride_of_adam_cole		2006-01-17 03:26:53 PM

I didn't even crack a smile with that headline. F-

SuperCrackMonkey		2006-01-17 03:27:03 PM

It says she's marrying some dude named Joe Macaluso. Just some Joe. (Now, THAT was funny).

Who has proof of her nosejob?

peachgirl		2006-01-17 03:27:23 PM

Awww... It's sad how excited I just got after reading that headline.

lelio		2006-01-17 03:27:49 PM

I give this marriage 1 year 3 months.

And before you bet against me I gave the Renee Zellwegger / gay country signer marriage 4 months till it broke up.

quiefNpea		2006-01-17 03:28:05 PM

I'd most certainly hit her. And not with my fist.

Is this the schmo?

www.brittany-murphy.com

Soofus		2006-01-17 03:28:12 PM

submitter, your headline is silly. Make up for it by posting hot pics of Brittney Murphy.

... does such a thing exist????

Jekyll		2006-01-17 03:28:15 PM

Come on, now... this must be the biggest setup for the biggest Punk'd-ing ever. Really.. Sooo Both of the Former Willises go for starlets 20 years their junior, who used to date each other??? Or maybe it's some sort of 4-way marriage that's being hidden in this bizarre manor.

Or, it's just Bruce Willis saying 'Anything you can do, I can do better..'

techmaniac		2006-01-17 03:28:57 PM

Who?

BobtheFascist		2006-01-17 03:29:19 PM

What? Who? When? How?

Way to go, Bruce. Hasn't had an ugly one yet, has he?

jonathan_reilly		2006-01-17 03:29:50 PM

Actually- IMDB says he's a grip. Different Job. Union. Much more clout.

Puerile humor aside (what?! On Fark?!) a grip is in charge of the lighting on the set as well as moving the cameras around (in the case of a Dolly grip). He was listed as the Best Boy grip, which means he was in charge.

Not a PA. PA's fetch coffee and green M&M's and dry-cleaning.

Just sayin'

-some farker who lives close to Hollywood and has friends who do those jobs...

casuist		2006-01-17 03:30:22 PM

Wait, the article doesn't say anything about Bruce Willis!

/i jest

fliptron4040		2006-01-17 03:30:47 PM

Is it me or does the "schmo" look like Jon Lovitz...

rh75		2006-01-17 03:31:22 PM

Didn't Eminem hit it?

tricycleracer		2006-01-17 03:31:28 PM

Cheron		2006-01-17 03:31:42 PM

Bill Murry is engaged to Bruce Willis? Maybe we'll finally get Die Hard:Caddy Shack.

scumbucket		2006-01-17 03:33:13 PM

Saw her in some forgetable "drug" movie with Billy Corigan whining his way through the entire soundtrack *shudder*-- seems she has quite the talent for playing drug addled-skank types. And oh yeah, if she gets any thinner, her bones are gonna rattle when she walks.