FARK.com: (1763504) Lifeguard patrolling the area beach in truck runs over a sunbather's head for the second time

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		Lifeguard patrolling the area beach in truck runs over a sunbather's head for the second time (local6.com)		87
		More: Florida

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22060 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Nov 2005 at 11:11 AM | Favorite | share:

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MacG		2005-11-16 09:42:03 AM

Sunbathing is dangerous. Use sunscreen and cement highway barriers, people.

ThatGuyGreg		2005-11-16 09:55:15 AM

lawsuit in 5...4...3...

peachpicker		2005-11-16 10:49:12 AM

She's got a broken face?

BlueDog		2005-11-16 11:14:09 AM

Oh, Florida Tag, you're the bestest!!

Alexandra		2005-11-16 11:14:29 AM

Looks like the Florida tag has quite a bit of job security there....

BXRWXR		2005-11-16 11:14:56 AM

Orland0wn3d!!!11!

Eat The Placenta		2005-11-16 11:16:14 AM

Get me help, get me to a hospital, my face is broken, my face is broken

priceless

binnster		2005-11-16 11:16:25 AM

The sunbather should've learned their lesson the first time and moved.

Diogenes		2005-11-16 11:16:45 AM

I guess I shouldn't have been so upset when I got hit by a stray frisbee last weekend. Ironically, I ran that guy over later.

Liquor In The Front Poker In The Rear		2005-11-16 11:17:10 AM

I love the Florida tag.

I know that everytime I see it, it will be funnier than shait.

Thanks Florida for being so damn stupid!

beat_on_the_brat		2005-11-16 11:17:10 AM

Just when you thought it was safe to get out of the water...

amoricanCrowe		2005-11-16 11:18:06 AM

A reporter asked, "Were you crying?"

"I was crying hysterically," Gonzalez said.

"What were you saying?" the reporter asked.

"Get me help, get me to a hospital, my face is broken, my face is broken," Gonzalez said.

Insert Ric Romano pic here

cHico11		2005-11-16 11:18:54 AM

The victim in question ...

umop_apisdn		2005-11-16 11:19:02 AM

I guess laying on the beach in the sun will make you tired.

Jack31081		2005-11-16 11:19:13 AM

Hey, I got a great idea! Let's drive around this sandy area where lots of people are laying face down or asleep!

and let's wink at all the hot chickas and not pay attention to where we're going!

i wouldn't think this is a tough problem. Either put up barriers to keep people from lounging in the path of the trucks, or don't drive trucks on the goddamn beach.

sh1768		2005-11-16 11:19:46 AM

"My face is broken!" will go down in history with things like "The Redcoats are coming!"

HAL_lives		2005-11-16 11:20:08 AM

well at least she wasn't run over by the guy on the tractor that pulls the rake.

Danger Mouse		2005-11-16 11:20:43 AM

It sounds like these farking lifeguards have watched too many Baywatch Episodes and think they need to race around the beach like morons.

"My face is broken! My face is Broken!" is comedey gold.

YouPeopleAreCrazy		2005-11-16 11:21:13 AM

An investigation Tuesday found Artiz violated the rules by driving about 60 feet east of a line of trash cans.

No, he violated the 'rules' by running over the girl's head.

Maxor		2005-11-16 11:21:44 AM

I love how the submitter almost read the article; It was someone else who ran over the sisters from France. Last time it was the cops who ran people over.

omega-x		2005-11-16 11:23:16 AM

I'm guessing the dude's spending way too much of his time watching the water. Maybe they need to put another guy in the truck whose job it is to watch the damn water.

How 'bout that human cranium huh? Sure the sand was soft, but STILL.

BXRWXR		2005-11-16 11:23:44 AM

Maxor:

I love how the submitter almost read the article; It was someone else who ran over the sisters from France. Last time it was the cops who ran people over.

Yeah, but that wouldn't be very funny, would it?

/Don't be such a wet beach blanket.

JOHNDX		2005-11-16 11:23:45 AM

I was thinking of visiting Floriduh recently.

I'll have to rethink that.

ihatedumbpeople		2005-11-16 11:25:20 AM

"People were outraged that another incident happened, according to the report."

Is there ANYTHING that doesn't enrage people nowadays? EVERYTHING causes people to be enraged for some reason...good lord.

Teutonic_Knight		2005-11-16 11:27:40 AM

We have a tie!!!

beat_on_the_brat and umop_apisdn win the thread!

HAHAHAHAH! Nice ones!

durbnpoisn		2005-11-16 11:27:50 AM

Is there ANYTHING that doesn't enrage people nowadays? EVERYTHING causes people to be enraged for some reason...good lord.

I'm feeling quite enraged that you said that.

Monkeybrains		2005-11-16 11:29:46 AM

ihatedumbpeople - I'm enraged by your comment.

raysun2be		2005-11-16 11:31:59 AM

umop_apisdn: I guess laying on the beach in the sun will make you tired.

*groan* as bad as that is, it still got a laugh out of me. thanks.

rules were established so it would not happen again

oh, that always prevents it from happening again.

Quick, let's make a rule preventing all wars.

There, problem solved, Peace on Earth, no more wars.

andyofne		2005-11-16 11:32:05 AM

ihatedumbpeople you know, there is a difference between being outraged (which the people were) and enraged (which they were not). I don't know what it is specifically, but there is a difference. Looking them up I see that one is an adjective while the other is a noun or verb. I guess that makes them different.

enraged

adj : marked by extreme anger; "the enraged bull attached"; "furious about the accident"; "a furious scowl"; "infuriated onlookers charged the police who were beating the boy"; "could not control the maddened crowd" [syn: angered, furious, infuriated, maddened]

outrage Audio pronunciation of "outraged" ( P ) Pronunciation Key (outrj)
n.

1. An act of extreme violence or viciousness.
2. An act grossly offensive to decency, morality, or good taste.
3. A deplorable insult.
4. Resentful anger aroused by a violent or offensive act.

tr.v. outraged, outraging, outrages

1. To offend grossly against (standards of decency or morality); commit an outrage on.
2. To produce anger or resentment in: Incompetence outraged him. See Synonyms at offend.

freznel		2005-11-16 11:33:42 AM

Don't forget to bring a towel!

/towelie, your the worst character ever
//yeah, I know...

mpmalj		2005-11-16 11:34:27 AM

An official said the soft sand likely saved her life because she was able to stand upright after being run over, according to the report.

I bet this reporter is a Fark user - he seems to understand cause and effect in much the same way most people around here do.

gimpel		2005-11-16 11:39:53 AM

MonkeyBrains

I would be enraged at your lack of enragement.

bitterati		2005-11-16 11:40:01 AM

"Lifeguard Orlando Artiz drove over an embankment and narrowly missed Gonzalez's friend Daniel Martinez before running over and crushing an ice chest and then running over Gonzalez's head."

I hope they breathalyzed him.

purplesmoke420		2005-11-16 11:40:04 AM

They can run over my head, ANY TIME...

/oh, wrong head

Lady J		2005-11-16 11:41:33 AM

Does anyone else hear 'my face is broken' in Ralph Wiggum's voice?

labberdasher		2005-11-16 11:41:34 AM

An official said the soft sand likely saved her life because she was able to stand upright after being run over, according to the report.

Hey, you can stand upright just fine, even sans face.

Kurmudgeon		2005-11-16 11:42:48 AM

Well, I am outraged at durbnpoisn and Monkeybrains and find andyofne's comment outrageous as well.

Lady J		2005-11-16 11:43:12 AM

Om my farking Gawd.

Did anyone else click on the 'girl has 16 pound tumour removed from face' link at the bottom?

jer2911tx		2005-11-16 11:43:53 AM

Get me help, get me to a hospital, my face is broken, my face is broken

comedy gold

/kids today are pansies

Reeve		2005-11-16 11:44:19 AM

This is just further proof that Florida is prejudiced against J. Gonzaleses

Felgraf		2005-11-16 11:44:56 AM

mpmalj
Nah, my guess is he's a fark user because of poor diction. My best guess is that the frace "She was able to stand upright after being run over" wasn't meant to imply that being able to do that was what saved her life. Rather, I think the reporter meant to use that statement to demonstrate that she suffered no major head trauma. Crappy, confusing sentence though, I agree.

davoodooudo		2005-11-16 11:45:33 AM

SuperMilk		2005-11-16 11:47:29 AM

WWI beach bathing victim, post-op.

TalAlpha		2005-11-16 11:49:53 AM

Lady J:

........whoa......If I had any money, I'd donate something to help that little girl.

/going to go look in sofa cushions...

brandied		2005-11-16 11:50:09 AM

Calling David Hasselhof...

Kemistry33		2005-11-16 11:50:29 AM

Holy CRAP THAT GIRL HAS ONE FARKING HUG TUMOR!!

WE NEED MORE FRONT VIEW PICS!!! HOLY FARKING shiat!

TraeHova		2005-11-16 11:51:54 AM

lawsuit in 5...4...3...

No shiat! Are you suggesting it isn't warranted?!?!

Man, some of you farkers are just plain crazy! You think Florida is full of crazies (which it is), but you are ragging on the girl for freaking the fark out?! Let's run your face over with a 1.5-ton truck and see if you don't involuntarily piss your pants.

Oh, and if a retarded lifeguard running over a girl's face doesn't elicit sympathy and/or outrage from you, I really hope you don't ever have children because... wow.

Shrinkwrap		2005-11-16 11:52:01 AM

Horses flyin through the air, kickin you in the face!

therealburkazoid		2005-11-16 11:52:10 AM

purplesmoke420: They can run over my head, ANY TIME...

/oh, wrong head

i like your thinking tho...

Southpaw018		2005-11-16 11:52:20 AM

Sucks to be that chick.

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