That's the media for you. Proverbial left hand don't know what the right hand is doing.

razor blades are tasty... mmmm metal

That's cool. It's not like there are lots of people without health insurance who could use some free xrays or anything.

X-Rays don't detect PCP ;)

As I said in another thread today, I was one kid who proves the urban legend. I got a needle embedded in the roof of my mouth my chomping down into toffee when I was about 8 years old.

Uh, the article actually says incidents _have_ been reported generally. It simply notes that no such incidents have been reported in Demopolis.


/Second time today: reading comprehension FTW on Fark?

Grumblecakes

Based on my observations, a good 90-95% of children ages 5-10 produce high levels of PCP internally. My cousins kids are convinced they're superhuman wrestleborgs. Gotta be the angel dust.

Howsabout we just put anybody who buys a razor blade or pins in October on a terrorrist watch list.

I no likey trick or treating in Demonopolis. Scary. Same goes for Screamville.

Well they can't lose then. Free X-rays for a non-existant problem= no cost to them!

EL_FABREZ: I have no doubt whatsoever that anyone caught putting stuff in candy would be charged with terrorism these days. Hell, I'm surprised jaywalking hasn't been included.

Just goes to show that The People are idiots. What can you expect from the City of People?

/pardon my Greek

That's ok, if you insert said items into certain objects in certain ways, they can pass the x-ray test and still rip into childrens gums.

Retarded children who can't tell if a candy's package has been opened or otherwise damaged or not.

But what does the neighboring town of Republiville have to say about this?

owned

Google comes up with some really strange stuff sometimes.

I wonder how many kids got bouillon cubes, ketchup packets, laxatives, expired coupons, pennies and Taco Bell hot sauce in their loot bags tonight from Farkers.


/funniest thread evar!

What a great idea! I am going to X-Ray my kids' food before every meal! I could X-Ray my kids' beds before bed-time! Maybe I'll Gamma-Ray their brains to make sure that the schools haven't been "corrupting the minds of the youth" again.

I worked at the mall tonight. We gave out coupons with our candy. Half the kids thought they were credit cards.
/not THAT stupid.

I enjoyed the Opinion page: an ode to the best show on TV - King of the Hill, and a guest editorial titled "Don't be amazed when God answers". Oh I will be, Marshall Murphy - Pastor, First Christian Church of Demopolis, I will be.

Gooooo Dawgs!

Buy it. Read it. STFU.

YES! Hometown area finally makes it on Fark!

/had summer job in DeMop, parents work there
//Not actually from there, from county seat 15 miles away
///slashy-slash slash

Just finished passing out the goodies at my house. Lot of very young kids, none of the too-old kind. Payday and mini Heath bars.

Older kids and too old kids got a carmel cube, younger kids got reeses, kitkats, young neighborhood (not imported-get alot of those) got toblerone bars.

get off my lawn!

Kinda sad actually..... that we are where we are.

MMmmmmmmm.... irradiated chocolate...

bekibug: YES! Hometown area finally makes it on Fark!

Props to somebody else from Marengo county :-)

/Parents still live in Demopolis.
//Glad I took the job in Atlanta
///Enjoy visiting demop, couldn't live there

Yes, that's right... fake.

wegl fan: bekibug: YES! Hometown area finally makes it on Fark!

Props to somebody else from Marengo county :-)

/Parents still live in Demopolis.
//Glad I took the job in Atlanta
///Enjoy visiting demop, couldn't live there


Hurray! I grew up in Demopolis and turned out mostly fine...except for all the excess radiation from the overuse of the X-ray machines.

Letting the children inside to drink beers
Razor blades hidden in three musketeers
Screams from the basement, of kids begging to be set free
That's what Halloween means to me



/creative license

Spartapuss

I dig your style :}

American_Idolator and wegl fan, we should have a Marengo County Fark party. Think of the possibilities!

Y'all also realize that now I have to know who your people(s) are and where y'all went to church/high school.

Trick or Treat!

bekibug: American_Idolator and wegl fan, we should have a Marengo County Fark party. Think of the possibilities!

Y'all also realize that now I have to know who your people(s) are and where y'all went to church/high school.


I didn't attend school in demopolis. Moved there my senior year in high school and commuted to finish up at my school. But my sister graduated from DHS.

You can probably guess from my screen name where I went to college.

Shoot me an email... address in profile.

and safteycap there's something scarily demented about that picture.

Clold: That's cool. It's not like there are lots of people without health insurance who could use some free xrays or anything.

Operating a basic x-ray machine isn't exactly an expensive endeavor. Talk to your father or grandfather and see if he ever used a foot X-ray machine at a shoe store. They were pretty common before people started realizing that exposing your body tissue to high doses of ionizing radiation "just for the hell of it" wasn't a really great idea.

I think people including the media take this the wrong way.

I would venture a guess that the number of American kids that go trick or treating every year is in the millions.

Now multiply that by how many years millions of kids have trick or treated.

Now multiply that by how many pieces of candy on average a kid brings home.

When you're talking about that many, I'd be shocked if a needle NEVER made its way into a pice of candy, accident or design.

I guess I'm a bad parent. I took a casual look at my kids' candy, picked out a few favorites and told them to have at it.

Fark it. Its halloween.

"When trick or treating, make a list of the relatives and friends that you want to visit before you leave home. They will want to see your little goblins and you will know exactly where all of their goodies come from."
--"Safe" Halloween tip from the article

"Ironically, in the only two known cases where children apparently did die from poisoned Halloween candy, the myth of the anonymous, sadistic stranger was used to cover up the real crime. In the first incident family members sprinkled heroin on a five-year-olds Halloween candy in hopes of fooling the police about the cause of the childs death. Actually, the boy had found and eaten heroin in his uncles home. In the second incident a boy died after eating cyanide-poisoned candy on Halloween, but police determined that his father had spiked the candy to collect insurance money."
--Excert from "The Culture Of Fear" by Barry Glassner

Grumblecakes

Or acid! =D

wegl fan: bekibug: American_Idolator and wegl fan, we should have a Marengo County Fark party. Think of the possibilities!

Y'all also realize that now I have to know who your people(s) are and where y'all went to church/high school.

Went to DHS. Afraid I stopped going to church pretty early but - suprise, suprise - went to 1st Babtist.

But if you X-RAY the candy it will be all x-rayed and therefore far more dangerous! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

So we get free x-raying of candy on Halloween? So why does it cost so much to X-Ray a human in a doctor's office?