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(   Probably the worst part of high school is the day your classmates find a porn star that looks just like you   ( divider line
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74242 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Oct 2005 at 11:56 AM (12 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

288 Comments     (+0 »)

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2005-10-16 01:57:19 PM  
Okay - this is about bullying. Okay.

Seemed more like gossip. And if gossip is bullying (maybe it is, what the hell do I know?), the it's obviously built into the fabric of our daily life, much like cotton and big oil.

How do elimate the human desire to 1) have jealosies, 2) spread false information about your perceived/real rivals, and 3) not weed out the weak for ridicule and ostrization. It happens everywhere from preschool to corporate offices. It's just what happens.

Bullying. It's a farking part of life. Learn to deal.
2005-10-16 01:58:27 PM  

And slander and libel suits?!

This is an illegal, purposeful defamation of character, after all.
2005-10-16 01:58:43 PM  

Nice story Grampa. Did you tie an onion to your belt?
2005-10-16 01:58:49 PM  

that is crazy that you would put that pic up of the J. Giles Band because I bought a box of records at an auction yesterday and the photos on the cover of the record were a little scary to say the least.
2005-10-16 01:59:17 PM  
So instead of oldtimers telling us they walked uphill both ways through 2 feet of dogsh*t to get to school back in the day, we're going to hear youngsters talk about working 4 jobs and being hopped up on meds at a psychiatric hospital just to make ends meet?

yeah, why not... every one else gets to biatch and moan, so why can't we? arent we entilted to it?

Oh, wait, we havent bent over backwards walking to school and copied and pasted somebody elses work onto a post and didnt give them due credit right away.

you call us lazy....

man cant even formulate his own opinion, had to take someone elses opinion....
2005-10-16 02:03:32 PM  
runchkin -You guys wouldn't last five minutes back in 1984.

Which is why we don't live in '84. Just because things are different doesn't mean they are easier. Knowledge is closer to us now, (via the internet) so we are expected to know three times more and three times sooner than you did. I'm not going to go on and on wasting my time like you did.

/all I've got to say
//just sayin
2005-10-16 02:08:45 PM  
Gordon Bennett
...I tell them that back in the 80's, we didn't have emo. We did, however, have emo kids just like them, but without the benefit of that new name, we could only refer to them as "losers."

Surprisingly, they never take offense when I say that. I don't know why.

I'm guessing it's the ritalin. (Or possibly the xanax. Or maybe the valium).

Even if runchkin did "borrow" that wonderful rant, I thank him for making me aware of it.

Linky, if ya missed it:

Much better than TFA. Oh No! They think I'm a porn star! The horror! The horror!

        /off to play Donkey Kong
/old school
2005-10-16 02:09:31 PM  
runchkin: And sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 20 channels on a switch box and there was no onscreen menu. You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on. And there was no Cartoon Network. You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning.. D'ya hear WTF I'm saying?. We had to wait ALL WEEK, you spoiled little bastards.

That's exactly what I'm talking about. You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled, I swear to God. You guys wouldn't last five minutes back in 1984.

You planning on giving credit for that post there sparky?
2005-10-16 02:09:43 PM  
2005-10-16 01:59:17 PM Geeks2themax

"man cant even formulate his own opinion, had to take someone elses opinion...."

Hey kiddo...If you hadn't noticed, people rarely give credit when quoting popular jokes on fark. You're supposed to get the reference. If you don't, you're supposed to fark off. Now get off my lawn and go play x-box or something.
2005-10-16 02:10:56 PM  
I used to get a lot of David Beckham comparisons when I lived overseas - which was good. I played along a bit, and would sometimes wear a Real Madrid shirt.

I don't get it in North America. Where Beckham is known as Posh Spice's husband.

Mind you I wish Posh would mistake me for Beckham
2005-10-16 02:12:19 PM  

Hey kiddo...If you hadn't noticed, people rarely give credit when quoting popular jokes on fark. You're supposed to get the reference. If you don't, you're supposed to fark off.

Not to mention that half the fun is watching the people who don't get it get owned.
2005-10-16 02:13:16 PM  
If that was a guy, it would have been the greatest day in his life. . .

Unless it was gay porn.
2005-10-16 02:14:11 PM  
I swear 95% of fark is on the rag at any given time.

/what's that all about anyways?
2005-10-16 02:14:51 PM  
Not as bad as actually being in a homemade porno and having it passed around 1200 kids.

When I was in high school back in '90 a guy I ran track with made a nice tripod video of him and his girlfriend doing it to the tunes of B96 Chicago.

Long story short, he showed it to a buddy who duped four copies which subsequently made the rounds of the junior and senior classes.

Both didn't last much longer at that high school.
2005-10-16 02:16:03 PM  
Wow. Has everyone lost their sense of humour today? Either that, or has no one ever received an email forward? I thought that rant was hilarious, and I saw it as the obvious joke it was - making light of those older "had to walk 20 miles to school" stories.

Lighten up, people. Cripes.
2005-10-16 02:17:03 PM  
2005-10-16 01:25:13 PM SaturdaySaint
Do a GIS for Aubrie Lemon.

from this modeling site:

[image from too old to be available]

not bad...

but what does this mean?

Interests -

* Print
* Fashion
* Swimwear
* Runway
* Lingerie
* Implied

Implied? Implied what? haha, is that a modeling industry term for those willing to do some kind of softcore?
2005-10-16 02:17:57 PM  

There's a very simple solution:

Sue the dumbasses (and their parents) for slander and/or libel.

This is, after all, a deliberate attempt to destroy her character.

If she were my daughter, that's the route I'd go, too. At least until it shut the dumbasses up.
2005-10-16 02:18:02 PM  
Funny, I don't know how a story on how some kids teased you about being a porn star, and kids having it so easy are related.

/Boobies in ages
//that being said, if I was in a porno, I'd be so damn happy
///not everyone has it easy...
////I just like doing this...
2005-10-16 02:19:05 PM  
I have to side with the people calling for legal action. Once your parents get the police involved, you don't get bullied again.
2005-10-16 02:20:02 PM  
Hell, I'm so stupid that I wrote boobies in ages...

/I guess I haven't posted in ages, and I don't check what I wrote.
2005-10-16 02:20:32 PM  
Back when I was in high school, we all had carpal-tunnel thumb, from playing space invaders on an Atari 2600.

/not quite that old
// but almost
2005-10-16 02:20:53 PM  
Christian Bale

Implied? Implied what? haha, is that a modeling industry term for those willing to do some kind of softcore?

Yes. Implied nudity. And yes.
2005-10-16 02:22:06 PM  

Hey kiddo...If you hadn't noticed, people rarely give credit when quoting popular jokes on fark. You're supposed to get the reference. If you don't, you're supposed to fark off. Now get off my lawn and go play x-box or something.

no thanks, your lawn is quite comfortable, and i would rather argue about the merits of your posts and everyone elses that agree with runchkin, as you folks seem to think that it is easy for us younger generation to get by....

Oh, and as for my "self righteous
" post, i suppose if no one had pointed out that runchkin had taken that rant from an email, i wouldnt seem so self righteous now would i? no.. didnt think so...

and if some of us are out of the loop on the origin of this rant from ernie cline, then are we to blame?

/go ahead, rock in you chair
//and think about it
///and dont throw your hip out
////going to chase me off your lawn
2005-10-16 02:22:32 PM  

because beleive it or not, we dont all have it that way..... dont let a minority dictate how you think we live....


/Doesn't work 4 jobs
//Isn't hopped up on meds
///Was never admitted to a hospital like that
////parents still married
//never put in a body cast
//Should I continue?
//We don't all have it that way.

I disagreed with runchkin's post, and was leaning towards agreeing with yours, until you headed in that direction. Trust me, I mean no disrespect here, but you're being VERY hypocritical.


On a side note, I've been mistaken for the "Numa Numa Dance" kid. Many times. By strangers. He's my evil twin, methinks.
2005-10-16 02:23:22 PM  
I have to side with the people calling for legal action. Once your parents get the police involved, you don't get bullied again.

And you sit by yourself at lunch for pretty much ever.
2005-10-16 02:23:38 PM  
Geeks2themax: /STFU
//right back at ya

You're right, it was uncalled for. Sometimes reading these things you don't realize how fast things can be posted.

My apoligies.
2005-10-16 02:24:15 PM  
Dennis Miller: Here with a commentary is a grumpy old man. Welcome Grumpy Old Man.

Grumpy Old Man: I'm old and I'm not happy. Everything today is improved and I don't like it. I hate it! In my day we didn't have hair dryers. If you wanted to blow dry your hair you stood outside during a hurricane. Your hair was dry but you had a sharp piece of wood driven clear through your skull and that's the way it was and you liked it! You loved it. Whoopee, I'm a human head-kabob. We didn't have Manoxidol and Hair Wings, in my day if your hair started falling out when you were 16 by 19 you were a bald freak. There was nothing you could do about it. Children would spit at you and nobody would mate with you so you couldn't pass on your disgusting baldness genes. You were a public menace, a crome dome by age 20 and that's the way it was and we liked it! We loved it. Hallelujiah look at me, I'm a bald freak oh happy day! Not like today, everybody feeling good about themselves. I hate it! In my day we didn't have these thin laytex condoms. So you could enjoy sexual pleasure. In my day there was only one kind of condom. You took a rabbit skin and wrapped around your privates and tied it off with a bungee cord and you couldn't feel nothing! And half the time you didn't even know your partner was there. And we used the same one over and over again! 'Cause we were ignorant morons! Just a bunch of hairless, head-kabobs standing around with rabbit skins on our dinks and that's the way we liked it!
2005-10-16 02:26:45 PM  
must be an australian thing to tease the girl over it

i know if i were still i high school id get her number and find out what shes doing saturday night

bow chicka bow wow
2005-10-16 02:29:35 PM  
For chrissakes, runchkin's little speech, despite being all over the net, is actually written by a comedian/writer named Ernest Cline.

See the original here (he's got great other stuff too)
2005-10-16 02:29:36 PM  
greyduk: Ease is subjective in this context, and not knowing any other way, it's not any easier today. Everyone here is just jealous that they had to wait for technology to be invented, and kids are born holding it.

I forgot to add spell checkers and word processors in general to that list. Ever have to deal with onion paper in a typewriter?

Lol. There's no bitterness greyduk, I was just being concise. Yes, of course we would have liked to have the tech as kids, just as those older than us would have liked to have walkmans and Atari 2600's as kids.

Not knowing a different time does not negate the concept of ease of life. And no, I don't think today's kids would fall apart in 1984.

It is easier today. I had it easier than those before me, and those after you will have it easier still. At the moment how having the world's information at your fingertips and instant contact to anyone you know anywhere can be made much easier is beyond me, but I'm sure technology will find a way.
2005-10-16 02:29:49 PM  
I swear 95% of fark is on the rag at any given time.

/what's that all about anyways?

it's all part of the rich tapestry we call life
and you'd better farking get used to it.
2005-10-16 02:29:51 PM  

i dont understand how that was hypocritical... i was stating that we dont have it as easy as some people may think....

/not being confrontational
//just curious
2005-10-16 02:32:14 PM  

This is similar to if you sat by a hot girl in homeroom and she wanted to become an actress. I always thought it'd be cool to see that girl star in a movie where she gets nude and then when the movie comes out, you can say to everyone, "I sat by her in highschool!"

Yeah... um... how to put this politely... ah, screw it, I'll just blurt it out.

That's not "cool".

That's pathetic.

Now if you could say "I did her in high school", that's less pathetic, and maybe some people would think it's slightly "cool".

But "I sat next to the purdy lady who gets nekkid in that movie - she smelled nice"? That's pathetic.
2005-10-16 02:32:22 PM  
as long as its not a gay porn star that looks like me...
2005-10-16 02:32:50 PM  
Christian Bale

I'm not sure, but I think "implied" means, photos where it appears that she is nude (eg. you can't see any clothing), but not actual nude shots.
2005-10-16 02:37:25 PM  
Lifes "rich tapestry" is a bunch of opinionated assholes having a pissing contest over who's opinion is more relevant and accurate? \life is grand when you are the king of youre own universe! \\unplug the computer and step slowly out the door, dont worry all those other people they are youre "friends".
2005-10-16 02:38:40 PM  
If the parents of these "bullies" would have bothered to spank their farking kids when they were young instead of assuming that daycares and schools were supposed to raise and discipline their kids for them we wouldn't be having this problem.

I mean, why were these high school kids downloading internet porn anyway? I've got no guff with giving your kids some dirty magazines, but there's way too much stuff on the net that can fark you up when you're still sexually immature. Find the parents of the kids with the pr0n and give them a swift kick in the ass.
2005-10-16 02:41:02 PM  
2005-10-16 02:29:35 PM trozman

"See the original here (he's got great other stuff too)"

First time I'd heard the audio. I have to say, I like it better as an email forward. Maybe I'm spoiled by listening to really great stand-up comics, but this guy's delivery isn't nearly as good as his writing in this case.
2005-10-16 02:42:29 PM  
Nice Cline quote, runchkin.

I'm only 27, but it's easy to look at the kids today and think they're a bunch of spoiled, sheltered brats. In a way, they are. But it's difficult to blame the kids themselves because they don't control the input they receive from the media and their community.

The younger a person is, the less experience they have with life, obviously. The world presented to them is the only one they know. See, I grew up with G.I. Joe, Transformers and He-Man. Then I grew older with movies like "Friday the 13th" and "Predator," as well as classics like "Mad Max" and "Aliens."

Nowdays, all kids have is that Pokemon-type crap and reruns of "Friends" on TV. When was the last time you saw a decent R-rated movie in the theater? It just doesn't happen anymore. And let's not even talk about music. Let's just say the radio depresses me as much as the television does, these days.

So it's not the kids' fault; it's the fault of all those neurotic and irresponsible parents out there who would rather idiocize their kids like lab rats in confinement, than expose them to the entirety of life. Kids today have no character because of the sorryass parents.

Put THAT in yer pipe an' smoke it, by cracky!

Excuse my tangent. But the story about the girl being mistaken for a porn star is a bit silly.
2005-10-16 02:43:37 PM  
Kids have it so easy nowadays... Do you guys have any idea how farking hard it was to get ahold of porn when I was a kid???
2005-10-16 02:44:54 PM  
My Dad once gave me the speech, similar to Ernie Cline's thing posted by Runchkin. His rant included the end of Prohibition, his brother dying in Korea, narrowly missing the draft for Vietnam.

Then I found out how old Dad really was, and how most of his rant was complete bull, except for the dead brother part.

/poor kid, we never had to deal with issues like this because the information just wasn't freely available to us then, as it is to the kids now. Heck, the best we could hope for is to even see a porn in scrambled boobie goodness by adjusting the cable box to the last channel, then turning the tuning knob all the way up, and waiting until Playboy TV came on the air at 11pm!!
2005-10-16 02:47:35 PM  

Kids have it so easy nowadays... Do you guys have any idea how farking hard it was to get ahold of porn when I was a kid???

No shiat. I looked at the same Penthouses and Hustlers so many times that I can still recall the pictures in my head when I close my eyes.
2005-10-16 02:50:19 PM  
Hey, does anybody know if runchkin's post was actually a quote of Ernie Cline?

Somebody please let me know.
2005-10-16 02:52:06 PM  
God I hope nobody sues anybody over this. People look like each other. Last year I got arrested because I resembled a suspect. It happens. Get over it and move on.
2005-10-16 02:56:54 PM  
Wulfhardt: Then I grew older with movies like "Friday the 13th" and "Predator," as well as classics like "Mad Max" and "Aliens."

You tryin' to make us all feel old?

/saw those all in first release.

Oh and Friday the 13th sucked. Go back and watch it again, the sound is terrible, quality of the film product is bad. Loads of better quality films out now-a-days than that piece. Predator rules, still.

/roller coasters were better back then too, you could actually be injured on an old coaster. Today, heck you would have to bring a cutting torch on the ride to make it truly dangerous
2005-10-16 02:58:19 PM  
so, teen girl gets humiliated in high school. how is this news? :)
2005-10-16 03:00:15 PM  
My name is identical to that of a director in the porn industry. Every now and then I get a call from a high school or college friend who I haven't talked to in years who googled my name and wants to know if I'm now in the porn industry.

I always say yes.
2005-10-16 03:00:21 PM  
Mad Max was not a classic. Mad Max completely and utterly sucked, and would have been doomed to well-deserved and welcome obscurity, had it not been for the actual classic in the series, The Road Warrior (a.k.a. Mad Max II).

Nowadays, though, I have a difficult time watching either without remembering that the Pope is not Catholic enough for Mel Gibson.
2005-10-16 03:00:24 PM  
Selene: The same thing happened to me.
I was browsing threw my boyfriends comp and found a porno featuring my exact double in a three way...
I thought it was hawt =P

Every gf I've had would be flattered to find out I had a porn video of a chick that looked just like them.

Too bad I'm into bestiality only.
2005-10-16 03:02:02 PM  
Well..she's done way more than "implied". Everyone in my town got all excited when her images surfaced. She's a cyber girl and she's also been in the magazine as well...
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