FARK.com: (1708518) Artichoke named most irritating vegetable

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(Some Guy)		Artichoke named most irritating vegetable (smthop.com)		132
		More: Amusing

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7127 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Oct 2005 at 3:45 AM | Favorite | share:

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the_gospel_of_thomas		2005-10-12 12:24:51 AM

depends.

Kitwilly		2005-10-12 12:25:32 AM

No, no, definitely Schiavo.

Neurocrat		2005-10-12 12:29:57 AM

Artichokes are good on pizza. Mmm.. Give me an artichoke and spinach pizza over pepperoni green pepper any day of the week.

maRox		2005-10-12 12:36:12 AM

Kitwilly [TotalFark]

Ordering 1 handbasket with your name on it!

Agreed, artichoke comes in second.

DrunkNun		2005-10-12 12:36:38 AM

Kitwilly: No, no, definitely Schiavo.

ZING!!!

This Is Bold Text		2005-10-12 12:38:13 AM

Kitwilly beat me to it. Damn.

BearToy		2005-10-12 12:50:52 AM

Doesn't that depend on where you put it?

ScienceBoy		2005-10-12 12:51:10 AM

I'm trying not agree. Looking for a more irritating vegetable. i know there must be one but I'm drawing a blank.

/loves freshly steamed artichokes

Tarkus		2005-10-12 12:56:29 AM

submitter, you're not supposed to take them as a suppository!

MsStressa		2005-10-12 01:08:46 AM

Glad people find them annoying -- that means more for me.

EnoMan		2005-10-12 01:15:58 AM

I love me some artichokes.

Boil 'em, tear off the leaves one at a time, dipping them in butter and scraping off the "meat" with my teeth.

My mouth is watering just thinking about it.

dj_bigbird		2005-10-12 01:30:32 AM

Arty went to the A&P to steal some money. When he got there, the cashier gave him some grief, so he choked her out. Then, the manager tried to stop him, so he got choked out, too. A customer tried to call 911, but, alas, the customer got the treatment, too. After all of this, Arty only found $1 in the register and ran away. The headline in the paper the next day?

"Arty chokes three for $1 at A&P"

RabidSquirrel		2005-10-12 02:40:05 AM

Artichokes are so goddamned arrogant. I hate 'em and their smug attitudes.

TommyymmoT		2005-10-12 02:43:15 AM

An artichoke stole my horse, drank my water, and kilt my dawg.

Peaceboy		2005-10-12 03:29:51 AM

Yankeechokes are much more enjoyable.

trez		2005-10-12 03:31:04 AM

popinjay		2005-10-12 03:53:13 AM

Not surprising when you consider they asked only thai hookers.

Bugger_All		2005-10-12 03:54:31 AM

Calls bollocks

Me loves artichokes, escpecially dipped in a good olive oil.

/It's in the veins

JB-NoHo		2005-10-12 03:55:59 AM

Two words: artichoke pee. Or is that asparagus pee? Either way, they're both annoying. They're the George W. Bush of vegetables.

naynoo		2005-10-12 03:56:51 AM

I dunno, tomatoes really piss me off.

desolationrow		2005-10-12 03:59:23 AM

Any vegetable that reminds me of sexual asphyxiation is a winner in my book.

Atario		2005-10-12 04:01:31 AM

EnoMan: Boil 'em, tear off the leaves one at a time, dipping them in butter and scraping off the "meat" with my teeth.

Just as good: take a set of any thin objects (post-its, keys, business cards, etc.), one at a time, dipping them in butter and scraping off whatever's there, with lots of butter, with your teeth.

[They're not just irritating, they're pointless]

totalsecurity		2005-10-12 04:03:44 AM

I know a girl, she lives on the hill.
She won't eat 'em but her sister will.
Here we go, All The Way, every day...

Then she has some fearsome gas.

One time, she let a SBD loose (Silent But Deadly), and both my dogs were looking at their arses with a "WTF?" look on their faces.

Still, I buy her fartichokes as a gift. Thankfully, I don't live with her.

Bucknutz		2005-10-12 04:04:18 AM

I dunno, I have a particular dislike for zucchinis... I'm sure anyone else who's worked on a farm picking zucchinis can relate.

AquaX		2005-10-12 04:06:46 AM

Perhaps this gentleman is reviewing vegetables from deep in Alaska, because here, asparagus is wonderful, spinach is never gritty (you farking wash it, moron), and artichokes are always worth the extra effort.

It's entirely possible he subscribes to my grandmother's 1950s style vegetable cooking: boil the shiat out of it until it's mushy.

Either that, or I missed the obvious sarcasm.

Nightmaretony		2005-10-12 04:10:04 AM

Kitwilly wins, but everyone else is so hot on his hooves....

totalsecurity		2005-10-12 04:11:46 AM

2005-10-12 04:06:46 AM AquaX

Huh? I live deep in Alaska, love asparagus, grow spinach, and give away fartichokes.

I'd rather have a locally-grown carrot or turnip any day. Of course, I have to walk 100 feet to pick them.

I wish I could grow asparagus. C'mon Global Warming!

testbenchdude		2005-10-12 04:13:03 AM

Enoman,

I dunno what's wrong with ppl like you and my g/f. She loves to do exactly what you described. She always eats the whole darn thing and then regrets it the next day...

Anyhow, I hate 'em, and I also hate asperagus. Gimme my lettuce, man!

Bugger_All		2005-10-12 04:13:09 AM

JB-NoHo
You're referring to the Asparagus curse. However, if you try green aspargi and stir fry them, then the jummy will happen and not the peepee

/however, white asparagus is also not to be dismissed
/ 10 AM here and already feeling very hungry. Thanks alot

Scrotar		2005-10-12 04:14:24 AM

I'd vote for brussel sprouts or asparagus before I voted for artichokes. Even cabbage, maybe.

Flopsy		2005-10-12 04:14:39 AM

I hereby nominate Kitwilly for master of the human race.

MadameX		2005-10-12 04:28:30 AM

Broccoli and califlower are the Devils' Vegetables as far as I'm concerned.

Cinch Marks		2005-10-12 04:31:01 AM

fark you, okra!!

SofaKing		2005-10-12 04:32:53 AM

My GF got me hooked on artichokes, still love em to this day. They're worth the effort to eat and are less tedious to get through than crab. Don't boil em like the article says, steaming them only takes 30-40 minutes.

I vote for onions as the #1 most irritating veg. My eyeballs burn like acid every time I cut those friggin things.

totalsecurity		2005-10-12 04:42:10 AM

2005-10-12 04:32:53 AM SofaKing

Crabs aren't vegetables.

HellFace		2005-10-12 04:46:34 AM

naynoo: I dunno, tomatoes really piss me off.

Tomatoes are fruit.

Maxwell_Smart		2005-10-12 04:50:42 AM

totalsecurity: Crabs aren't vegetables.

I have crabs.

SwingingJohnson		2005-10-12 04:57:11 AM

a most irritating vegetable

totalsecurity		2005-10-12 04:59:22 AM

2005-10-12 04:50:42 AM Maxwell_Smart [TotalFark]

I have crabs.

I don't care if your clam has crabs.

They still aren't vegetables.

Pour some V8 on it.

SofaKing		2005-10-12 05:00:47 AM

totalsecurity: Crabs aren't vegetables.

Thanks for the clarification. I can now die in peace.

balthan		2005-10-12 05:03:05 AM

HellFace: Tomatoes are fruit.

Not according to the Supreme Court.

Maxwell_Smart		2005-10-12 05:07:50 AM

HellFace: Tomatoes are fruit.

So am I! Gobble gobble!

totalsecurity		2005-10-12 05:08:34 AM

2005-10-12 05:00:47 AM SofaKing

I'm glad I cleared that up.

testbenchdude		2005-10-12 05:16:00 AM

Sofaking

You haven't tasted crab until you've pulled up 3 or 4 Dungeness crabs out of the NorCal Pacific, dropped them right into a boiling pot of seawater, then dipped the meat into freshly melted butter and eaten them on the pier.

I'll take that ANYDAY over Artichoke, shich doesn't even put up a fight.

:)

and this comes from a guy who used to regularly enjoy Maryland Steamed Crabs every summer.

SofaKing		2005-10-12 05:17:19 AM

totalsecurity I'm glad I cleared that up.

Now I have that jingle running through my head. Damn you!

I was just pointing out that there are other things more tedious to eat that people don't seem to complain about. Damn artichoke haters.

testbenchdude		2005-10-12 05:20:40 AM

oops, forgot to close that tag, sry... didn't mean to yell at y'all

Adaptor		2005-10-12 05:23:15 AM

Really? And here I had it narrowed down to a few other suspects.

SofaKing		2005-10-12 05:24:13 AM

testbenchdude: You haven't tasted crab...

Indeed, although I like snow and king crab much better. I used to eat fresh butter clams on the beach, there's nothin like fresh food eaten outdoors.

testbenchdude		2005-10-12 05:25:11 AM

Amen bro, amen. What was this thread about anyhow?

totalsecurity		2005-10-12 05:27:17 AM

2005-10-12 05:17:19 AM SofaKing

Which jingle?

"Up in the mornin' 'fore the rising sun, Airborne Ranger gonna take a little run.."

I don't hate fartichokes. I'd take a crab, or whale, seal, or clams over one any day.

Unless they're farmed.

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