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(ABC)   FedEx plane carrying "research viruses" crashes in Winnipeg -- 28 days from now, this is gonna get ugly   (abcnews.go.com) divider line 161
    More: Scary  
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30710 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Oct 2005 at 10:05 PM (8 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2005-10-06 04:32:58 PM
Good thing it was only a plan, then.
 
2005-10-06 04:36:54 PM
'Cause if it had been a plane, there might have been problems.
 
2005-10-06 04:37:23 PM
I for one welcome our new Asian Bird flu overlords...

 
2005-10-06 04:37:31 PM
I hate it when a plan doesn't come together.
 
2005-10-06 04:41:39 PM
You call that a plan? Sheesh, when I grew up our flyin m'jigg a thingys had e's
 
2005-10-06 04:51:39 PM
What's de plan boss? What's de plan?
 
2005-10-06 05:10:47 PM
When you submit like, 100 headlines a day, you're going to drop a letter now and then. Sheesh. Tough crowd.

/submitter
 
2005-10-06 08:53:45 PM
I love it when a plane comes together.

;)
 
2005-10-06 09:00:45 PM
I thought we were warned that in 28 days zombies were going to come like 2 days ago. That sentence makes my brain hurt.
 
2005-10-06 10:07:59 PM
On which side of the border did they bury the survivors?
 
2005-10-06 10:08:12 PM
Why, is it going to induce mass menstruation? In men too?
 
2005-10-06 10:09:08 PM
OK I am heading to Vegas who's with me?

/To Obscure?
 
2005-10-06 10:09:40 PM
The crash incinerated all cargo aboard the plane, including four frozen 0.5 milliliter (0.015 fluid ounce) vials of herpes virus and two of influenza, a spokeswoman for FedEx Canada said.

Winnipeg 2005: The new herpes epidemic
 
2005-10-06 10:10:03 PM
First the ebola-rats get loose, then they recreate the Spanish Flu, and now this... which of the seven seals is the one with the plagues and such?
 
vjp
2005-10-06 10:10:21 PM
Be on the lookout for zombies giving each other secret handshakes.
 
2005-10-06 10:11:27 PM
I blame the 'Stonecutters.'
 
2005-10-06 10:11:38 PM
Cue the "This happened to take peoples' minds off Karl Rove..." statements
 
2005-10-06 10:11:47 PM
2005-10-06 10:09:08 PM 45cal

OK I am heading to Vegas who's with me?

/To Obscure?


The Stand?
 
2005-10-06 10:11:57 PM
At least they didn't crash in a jungle in africa.... miles from civilization noting to eat or have sex with but monkeys - mouth watering monkeys.
 
2005-10-06 10:12:31 PM
To bad it didn't crash in Thunder Bay. That is one city that looks like a big case of genital herpes.
 
2005-10-06 10:12:56 PM
"Wow, look at all the soccer teams!"
 
2005-10-06 10:13:40 PM
BRAINS! BRAAAAINS!!

Oh...am I early? Sorry.
 
2005-10-06 10:13:47 PM
Huzanko,

Yep
 
2005-10-06 10:13:48 PM
First step in Bush's plan to gain a third term! Call in the National Guard!
 
2005-10-06 10:14:03 PM
/link crashed already, jeez
I work for fedex

senario #1: plane crashes, no fire. Everything HAS to be packed a certain way. For each type of item, a different type of packing is required. I doubt anything broke open.

senario #2: plane crashes, big fire. Do you guys know how flammable the packing materials we use are? All those pellets and box material will burn the shiat out of any viruses, and then add the jet fuel...

/hates it here
//is waiting for the zombies
 
2005-10-06 10:14:34 PM
Huzanko
"45cal

'OK I am heading to Vegas who's with me?

/To Obscure?'

The Stand?"


No he didn't mean 'too obscure', he meant to say 'to obscure...ity' ?

 
2005-10-06 10:15:03 PM
Yeah, but osborne is almost as good fuzzy!
Why didn't the farking news tell us it was carrying stuff for the disease lab? And after last year's scare with courier's and viruses being transported, why are they still using farking couriers? farking cheapass government, taxes the rich 45%, 14% sales tax, 40-50 cents for every liter in tax, surpluses every year and yet we can't afford a special courier system for the infectious disease lab? WTF?!?
 
2005-10-06 10:16:34 PM
Darn Dropped the o but I like your version better skinink
 
2005-10-06 10:16:35 PM
the crash incinerated all cargo aboard the plane, including four frozen 0.5 milliliter (0.015 fluid ounce) vials of herpes virus and two of influenza, a spokeswoman for FedEx Canada said.


Read the article MORANS!
 
2005-10-06 10:18:13 PM
Great, now we have herpluenza. You throw up after sex.
 
2005-10-06 10:18:28 PM
I concur. This article is only alarming for the first 6 sentences or so, after which its apparent this isn't an issue.

Still.. generating a good scare in fark readers is always entertaining.
 
2005-10-06 10:18:48 PM
How about another Simpsons ref?

I for one welcome our ImageShack overlords
 
2005-10-06 10:18:59 PM
Why didn't the farking news tell us it was carrying stuff for the disease lab? And after last year's scare with courier's and viruses being transported, why are they still using farking couriers? farking cheapass government, taxes the rich 45%, 14% sales tax, 40-50 cents for every liter in tax, surpluses every year and yet we can't afford a special courier system for the infectious disease lab? WTF?!?
exactly the same thing 99.9999% of Winnipeggers are saying

then again everything's gone down hill with winter starting yesterday... 11 months of winter here we go!

/had no electricity yesterday morning
 
2005-10-06 10:19:48 PM
45Cal

Screw that, I'm going to Boulder.

/Cibolaaaaaaaaaaaa! My life for yoooooooooou!
 
2005-10-06 10:20:07 PM
meh, it's only Winnipeg, no one cares if a virus breaks out over there.
 
2005-10-06 10:20:19 PM
ski_adk115 That is just an obligatory joke in all threads now. The guy is full of shiat...
 
2005-10-06 10:21:15 PM
I like how they say
"Winnipeg was hit by an unusually early and heavy snowfall on Wednesday"
Yeah, only unusual now that global warming has taken it's toll. We used to have real winters, now it snows for like 3 months.
 
2005-10-06 10:21:19 PM
It's not at all clear to me that herpluenza can't survive a little fire. I am sure it converts to spore form quickly, and then will convert back in the morning dew when the sun strikes it.
 
2005-10-06 10:21:31 PM
Don't worry, I don't think anything significant has ever come out of Winnipeg.
 
2005-10-06 10:21:36 PM
Great, now we have herpluenza. You throw up after sex.

That is so hot. Can we combine it with Montezuma's revenge and penile cancer somehow?
 
2005-10-06 10:21:41 PM
it was all burned by the fire

/please move along
 
2005-10-06 10:23:03 PM
An addition to senario 1

I spent 3 hours one shift packing one item because it had some glass in it.

THREE F*CKING HOURS

/It was a picture in a frame
//it cost them $80 for the packing, $40 for the shipping
///Packed an amplifier the other day, took 6 hours to put 6" of padding around that evil thing and pad the inside
 
2005-10-06 10:23:41 PM
You've got some red on you, chum.
 
2005-10-06 10:23:55 PM
scenario 3 - Pilot's name was Muhammed - airplane had been secretly modified as a crop duster - plane flew low over the most populated areas dispersing cargo before date with 72 virgins.
 
2005-10-06 10:24:13 PM
Papageorgeo: Winnipeg 2005: The new herpes epidemic


Coals to Newcastle.
 
2005-10-06 10:26:16 PM
My mind has been warped by the FedEx logo. I can't read anything about FedEx without thinking about that damned arrow.

Oh, yeah, viruses are bad.
 
2005-10-06 10:27:01 PM
"... the infectious agents in TSEs survive radiation, heat, and extremes of chemical treatment that normally kill viruses."

I am pretty sure that herpluenza is a TSE.
 
2005-10-06 10:28:50 PM
"Thu, Nov 18, 1999 Reuters World Report by Maggie Fox, Health and Science Correspondent

A pink bacterium that shrugs off the worst radiation and which has been taught to thrive on toxic waste is yielding genetic secrets that could lead not only to better waste clean-up but better treatments for cancer, researchers said on Thursday.

Teams at The Institute for Genomic Research (TIGR) in Rockville, Maryland and at the Department of Energy said they had sequenced the genome -- the entire collection of genes -- of Deinococcus radiodurans.

They say it seems to have thousands of unique genes that help it clean up the damage done to its DNA by radiation, helping it survive where any other creature would die.

Found living happily 40 years ago in a can of food that had been irradiated to kill germs, D. radiourans has intrigued scientists ever since. It can survive 1.5 million rads of gamma irradiation -- a dose 3,000 times the amount that would kill a human. It also pops back to life after being dried out and can live through high doses of ultraviolet radiation. Just last year, researchers genetically engineered it to eat up toxic chemicals such as toluene and mercury.

"This is a significant accomplishment," Secretary of Energy Bill Richardson said in a statement. "Besides the insights into the way cells work, this new research may help provide a new safe and inexpensive tool for some of the nation's most difficult cleanup challenges."

The team at TIGR, which has now sequenced the genomes of 10 important micro-organisms, used the "shotgun" method to make multiple copies of every piece of genetic material in the bacterium. Writing in the journal Science, they said they overlapped these to make a full map of its genes. They found about 3,100 genes arranged on two circular chromosomes, TIGR president Claire Fraser said.

The secret to Deinococcus's toughness seems to be a large number of genes that allow it not to prevent damage from radiation, heat and other assaults, but to repair that damage quickly and efficiently enough to allow it to survive. Radiation, heat and chemicals create breaks in the double helix of DNA that makes up the genes. This can kill a cell outright, or cause it to make mistakes as it replicates itself -- mistakes that can kill it, or cause cancer and other disease. "

If I recall my college biology courses, herpluenza is a prion in the Deinococcus bacterial family.

Be afraid, be very afraid!
 
2005-10-06 10:29:16 PM
So the zombies are going to eat my brain and give me herpes?

That will really suck.
 
2005-10-06 10:30:34 PM
Ok, herpes and influenza. These two viruses are probably the most common in the world. Some people post the stupidest crap here on fark. Unless they join their DNA superstructures to form a super herpfluenza I'd be worried. But until then, it's time to drink and be merry.
 
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