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(View Askew)   To benefit Katrina victims, Kevin Smith auctioning off walk-on roles in "Clerks 2," barbeque at his house, and other interesting items   ( divider line
    More: Spiffy  
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18655 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Sep 2005 at 12:28 PM (12 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

157 Comments     (+0 »)

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2005-09-09 05:32:33 AM  
Is he really going to share food at his bbq?
No, seriously...
2005-09-09 09:22:05 AM  
Check out that first picture. The guy has little scrawny chicken legs. Freaky.
2005-09-09 10:44:16 AM  
Ha! That's a great idea.
Too bad Smith has been out of touch with his middle-class loser roots for so long that I have no confidence in "Clerks 2" being any good.
2005-09-09 11:27:09 AM  
can he auction off his DGA membership card? i'd buy that and rip it up
2005-09-09 11:48:50 AM  
2005-09-09 11:27:09 AM albo [TotalFark]

can he auction off his DGA membership card? i'd buy that and rip it up

There's a Dick-Girl Association? Man... IRL celebrities get everything.

I wish I could afford the BBQ auction. Big men make the best BBQ.
2005-09-09 12:33:35 PM  
Hell I think that kicks ass so fark you guys who say otherwise.
/Enlightened view, I know ;)
2005-09-09 12:33:52 PM  
I'm not even supposed to BE here today!

/Katrina blew more than 37 dudes.
2005-09-09 12:35:17 PM  
It's the Red Cross he's donating to, but Red Cross relief efforts in New Orleans are not welcomed.. not sure about the rest of the afflicted area.
2005-09-09 12:35:54 PM  
In a row?
2005-09-09 12:36:01 PM  
He went back to the Clerks well? I thought he swore he'd never do another Jersey Trilogy movie. I guess after Curely Sue or whatever that movie was tanked he had to return to the teet. I don't know, I loved Clerks but I think a movie about a couple 35 year old convenient and video store clerks would be more sad than funny.
2005-09-09 12:36:04 PM  
How about an auction for a 5 minute lap dance from Eliza Dushku, Shannon Elizabeth, and Ali Larter in those tight black outfits from "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back"? He could probably raise the $150 billion right there.
2005-09-09 12:36:18 PM  
Didnt he stop being funny after the first clerks?

/no, seriously
//think about it
///if you disagree, grow up
////begin stoner flame war!
//katrina blows!
2005-09-09 12:38:01 PM  
I thought Clerks 2 was just a nasty rumor. How depressing.
2005-09-09 12:38:10 PM  
Headline -should- read.

In a shameless self-serving publicity stunt that Kevin Smith auctions off walk-in roles for "Clerks 2" a movie sure to blow harder than Katrina.
2005-09-09 12:38:34 PM  
Try not to suck any dick on your way to New Orleans.
2005-09-09 12:38:56 PM  
Bunch of farkin' savages in this town.
2005-09-09 12:39:05 PM  
I shouldn't have to pay for walk-ons. Ever.
2005-09-09 12:41:15 PM  
Kvin Smith has been afflicted with the Tarantino Syndrome. Each movie is worse than the last one.
2005-09-09 12:41:32 PM  
and yes, i'm bitter, because i sumbitted with a better headline. heh.
2005-09-09 12:42:09 PM  
I thought the Askewniverse was closed? I saw God shutting the book and dancing happily away at the end of "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back".
2005-09-09 12:43:06 PM  
usually walk-ons get paid, not the other way around
2005-09-09 12:43:18 PM  
Wolverine bezerker attack! Shing! Shing! Shing!
2005-09-09 12:44:24 PM  

It's the Red Cross he's donating to, but Red Cross relief efforts in New Orleans are not welcomed.. not sure about the rest of the afflicted area.

Did you even read the article you linked to, or did you just accept the right-wing talking points about it?
2005-09-09 12:46:27 PM  
A real prize would be a speaking role, with Kevin paying for your SAG membership. It's not like you'd be a worse actor than anyone else in the film.
2005-09-09 12:48:57 PM  
the free publicity doesn't hurt, either.
2005-09-09 12:49:06 PM  
Six grand for a farking barbecue?​12
2005-09-09 12:50:11 PM  
Kevin Smith. Now there's a guy who would have been remembered fondly by all if he had been hit and killed by a drunk driver in 1995.
2005-09-09 12:54:06 PM  
Why won't he stop? Someone please tell me. He really shoulda after Clerks. Is he so outta touch he doesn't realize each successive picture is worse than the last, with perhaps the exception of Chasing Amy and Mallrats? And that Dogma is sickeningly self righteous and Jay and Silent Bob is almost entirely unwatchable. It makes me feel dirty that the seventeen year old former version of myself actually thought he was a talented up and coming writer/director. We all make mistakes, I guess. Some just more publicly than others.
2005-09-09 12:55:13 PM  
That said, you can't fault the guy for helping out Katrina victims.
2005-09-09 12:56:08 PM  
If it weren't for such a good cause, I wouldn't bid two cents for a chance at a walk-on in Clerks 2. But since it is such a good cause, I might go as high as a nickel.

/Not dissin' the guy, but his movies aren't exactly up to the level of, say, "Constantine" or "Dogma." (~)

//Added sarcasticon (~) to forestall someone pointing out a tiny error here -- bet someone will, anyway.
2005-09-09 12:57:55 PM  
Wow, can't believe all the Kevin Smith bashing. I've consistantly found him funny, and that's all I ask from the man.

2005-09-09 01:00:10 PM  
How much to get teabagged by Ben Affleck?
2005-09-09 01:00:19 PM  
Kevin Smith must be cool, but I'm not so sure he's cool enough to pay to hang out with, even if it is for charity. If anything, HE should pay to hang out with ME. One weekend with me and my tribe and he'd have himself enough material for a comic trilogy.
2005-09-09 01:02:55 PM  
WTF is wrong with you people..

Kevin Smith should be commended for all the success he's brought himself.. He was smart and able to properly market both his movies and himself.

He's got the best job in the world, bar none. The fact that he's raising money like this is to be commended.

Oh and Mallrats wasn't so hot, but Dogma and Chasing Amy are classics.
2005-09-09 01:03:02 PM  
That's fantastic! He farking rocks. It's good that he's dontating to the Red Cross, too.

And of course they're not providing relief in New Orleans because NO ONE IS SUPPOSED TO BE IN NEW ORLEANS RIGHT NOW!!!!! That's why it's called an evacuation.
2005-09-09 01:04:42 PM  
Hey, at least he's got some interesting stuff to bid for...

/It'll be fun too!
2005-09-09 01:05:02 PM  
BrotherAlpha: as a matter of fact, I did. (right wing? I thought that was left wing.. maybe i'm confused. I never did get too clear on which way was which in politics) Did you assume something the article didn't actually state?
2005-09-09 01:06:47 PM  
Hope he cleans, or has someone clean his BBQ beforehand. It looks kinda skeezy.
2005-09-09 01:07:04 PM  
despite what you think of Kevin's films, it is a good way to raise some cash. so DREW can say "help the victims and donate in return for....a t-shirt" and we can raise shiatloads of cash. Kevin's not as respected, so he has to try harder - that's all. Heh.
2005-09-09 01:07:29 PM  
he and afflect should auction off a 'fruit basket'..
2005-09-09 01:08:05 PM  
How about an auction for a 5 minute lap dance from Eliza Dushku, Shannon Elizabeth, and Ali Larter in those tight black outfits from "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back"? He could probably raise the $150 billion right there.

I'd be done by the time Eliza was... "Catastrophic flooding in NSA's pants, details at 11".

Try not to suck any dick on your way to New Orleans.

You win!

Anyway, the guy is trying to do something to raise $, give him a break. "Clerks 2" may suck, but how cool would it be to be IN it? And for a good cause too.
2005-09-09 01:08:07 PM  
Dogma ruled, so screw everyone who says his films have only gone down hill in quality. They actually peaked closer to the middle.
2005-09-09 01:09:19 PM  
Man... so much negativity. So much anger. Sure "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" sucked, but c'mon Dogma and Chasing Amy were great. I'm looking forward to Clerks 2.

So he's making more "The New Jersey Little Rascals" movies what's wrong with that? People don't read Sexy Losers and say, "Ugh! Why is Clay's latest update another Sexy Losers strip? Why doesn't he do a whole new comic series with each new update instead of always relying on the same series and cast of characters?"

People don't read Errant Story and then complain because all Poe's updates are Errant Story stories.

If Kevin Smith has more stories he wants to tell based around his already established universe then why does that matter? Nobody complains because comic artists keep telling stories based around the same cast of characters in the same universe, why should it be different with movies.

As long as the stories are interesting and entertaining I say let him go do what he does best. I'll even forgive the occaisional stinker. Heck, if anything I'd rather have a new Clerksiverse movie than have the franchise finish on the sour note that was JASBSB.

Even if the Clerksiverse is the pinnacle of Kevin Smith's creative talents what's wrong with that? There's no law requiring people to be good at more than one thing. Let's face it Gene Rodenbery's talent pretty much rose and set on Star Trek. But big deal, he created a universe that has brought a lot of joy and excitement to a lot of people and no amount of brenna and bragga can truly diminish that.

Love or hate his works as your tastes may dictate but don't fault the man for doing what he loves. Everyone should be so fortunate as to be able to build a successful career through their creative passions.
2005-09-09 01:10:06 PM  
i love this guy... great damn idea
2005-09-09 01:10:07 PM  
Sadly enough, I think I will be working the day that this goes on.
2005-09-09 01:12:35 PM  
i always liked this guy. the bennifer movie blew huge chunks even with george carlin in it, but Dogma was interesting and funny. Jay & Silent Bob rocked; Chasing Amy & Mallrats were pretty cool (too bad he couldn't get Liv Tyler to strip ala Empire Records instead of that Shannon Doherty pig) and Clerks was classic. Maybe he can take a clue from the success of Napolean D and get back to what he does the best. who knows. it can't be that much worse than the crap in theaters lately.

anyways anything he can do for the vics is alright by me. he always seemed like a regular kind of nutjob you could walk up to and spark a fattie with. more power to him.

btw - I got hair down to my ass and i'm auctioning off the right to cut off my tail to raise funds for katrina victims. does that mean i get ragged on by you guys?

/ of course you will, this IS fark.
2005-09-09 01:13:24 PM  
I don't care if his movies are good or bad, whether or not he's whoring for attention or whatever, this is good. Very good. I'm not a fan either.
2005-09-09 01:13:46 PM  
Too bad that some kid named "corey" is currently winning all of the auctions with incredibly high bids. $6,000 for a BBQ with Kevin Smith? Fake bid city.
2005-09-09 01:14:20 PM  
Did anyone read the commentary about Clerks2?
-No big-name actors
-The only characters returning will be Dante, Randall, Jay & Silent Bob
-No blatent references to or characters from other KS movies
-Shot in B&W and color on a small budget

I'll give it the benifit of the doubt. Hopefully LA hasn't completely poisoned him yet.
2005-09-09 01:14:49 PM  
Regardless of what you think of his movies, the fact that he's stepping up to the plate to help speaks volumes about his character.

Look, the guy is helping out by doing what he does best. It's a great offer and I commend him for making it. Heck, I wouldn't want any of you ungrateful bastards over to play poker at MY house. ;)

Seriously, if you're going to critique him for being a "attention-whore", let me ask how much money you've raised? Nothing, huh? Okay, how much money have you donated? Oh, I see.

Peace out.
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