Anal Grammar person says it should read "what WAS the MPAA thinking?". Please drive though.

get over it, they didn't show nibbles and pussy so what's there to complain about.

anal spelling person thinks you meant "please drive through".

Ah damn, now I gotta see this sh!tty movie just to spite the CAP alert fundies... well, if I just download the rip in 4 months, would that count?

Aha! we finally answer the age old question of "who will police the police?"

"what were the MPAA thinking" is a quote from the CAP site

Saw this on Friday. I can see why the CAP would hate it. Me, I thought it was relatively cool. Not as good as the He-man movie, or Resident Evil, but then what is?

You know also that the young girls in the audience (early to mid teens) squealed with glee and comments of delight when the scorpion king and the sorceress were nude together.

Uhhh... anyone actually observed this at the movies- ever? And what the hell are "comments of delight"? I think my wife makes those sometimes...

anal irritation man shifts uncomfortably in chair.

The funny thing that these people apparently neglect to realize is that the Bible contains all of the things that are listed here as being 'evil' and many, many, many others that would evidentally make these people explode on sight.

well, if I just download the rip in 4 months, would that count?

If it is, we're both going to hell.

"Murder/Suicide (M)
murder by sword
murder by cutting throat
multiple murders
murder by knife
murder by arrows
murder by lance "

For some reason I think this is very very funny. I wonder what he thought of 'Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels'?

hehehe. One of the criticisms of the movie is 'inappropiate touch'.

"she's touching my special area!"-Ralph Wiggum

Those whacky people at CAP and their ultra-conservative beliefs! What will they damn to Hell next?

Hosea 13:16

I guess I'm just stupid. I didn't understand this web site at all. I have no doubt that this movie is retarded crap, but this site really is hardly better.

What was the MPAA thinking, indeed?

Kelly Hu was the quintessential displayer of female skin. And that she did. All of it a couple times. A lot of it almost all the time. Her main outfit was bare from the ankle to the shoulder, essentially two panels of fabric, one in the front and one in the back loosely thonged to her

So, does he want us to watch it or not?

[b]the violence was massive. The number of sword or arrow killings and murders are uncountable.[/b]

Wow, I just might give this movie a chance now.

And you know that I don't wonder what was on the minds of the young lads in the audience as a young lad in the movie tossed a coin into a "fountain" and "yes-s-s-s-sed" with gratitude for his wish being answered as a nude woman pops up out of the water. But that is not all. More later.

Kelly Hu was the quintessential displayer of female skin. And that she did. All of it a couple times. A lot of it almost all the time. Her main outfit was bare from the ankle to the shoulder, essentially two panels of fabric, one in the front and one in the back loosely thonged to her. Other actresses were hired to display much of their -- uh -- selves as well but sporadically and briefly. While there were no issues of foul language noted, the violence was massive. The number of sword or arrow killings and murders are uncountable.

hahahaha

thank GOD for CAP

So, does he want us to watch it or not?

That's what I'm thinking. All that talk of Helly Hu "almost" naked got me almost revved up enough to go see the damn thing.

I saw it on Friday. There WAS a lot of killing going on, but it was all off-screen, you only actually saw a few of them. Thats the only problem I had with the movie. It should have had an R rating, so you could SEE all the "multiple murders" I'll take visual Death and Destruction over implied Death and Destuction any day.

I wonder if this idiot has ever noticed the irony of the films that he goes to "review" he has to watch to even do so in the first place.

He hates this and finds it so "non-Christian" yet he has no choice but to view it.

Ever check out what he did with Dogma? He had to watch it twice. Got sick the first time he saw it (literally). :)

The best part is if the Bible came out as a movie alone, this guy would hate it. Just off the top of my head-murders, death, naked people cavorting around with impunity, talking donkeys, entire chapters devoted to describing a nude woman, prostitutes and even masturbation. Yeah, the "good book" would score a zero in every CAP WISDOM category.

I guess CAP might have found something wrong with "Spanking the Monkey" then...

This movie sucked. I didn't know it was gonna be a 90 min Xena episode w/o Xena. Great if you're a 9 year old Rock fan or you sport a mullet.

For anyone interested, the reviews of Dogma that Powdered_Toast_Man mentioned above are Here (partial viewing)
andHere (full viewing)

wow, i kinda farked the spacing all up on that one

This man truly is a moron, though. He doesn't mind you being different, just so long as you agree with his views.

If peons like this had their way we'd have a national dress code and stone everyone who didn't like it.

He's never replied to my e-mails, btw, and I openly admit to harrassing him. I know *for fact* that he once sent a TOS report to my Internet Service Provider for one of my e-mails calling him various un-Christianlike names.

Remember that article a few days ago on the street preacher who got a taste of his own medicine from the student with the blowjob sign?

Same attitude, different people.

If I wanted this idiot to tell me what is non-Christian, then I'll ask him. Since I don't want to farking ask him, I don't want him telling me I'm going to Hell just for enjoying myself with popcorn and soda for two hours.

He's the kind of jerk that is a jerk yet doesn't believe he is one because he's doing it "all in the name of God."

News flash, buddy: God is getting pissed off at your "work."

Kelly Hu was the recent covergirl of either Stuff or Maxim or maybe FHM. I'm already a big fan of Asians, but...

Great googily-moogily...

Man, somebody should do a CAP review of the bible. They'd have to stop reading it. Slowly thier kind would come to a grinding hault under the weight of the hypocrisy of thier former way of life. Each one of the bastards would rot a slow death, reeking of almonds with a touch of feces. Then we'd be rid of an annoyance.

So is there a lot of violence in this movie?

Love that Dogma review. I espcially thought the part where he goes on a tirade criticising thought and reason. When someone says "It made me re-examine my faith" he responds with "re-examining your faith is a tool of satan!"

Well played Mr. CAP guy. Well played indeed.

Maybe the MPAA was thinking "Hey, this'll really piss off CAPAlert."

Powdered_Toast_Man: If I wanted this idiot to tell me what is non-Christian, then I'll ask him.

Whoa now, who clicked the link, you or him? I sense some hypocrisy.

CapAlerts comments of "American Psycho":

27 uses of the most foul of the foul words
20 uses of the three/four letter word vocabulary
punk dress
orders to lie
sexual obsession over business cards
sitting studiously over victim's body after murder
laughing and crying at the same time with screaming in a mad frenzy, repeatedly

farking christians.

Scrotar

I just watched Lock Stock.. for the first time this evening. Freaking hilarious.

First of all I rather enjoyed Scorpion King. My brain needed the rest.

Anyway, I agree with the comments that if there was ever a CAP review of the Bible, especially an accurate version, it would get practically zero.

However, and this is the closest I will ever come to defending CAP, this site does not push its beliefs on you; WE are the ones going there. Blame the FARK mods who keep posting the links. You go there to the CAP guy's domain. Don't like it, don't go. I rarely do, and only if I want to get really annoyed.

The site is for the purpose of making sure parents know how to properly raise their sheltered kids by not exposing them to anything remotely controversial. But I don't see this guy intentionally showing up here and ramming his beliefs down our throat. Yet you all seem to want to go to his house and bother him, or go listen to what he has to say and then complain. (The same thing is true for those who complain about StrongBad, but I think I made my point.)

So let the guy who has a lot of issues rant in peace. Otherwise he might actually show up, and then it would be all YOUR fault.

CAPAlert likes to talk about their bible, they like to talk about their John 3:16... Well, Austin 3:16 says I just whooped their asses!

You know, because Rock's a wrestler, and so's Austin, and Austin has the single most fundie-hated catchphrase in wrestling history...

...

Quit looking at me like that.

I guess there wouldn't be much point in saying that this "review" was really poorly written, even by CAP standards ... would there? Probably not.

Blah blah, CAP sucks. Blah blah, far-right fundy hypocrisy. Blah blah, atheist-fundy flamewar.

Hosea 13:16

Illustrates my opinion of fundies nicely. Not that I would have this done to them, but their hypocrisy (sp?).

Anybody take a look at the list of people who run CAP?
http://www.capalert.com/capbrdofdirs/board.htm


Mr. David Bowie Co-director - Evangelism

Hmmm...

Kelly Hu was the quintessential displayer of female skin.

Once again, CAP has inspired me to pay full price for a movie I wouldn't have.

Who does their graphic design? I'm impressed.

* inappropriate touch
* excess cleavage, repeatedly
* many, many instances of dressing to maximize the female form and/or skin exposure, including full side nudity and occasional revealings of gender-specific features
* flash nudity
* sexual talk
* prostitutes making sex offers
* nudity, repeatedly
* portrayal of young boy wishing for and getting a nude woman
* woman straddling prone, face-up man
* nude man and woman together, ostensibly for intercourse
* man and two women together in bed

Makes me want to see it now. *singing* Ass & titties; ass & titties...

Mr. CAP-Guy brings up a good point. Unfortunatly for him though, it works against everything his movie reviews stand for.

Matt. 7:1 "Do not judge, or you too will be judged."

Uhm... what the smeg does he think he's doing with these movie reviews? Calling a movie unfit for Christians? Isn't THAT being judgemental? Worse, Mr. CAP-Guy second guesses Kevin Smith's faith, right after the whole "judge not" thing.

Through the whole of any of his reviews, he basically is saying "I'm closer to God than you are, and I'm right whereas you are wrong." Uhm... nutty.

And here's some of the transgressions that American Psycho had to earn it a score of 0 (among the obvious).

punk dress
sexual obsession over business cards
laughing and crying at the same time with screaming in a mad frenzy, repeatedly
two abbreviations of "Christmas" without "Christ"

I love that 'punk dress' is on there as Impudence/Hate. :-p

While there are very few I would wish this upon, somebody needs to send a pic of Bob Goatse to the reviewer of these films.

That's why religion is so nutty and yet so many people belive it while science is so... non-nutty... and many people refuse to utilize it themselves. See, most people are followers, eg they want to be ordered around. Thus, they can't trust science because it says, in a nutshell "Everyone, including me, might be wrong. Figure out if they are for yourself."

Religion on the other hand, says something more along the lines of, "We are always right. Collection dish is on your left."